This section deals with Footballing Trivia:
I dont know much about football or trivia,
But what I do know is worth its weight in horse manure:
Chelski... Whats going on? Zillions of £££££ of unlimited cash poured down the pan,
just to forge some cup winning side. But it stinks as far as i'm concerned.
I just remember
the good old days of my Chelsea supporting time, working class players one and all,
when Osgood would have to clean his
own boots, where Dave Sexton would stay overtime to sweep out the changing rooms. Even
the great Chopper Harris would mow the pitch before kick off. All this for just £16 a
week wages. That was the real world.
Working for one's art, for the love of the club, for the love of football.
Not that I begrudge present day players their big incomes, cos they deserve it. But the
idea that a benefactor can wade in and spoil it all. Ok, so it's happened before, with
yer Elton Johns and yer Alan Sugars etc, but this Chelski thing is too much, where
super wealth might grab all the prizes, and we have to pay extra for it at the turnstiles.
It makes me miss the mud and blood of those great
days, when Man U or Arsenal didnt always win, when star soccer players would get pissed
seven nights a week. Marvellous. And plenty of cheap stomach churning hot dogs and beer,
not just corporate hospitality. Even the fights and abuse was better then, thanks to
the good old terraces. No one like's us, we dont care.
(Jan 2004)
Fandom: What makes us attracted to a certain football team? Even more crucially, why do
I support both West Ham and Newcastle? Why did I used to support Chelsea? Why have I been
to Tottenham's ground more than any other? Look: why does it happen? I know I was
attracted to the glamour of Chelsea in the late Sixties. I remember reading that the team
wouldn't cut their hair unless they won the FA Cup. Thankfully for them, they won that
and about everything else within the next few years. I then I sort of lost faith. The
old team broke up. Things didnt have the appeal they once had. Fleeting Fandom, I trust
you'll agree. But whilst I loved them, my happiness revolved around their results. Its
a funny old game. In recent years, I do like a good story. Its only by story do I get
interested in a club. I dont know if its different to anyone else. Newcastle interested
me when they were bottom of the table, with that Mr nasty Rude Hullit in charge. It was
a brilliant story how they fought back from adversity, and I followed them ever since.
With West Ham, i'm a fool for Psycho Pearce, and loved watching him and his occasional
sendings off. Now with Di Canio, Sinclair, James, etc, the team is full of crazies who,
even when on losing streaks, are bloody entertaining. Its 10 May 2003 today. Will they
be relegated tommorow? I'll miss them. Always look forward to their feast of characters.
But what the hell, if you dont agree with my choice, then dont dispair. I'll probably
hook up with your team, if theres a good story in it, or the team is full of mad
eccentrics. Theres only one team i'll always support and wont change.
The love of my life and my country. Its called England.
(May 2003)
That Fat Bloke on The Premiership. No, not Andy Townsend, i'm refering to that dancing
Southampton fan they show on the credits. I noted that one Website calls him 'Steve Bull',
but thats quite uncomfirmed until ITV dare do a special on him, the one and only star they
have left. Strangely enough, theres an unusual lack of info on this bloated chap, the fans
seem to hate him for some reason, but I think he's got all the right moves, and could
teach some players some routines. Like Rio Ferdinand, for instance, when he scored in the recent World Cup. His celebratory dance was absolute pap. Bring on the
dancing fat bloke I say, to inject the groove into our players fumbling footwork.
(Jul 2002)
Over the years, i've seen TV presenters come and go, but nothing comperes to the panel
of pundits that did the 1970 World cup for ITV. The entourage that included Brian Clough
and Malcolm Allison remain unbeatable thanks to the strength of personality. Jimmy Hill
added a touch of headmastery, whilst Brian Moore remained the sensible anchor man. Since
then, its still been of high standard, what with yer Saint and Greavsies, but you cant
beat a winning team. Nowadays, the warmth of the Lineker/Hansen/Lawrenson outfit seems
to me to be a perfect grouping, especially compared to Des's dire troupe on the other
channel. The premiership prog's panel didnt work for me, and the brillaint Venables saved
it from going under. I could listen to him groan on for hours, but now he's gone to Leeds,
I feel the show may be unwatchable. As for commentators, i'll always miss the resonance
of Brian Moore. And co-commentators? I think big Ron is the Ultimate. That chap's hilarious and deserves a show of his own.
(Jul 2002)
Any excuse to show another shot of that scoreboard at Munich. Hey! I LOVE THAT SCOREBOARD!
But this rant concerns the lack of political correctness surrounding that event. Now, of
course, we all, without exception in the footballing supporters world, believe wholeheartedly in a spot of heavy duty political correctness. So what gives whenever dear
olde England play our old foes the Germans? The bestest tabloid headline, albeit shifted
and compressed into the corner of the front page, declared to the nation: "Dont mention
the score", when announcing a certain recent 1:5 event. Unforgettable!
On TV, some poor chap, fresh from
croaking some gospel-like pleasantries from the Munich terraces, boasted that: "This is
the greatest thing thats happened since the Second World War". Whatever did he mean? All
in all, this behaviour is quite shocking in this modern, tolerant society. Not since
England beat Jerry 'Hun-Nil' have I heard such deplorable lack of respect. This just has
to stop. I suppose one has to laugh though, and if we screw up in the world cup 2002,
there'll only be tears to look forward to. Still, memories... I just love that
scoreboard! (Feb 2002)
It really winds me up, so to speak, whenever they replay that Beckham sending off in the
world cup '98. I mean, the way that Argentinian chap barged Beckham to the ground
to start with was extremely brutal, and shown in context with the ensuing sending off
it makes some defence for his Beckhams actions. But the TV pundits never show this
section, cos it devalues the ritual that is written football history. Its pathetic to
see the sanctimonious waffle thats usually accompanying this yearly crucifixion, but I
doubt anyone wouldnt have reacted the same as Beckham, or worse. And it was obvious the
Argy took a wimpish dive as well, but the ref bottled out of sending him off too. What
a bloody travesty! I think this is an incident that should be fairly reviewed for once.
(Jan 2002)
Lets look at the old Scoreboard. Good game, good game.
Will England ever ever ever win another major trophy? I mean, there I am, year in, year
out, in my armchair, remote control on one arm, can of cheap lager on the other, and we
never bloody win anything. Admittedly though, that 1:5 incident in Munich was a damn
marvellous happening, but I would really like our chaps to be on top of the footballing
world where thay belong. And i'm sick to death of seeing all those other countries
do the bizness. After all, we invented the bleedin' game over here, they deserve to
give our boys a chance to win the World cup at least a few more times than we have. Its
only fair. What the bloody hells going on??? (Jan 2002)
When Gerrard Houllier (the Liverpool FC Manager, who incidentally is a french chap)
is interviewed about the UEFA Cup (which is usually pronounced 'YOU-AYE-FAH' if one
is english bred) our boy Gerrard refers to it as the 'You f*** up', which I thought was
hilarious. I suppose somebody had to. Maybe hes having the last laugh, playing the
role of Inspector Clouseau. Nevertheless, our boy Gerrard remains one of the English
Football Leagues most sustained and eccentric characters, in a word, completely out to
lunch. He's suffered a bit in the heart department as of late, so take it easy, monsieur,
it would be sad to lose you. (Dec 2001)
Whatever happened to the 'We want Venables' Campaign to reinstate olde 'El Tel' as
the england manager? Just cos Sveeden Sven is a genius and is winning everything that
no reason to ignore our all time favourite footballing pundit and
car-coat wearing cockney wit. Its just
no fun without him (and Gazza). Sometimes I think it would be much more fun going back
to not winning any matches but at least having that 'Used car salesman' as our frontma
and spokesperson. Lets face it, if Sven starts to fail us he's gonna be really cack
handed against the scum. He's hardly witticisms abound. Wheras our Tel might lead with
his head. Literally. At least he remains the saviour of TV's 'The Premiership' (Dec 2001)
Chelski... Whats going on? Zillions of £££££ of unlimited cash poured down the pan,
just to forge some cup winning side. But it stinks as far as i'm concerned.
I just remember
the good old days of my Chelsea supporting time, working class players one and all,
when Osgood would have to clean his
own boots, where Dave Sexton would stay overtime to sweep out the changing rooms. Even
the great Chopper Harris would mow the pitch before kick off. All this for just £16 a
week wages. That was the real world.
Working for one's art, for the love of the club, for the love of football.
Not that I begrudge present day players their big incomes, cos they deserve it. But the
idea that a benefactor can wade in and spoil it all. Ok, so it's happened before, with
yer Elton Johns and yer Alan Sugars etc, but this Chelski thing is too much, where
super wealth might grab all the prizes, and we have to pay extra for it at the turnstiles.
It makes me miss the mud and blood of those great
days, when Man U or Arsenal didnt always win, when star soccer players would get pissed
seven nights a week. Marvellous. And plenty of cheap stomach churning hot dogs and beer,
not just corporate hospitality. Even the fights and abuse was better then, thanks to
the good old terraces. No one like's us, we dont care.
(Jan 2004)
I support both West Ham and Newcastle? Why did I used to support Chelsea? Why have I been
to Tottenham's ground more than any other? Look: why does it happen? I know I was
attracted to the glamour of Chelsea in the late Sixties. I remember reading that the team
wouldn't cut their hair unless they won the FA Cup. Thankfully for them, they won that
and about everything else within the next few years. I then I sort of lost faith. The
old team broke up. Things didnt have the appeal they once had. Fleeting Fandom, I trust
you'll agree. But whilst I loved them, my happiness revolved around their results. Its
a funny old game. In recent years, I do like a good story. Its only by story do I get
interested in a club. I dont know if its different to anyone else. Newcastle interested
me when they were bottom of the table, with that Mr nasty Rude Hullit in charge. It was
a brilliant story how they fought back from adversity, and I followed them ever since.
With West Ham, i'm a fool for Psycho Pearce, and loved watching him and his occasional
sendings off. Now with Di Canio, Sinclair, James, etc, the team is full of crazies who,
even when on losing streaks, are bloody entertaining. Its 10 May 2003 today. Will they
be relegated tommorow? I'll miss them. Always look forward to their feast of characters.
But what the hell, if you dont agree with my choice, then dont dispair. I'll probably
hook up with your team, if theres a good story in it, or the team is full of mad
eccentrics. Theres only one team i'll always support and wont change.
The love of my life and my country. Its called England.
(May 2003)
Southampton fan they show on the credits. I noted that one Website calls him 'Steve Bull',
but thats quite uncomfirmed until ITV dare do a special on him, the one and only star they
have left. Strangely enough, theres an unusual lack of info on this bloated chap, the fans
seem to hate him for some reason, but I think he's got all the right moves, and could
teach some players some routines. Like Rio Ferdinand, for instance, when he scored in the recent World Cup. His celebratory dance was absolute pap. Bring on the
dancing fat bloke I say, to inject the groove into our players fumbling footwork.
(Jul 2002)
of pundits that did the 1970 World cup for ITV. The entourage that included Brian Clough
and Malcolm Allison remain unbeatable thanks to the strength of personality. Jimmy Hill
added a touch of headmastery, whilst Brian Moore remained the sensible anchor man. Since
then, its still been of high standard, what with yer Saint and Greavsies, but you cant
beat a winning team. Nowadays, the warmth of the Lineker/Hansen/Lawrenson outfit seems
to me to be a perfect grouping, especially compared to Des's dire troupe on the other
channel. The premiership prog's panel didnt work for me, and the brillaint Venables saved
it from going under. I could listen to him groan on for hours, but now he's gone to Leeds,
I feel the show may be unwatchable. As for commentators, i'll always miss the resonance
of Brian Moore. And co-commentators? I think big Ron is the Ultimate. That chap's hilarious and deserves a show of his own.
(Jul 2002)
But this rant concerns the lack of political correctness surrounding that event. Now, of
course, we all, without exception in the footballing supporters world, believe wholeheartedly in a spot of heavy duty political correctness. So what gives whenever dear
olde England play our old foes the Germans? The bestest tabloid headline, albeit shifted
and compressed into the corner of the front page, declared to the nation: "Dont mention
the score", when announcing a certain recent 1:5 event. Unforgettable!
On TV, some poor chap, fresh from
croaking some gospel-like pleasantries from the Munich terraces, boasted that: "This is
the greatest thing thats happened since the Second World War". Whatever did he mean? All
in all, this behaviour is quite shocking in this modern, tolerant society. Not since
England beat Jerry 'Hun-Nil' have I heard such deplorable lack of respect. This just has
to stop. I suppose one has to laugh though, and if we screw up in the world cup 2002,
there'll only be tears to look forward to. Still, memories... I just love that
scoreboard! (Feb 2002)
world cup '98. I mean, the way that Argentinian chap barged Beckham to the ground
to start with was extremely brutal, and shown in context with the ensuing sending off
it makes some defence for his Beckhams actions. But the TV pundits never show this
section, cos it devalues the ritual that is written football history. Its pathetic to
see the sanctimonious waffle thats usually accompanying this yearly crucifixion, but I
doubt anyone wouldnt have reacted the same as Beckham, or worse. And it was obvious the
Argy took a wimpish dive as well, but the ref bottled out of sending him off too. What
a bloody travesty! I think this is an incident that should be fairly reviewed for once.
(Jan 2002)
never bloody win anything. Admittedly though, that 1:5 incident in Munich was a damn
marvellous happening, but I would really like our chaps to be on top of the footballing
world where thay belong. And i'm sick to death of seeing all those other countries
do the bizness. After all, we invented the bleedin' game over here, they deserve to
give our boys a chance to win the World cup at least a few more times than we have. Its
only fair. What the bloody hells going on??? (Jan 2002)
is interviewed about the UEFA Cup (which is usually pronounced 'YOU-AYE-FAH' if one
is english bred) our boy Gerrard refers to it as the 'You f*** up', which I thought was
hilarious. I suppose somebody had to. Maybe hes having the last laugh, playing the
role of Inspector Clouseau. Nevertheless, our boy Gerrard remains one of the English
Football Leagues most sustained and eccentric characters, in a word, completely out to
lunch. He's suffered a bit in the heart department as of late, so take it easy, monsieur,
it would be sad to lose you. (Dec 2001)
the england manager? Just cos Sveeden Sven is a genius and is winning everything that
no reason to ignore our all time favourite footballing pundit and
car-coat wearing cockney wit. Its just
no fun without him (and Gazza). Sometimes I think it would be much more fun going back
to not winning any matches but at least having that 'Used car salesman' as our frontma
and spokesperson. Lets face it, if Sven starts to fail us he's gonna be really cack
handed against the scum. He's hardly witticisms abound. Wheras our Tel might lead with
his head. Literally. At least he remains the saviour of TV's 'The Premiership' (Dec 2001)