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ON WITH THE SHOW!
What I would do with Wrestlemania and right afterward.
By Joshua Williamson.
I wrote this on the fly and very quickly. So excuse my bad writing. This is also, just my opinion. Now This is gonna go match by match, but to start it off I want to talk about what I feel is the biggest problem with the WWE. Quick Fixes. They suck. Yeah sure, for like a minute the ratings go up, but ya see there not called quick fixes for nothing. Just as quickly as the ratings go up, they drop down just as fast. Really, I love the WWE, I do. Its just that I think that to fix a problem you need to admit there is one. And right now the WWE has a problem. They need to get back to solid storylines. That’s what they’re missing. But I could go one about this all day, so on with the show.
First off I want to talk about what I feel is the most worthless match on the card.
Brock Lesner Vs. Goldberg ( with Stonecold as ref)
Now you might be thinking, “Why is this the most worthless match on the card?
Well as you may or may not know, Brock and Goldberg will no longer be with the WWE after Wrestlemania. With them leaving, what’s the point. Who cares who wins? So what if Austin puts the stunner on them both. The story ends there. On Monday night Raw, they will not be able to mention crap, oh yeah, Austin beat them up, but the thing is Austin isn’t going to wrestle, So there will be no feuds. Nothing. So its just the same old same old. But I have the answer to that. And my answer falls into play with the next match.
Kane Vs. The Undertaker.
Arguably the reason to watch this Wrestlemania. What I would do is simple. Have the Undertaker come out beat the crap out of Kane. Just give him the smack down of the year. But don’t have Kane get pinned. Have ‘Taker knock him out. Win by K.O. Then as Kane lay there in the ring. Have ‘Taker “resurrect” him. Make them the Brothers of Destruction again. The Lights in the arena go out. Some lightning and thunder. Then the lights come back on. Undertaker and Kane are gone.
Now see this is where the Lesner / Goldberg match comes into play. One of the Brock Lesner’s reasons for leaving is because he doesn’t want to get “fed” to the unstoppable Undertaker. Well, if he’s leaving he should at least do the company a favor and job this last time. In the middle of the Lesner/Goldberg match. Right as Stone Cold is starting to get involved. The Lights go out. The lights come back on. Undertaker and Kane are in the ring. Taker and Undertaker take out Goldberg and Lesner. Real quick. Then have the Undertaker take out Stonecold. The Lights go back out. Then on again. Now we got Lesner, Goldberg and Stonecold laid out. They all still walk out, but just messed up. This will give a reason , a storyline, not backstage crap, for Lesner and Goldberg to leave. And Stonecold could start a feud with Kane and Undertaker on Raw. Not wrestling feud, but a psychological one. Of course this would mean Undertaker leaving Smackdown and coming to Raw. My answer to that? It’s a trade. Undertaker for…..RVD and Booker T. Booyah.
Which carries us to our next match.
RVD/ Booker T vs. The Dudleys vs. La Resistance vs. Cade / Jindack.
Cade / Jindrak should win. Why. Process of elimination. The Dudley’s don’t need to win it again. La Resistance aren’t going anywhere. There gimmick is over, and not in a good way. RVD/ Booker T shouldn’t be a Tag team. They are entertaining, but it just isn’t right. They just got dropped there cause the management doesn’t have anything for them. RVD and Booker T should go to Smackdown. Well get back to this later. Cade and Jindrak should win the belts, cause they’re new, and it seems that the WWE likes them, what to do with them after that, well, I don’t know you tell me.
Rock and Sock Connection vs. Evolution.
Triple H gets involved causing Evolution to win. This leads into the next match.
HHH vs. Benoit vs. HBK.
Rock and Foley run in. Eventually so does evolution. Chaos ensues The Rock accidentally hits HBK. Benoit pins HBK. Triple HHH is pissed. Now this only works if Rock and Foley hang around till the next pay per view. Rock versus HBK. Triple H versus Benoit at Backlash. Or even the next night on Raw. Give people the Foley versus Orten match. Three awesome singles. That sets up stories for a few months.
John Cena vs. The Big show.
This one should have been set up a few weeks earlier. At the Royal Rumble. Nobody could get the big show out of the ring, It took everybody to lift him up. They should have kept that up. Since then they should have made it a point to mention that nobody could pick him up. Now is it just me, or is it a more than a coincidence that Bobby Heenan is going to be a t Wrestlemania? HMM? Have Bobby and the Big Show come out together. Reminiscent of Wrestlemania 3. Bobby with Andre the Giant. During the match Cena power slams the big show, just like Hulk Hogan. Puts Cena over big time. Cena wins the belt.
Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero
Eddie keeps it. Lets carry this feud a little longer. Eddie a good champ. And I have some other ideas for this. More on that later. Let Eddie win it straight.
Chris Jericho vs. Christian.
I would want Trish to turn on Jericho and join up with Christian , but Trish doesn’t work as a hell. Too bad.
Trish should cost Jericho the match. Christian wins. I would want Trish to go bad cause then we have a reason for the feud to continue. And really more for Trish to so. An this point shes just a pretty face not invited to the evening gown match, or the next match.
Molly Holly vs. Victoria.
Well, I say, make the bitch bald. I’m surprised at this match. I would think that Lita would be involved.
I like Victoria. I really would like this to be a straight match, no run ins. Let Victoria win it on her own, no Steven Richards. If there has to a run in, let it be Lita. And have Lita cost Molly the match. So then Lita could at least be involved in the feud.
The Evening gown match.
Does it really matter? We’re all winners here! But God forbid a boob falls out, or the shit is going to hit the fan.
APA vs. The Bashams vs. Haas / Benjamin vs. Rikishi and Scotty Too Hotty.
Who? Haha, just kidding. But yeah, really. Who?
Give it to Bashams, the WWE love bald guys. APA should be robed of it though, like the ref didn’t see it or something. But have it be a close one. Like Bradshaw was pinning Haas and Grandmaster runs in causing them the championship. This gives us the reuniting of TOO COOL. It will all work out in the end. Trust me.
Open Cruiser Weight Elimination Match.
I’m taking a little creative freedom with this one. Id have Steiner leave Raw and go to Smackdown. Have Scott Steiner enter the match and win. But wait 9 pun intended) How is Steiner in a cruiser weight match? He cheats. He runs into the and wins.
The next Smackdown, Chavo is pissed, he has a weigh-in in the ring. He forces Steiner to come down to the ring and prove that Steiner shouldn’t have been in the match and therefore should give the title back to him. Steiner comes down and weighs himself. Well, the scale has been tampered with so it says that Steiner weighs a much lower weight. Chavo and Steiner start to fighting the ring., but Rey Mysterio and Ultimo run in and a battle breaks out. Heyan sets up a match for later, a four way. Steiner vs. Mysterio vs. Ultimo vs. Chavo.
I think that’s all the matches. So on with the show.
RAW
Raws a tough call. So I’m going to leave it kinda vague. But with the new additions, Undertaker and Edge it could be cool. That’s right Edge. This is hoping Edge is available at this point.
The Dudleys vs. Cade and Jindrak. Really this is the beginning of the Undertaker vss everybody. At first have then take out the Dudleys, Cade and Jindrak. Then work their way up the food chain, interrupt some of the smaller matches. No matches, just the lights go out then on again. Their in the ring, mess everybody up.
This should happen at least twice, maybe three times that night.
Benoit fights Christian. Why? Just cause. Have Jericho come out. Then HBK. Further the HBK Benoit thing. Benoit wins.
Orten comes out and talks shit. Edge comes out. Starts a feud. Edge vs. Orten for a couple of Monday nights.
Lita vs. Victoria. Molly runs in. Victoria wins.
Stonecold and Bishoff are arguing about Kane and ‘Taker. Evolution come sin and gets involved. Stonecold sets up a match for the next Raw. Evolution vs. Taker and Kane.
Main event:
Rock vs. HBK.
I know this is a pay-per-view style match, but I think that every so often you need to give the fans one of those for free. Or else all they will watch are pay-per-views.
Have HBK win. That way the Rock could go back to movies. HBK wins with Benoit’s help. Why? To further the storyline.
This all gets Evolution more involved with the lower carders, and makes it more of a solid show.
Smackdown.
We start off the show with….
Angle vs. Jamie Noble.
The match lasts like two minutes. Angle makes Noble tap out. He calls out Eddie. Eddie comes out in huge lino-style low rider. Eddie comes out to the ring, he celebrates his win. Angle and Eddie start to square off when suddenly, Booker T’s music hits. Booker T comes out and gets on the Mike.
“So, Eddie Guerrero is champion. Yes, you are. Looks like Latino Heat is at the top of his game. But can the Latino Heat stand the Disco Inferno?
That right I would get Booker T involved in the Angle, Eddie feud, why, Cause I think they could all work well together. They all start to fight. Booker T takes out Angle and Eddie.
Then we cut to commercial.
Next we come back from Commercial with a weight in the ring. Tazz and Cole are wondering what it is. This is the aforementioned weighing of Scott Steiner. And the set up of the four way match.
Next up. We have John Cena coming out to gloat over winning the US.
When suddenly, who comes running out? RVD. Yeah that’s right John Cena Versus RVD. RVD wants the belt. Heyman comes out he tells RVD he has to beat The big show first, This sets up our main event. RVD versus the Big Show.
Now we have, APA versus TOO COOL. But no Rikishi.
APA wins. FBI interrupts. APA versus the FBI. Next week.
Cut to the back
In the back we have Billy gun walking around, Kidman sees him. Kidman says some crap about Billy being an ass man. Billy and Kidman start to fight.
Now we have a tag team champion match.
Hardcore Holly and A-Train versus the Bashams. The Worlds Greatest Tag team runs in. A DQ is called.
A quick scene with sable and Torrie. Just to give the fan some eye-candy.
Now we have the cruiser weight four -way.
Steiner vs. Mysterio vs. Chavo vs. Ultimo. Everybody attack’s Steiner. Steiner still wins.
Main Event.
RVD versus The Big show.
RVD wins the match straight.
End of the show.
Josh Williamson is one helluva writer, but needs one helluvan editor. If you are interested in editing some pieces for this site for chump-change, please let me know.
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