EVERYTHING’S NOT LOST
Chapter Forty-Three
The Waldorf-Astoria Hotel. Its’
located on Fifth Avenue in New York City, and is probably one of the stuffiest
hotels I have ever been in. Then again, this is New York—everything is either
for royalty or for the slums. As it is, I was lucky to get this information out
of Harry on the way to the hotel via taxi cab. He refused to say a word, until
I threatened to throw my engagement ring out the window. Then and only then did
he tell me where we were going.
I know the history of this place.
Even though I’ve never been, I remember my father discussing it one night over
dinner. I think he said the whole project started out as two hotels. I remember
him distinctively saying one hotel belonged to John Jacob Astor…God rest his
soul. I wonder if he survived, but then again…first-class men were never
allowed on the lifeboats. And trust me, I remember that much. Either way, one
hotel was open by his cousin, the other by him. I guess his cousin ended up
building the hotel next to a family member’s home and so on and so on. I
suppose it doesn’t really matter, but it seems pretty coincidental that a
Titanic passenger built the hotel that is now being used to investigate the
disaster.
Going up the elevator towards the
room the man at the desk told us to, I barely uttered a word. I have to learn
how to walk with these crutches eventually, and it’s a lot harder than it
looks. I’m keeping my concentration on that task. Harry kept eyeing me, making
sure I didn’t fall and he practically kept his right arm wrapped around me the entire
time we had to walk. He joked that he could carry me, and I almost put him up
to the offer, but decided against it. I should only be like this for a few
weeks, and then I’ll be able to walk again. I don’t want to break the man’s
back.
We followed the chatter when we
left the elevator to the end of a long, carpeted hallway—a hallway with
white-washed walls, and little lit lanterns, even though the sun was shining
through the windows. It looks a lot like Titanic’s interior, first-class. I
refused to let my mind wander back that far…but it looked like the hallway
Harry and I had run through to get away from Ismay, where I had found that
little boy, where my father told me it was time to go. I shook my head of the
thought, glancing quickly into the room where we stood to the far right. Rows
and rows of pews filled the room, it looks to almost be a church, but maybe
it’s not. Maybe they’re just chairs. My eyesight is awful, I know.
"We on time?" I asked
Harry as we stopped our walking. I leaned against the doorway, and also on the
crutches for support. He looked down at his watch, nodding.
"And with five minutes to
spare!"
"Hey, Ann! Lowe!"
Coming out of one of the rows of seats was Molly Brown, with Officer Charles
Lightoller behind her. She had this enormous smile on her face and so did
Lightoller. She ran towards me and when she reached me, she wrapped her arms
around me into a tight hug—as if we were long-lost classmates. "Oh, how
are you?" she asked, with a smile. "Besides the crutches, that is.
Hurt yourself already?" I nodded, admitting defeat.
"Dumb area carpets," I
said, rolling my eyes as Molly hugged a startled Harry. "But, I’m alright.
You?" Oh, I’m better than alright! I’m grand!
"Never better!"
"Hello, Antoinette,"
Lightoller said, tipping his hat to me after shaking hands with Harry. I
managed a smile.
"Hi."
"So, what did you do?"
Molly asked, gesturing to the crutches. "Break your foot, break your leg,
what?"
"Sprained my ankle."
"Did that hurt or
what?" Lightoller asked, with a small smile.
"Oh, it hurt." I
brushed a few strands of hair from my eyes and that’s when Molly whistled,
taking my hand unexpectedly.
"And what’s this we have
here?" she asked me, pointing to my engagement ring. "Look at this
beauty!" she said to Lightoller, nudging him before gesturing to my ring.
I glanced at Harry, who was turning a deep red. She whistled as Lightoller took
my hand, moving it back and forth to get a good look at the diamonds. He
whistled himself, impressed.
"Well, look at that!"
he laughed, slapping Harry proudly on the shoulder. "About damn time, my
friend! About damn time!"
"Charles—"
"She’s perfect for you!
Keeps you on your toes! Never seen a woman in my life play poker the way this
one does—"
"Poker?" Molly
interrupted, raising an eyebrow. Lightoller bit his lower lip, as if he knew
the jig was up. She laughed, slapping him on the arm. "Oh, I’m kidding!
I’ve always been a card girl myself." She then gestured to Harry, pointing
to my hand, which she was still holding onto with a tight grip. "Well,
Officer, you’ve got good taste." She glanced at me. "My husband would
never buy me something like this."
"He doesn’t realize how good
he has it," I smiled. It’s true. Margaret Brown is lively, vivacious,
she’s a wonderful woman. She’s someone who isn’t phony, she’s just who she is
and if you’ve got a problem with it, well, that’s just too bad.
"Ann said the same
thing," Harry said, "I thought it was nice." He shrugged,
sticking his hands in his coat pockets, as if he was still embarrassed.
"Oh, Hell, it’s better than
nice!" Lightoller laughed. "I’ve never seen so many diamonds in all
my life." I suppose he hasn’t ever seen or met the Countess of Rothes. The
diamonds that woman has—incredible. I love my ring, either way. I looked down
at it and it seemed to gleam back up at me. Harry picked it out for me and only
me. It’s something I will always cherish. "Plus, Harry, she’s
beautiful—"
"I get it, I get it!"
Harry laughed. "I lucked out!"
"You two want cigars so you
can brag outside?" Molly asked, squeezing my hand. "Either way,
Antoinette." She turned back to me. "The ring’s absolutely beautiful.
Just don’t let him go cheap on you after you two get married." If she only
knew how much he has already bought for me, how much he’s already spoiled me…I
don’t need anything. I laughed at her comment, merely because of the way she
said it. She was dead-serious. "You two are going to be happy."
"I hope so," I
admitted. I have no doubts.
"Well, if Officer Lowe here
could get you out of that shell of yours, he deserves to marry you!" She
laughed, probably recalling her unsuccessful attempt to try to get me to talk
to her—when I first met Harry. "You sure you didn’t keel over when he
proposed?" she kidded.
"That was before," I
reassured her. I was surprised, sure, but I didn’t keel over. Thankfully, I was
sitting. If I hadn’t been, I might’ve fallen over. Actually…I was very
surprised, but how could I say no to him? He was the one man I truly could
imagine spending the rest of my life with.
"Either way, congratulations
to you both!" Molly said, with a smile.
"Yes, congratulations!"
Lightoller agreed. "So…" His voice trailed off, "when are you
two lovebirds getting this all legalized?" He leaned against the doorway
of the room we all should be in by now, in eager anticipation. I glanced at
Harry, who still looked beet red and we both began to speak, but stopped. We
chuckled to each other at that, but in reality…I shrugged.
"I have no idea," I
admitted.
"As quick and as painlessly
as possible would be your best bet," Molly said, with a sturdy nod.
"Engagements shouldn’t be long."
"Well, what if I get sick of
him?" I asked her, before beginning to laugh. She smiled and Lightoller
began to laugh.
"If you get sick of him,
I’ll marry you," Lightoller promised, holding out his hand in offering.
"Why, thank you—" I
went to take his hand as a joke, but Harry grabbed me, wrapping his arms around
me tightly, squeezing me.
"Charlie, I don’t think
she’d ever be that desperate!" he laughed to Lightoller.
"Well, she agreed to marry
you…And besides, I think Antoinette Lightoller has a nice ring to it!" he
exclaimed, howling in laughter.
"Well, I think Antoinette
Lowe has a nicer ring to it!" At that point, we were all roaring with
laughter. Harry had a good way of hiding it, though—he merely hid his fits of
happiness into my shoulder and into my hair. I hope he doesn’t poke his eye out
with that hair comb.
"Harry, you’re going to make
my sprain my other ankle!" I managed to say between my giggles as he held
onto me, tighter than before. We shouldn’t be laughing this early, we shouldn’t
be laughing when we’re all here about something serious, but I can’t help it.
Harry has a lock on me, as if he thinks I’m going to throw my engagement ring
out the window and crutch off with Charles Lightoller…into the sunset. Never. I
love Harry too much.
"Alright, alright,
children!" Molly laughed, stepping between Harry, Lightoller and myself to
stop a comical brawl. "Either way," she said, clearing her throat,
"it’s nice to know something pleasant came of Titanic. Isn’t it?" She
shot a look at Lightoller, who nodded. I tensed up at the sound of Titanic. Oh,
Titanic—I try to put that damn ship out of my mind for merely a moment and I
just, I just can’t. My father’s Titanic. Harry must’ve felt my shoulders tense
up, for he put his cheek to mine, pulling me out of any thoughts of that
ship—before kissing me on the cheek.
"Why don’t we go
inside?" he suggested into my ear. "Make sure we have somewhere to
sit?" He shot a look at both Lightoller and Molly. She glanced at me,
heartbroken—as if she had struck a chord. It’s not her fault. It’s not anyone’s
fault. Well, no, I’m lying. I blame Bruce Ismay for this whole catastrophe, the
alcoholic.
"Everyone here for the
Titanic Inquiry, please take your seats!" shouted an unfamiliar voice. We
all glanced into the room and standing towards the front looked to be a very
well-dressed man, a Bible in his hand. "You four coming in?" he
yelled, agitated, gesturing to us. Of course, everyone already seated felt the
need to glare at us suspiciously and there was some light muttering. We all
managed a slight nod and began our way in. The back row was the only one that
wasn’t taken, so Molly, Lightoller, myself and Harry took our seats, in that
order. Harry helped me sit and now, what am I supposed to do with these
crutches?
"Here, Love," Harry
said, holding out his hands for them, "Let me have them." I gave them
to him and he took my crutches, strategically leaning them against this empty
chair, to his right. "How’s that?"
"Fine."
"Guards, shut the
doors!" This man really wants to take charge. I think he actually
considered locking us all out. I glanced over my shoulder and two uniformed
police officers were shutting the doors that we had just gone through. They
stood together, where the doors met, now crossing their arms over their chest.
"Hello, ladies and gentlemen," the man at the front of the room said,
clearing his throat. "Can everyone hear me?"
There were nods unanimous across
the large room as his echoed voice faded. I looked about me. Behind whoever
this man was, was what looked to be a desk and then to either side of him, were
more desks. Every chair was occupied. And now, looking through the crowd, I can
see some of Titanic’s surviving officers, in their uniforms, along with people
who must’ve been on the ship. I merely suggest this because their eyes all look
sunken in and look just as sad as I am.
"Okay, then." The man
pointed to himself. "I am Senator William Smith. We are here to inquire
and investigate the Titanic disaster…" I rolled my eyes, tugging on
Harry’s sleeve.
"Iceberg, anyone?" I
whispered into his ear. He hid his impending laughter, but smiled. It’s not
funny, I know, but this is absolutely ridiculous. There was an iceberg. Titanic
hit the iceberg, a lot of people died and that was it. A lot of people. I
sighed, holding back my tears. A lot of people, a lot of people I didn’t know,
a lot of people I did know. My father. Will. Henry Wilde. Captain Smith.
Titanic’s brave crew and even the passengers, no one deserved to die that way.
It was too cold, an awful way to leave this world. It wasn’t right.
"I will not take any
shenanigans or speaking during this inquiry!" the Senator shouted angrily,
eyeing me. Harry looked down at me and his eyes widened. We both tried not to
laugh, but straightened up, to make it seem like we were listening. We’re not.
Harry fixed my ring meticulously, managing a smile at me before taking my
hands. "Now that I have everyone’s attention, let me say how much I appreciate
all of the people who came to testify." Well, nobody had a choice, you
idiot, you subpoenaed everyone. "I know how many of you want to just
return home and be with your families, so let’s try to make this as painless as
possible." He doesn’t care. And why should he? He doesn’t know. He wasn’t
there. I watched intently as this Senator retrieved a folded piece of paper
from his pocket. He unfolded it quickly and straightening it, he looked about
the crowd. "The first witness I’d like to call to the stand is Mister
Bruce Ismay."