Remember to never split an infinitive. The passive voice should never be used. Do not put statements in the negative form. Verbs has to agree with their subjects. Proofread carefully to see if you words out. If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing. A writer must not shift your point of view. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction. (Remember, too, a preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.) Don't overuse exclamation marks!! Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is. Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing. Always pick on the correct idiom. The adverb always follows the verb. Last but not least, avoid clichés like the plague; seek viable alternatives. - William Safire's Rules for Writers  

I don't have a license to kill... I have a learner's permit. Unknown

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them? Unknown

The human side of medicine will always be kept foremost in all that is done - that in spite of the rapidly increasing technological trappings of hospital medicine, it will never be forgotten that in every patient there 
is a person. A. McGhee Harvey, MD 

"Ne mangez pas la neige jaune." (Don't eat yellow snow.)

Good service is like bacon and eggs. 
The chicken was involved, but the pig was committed. 
Be the pig. Cheryl Steen 

May you live all the days of your life. - Jonathan Swift  

Now that I'm here, where am I? - Janis Joplin  

All unauthorized personnel are, and shall remain so. - George Coates  

What we need gentlemen, is a completely brand-new idea that has been thoroughly tested. - Unknown  

Incompetence is a double-edged banana. - John Perry Barlow  

It ain't bragging if you can do it. - Dizzy Dean  

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. Oscar Levant 

Whenever I have to choose between two evils, I always like to try the one I  haven't tried before. Mae West 

If it's dangerous to talk to yourself, it's probably even dicier to listen. Jim Hightower 

Everything I did in my life that was worthwhile I caught hell for.  Earl Warren 

There is no substitute for incomprehensible good luck. sther Blumenfeld  

It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety. Isaac Asimov