While I was in Houston I got together with all of my old friends.  I met Tessa and Kim at a mall in Galveston and while we hadn’t really talked in the past three years it was so nice to be around them again.  Bob and I hung out around our neighborhood for days.  We spent just about every moment together until he left to go on his vacation.  I saw Michael and Steven Hendershot for a little bit and was surprised to see how nice they became.  They were no longer the showoffs that they were in our youth; they had matured into great young men.  I met up with Steven Deatherage too while I was down there.  This was a bit awkward since the last time I saw him I couldn’t stand him.  We drove around for a bit and just healed some old wounds.  We talked about how odd it was to be there without Jessica.  I was able to leave Houston with a sense of closure.  I no longer craved my old life and I was ready to move onto the next adventure.

After I got back from Houston things with Brian were different.  We didn’t click anymore and I wasn’t having fun when we went out.  I realized that I didn’t love him anymore and decided that I needed to end the relationship.  This was hard for me since he had helped me so much with my Jessica ordeal.  I finally told him how I felt and he understood.  I was able to walk away from the relationship with a clearer sense of myself.  I found my own little niche without having to worry about a boy getting in the way.

*    *    *
The month of May was very difficult for me.  I felt overwhelmed by all the things that were going to happen in the next few weeks.  First I would be turning 18. Since I was a young child I counted the days till I was an adult. I would finally be able to buy cigarettes, get into clubs and legally leave my home and never return.  After that I would be graduating.  I was leaving the safety of high school and stepping out into the real world.  Here it didn’t matter if I did my homework or got to bed early. I was in change of my life.  What if I screwed it up?  Then there was the phone call.  Jessica said she was going to call me on my birthday.  How was that going to go?  What if things weren’t the same?  I was finally going to be able to talk to my best friend but what if she was a different person?  They were trying to change her in the program, what would I do if they succeeded?  I would be lost without her.

I needed some advice so I ran to Robert.  I met him at work and he always knew just what to say to calm me down.  He told me that we would get on the phone and scream “Oh my God” and things would go back to the way they always were.  He was right.  Jessica and I talked just like we always did and made plans to get together in two weeks.  She was coming up to Washington D.C. (which was only 4 hours away from me.)  We arranged to meet at noon in Union Station.  I was on such an emotional high I didn’t think I would ever come down.

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