Cryptorchid Chipmunk stuff you can buy (because I can't spell merchandise, or whatever that word is...)
you might want to go to the
informative CC page to buy stuff, cause my page sucks dick....
CDs!!!!!!!!
"Cryptorchid Chipmunk's Greatest Hits Volume 2" -- $5
Our first cd expressing a less inventive pop-punk style... only has guitar, drums, and bass
"Super Happy Fun Family Wish Demo" -- $5
Our second CD.... talk about a reflective piece of plastic that totally kicks ASS!! this is one.... only has 2 guitars, drums, bass, and horns
T-shirts!!!!!!!!
"Penis tank, crab vagina" -- $7
Has a penis tank with a guy in it that looks like mario being chased by a crab vagina, has checkered sperm outlining "cryptorchid" logo and says Cryptorchid above graphics and Chipmunk below... I'll eventually get a picture of it, it's been called our "adult" shirt, cause we can't sell it at some all ages venues (only printed on one side)
"Crazy chipmunk and checkers" -- $7
Says "Cryptorchid Chipmunk" has picture of demented chipmunk and checkered border on front, and has checkered boarder and "Buttrecords" and "cchipmunk.8m.com" on the back... you can wear this one in church...
Stickers!!!!!!!!
"Small spraying cock" -- $.25
Says Cryptorchid Chipmunk and has cchipmunk.8m.com very small in the upper right corner, and if you look at the name right, you'll see a hidden message... there's a picture of it on the informative CC page
and that's about all.......
so if you wanna buy it, send the money to...
Cryptorchid Chipmunk is really fuckin cool!
Rt 4 Box 49
Frametown WV, 26623
and of course a return address so we know where to send it, and
if you live really far away, how about you send us postage too. cool...
so are you going to buy it? are you sure? it's a good cd! i think you should buy it,
and i talked to your mom yesterday and she said that if you don't buy it she's
going to get a giant black dildo and ram it up your ass then make you eat it.
i tried to talk her out of it, but she says it's for your own good.
For the cheap-asses...
If you're too cheap to pay us $5 for the CD, you can also send us a blank CD (or $1, about the cost of a blank CD), and we'll burn a copy of it and send it back to you. This means you don't get the booklet of games and lyrics, or any of the graphical stuff that's involved, you just get a cd with the tracks on it. So now are you going to get it? It a free cd you stupid fucker, how could you turn that down?!?!? There's only one catch to this offer, when you get the cd, you must burn 5 copies of it and give it to other people who may like it. And send us some money (like a dollar) for postage or send us a self-addressed stamped envelope (preferribly a padded one so it will not be broken in transport).
