Written by sabresrthebest
Based on some situations originated by James Cameron.
I was sitting in the first class
dining hall, listening to people drone on about nothing. It had been a
stressful day, I was tired, and now I had to sit through torture. I nodded at
various points in the conversation, inputting occasionally. Just when I thought
the evening couldn’t get anymore boring, I saw two men who could make anyone
smile--Fleet and Lee.
I laughed as I saw them trying to
be waiters, lugging out a huge tray of olives and cheeses. It was then that
Archibald Butt began to tell an awful story that could put anyone to sleep in
two minutes, even Lights when he had too much coffee.
"Hey! Watch the
corner!" Fleet exclaimed to his companion.
"Sorry. I’m new at this…hey!
It’s Kristen!"
"What? Where?"
Lee pointed in my direction.
"Get her attention!"
"With what? I’m not going to
scream her name!" Lee said.
"Give me an olive."
"No! Why do you--"
Too late. Fleet had taken the
olive and launched it towards me. Instead, it hit Archibald square in the back
of the head.
"What in the…?" he
asked, bewildered.
"You missed!" Lee
scolded.
"It’s not a water bomb! If
it is anything but a water bomb, I can’t throw it!"
"Oh, boo-hoo."
I tried hard not to laugh as
Archibald began to look around. I knew what those two were up to. I just didn’t
want to say anything. It was too funny to watch the high class crowd embarrass
themselves.
"Um…cheese me," Fleet
requested, holding out a hand, into which Lee dropped some cheddar. Fleet aimed
and fired, yet again hitting Archibald in the head. The dinner company began to
laugh. Andrews seemed to be laughing the hardest, and Archibald figured it was
him, so, taking some caviar, he placed it on a spoon and flung it. The fish
eggs narrowly missed Andrews and hit Lady Duff-Gordon.
"Uh-oh," Fleet and Lee
said in unison, taking the wise route and exiting before things had the chance
to get ugly.
I shook my head as they walked
away. Way to wimp out, guys, I thought. Lady Duff-Gordon was so shocked
at having fresh caviar all over her that she didn’t say anything. Sir Cosmo,
instead, took some mashed potatoes and launched them at Butt, who, in turn,
launched some back at Sir Cosmo. Molly Brown was laughing so hard, I thought
she was going to fall out of her chair, and I just sat there, watching the war
break out. Oh, I’ll have a few words with those two after this one. I
shook my head as I thought of what I would say, but I was called back to the
war when I heard a scream. My head snapped up to see Butt, standing up on his
chair with a handful of carrots, and Andrews ducking behind Cosmo. If society
ever found out about this, they would be disowned for sure.
"Take that!" Butt
exclaimed as the carrots flew all over.
"Give me that chicken!"
Before I knew it, a chicken was
being launched across the table. I even had to duck to avoid being hit by
chicken. By this time, Lady Duff-Gordon and Molly Brown were involved as well.
It was when Ismay entered that I
knew there would be some problems. He gasped at the sight in front of him.
Completely crazy passengers and a completely messy dining hall.
"Mr. Andrews, I--ah!"
Ismay exclaimed as he felt a cold liquid being poured on him.
"Enjoy the wine,
Bruce!" Molly joked before prancing away. I could’ve sworn I heard Ismay
growl, and he took a bottle of champagne from the ice and shook it for a bit
before aiming it and firing. Champagne went everywhere, covering everything and
everyone.
"This is the last time I
sail on one of your ships, Ismay!" Cosmo exclaimed upon being hit and
ultimately drenched.
"Oh, relax, Cosmo! This is
fun! Yahoo!" Andrews sang before running around like a maniac. I was
beginning to think some of the alcohol gone to his head.
Everyone else in the dining hall
had evacuated by this time, so I was like a fly on the wall in the event of the
century. Everyone was covered in food, and it was all thanks to our two
favorite lookouts. My thoughts were interrupted as, once again, screaming
reached my ears. This time, it was Ismay chasing Butt around, launching various
glasses at his backside. Every time Butt got hit, he screamed. I smacked my
hand up to my forehead and laughed.
"Right in the butt,
Butt!" Molly laughed.
In turn, Butt managed to throw a
plate at her. She ducked quickly, and it shattered against the wall behind her.
Surprised, she began throwing silverware, pretty much everything except for
knives.
Not long after, the head cook
came out and freaked.
"No! My dining hall!"
"Your dining hall? This is
my dining hall!" Ismay exclaimed regally before getting hit in the head
with another glass and falling to the floor, unconscious.
"All of you, out! You!
Officer, clean this mess up!" the cook ordered before slamming the door.
Everyone exited, stepping over Ismay. A few kicked it, and I was left with a
filthy room to clean.
Five Hours Later
I was humming an old tune
continuously as I continued to clean. My rag was almost worn through, and my
water was filthy, not to mention that I had only cleaned half the hall. My head
snapped around when I saw two familiar faces, the dynamic duo that started it
all, Fleet and Lee.
"You missed watch."
"I know that," I
responded, wringing out my rag.
"Well, why didn’t you come
up?"
"Because I have been busy
cleaning up the mess that you two made!" I hissed.
Five Hours After the Previous
Five Hours Mentioned
"Ugh…how much more do we
have to do?" Lee groaned, his arm motions becoming slower and slower.
"We’re done! It looks fine!"
"Nope. You still missed
something." I shook my head.
They both groaned.
"What?"
I nudged my head towards the
corner, and wedged, way up high, was an olive.
The End.