ONLY HALF THE MAN I USED TO BE
Chapter Twelve
Rose and Jack were sitting,
looking out onto the ocean. There were now only a few hours left until they
reached land.
"Rose," a voice behind
them said. It was him again. Cal.
"Can’t you learn when to
leave a lady alone?" Jack asked him sharply.
"I don’t believe I was
talking to you," he said. "Rose, it’s about your mother."
"What about my mother?"
she asked sharply. Rose might now hate Cal; in fact; she always had. She might
have disliked, even hated her mother at times, as well, but that didn’t stop
her from being her mother. Rose still cared.
"She’s been taken ill,"
he replied, forcing a pained look across his face.
"How ill?" Rose asked
worriedly.
"She doesn’t look it, but
the doctor said it could be only days," he said.
"Oh, Lord," Rose whispered.
Jack could see the scared look on her pale face. He knew that she couldn’t
stand Cal, or he hoped so, anyway. But her mother could never stop being her
mother, whatever happened.
"So, I just thought I’d tell
you. You may go and see her if you want, but I wouldn’t say anything. It may
upset her," Cal said.
"All right," Rose said.
"Come along, then,
Rose," he said, holding out his arm.
"Oh, no. You must have
misunderstood," Rose said simply. "I said I was going to see my
mother, not that I was going with you. You may leave now, Mr. Hockley."
Cal gave her an evil look and
wandered off.
"Jack, I hope you don’t
mind. It’s just that…I mean, if she is…and she never stopped being my
mother," Rose said.
"Listen, Rose. It’s
okay," Jack said. "You go and see your mother. I’ll be all right, as
long as you come back to me after."
"Of course I will," she
promised. "See you later," she said, kissing him quickly.
"Bye, Rose," he said.
Cal watched from first class, an
evil smirk spreading across his face. There was no way she could get away now.
*****
Rose found her mother taking a
walk on the deck with the countess.
"Mother," Rose said
sadly.
"Rose!" her mother
cried, and embraced her. "I thought I’d lost you," she said. Rose
hoped for a moment that her mother might have changed, but as soon as the
countess left, she whispered to Rose in hushed, angry tones. "How dare you
leave me, Rose? You have a duty to me, to the family name."
"Mother, I don’t care,"
Rose said. "I love Jack, whatever you say."
"You don’t," her mother
said, in denial. "Cal is a great match."
"Cal is a bastard," she
whispered.
"Rose, that language is
unacceptable," her mother said.
Rose forgot her fury as she
remembered why she was actually there.
"So…are you all right
today?" she asked carefully.
"Fine. Just fine," she
said. "I’ll feel better when I know you’re back with us."
"Mother, just because…"
Rose started. She didn’t want to say the words ‘you’re dying’, so she just left
a space. "You can’t make me come back."
"Rose, believe me, when you
get off this ship, it will not be with him. He has nothing to offer you, no
hope for the future," her mother said.
"He has love, Mother,"
Rose said. "And that is all I need."
"So, love is going to pay
for food and clothes?" her mother asked. "He can’t work now. Cal has
informed me about his arm."
"And I bet you’re
happy," Rose said angrily.
After a silence, Rose spoke
again. She really didn’t want her last memories of her mother to be arguments.
"So, have you thought about
what’s going to happen when it happens?" Rose asked sadly.
"What on earth are you
talking about, Rose?" her mother asked.
"You’re ill, Mother. You’ve
got to face this," Rose said, tears springing to her eyes.
"I am most certainly not
ill. Where did you hear this rubbish?" her mother asked.
"Don’t be silly, Mother. Cal
told me everything," Rose said, angry that her mother could still be lying
to her, but sad at how scared she must be to keep pretending. "I know
you’re dying, Mother," she added, in barely a whisper.
"Pardon?" her mother
asked.
Rose took a deep breath and
cleared her head before carrying on. God, she needed Jack right now. He would
know how to help her. "Cal told me this morning about the doctor. He said
you only have a little while left," she said, surprisingly calm.
"He’s told me everything, Mother. Don’t hide from it anymore."
"I don’t know what kind of
joke this is, Rose, but it certainly isn’t funny," her mother said.
"But he told me you were
dying," Rose said.
"Why ever would he say such
a thing?" her mother asked. Rose could tell, at that moment, from the tone
of her voice and the look on her face, that her mother had no idea what was
going on, and was most certainly not dying.
"You’re…you’re not, are
you?" Rose asked, angry with herself for her gullible stupidity, and
angrier with Cal. How low was this man going to sink to try to get her back.
She felt sick to her stomach as she thought about the last hour. She had
believed that her mother only had days to live, all so her ex-fiancé could try to
win her back. How the hell did he think that would work? She felt dizzy and
pale as she stood in front of her mother, who was quite obviously fit and
healthy. She had felt so terrible when Cal had told her, she felt almost
guilty, but she didn’t know why, and now she had found out that all those
feelings had been part of a cruel plan by a cold-hearted man to try to win her
back. What kind of sanity did he have if he thought telling her that her mother
was dying would make her go back to him? Her head swam with anger, confusion,
and deep, deep hatred.
"No," her mother said
truthfully. Rose turned her back and ran, ran to find Cal as soon as she
possibly could.