It was six o seven in the morning hour.
The phone rang.
"Who's calling me at this time of day?" I muttered.
I answered the phone.
At the other end I heard my own voice.

"Just thought I'd call to wish us a good day!"
"Who is this?" I asked stupidly.
"It's me" said the voice.
"Me?" I said.
"That's right" came the reply.

Hmm.

"What shall we talk about?" my voice asked me.
I didn't know what to say.
I had been taught from an early age that talking to myself was not healthy.
"Don't know" I replied, then added, "What do you want to talk about?"
"Same thing as you." came the answer.

Hmm.

It's not as if there are a million things you've always wanted to say to yourself.
It's not like we ever think of taking ourselves somewhere
and giving ourselves a good talking to.
Here I was having a dialogue with myself.

Hmm.

"I'm not comfortable with this" I said.
"Why not?" laughed the voice, "Afraid I'll ask a question we can't answer?"
"Not exactly" I said, "It's just that we already know everything there is to know about each other."
"Speak for yourself." fired back the voice.
"I think you are!" I replied.

Hmm.

It dawned on me that this wasn't the first conversation I had had with me.
Many times I had scolded myself, congratulated myself, encouraged myself and questioned myself.
Many times I has asked, "How do I do this?"or "What do I do now?"

Many times I hadn't listened to myself.
I had done the opposite of what I had discussed.
Sometimes I had done the right thing, in spite of telling myself I was afraid to do it.
Sometimes it was better not to listen to myself. Was this one of those times?

Hmm.

"What exactly do you want?" I asked.
"Same as you." replied my voice on the other end of the line.
"Which is?" I asked.

The phone went dead.
"No!" I shouted.
I jumped out of bed to check the Caller I.D.
The only number on it was my own.
"Darn", I said, "How can I return the call now?"

I was suddenly anxious and afraid.
I was cut off from myself.
I had hung up on me at an important moment in my relationship.
I was mad at myself.

Hmm.

I never realized how important it was to keep in touch with myself
Until I was no longer there.