TITANIC CONTINUED
Chapter Ten
Jack continued to pour out his
feelings to Molly.
His last few comments were,
"I can't live without her. I just wish I had more to give her. I'm afraid,
though, that she's making a big mistake by wanting to waste her life with
someone like me. She could do so much better. Please, help me."
Molly sat and looked at Jack. Poor
dear, she thought. He really is in love with this girl.
Instantaneously, memories and
thoughts of the past began to flash through Molly's mind.
She saw Daniel's face, that
beautiful, crooked smile he always wore, and those thick eyebrows and chocolate
brown eyes. She remembered exactly the way his mouth formed the words I love
you...
"Are you all right?"
Jack asked in concern.
Molly snapped her head up,
opening her eyes and giving Jack a quiet nod.
"For a minute there, you
were really daydreaming—hey, are you sure you're okay?" Jack asked,
reaching across to touch her shoulder.
Molly Brown licked her lips.
"Jack, when I was young..." She stopped. Her cheery face had taken on
a serious, wry expression.
Jack looked at her
understandingly. "Please," he said. "Go on."
She shook her head as if she
couldn't believe she was doing this, yet she continued.
"When I was a young woman,
two or three years older than yourself, I was in love with a young man...his
name was Daniel." Her voice faded as she said the last sentence.
Jack decided not to push her. This
must be something she really needs to let out, he thought.
"He was a free bird, much
like you, without a care in the world. Well, we met and fell in love instantly.
My God, I haven't thought about him in..." She trailed off again.
"Listen, if this is...I
mean, you don't have to..." Jack stumbled sympathetically.
Molly shook her head. "It's
all right. I have to."
She cleared her throat and went
on. "Daniel was poor, as was I, but my family didn‘t approve of him. Well,
we saw each other secretly for nearly six months. I would sneak out to meet him
and, well, eventually I realized that I wanted to spend my life with him."
She didn't stop this time.
"He was stubborn. Jack, he told me that he would not, could not marry me.
We cared about each other so much...oh, Lord, how I cried. I tried convincing
him that I didn't care that we would get married without our families there to
witness it and then go on to live in a shack and struggle for probably the rest
of our lives. I didn't care about any of that, son, because I loved him."
She looked down. "He moved on without me. For so long I dreamed of him,
every night, dreaming he'd come back for me. He was the only man I ever loved.
If only he'd listened to me! I'd be with him today, and as happy as can
be."
Jack was shaking his head.
"No...no, he was right. Don't you see? That just proves he loved you,
Molly, He didn't want to take your family away from you. He knew you would be
unhappy!" Jack said forcefully.
"No. Why don't you
understand me? Jack, Rose has thought all this out just the way I thought it
all out back then. Understand that it's all worth it! When you love somebody,
you'd do anything for them, anything to make them happy, anything just to be
with them." She paused. "Do you love her?" The question was
almost a shout. "Because if you just think you do, and you really don't,
then I should not be telling you any of this. You and he--neither of you
understand anything! Anything!"
Jack still looked at Molly. Her
face was reddening right around the eyes, and he could see a hint of a tear in
the corner of her eye.
She took a deep breath of
frustration. "Son, all I can do for you is tell you what I think is going
on. My diagnosis. That's it. You don't have to do what I'm telling you, but let
me say, I've been there, done that. Listen to me, Jack, listen. Quit fighting.
I'm trying to help. Now, I can help you with this part, but the rest of it?
That's your area. Got it?" Molly rose, walked to a nearby coffee table,
and retrieved a handkerchief with which to wipe her increasing tears.
When she turned around, Jack
could see that the accusing look that had danced on her face a minute earlier
had turned into a look of pure concern.
"Do you love her?" she
asked quietly.
Jack looked down. I asked Rose
that very same question about Cal. Did she ever answer me?
"Wait a minute, now. What
about this?" Jack questioned. "What if she does love that Cal guy? I
mean, how can I be sure that she's not just using me to get out of this life,
this family? She hates it, you know. She'd do anything just to...but she's
afraid is what she is. She's scared."
Molly sat back down on the
cushioned chair, facing Jack. She shook her head slightly, and said, knowingly,
"You're afraid, Jack. You're the scared one here."
Jack knit his brows. "Me?
Afraid of what?"
Most of the redness in Molly's
eyes was gone. "Rose is the smart one here. She's no dummy, Jack. She's
not the scared one. It isn't easy living the way you do, son, but it isn't all
that easy living our way, either. Sure, we always have food sitting right in
front of us when we get hungry. We always have warm beds to come home to, and
money to spend and nice clothes to wear. But it isn't all peaches and cream. We
are forced to act all proper, dress up all nice and pretty every single day in
those damned uncomfortable clothes, go to society functions, talk right, never
cuss or yell too loud...we have no freedom at all. That's why you look around
this place and see all these uptight stuffs with their noses in the air.
Because they were raised to be exactly that way. Me? I was raised differently.
I don’t always like this lifestyle, but Daniel, he not only refused to offer me
a different one, but that man caused me to do the most stupid, stupid thing
I've ever done in my entire life."
"What?" Jack inquired.
"I let him go." she
whispered.
Jack stood up. His head ached and
his stomach growled. He hadn't eaten since lunchtime yesterday.
"So, what are you saying,
Molly? It isn't making all sense here. I mean, I'm beginning to understand a
little bit of it..."
He was cut off by Molly's strong
voice.
"Go to her, Jack. If it's
not too late, anyway. She knows she can do better than you, financially, that
is. But why is money so important, anyway?"
Jack had no response.
"This is what I believe in
my heart, Jack. I believe that God created this earth, and he cut people in
half and sent them to different ends of the world. These halves sometimes spend
their entire lives searching for their missing part. Sometimes, your other half
is right there in front of you, but you let stupid things get in the way. See?
So those people end up dying and never knowing what happiness was. When you
find the one, you’d better hold onto them. Oh, it hurts too much to have to
watch them go. Have I made myself clear? She loves you, Jack, or else she
wouldn't be willing, anxious to give up everything just for your love. That's
all she wants, Jack."
She got up and tapped her finger
against his head. "She's trying to show you that. But you're a stubborn
fool."
She turned around and sat back
down again, waiting to hear what Jack would have to say.
He just fidgeted speechlessly.
Molly sighed. "One last
thing--just one more piece of advice. You listening? If everyone would follow
this advice, the world would be a much easier place to live in."
Jack looked at her reluctantly.
The words came out in a loud
whisper. "Your heart is smarter than your brain, always. Listen to it,
Jack. I won't watch you and Rose make the mistake that Daniel and I made. I
won't. Now go." She turned around and walked to the bedroom, shutting the door
behind her.
For the first time since he was
fifteen years old, Jack cried.