Frogg42337's 2nd Journal
January 20-21
So it begins. I never meant to start writing journals to the site, but there's something different about this. Something slightly more satisfying with this....I somehow remain rather anonymous while people can read and respond to my thoughts and feelings that otherwise wouldn't be known.
I never thought of myself as crazy until tonight. Driving home late tonight from practice i realized how much my "sister" had actually hurt me tonight. I was delusional to think she'd never hurt me. I hurled her into my life and into my secrets or rather she knocked and I let her in without a warning. I should have warned her. This disease was something she had never known, never dealt with, yet here i am this new thing leering in her face like a monster. It takes so long for me to let anyone in...and so little to make me hide away like a hermit crab. I have been betrayed maybe or i'm the betrayer. Either way, she has her own life and i sense not being wanted. Ana,..`..dear ana has never left me. Though she causes me endless pain she is the one who never has abandoned me. Maybe i'm worthless. I feel like that...completely useless alone and destined to stay that way. Who in they're right mind would want me? I don't have an answer for that, i do know that my tears were wasted on loneliness.
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