I HAVE NOTHING
Chapter Seven
Forgiveness
Rose’s diamond wasn’t unnoticed. The
bomb had exploded and all the journalists were publishing the mysterious
Captain DeRouche’s fiancée’s photograph, with the beautiful jewel on her neck.
Vincent didn’t ask for explanations, but Rose felt that she should tell him the
truth—who she was, why she had that diamond, and why she had chosen to put it
on that night.
She knew he would be hurt, but
she couldn’t hide the most powerful part of her past—her love for Jack. The
captain listened and tenderly caressed her cheek.
"You must have suffered a
lot…"
And they never talked about that
anymore.
War was still exploding in
Europe, and in America, all the people followed anxiously the news of the
continent. Ruth DeWitt Bukater also. She read all the newspapers that arrived
at the little dress factory, especially the society pages. Maybe for pride, but
she still felt like a part of it.
A lot of times she read news
about people whom she had been near, at the same table, same hotel, or holiday.
The wedding of a duchess, the death of a millionaire…
Imagining those weddings and
those funerals was all she had of her past life. Losing her daughter had
brought down all her future plans, leaving her completely alone and rejected by
the ones who had, at one time, given her a hand. Cal, Rose’s ex-fiancé, had humiliated
her cruelly.
"With Rose dead, there’s
nothing forcing me to have pity on you."
He was right. Rose had been her
only card. And she had lost her…that was the punishment for her pride and
ambition. She hadn’t known how to love her daughter, and now it was too late.
Actually, having to earn her
money as a seamstress didn’t bother her. It was just a way to wait for death
with dignity. Her daughter was dead, and living had no meaning now…Ruth left
the clothes she was working on to enjoy her minutes of reading and memories,
but the muscles of her body stopped suddenly and the threads and fabrics she
had nearly fell to the ground.
She sat in a chair, shaking, and
took a deep breath before looking at the picture again—it was Rose! She was
alive! Ruth almost couldn’t keep breathing. Her arms and legs didn’t respond.
She couldn’t move. She just screamed silently as she put the paper close to her
chest, as if it were a baby.
When she reacted, she almost
swallowed the words printed, as though trying to memorize them. She had to go
to Paris. She had to see Rose and tell her she was sorry for all the pain she
had caused her. But her savings weren’t enough for such travel. She thought of
Cal immediately. She would go to see him, and she would beg him. She would get down
on her knees…now she need his money desperately, and she didn’t mind his
superior look.
According to rumor, Cal and his
associates had dinner every Friday at Garden’s Hall, the most luxurious
restaurant on Fifth Avenue. It was the only place she could find him.
*****
A waiter opened the door of the
restaurant. Her arrogance and her fine lady demeanor were still intact, so she
didn’t have any problem moving amongst the proud faces of the clientele. She
finally saw him. He hadn’t changed a bit. He still was the most elegant man she
had ever seen, and she had seen quite a few. He was still the most arrogant of
all.
"Ruth, what a…disquieting
surprise. You’re the last person I would think of meeting here."
"I’ve come looking for you,
Cal. I’m here to ask you a favor."
Cal took her arm roughly and led
her to one of the private rooms.
"I think I made it very
clear that you and I…"
He couldn’t keep speaking. Ruth
took the newspaper and threw it in his face.
"I’ve come for this."
Cal’s face burned as he read the
page, walking nervously across the room. Suddenly, he stopped. He looked at
Ruth and tore the paper in his hands.
"This doesn’t mean anything
now. For me, Rose is still dead. Your daughter is nothing but a slut, and you
know it better than anyone."
She would have slapped him, but
she couldn’t. She needed his money to go to Paris. She left her hatred behind
and got down on her knees. She asked, she begged, but Cal’s eyes stayed cold.
"Stand up. You’re pathetic.
You should be ashamed of your daughter instead of being humiliated over
her."
Cal lit a cigarette and blew the
smoke at the ceiling. He didn’t even look at her before he left the room.
*****
Ruth arrived home sobbing, and
she couldn’t even hear the knocking on her door.
"Ruth! Ruth! Open up,
please!"
The smiling, plump face of Molly
Brown appeared behind the door. She had also had dinner at that restaurant that
night. And she had heard the conversation between Cal and Ruth, and she had
followed her home. She wanted to help her.
She took care of everything. And
she was the one who, in Paris, went to the DeRouche manor to ask for Rose.
"I’m an old family
friend."
The butler told her that Rose had
kept working at the hospital, and that was where Molly saw the rebel girl she
had met on the Titanic. Rose was glad to see her, too, and she hugged her
close, but a wave of panic took all the happiness away when she looked at the
door. Her mother was there, too.
"She just wants to
apologize, dear," whispered Molly in her ear. "Just that."
Rose was in front of her mother,
not moving. She didn’t know what to do. Love and resentment were fighting
inside of her heart…suddenly, her mother’s head was on her chest. She was on
her knees, crying like a little girl.
"Forgive me, Rose…forgive
me. I was stupid, my love, a coward, a…" But she couldn’t continue,
because Rose’s fingers were on her lips. Rose didn’t need anything else to know
that Ruth’s repentance was real. She kissed her cheek and saw in her mother’s
eyes the love that she had needed all those times. Really, the Titanic had
changed everybody.