EVERYTHING’S NOT LOST
Chapter Twenty-Seven
The panic had now set in. The
band continued to play, but nobody was listening. Harry had managed to pull me
through the crowd and towards the nearest lifeboat, where Lightoller was
fighting the crowd. I could hear Will yelling in the background to some other
officer, but his voice sounded so far away…I looked around me, and everyone had
the same look on their face: everyone thinks they’re going to die.
"Get those oars in place!
Get an oar under it!" Will shouted. Looking over my shoulder, I see him
trying to get a lifeboat from a higher level of the ship down onto the deck, so
it could be filled. "Hold it!" he instructed. "Hold it!"
The boat crashed onto the deck and everyone jumped. He then ran to what looked
to be a hidden staircase to the lower levels and he had to stop himself before
turning back to the men. It must be flooded or something, for he looked as pale
as a ghost. "Get these davits cranked in! Let’s get the falls up!"
I turned back to Harry when he
squeezed my hand, going around the crowd and towards Lightoller—who pulled out
a gun and pointed it towards the pushing crowd.
"Keep order here!" he
yelled to the crowd, pushing them away from the ledge of the ship. "Get
back! Get back!" I heard a scream and a woman actually got pushed
overboard, near the filling lifeboat, now dangling from it. "Hold onto
her!" He shouted to the level of people below us. "Pull her in!"
The people on the lifeboat are frightened out of their wits and a lower-class
officer on the lifeboat took out what looked to be a white piece of wood,
trying to stop men from jumping onto the boat.
"Get back, I say, or I’ll
shot you all like dogs!" Lightoller threatened. Everyone immediately
calmed down, as the gun all faced them. "Keep order here!" He took in
a deep breath. "Keep back, I say!" He suddenly turned to us, looking
almost shocked to see us. "Miss Andrews," he said softly. I managed a
nod. "Mr. Lowe," he said, having regained his composure, gesturing to
Harry, "Man this boat." Harry nodded as Lightoller filled the empty
revolver with bullets from his coat pocket.
"Get on first," he said
to me, his hand still in mine. He whistled to one of the officers on the
lifeboat and he took my hand, helping me aboard. Harry climbed on after me,
hanging onto the ropes that would lower the boat down, hopefully soon. I sat
down with him to my right, in the second row to the front. I don’t think I’m
going to jump back on any time soon.
"Right!" Harry said to
the passengers on the still almost-full lifeboat, "Is everybody alright?
Nobody panic!" Is he serious? I looked back to the deck and Lightoller is
still struggling to keep the crowd under control. He yelled for Will and he
came running. I suppose they need someone else for crowd control.
"Stop pushing!" Will
yelled as he held back the crowd with Lightoller. Two or three men actually
fell overboard and into the water at that point, splashing cold water
everywhere. Sea spray hit my face and made a shiver go down my spine.
"Can’t you give us a chance
to live, you limey bastard!?" shouted an Irish voice. A passenger, it has
to be. Will pulled out his gun and held it to the crowd, just as Lightoller had
done. He’s shaking more than he should be while holding a gun.
"I’ll shoot any man who
tries to get past me!" he threatened over Lightoller’s yelling voice.
"Now, get back!"
"Bastard!" the same
obnoxious passenger yelled.
"Any more women and
children!?" Lightoller yelled, gesturing to the boat. When are we going to
lower? Do they want to fill the boat up completely—Let’s hope so. I glanced at
Harry, who looked just as confused as me. Looking under me, at the level below
us, people were touching the bottom of the lifeboat, as if they were ready to
climb in. I never wanted to admit this, but I am right now: I’m frightened.
That’s when I heard the gunshots.
I looked back up to the deck and
I saw two men laying dead in front of the large crowd, everyone’s jaws dropped
in shock. Lightoller stopped and Will began to back up, just as the blood from
one passenger wearing a lifejacket, the one who called him a bastard, was
trailing down Titanic’s deck. Smoke rose from Will’s gun. Did he shoot at them
or was it just an air shot—to get everyone to calm down? Or did Lightoller
shoot them?
Will looked at the gun in his
hand as he continued to back up, towards the ledge of Titanic, near Harry and
I. What’s he doing? Another officer getting rope to our right, probably for a
lifeboat, glanced over his shoulder at Will. He didn’t notice. Will looked at
the crowd again, glanced at Lightoller, before turning his gaze to me. I
managed a smile at him, unsure of what else to do. He looked away from me and
saluted everyone, before putting the gun to his head. No, no—He’s going to kill
himself! No, not tonight! Not now, he couldn’t—
"WILL, NO!" I screamed,
standing and leaning over the lifeboat’s edge. But, the gun went off and he
back-flipped into the North Atlantic with a large splash. Oh. My. God.
"Ann, sit back down,"
Harry’s voice quivered as he placed a hand on my shoulder, pushing me back into
my seat. There was this silence on the deck and it seemed to last for an
eternity. William Murdoch, woman-less Will, had shot himself. He’s dead. And
he’s not coming back. Harry glanced down at the water, but I can’t move. I
watched as Lightoller paused before returning back to the crowd.
"Now, stand back, damn
you!" he yelled angrily. "Get back! Damn you!" Another crash
occurred on the deck. It was yet another lifeboat trying to be taken down from
a higher level of the ship. Harry gazed around us before nodding at two men who
were near the levelers and pulleys that would bring us down.
"Take us down!" he
shouted. What is he talking about? There’s more room! Maybe a seat or two may
not seem like a big deal, and I suppose it’s not—since the Titanic is merely
tilting more and more with each passing second—but that’s someone’s lifeline!
The boat began to lower without anyone’s command and as we hit the second
open-level of the ship, people began to attempt to climb in. Everyone on the
lifeboat was trying to push them off, except for me. I can’t move. I watched as
Harry tried to take control of the situation.
"Sit down!" Harry
instructed to people on the lifeboat before turning back to the people still on
Titanic. "Wait! Stay back, you lot! Just stay back!" Two gun shots
went out into the ocean and everyone ducked. People who had tried to rush the
boat had backed off immediately. Harry did that!
"HARRY, STOP IT!" I
screeched at him. "You’re going to kill somebody!" He looked over at
me, what I had said, I think, sinking in, for he placed the gun back into his
coat pocket—where it belonged.
The lifeboat continued to lower
and before I knew it, we hit the water with a slight splash as the ropes that
had brought us down were unhooked. The other officers sitting among us pulled
out oars and began to row away from the ship. People continued to drop like
raindrops off of the ship and near us, but no one tried to climb aboard. The
gunshots had scared away anyone who thought they could just jump onto the boat.
I shut my eyes as tightly as I could—Will’s body was around and I don’t think
my heart could take any more pain. Not tonight.
"Alright, let’s row! Come
on, there’s no time to lose!" Harry shouted to the other officers, taking
a seat on the ledge of the lifeboat, still beside me. "One-hundred and
fifty yards, row!"
I glanced back up at the deck as
we slowly but surely got away from the sinking ocean liner. I could see how
tilted the ship actually was—It looked as though it was just ready to be sucked
in by the sea. I took in a sharp breath, bringing my coat and my father’s
closer to me. It was the only thing I have of him. People are still screaming,
the band’s still playing, and one more firework went up into the sky. Everyone
oohed and awed at them, but that must’ve been the last—for that was the last
firework that lit up the sky for minutes. This is all too unreal, this can’t be
happening.
"Bye, Daddy," I
whispered.