WWF Survivor Series 1991 Review By nWo Scorpion
Joe Louis Arena Detriot, Michigan November 27, 1991
Opening Match: "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, Bret "Hitman" Hart, British Bulldog, Virgil Vs. "Nature Boy" Ric Flair, "Million Dollar Man" Ted Dibiase, Warlord, The Mountie.
This year managers are banned for some reason. Sheri is looking UUUUUUGLY. Flair Tag Team Title is blacked out, although its noticeable which it is. The Main Question in this match is who will do the job? The Faces all get their own entrances. Hey its Mike Tyson's little brother Virgil that was a good movie BTW, Tyson. Heenan calls bulldog a Bullfrog.
"Million Dollar Body 10 cent mind. Whoopy Goldberg hairdo."
"The tough guy from Scotland who wears a little mini skirt."
Heenan: "He's pointing to the guy selling cokes and hot-dogs!" Gorilla: "You kidding me!?"
Dibiase starts with Piper. Roddy chant to start. flair with a knee to Piper and Dibiase gets caught with a clothesline and gets hung in the ropes. Sherri gets pulled in by Piper. He kisses her. (vomits). Piper goes Muhammad Ali on Dibiase. Armbar by Piper tag to Bulldog. Knee to the wrist and tag to Virgil. He stomps his wrist and tag to Bret. Legdrop and knees tag to Piper. Running fistdrop and tag to Bulldog. Running stomp and knees tag to Virgil. he goes uptop and nails a double axhandle. Bret in. Punches to the shoulder and back to an Armbar. Dibiase with some knees and elbows. Bret misses a charge and Dibiase gets pushed into the buckle for a 1 count, reversed and reversed again by Bret for 2. Arm drag to Armbar by Bret.
Heenan: "If savage gets reinstated, who's gonna do the dishes?!" gorilla: "Oh please..."
Bret gets caught with a hip toss tag to flair. He misses an elbow. Inverted atomic drop and tag to Bulldog. Slingshot to the buckle and the face first flop. flair chop. Bulldog with a gorilla press slam. Pipe in and he GOES NUTS!!!! Both men trade punches and chops. Piper goes Tyson on Flair. He falls outside and does the face first flop again. He eats steel steps. Chop by Piper and back in the ring. Warlord in. Test of Strength teased and Bulldog tags in. Both men shoulderblock doesn't work. Drop-kick takes down Warlord boot by Warlord.
Heenan: "The immovable object just kicked the limey right in the face."
Dibiase boot. Mountie in. Jimmy hart sounds like he's having an orgasm
talking about how he gets his man.. Bret in. Dibiase back in. Collar Elbow
tie-up. Bret punches to the sternum. Backbreaker and 2nd rope elbow for 2.
Headlock, Irish whip by Dibiase and the collide heads. Mountie & Bulldog in.
Running Clothesline and elbow by Bulldog. Gorilla Press Slam. flair in and
Bulldog manhandles him. No selling chops. Double clothesline to Dibiase &
Flair. running Powerslam to Mountie. Flair with an elbow off the top to
Bulldog for the 3 count at 10:55. Piper in. Dibiase and Flair take a beating
by Piper. Dibiase stomps him while Mountie works on him on the outside. flair
chop. WOOOOOOO! Snapmare and knee to the forehead. WOOOOOOO 2nd one misses.
Piper with a figure 4 leglock and its hurting both 
men. Dibiase breaks it
and Heenan says Flair did. Dibiase in. Atomic Knee Drop by Ted and Indian
Death lock reversed for 2. Mountie with a Boston Crab
to Piper. Virgil tags
in and clothesline Mountie and another. Elbow by Virgil. flair in. Chops &
slaps by both men. Virgil goes Piper on him. Back body drop. Flair: NOOOOO!.
Dibiase in. Dibiase eats buckle 10 times and falls face first. Powerslam by
Dibiase. Warlord tags in. He boots him. Full Nelson. Piper breaks it with an
elbow and pins him at 16:58. school Boy to Dibiase gets 2. Eye Rake and chop
by Ted followed by a spinning elbow. Suplex reversed by Piper. Virgil in.
clothesline and another. Million Dollar Dream to Dibiase. Virgil gets posted
by Dibiase breaking it. Flair in. WOOOOOOO! Chop-city. back Suplex and tag to
Mountie. Drop-kick by Mountie "Iiiiiiiiiiiiiim the Mountie!!!!!". Dibiase
chops. He tags in. Bionic Elbow to Virgil. Gutwrench Suplex and tag to flair.
Heenan: "Hogan would be soaking wet by now and lost 30 pounds."
Dibiase clothesline. Spinning Neckbreaker by Virgil to Dibiase. Flair in and is Piper. He no sells the chops. Poke to the eye. 10 punches of doom. Inverted Atomic Drop blocked and poke to the eyes. He eats buckle 10 times. Flair goes up but gets slammed by Piper. Brawl ensues. Flair flip to the floor. The referee calls for the bell at 22:46. Everyone was disqualified for brawling except for one man who was on the outside of the ring, Ric Flair! Really good match with a cheap ending. I'll go *** with this one. Piper beats Flair out of the ring. Virgil tosses Dibiase and Mountie leaves after Bret goes after him.
Heenan: "WOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WOOOOOOO!"
Monsoon: "Will you stop?!"
Mean Gene with "Macho Man" Randy Savage. If you don't know what its about (cough TIT) then die.
"Hacksaw" Jim Duggan, Sgt. Slaughter, Texas Tornado, El Matador Vs. Col. Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules.
The faces all come out sperate.
Heenan: "he needs a haircut (tornado) Are you sure that's a hat or a Chihuahua in his hand (matador)?" Gorilla "Will you stop!?"
Tito starts with Skinner. USA chants.
"One guy barely speaks English, the other guy, tornado, he barely understands English, and Slaughter he talks that military jive."
Matador with a headlock. Skinner with a pin for 2.
Heenan: "Jim Louis arena what a.." Monsoon "Joe Louis Joe Louis. Who's Jim Louis?" Heenan: "Who's Joe Louis?" Monsoon: "Will you stop." Heenan: What a great hockey player he was." Monsoon: "Brain if you keep quiet no one will no how stupid you are." Heenan: "that's the Flying Jalapeno. Since he went back to his rusk." Monsoon: You mean roots" Heenan: No rusk he got his ponytail pulled back. How do you like those tights on Santana? Monsoon: "What's wrong with that? Irevesint Green. Heenan: no Irevesint Guacamole. Beautiful flying Taco.
Tornado in and Berzerker pounds on him. He misses a clothesline ad dropkick. tornado goes after all the heels.
Heenan: "you realize when Duggan looks across the ring he sees 8?!"
Duggan in with Hercules. HOOOOOOOOOO! side headlock. Shoulderblock by Hercules. They exchange rights. Berzerker eats a right as does Skinner. The heels quadruple team. Berzerker.
Monsoon "Then they forfeit with their hands on their heads." Heenan: That's to check if any hair grew."
'Zerk with some kicks. Elbow and tag to Mustafa. He sends Duggan into his boot.
Monsoon: He spat on him Heenan: He spit on him. Monsoon: that's what I said he spat on him. Heenan: No he spit on him. Spat on the things you spit on your shoes. monsoon: Can you get me a few security guards please? Heenan: Why? Your gonna have another hot-dog?
Duggan Shoulderblock and runs into a thrust to the neck. Bake rake. Duggan
with the 3 punches of Doom. 2 count by Sheik. Duggan with a Suplex and
Bulldog, Slaughter tags in. Atomic Drop and clothesline sends Mustafa packing
at 7:54. Berzerker in. Berzerker with a clothesline and boots to the stomach.
Slaughter bump in the corner.
Heenan: "He's like the energizer wabbit. He never stops he keeps moving."
Hercules in. Slaughter eats post for 2. And again. Boot to the head. Berzerker in. Slaughter hangs him on the ropes and has him ride them. Kick to the knee and Berzerker splits his legs. Duggan in. Kick to the head and clothesline over the top rope. He rushes Duggan and gets dumped over the top rope again. Tornado in. He attacks Skinner and goes back to Berzerker. Hercules in tornado tags Tito. He nails a fist to the ribs.
Monsoon: The Paseo Del Muerte Heenan: did you El Paso de Salsa? I guess the taco king rang his bell. As in Taco bell I guess.
Hercules was pinned at 12:01. By Tito. Skinner works over Tito with punches.
Berzerker in. He nails some punches. clothesline sends Tito down. Skinner in
and a slam. shoulder-thrust by Tito. Slaughter tag and school boys skinner at
13:27. its down 4 to 1. Slaughter sling shots Berzerker back and forth and
Duggan nails the 3 point stance for the pin at 14:14. God that was horrible.
*. Heenan's
commentary alone made me not pay any attention.
Coliseum Video exclusive with Duggan's team going to the locker room.
Mean Gene with Jake "the Snake" Roberts. Trust me. Trust me. This is a damn good interview.
Superstars of wrestling recap from 2 weeks ago. Hogan is on the funeral parlor. Flair comes out and gets in Hogan's face. Hogan punches him and UT sneaks up on him and clobbers him with the Urn. Savage & Piper try saving him and they both hit UT with a chair, which he no sells. He rips off the cross but it burns his hand and drops it in fear.
WWF-Championship Match: Hulk Hogan © Vs. The Undertaker
Hulkster Rules Brother! Hogan is being cheered like nuts. Hogan destroys the
coffin with his logo painted on it. Ut shoves Hogan 
and misses an elbow. UT
has only 1 TATTOO! side headlock by Hogan. Irish whip by Taker, shoulderblock
sends Hogan down and out of the ring. UT with a choke on Hogan and we get a
shot of my no eyeballs. Throat Thrusts. He tries to rip off his face.
He
chokes him on the top rope now. Bearer chokes on Hogan and Gorilla calls him
a piece of garbage.
Heenan: "My Monitor went out." Monsoon: "Your brain went out!!"
UT elbow misses. Hogan with a few roundhouse rights. Clothesline staggers him. Slam doesn't work as UT fights out. Eye Rake. And another. Running elbow. Punch and chop. He eats buckle. He eats another. Punch. And another. clothesline and 360 by the undertaker but lands on his feet. Hogan eats ring steps by going to the outside after him. He chokes Hogan now with the microphone cord. UT with more chokes and Bearer gets in another cheap shot. UT chokes Hogan in the middle rope. The Hulk-a-maniac I just noticed who dresses like Hogan all the time is here. Face grip by Taker. Hulkster choke on his face. Hulk getting up. He breaks the grip. Kick and another. Shoulderblock staggers him but UT comes back with a flying clothesline to a huge pop. Tombstone Piledriver and Hogan hulks up! UT is shocked. Punch, Punch, Punch, running fist. Punch. And another, he drops to one knee. Hogan eye rake, Scoop Slam!! Flair coming to the ring. Legdrop stopped by Bearer. Hogan attacks Flair. Big Boot by Hogan but UT is up and scoops up Hogan and tombstones him onto a steel chair for the win at 12:43 for the WWF Title. *1/2. Hogan is laid out for the next 5 or so minutes as Heenan cheers.
Mean Gene is with Roddy Piper. He's pissed that UT is the new champion.
Sean Mooney now with Mr. Perfect & Nature Boy. More Hogan referred promos.
Gene now with Natural Disasters & IRS No more Hogan talk here.
Mooney with LOD & Bossman. Funny bit as Hawk says EUUUUUUUUUUUUAH and Mooney interrupts him. Hawk says don't you ever" and "what a rush."
Mean Gene is with Tunney. UT will defend against Hulk Hogan at Tuesday in Texas.
FINALLY LIVE ACTION!!
The Rockers & The Bushwhackers Vs. The Nasty Boys & Beverly Brothers.
This match isn't going to be pretty. Look at 1/2 the mugs in it? (shudders) Rockers entrance wakes up the dead crowd. Butch I think is starting with Knobbs. Knee lift by Knobbs. Eye rake by butch and they exchange punches. Knee by Butch and a knee lift. double clothesline and they double noggin knocker the nastiness. Beverly's turn to get whooped. Battering Ram to both men. Drop-kicks by the rockers to the Nasties. Marty looks high.
Monsoon: who's the captain of the team the Beverly's? Heenan: I think its the ones in long tights. Monsoon: They all got long tights!
Monsoon: I thought the brains were Luke. Heenan: Luke!?!? (gotta be heard to be appreciated.
Beau with a backbreaker to Shawn. Knobbs in and gets caught with a high knee. Luke in. 2nd rope clothesline ends his night at 5:19. Shawn gets caught with an axhandle to the back. Sags works him over. More T.I.T buildup. Body Press by Shawn to Sags and an arm drag. a dumb retard gets in the cameras way.
The Card for T.I.T.... The Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan Randy Savage vs. Jake Roberts Bret Hart vs. Skinner British Bulldog vs. Warlord Tito Santana & Virgil Vs. Ted Dibiase & Repo Man
Marty works an armbar on Sags. shoulderblock by Sags. Marty with a for armdrags and an armbar. Blake Beverly in. Perfect like snapmare. Backflip and thrust kick by Marty. Armbar by MJ. Side headlock but Blake takes him to the ropes. Marty messed up a leap frog. Gutwrench suplex by Blake. or Beau?
Monsoon: I have trouble telling Blake & Beau apart. Heenan: Beaus the one with the blond hair Monsoon: that helps a lot.
Butch tags in as does Beau. Clothesline. Clothesline to Blake. Beverly Bomb eliminates Butch. Imagine a 3d except the x-factor minus splitting the legs. The time of the fall BTW was 10:12. Marty with a spinning elbow. Monkey Flip and huricanrana by Marty for 2. Enziguri by Marty and Beau tags in. Shawn back in. Armbar. Beau with a headbutt. Beau chokes Shawn on the second rope. Blake in. he throws him out and Knobbs works him over.
Heenan: I wonder if any of Shawn's girlfriends is singing that song "my boyfriends back."
Side slam reversed and back slide by Shawn gets 3 at 13:58.. 3rd person other
then Steamboat & Haynes I've seen do that. Knobbs punches him. Sunset flip by
Shawn for 2. Monsoon trying to make Marty to be a heel. Drop-kick sends Sags
out. Shawn debuts the diving clothesline from the apron to the floor on Sags.
He eats a Sags fist. Beau with a legdrop. Or Blake? Kick by HBK and Marty
tags in. Punches to Knobbs. He runs wild. Flying elbow and snapmare for 2.
Forearms by MJ. Blake/Beau in whatever. He walks into an armbar. Gutwrench
sunset flip gets 2 by Jannetty. Knobbs in. Axhandle to the back. More TIT
splurging. Sags in. Pump-handle Slam by sags. back suplex and a tag to
Knobbs. Splash hits knees and Shawn tags in.
Clothesline and a slingshot on
Beau. Triple noggin Knocker AKA Sandwich job. Marty slams Sags but his feet
nail Shawn and Knobbs pins him at 19:40. Shawn gets in Martys face. They calm
down and Shawn tells him to get 'em.
Monsoon says Heenan only looks at the
pictures of WWF magazine and can;t read. Knobbs eats feet and a top rope
bulldog gets 2. or a 0. Marty gets tossed over. Marty pulls Knobbs out and
whips him in the buckle. Marty up top, he nails a body press on the nasties
into the aisleway. Spinning Hair pulling face slam to Beverly small package
to sags by Knobbs turns him over for the win at 23:11. Good match after the
whackers left. **1/2. Beau/or Blake & Nasties win. 
Big Boss Man & Legion of Doom vs. IRS & Natural Disasters.
Finally. The end of the line. Boss man starts with IRS Kneelifts by Irwin but gets tripped up. Headbutt by Bossman. Boss man pulls out the spinning around running move with a boot to the face to finish. He runs under the bottom, runs back around the post in the ring, ducks a clothesline and nails a clothesline or big boot. Animal in and faces off with Earthquake. sideheadlock by animal. Shoulderblock does nothing. Quake with a backbreaker and misses a big splash. Drop-kick by animal and a shoulder tackle for 2. IRS and Hawk in. Armbar by Hawk. IRS gets to the ropes and gets pounded. Scoop Slam and gets tosses into Typhoon followed by a drop-kick gets 2. Animal and Bossman work over Typhoon in the corner. Quake in. Hawk headlock. IRS in, He puts the boots on hawk. Hawk slam and nails a jumping fist. Bossman in now and he clobbers IRS. He gets the um splash into the middle rope.
Heenan: "He's standing on his tongue! Monsoon: "On his tongue? Its his tie!"
IRS grabs his briefcase and nails Bossman and pins him for 3 at 6:22.
Heenan: "he has a bad case of the losing"
LOD obviously are gonna win. Typhoon attacks Animal with knees and Quake and
him double team on animal. Belly to Belly Suplex for 2 by Quake. IRS with a
forearm off the top rope. Bearhug by Typhoon. Animal breaks free and hot tags
Hawk. Right hands by him on Typhoon. Diving shoulder tackle. IRS nails
Typhoon with the briefcase and Hawk pins him at 9:35. Quake gets pissed a
tI.R.S and walks off with Typhoon at 10:40 or so. Hawk & Animal work over
IRS. Hawk powerslam. Hawk bites buckle and gets tossed outside. Chinlock by
IRS Suplex blocked and Hawk with one. Animal in.
Shouldertackle. Powerslam.
Bossman forces a fleeing IRS to get back in the ring. Hawk clothesline off
the top rope finishes it at 15:20 with LOD being the survivors..
Mean Gene is in the basement with the Undertaker. More TIT pushing.
Mild Recommendation to Watch, unless you find Bobby Heenan annoying.
by Hollywood scorpion
Wrestling-A-Holic
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