 |
THE WORLD'S FINEST
WRESTLING NEWS SOURCE |
| The Latest In
Wrestling Scoops! WHIRL Internet Edition Latest Poll: No.
20%
|
 DATELINE FLASH! - (TWW) In a move that has stunned the wrestling world, the hopeless Charley Hawse staged what has been acclaimed as "the greatest show ever" in the history of the Armory Wrestling Express concern. The Whirl is proud to have brought you this news before anyone else. The exhibition last nitght at The Armory was booked and promoted by Hawse, who agreed to take the reigns of the promotion due to promoter Bill Gargle having a prior engagement. "Well, yeah," said Hawse in a telephoned interview from his apartment, "see Barry was just telling me early last week that Bill probably wouldn't be able to get to the show on Tuesday, and that Bill hadn't gotten around to booking the talent yet, which is normal for him. Since the posters were already printed and tickets were being sold, I figured that I might as well step up to the plate. I figured that since Bill had been good enough to me to give me some work, I'd be happy to help out. Well, that, and I've seen what the A.W.E. fans do when they're upset." Hawse was able to garner a considerably high calibre of talent for the independent show, due to his contacts in the world of wrestling. "Yeah, man, I just thougt that was the coolest," said showgoer Reshmon Jamal Moses, 20. "I've been going to shows here at the armory for a long time, and they've always got some good workers, but they brought in some great talent tonight." Among those appearing at the show were A.W.E. mainstays "Portly" Wayne Hangover, Prettyboy Crank, and Oxydolman. Making his first appearance at an A.W.E. show since "last December" was a returning Jadoo. He was received warmly by the fans as he apologized for his conduct in his last appearance. "I made a terrible mistake," said a chastened Jadoo. "But I've got my life back on track, and I've got my karma re-aligned. I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I wanted to say how sorry I am." The crowd roared its acceptance of Jadoo's apology. Jadoo then introduced his new mentor and guru, a mysterious shape he called, "Maharishi Mahesh Neb-Romyart." Some fans immediately began chanting something, but Jadoo gently quieted them with, "No, folks. Not exactly. Nice try, though." Toward the end of the evening, Charley Hawse himself took to the ring, to a standing ovation, to read from a letter he had received earlier in the day. "Dear Chales," he began, "I'm very sorry that I won't be there for your promotional debut. As you know, things are quite busy here at this time of year. But you have my wholehearted congratulations and good wishes in your endeavour. I've always thought you had a good head for booking and promotion, and I know you'll be successful." All the performers agreed that it a good time was had by all, and that Hawse brought a light-hearted and welcome atmosphere to the locker room. "Yeah, you could tell that he was having fun," said one worker, "and that made the work all that much more enjoyable." Longtime A.W.E. ring announcer "Bufort" told our reporter, "Yes, I've already told you four times that it was very enjoyable. Everyone seemed to be having a lot of fun. Please quit asking me the same question over and over." Hawse brushed off suggestions that he ought to promote future shows. "No, really, this was just a fill-in. I've got a great thing going over at Beppo's, too. Why not stop in this week for the Great Fish Filet, on special? Beppo's is your first choice for food that's fast - not fast food." A.W.E. promoter Bill Gargle was available for comment, but his comments are unprintable. Since we don't know what he was attempting to say. |
|
 Name: Quentin "Jethro"
Sneer Do you know a super-fan of The Whirl who should be recognized on our pages? Are you a super-fan yourself? Drop us a line and tell us about yourself! If you're chosen, you'll not only appear in your favourite wrestling news source, but you'll receive a fabulous free gift! |
