Written by Buu Girl
Based on some situations originated by James Cameron.
Rose DeWitt Bukater sat in front
of the dressing table mirror, staring at her pale reflection. Her hair hung
loose in matted red curls, awaiting a brush. Her eyes were a mixture of fear,
sadness, relief, and confusion. She was still recovering from her accident
earlier that evening. She had come so close to escaping her suffocating life,
so very close. She puzzled over whether it was a good thing that Mr. Dawson had
convinced her not to jump from the ship, and that he had done her a favor in
saving her life when she slipped on her beaded dress. Part of her was
disappointed that she hadn’t just been left to fall. That part was growing
quieter and quieter as she thought.
Her thoughts were all of Mr.
Dawson and his apparent zest for life, despite being poorer than a dormouse. He
was traveling, seeing the world and living life as it came. He was free, and it
intrigued her. Her own life was laid before her like a formal banquet. The
further the Titanic sailed, the closer she was to becoming Cal’s wife. The
closer she was to being permanently trapped.
Rose opened her music box, and a
sweet melody filled the air. It reminded her of her childhood. She was groomed
to be a perfect bride for a rich aristocrat; she was taught everything a well
brought up woman should know and social etiquette was drummed into her from a
very young age. Despite this, she was still quite innocent of it all. When she
was younger she had no idea about the grand plans her parents schemed for her.
This innocence was conveyed through the gentle chimes of the music box.
Rose picked up her hand mirror.
She looked at her reflection closely.
She was seventeen. She was hardly
out of her childhood and yet she felt so old at that moment. So weary, as
though by knowing her future she had no need for energy and enthusiasm.
However, as soon as she thought of the lower class man who had saved her, she
felt and saw her cheeks brightening, and something sparkled in her eyes.
Rose heard a knock at her door.
She wiped the mirror and gently placed it back onto the dressing table, looking
into the larger mirror in front of her to see who was entering.
Caledon Hockley stood in the
doorway. As the door opened, he leaned against the frame casually.
"I know you’ve been
melancholy," he said gently, almost lovingly, fitting in quite well with
the still tinkling music box. "I don’t pretend to know why," he
continued.
He entered the room, leaving the
door open behind him.
Cal walked over and pushed the music
box out of the way, sitting down on the dressing table. The music halted
abruptly, the reminder of her innocent childhood gone, bringing Rose’s thoughts
back to harsh reality.
"I intended to save this
until the engagement gala next week, but..." He sighed, flipping open a
grayish black box and revealing the most beautiful necklace Rose had ever seen.
It was a fascinating shade of blue and was glittering with a diamond chain. Cal
continued, pleased that Rose was so taken aback. "I thought that tonight…"
he trailed off, as Rose reached out at the necklace.
"Good gracious!" she
gasped.
"Well, this is a reminder
of…my feelings for you." Cal grinned, a superior grin.
Still in shock, Rose asked if the
necklace could possibly be a diamond, but Cal cut her off. He leapt from the
table and, grinning with pleasure, he placed the necklace around his fiancée’s
exposed neck.
"Fifty-six carats to be
exact," he explained. "It was worn by Louis XVI. They called it Le
Coeur de la Mer…"
"The Heart of the
Ocean," Rose translated, interrupting her fiancé, who seemed to assume she
had no knowledge of French. He affirmed her translation.
Rose was in awe of the diamond.
It was so lavish, such an expensive gift. Her mother would have kittens if she
knew that Cal had given her such a token of affection.
She could not help but wonder at
his reason for giving it to her. A reminder of his feelings for her. Did he
love her this much? Or was he buying her with lavish gifts? Rose could not
tell, but she was fascinated by the blue diamond. She touched it slightly with
the tips of her fingers, half thinking that it would disappear and be her
imagination. Cal held her eyes in the reflection of the mirror. She stared back
at him.
"It’s overwhelming,"
she said in a rather unenthusiastic voice. As amazing a gift as this was, her
melancholy refused to let her become more animated. She was feeling quite
uncomfortable, and not just by the heavy, expensive diamond around her neck.
Cal’s stare made her feel somewhat fearful. She looked back to the diamond.
"Well, it’s for
royalty," Cal answered matter-of-factly. "We are royalty, Rose."
Surprised, Rose looked back to
Cal’s stare. It seemed quite arrogant to class oneself as royalty. His family
was wealthy. They were aristocratic, yes, but there were certainly not royalty.
Cal moved closer. He leaned on
the dressing table, staring intently once more.
"You know…there is nothing I
couldn’t give you, Rose."
Rose felt sure he was wrong. She
was sure he could not give her freedom and happiness. She was sure he would not
respect her as an equal. He was not talking of feelings, though. She knew he
was talking of materialistic goods.
"There’s nothing I’d deny
you."
She’d be denied a voice. Denied
choice in her life. He chose her meals, decided whether or not she could smoke.
He even said he would mediate what she read after her outburst at lunch. She
looked at him, waiting for the but or the if.
He turned from the mirror and
looked at her directly.
"If you would not deny
me."
He stared at her, his eyes
imploring her for something. He was like a gentleman-beast. His eyes scared
her. Outside, he held composure, but his eyes showed he was some sort of animal
inside. The heat emitting from his dark eyes was intense. It was lust. It was
desire. It was conveyed in such a way that he was not even asking. He was
telling her silently that he deserved some sort of reward.
"Open your heart to me,
Rose," he continued, his arm on her shoulder, nudging her slightly. Rose
was filled with uncertainty and fear. He had just given her this gift, this
lavish, expensive, almost romantic gift. She began to feel like she did owe
him. She looked back in the mirror and her hand covered the blue diamond heart
around her neck. She slowly moved her hand up along the chain until her hand
was stretched around her throat, as though she were going to choke herself. The
feeling of entrapment set in once again.
Cal, oblivious to her inner
turmoil, leaned in and moved his lips onto hers. She was expecting it. She was
dreading it, but guilt made her defenseless. She could hear her mother’s voice
echoing in the back of her mind.
"We need Cal and the fortune
your marriage will bring. If you don’t marry Cal, we are going to be destitute.
Do what Cal says. Better to let him have you than to have us end up in the
poorhouse with you making our money by being a streetwalker, God forbid."
Cal lifted her up, kissing her
deeply. She hardly returned the kiss. She was too fearful and in too much inner
turmoil to react. Cal seemed not to notice.
He carried her over to her bed,
placing her down and breaking the kiss. His eyes were full of lust. Rose tried
to reason to herself. Cal was a good man, wasn’t he? He was a little arrogant,
but he did care for her, didn’t he? Maybe she cared for him. Maybe this was
what love was? Her mother never showed any particular outward affection for her
father when he was alive. Maybe, Rose thought, her own relationship with Cal
was the same?
Cal began to undress himself, and
he pulled Rose’s white nightdress over her head and stared for a moment at the
curls of red hair that cascaded down over her shoulders and mingled with the
beautiful diamond necklace, resting on her pale silken skin.
His hands roamed her body; Rose
closed her eyes and let him get on with it, feeling hot and bothered but not
happy. She realized that she was going to lose her virginity before her wedding
night. Quite often she had wondered what it would be like, but never had she
imagined this. She’d expected some sort of pleasure, but she was feeling only
dread and guilt. Cal kissed her and was beginning to get quite flustered. He
was panting between kisses.
"Rose, are you ready?"
Cal panted, his eyes misted with desire. He hardly paid attention to her unsure
nod. She could not summon words. She clenched the bed sheets as tight as she
could and steeled herself.
He entered her, causing her pain
but hardly noticing as he moved around inside her and began his thrusting. Tears
escaped from Rose’s tightly closed eyes. It was unbearable. She felt like she
wanted to scream, like she could release all the pent-up anger, frustration,
and sadness in one go.
She did scream, but into Cal’s
shoulder as he groaned loudly, collapsing atop her. He believed it to be a sign
of her contentment. She was grateful her ordeal was over.
Cal pulled out of her and rolled
from on top of her. She turned away from his naked form, ashamed of herself and
quite sure now that she felt no affection for him. She had given away her
virginity to a man in return for a fifty-six carat diamond. She felt as though
she were one of those streetwalkers her mother often talked about Rose becoming
in their desolation. She let more tears roll down her cheeks as Cal dressed
himself and sat down on the bed.
"Do you not feel better now
for opening your heart to me, Rose?" he asked, grinning.
Rose said nothing. She stared at
him almost soullessly. He seemed not to notice, or if he did, he ignored it.
"You’d best not wear that
necklace all the time. Not with lower class ruffians aboard ship."
Once again, thoughts of Jack
Dawson sprung into Rose’s mind. A reminder of the freedom she now could not
have. She had tied herself to Cal by giving her body to him. Her mother would
not let her escape the match now, not now that Cal held the DeWitt Bukater
reputation in his grasp.
Cal leaned over Rose’s naked body
and unclasped the necklace before placing it in its box. He kissed his fiancée
on the forehead and left, taking Rose’s dignity with him.
Rose cried into her pillow that
evening before resolving to get wrapped up and order a bath to cleanse her
dirtied body.
She was not in love with Cal, but
needed him now. She had not opened her heart to him, however. She reserved her
heart. She almost wished that she were back out on deck above the choppy, icy
waters. She wished she was back with the only man who had ever treated her like
a person, not an object. When she returned to bed that evening, her thoughts
were not of the man who had just taken her innocence from her, but of the man
who would, unbeknownst to her, in the future return it to her.
The End.