September 13, 1916
Santa Monica
Rose's house was on a beautiful street, where each house seems to stand on its own little hill like royalty. There were trees literally everywhere. The parlor was the first room when entering the house. The room was filled with very lively furniture. Comfortable tan leather couches, colorful rugs over the bare wood floor, and a large display case with pictures and books. The dining room was to the left of the parlor and the kitchen to the right. The stairs were wood and curved to the next level of the house. Up the stairs were four bedrooms; one was Rose's, one was Lizzy's, and the other two sat empty. She had occupied the house for three months. It was somewhat large for Rose and her daughter, but it was paid for by Cal. In the divorce settlement, Rose was entitled to none of his money, although he had reluctantly agreed to support Rose and his daughter. He had also employed a cook, a nanny, and a housekeeper. It was a large house, although nothing compared to size of her home in Philadelphia. In fact, the house was considered small in comparison to the others on her street.
The opulence of Rose's home simply stunned Jack; once again he was reminded of his place in society. Dinner was served at seven, and the table was alive with conversation. Lizzy was very taken by Jack, and through dinner Rose thought of the night on the Titanic four years before, when Jack had dined with her and her crowd. In those four years, Jack had changed very little physically. His hair was slightly shorter and his skin more tanned. In short, he was still a very attractive man.
After dinner, Rose took Lizzy to bed. Tucking her daughter into her small bed, Rose carefully turned on a small lamp on the cabinet beside her. The moon shone brightly through the large window and Lizzy gazed at it tiredly. Stroking her daughter’s black curls, Rose gently placed a kiss on her head. This brought Lizzy's attention back to her mother. Tears welled in her eyes; she thought of her father. She had not seen him for three months. Does he not love me anymore? her innocent mind thought.
“Good night, sweetie.” Rose smiled gently at her daughter. The lamp cast an orange glow in the room. Her daughter's face was so beautiful, and Rose could not remember what life was like not being a mother. The tears in Lizzy's eyes sparkled.”What's wrong?” Rose stroked her hair tenderly.
“When will Daddy be here to tuck me into bed?” The question hit Rose like a train. She closed her eyes and took a small breath, knowing that she would have to lie to her daughter. Cal would not be there to see his daughter to bed. He had left Rose to contend with her daughter’s questions without a second thought, and she could feel anger burning towards her husband.
“Soon, darling. He will be here.” A tear rolled down Lizzy's cheek and Rose's heart broke. How could Cal not wish to be here with his daughter? She was just a child. A child she thought was conceived out of love. Collecting herself together, Rose stood from the bed and rearranged her skirts.”Lizzy, don't cry for your father,” she said, snapping a little. She immediately regretted it, not wanting to instill any sort of hatred into her daughter.
Sitting upright, Lizzy pulled her shoulder length hair to one side and began to innocently play with the end of her plait.”Does he not love us anymore?”
Rose bent beside her daughter and took both of her small hands in her own.”Yes, he loves you, just like I do, darling.” Rose could feel the hatred for her husband building inside her. How could he just leave his child? She needed a father.
Lizzy nodded slightly, still weeping. Taking her daughter in her arms, Rose gently rocked her body back and forth, just as she did when she was a baby and she would nurse her to sleep. She fought tears herself. How could she lie to her daughter? But she knew she had to. She couldn't hurt her daughter. How could she tell Lizzy her father didn't love her, and never had? It was impossible.
Glancing at the small clock on the mantelpiece, Jack took another sip of his tea. 9:15 PM. Small and hesitant footsteps slowly descended the stairs and he turned his head slightly to see Rose. Immediately he stood, shoving his hands into his pockets. Slowly she came to face him, and then it was obvious she was crying. Tears stained her cheeks.”I'm sorry,” she apologized quietly. Not quite knowing what to do, Jack immediately placed his arms around her body. She offered no resistance and simply let him hold her. He shushed her and gently stroked her hair, the same fiery red it was years before. After a few moments, Rose moved away from his embrace and wiped her face.
“Are you all right?” Jack asked, a little hesitantly. He had no idea why she had been reduced to tears after the evening had been full of laughter. Rose did not answer right away. She went to the liquor cabinet in the parlor and poured herself and Jack a glass of wine. He said nothing as she handed it to him; he just gazed at her movement, her face, her hair–everything about her which captivated him.
“Jack, do you know the real reason why my husband isn't here?” she asked. It was a rhetorical question. She knew Jack did not know the reason.
“No, I don't.” Slightly hesitantly, Jack seated himself beside Rose on the leather couch.
Turning her face to him, a serious look fell over her face.”Because he is divorcing me.” She looked Jack straight in the eye. It was the first time she had told anyone that fact.
“Divorce? Rose, why?” Jack came closer to Rose. He placed his right hand on her shoulder and Rose placed hers on top of his. The smallest contact from him caused feelings to stir which she believed to have been dead and buried, the feelings which she had felt as a seventeen-year-old girl. Jack's face was concerned. He could not believe Cal would divorce her. In society, he thought divorce was seriously frowned upon.
“Because I never gave him a son,” Rose spoke truthfully.”In the last four years, I have lost two children, and now I may not be able to conceive anymore.” The words fell from Rose's mouth, the words which she had repeated in her own mind for months, driving her insane. She lowered her head, the reality of her own words hitting her. Immediately, Jack placed his arm around Rose in an attempt to comfort her in any way possible.”And now my daughter cries every night before she sleeps, wanting her father, a father who doesn't love her and never did!” Rose sobbed. Her body shook with anger.
“Oh, Rose,” was all Jack could say. Her body melted against his. He softly stroked her hair and Rose was surprised by how much she was comforted by him.
“How could he just leave his daughter? Lizzy is a beautiful child. She has done no wrong.” Jack touched Rose's face in an attempt to wipe away her tears.”No, but Cal wanted a son and heir. He never loved me; I was just the trophy wife and someone to bear his sons,” Rose said breathlessly.”I conceived Lizzy on my wedding night; I was just seventeen when I gave birth to her alone. I knew little of what sex was. The idea was romantic to me and I was a child myself.”
Jack had no idea of Rose's misery. He felt anger at Cal, the man who had kept him from contacting Rose on board the Titanic. If he had seen her, maybe he could have taken her away from the chains of the upper class. They could have come to Santa Monica years before and done everything they had spoken of aboard the Titanic.
“I thought of you the night I gave birth to Lizzy,” Rose confessed, her eyes meeting Jack’s. A serious look fell over her face, and she became lost in his deep blue eyes.”I held her in my arms and thought of you, of what you were doing, where you were.” Rose smiled through her tears.”But I knew I had to get you out of my head, because I had to be some sort of a mother to Lizzy and a wife to Cal.”
“Oh, Rose. I thought of you endlessly since the night we kissed onboard. I thought of attempting to contact you, but Cal would have seen to it that I was kept away. I thought you were going to be happy with him. He could give you a good life.”
Rose shook her head violently.”No. Not once was I happy. I lived a pretend life. My mother has disowned me, too; she is shamed that I will soon be a divorced woman. A young mother alone.”
“You will never be alone, Rose. You have Lizzy, and you have me now. I will always be here to help in whatever way I can.”
Taking Jack's words in, Rose nodded. She squeezed his hand slightly and he smiled that boyish smile at her. His gorgeous blue eyes sparkled in the dim light of the parlor. She could feel some sort of tension between them.
“I'm glad we have met again, Rose. The day after we kissed aboard, I came to try and find you, but Cal’s manservant kept me away,” Jack confessed.”I was going to tell you I had feelings for you.” Lowering his head, Jack laughed a little, realizing now how ridiculous he sounded.
“And I returned those feelings, Jack. That night was one of the best of my life,” Rose admitted unabashedly.
Exhaling air, Jack felt shocked. Rose was a stunning upper class lady who he had met twice, but he had known the moment they kissed that he had feelings for her. Perhaps love? The whole room seemed to disappear; Rose was the only thing which held his attention–her beautiful face and the full lips which curved into a smile.
“I still do have feelings for you, Rose,” Jack whispered. He knew how he felt, and wondered if the feelings ever went away. He felt like she was his soul mate, and that a strong force pulled him towards her. His palms were sticky and he felt somewhat nervous. For a few minutes, they simply gazed into each other's eyes, feeling connected. Ever so slowly, Jack leaned towards Rose and inched towards her face, his eyes not leaving hers until his mouth captured hers ever so slightly. Rose's eyes flickered closed, and she continued their kiss. Their bodies moved closer together and her hands ran down his back as he touched her face gently and then her hair. It was like heaven. The tension which was present between them all night was finally released. The kiss felt different than the first time they had kissed. It was more passionate, as if it had been something they had been waiting for all of this time.
Neither remembered how they climbed the stairs to Rose's bedroom, but they did. Lying in the bed, their hands explored each other's naked bodies. The experience was new to both of them. Jack had never been with a woman before. He felt emotions he had never felt before or even dreamt of in his life. As for Rose, even all of the nights with Cal had not prepared her for the experience of Jack making love to her. It was as if she had gone to heaven and then returned. As they lay in each other's arms, Rose began to drift to sleep peacefully, happy for the first time in a long time.
Jack lay with his eyes open, his arms wrapped around Rose's body. He smiled, feeling a sense of belonging, and he glanced over to see her sleeping. Gently, he kissed her cheek.”I love you,” he whispered before settling himself to sleep.
As he spoke those words, Rose's eyes flickered open wide, shining with unshed tears. Those three words she hadn't heard in such a long time–did he mean them? What did this mean now? Would they be together? Could he handle Rose and her daughter? Sighing heavily, Rose closed her eyes once again and waited for sleep to come to her.