YOU JUMP, I JUMP
Chapter Six

Time flies. It really does. You don’t notice it much when you’re a kid, but once you reach a certain age, it seems to fly by without warning or care. After Jo married Johnny, the months began to go so quickly, even I noticed. Gloria, as it turned out, was also going to have a baby, explaining why she had been pale at the wedding in April. Mom began to get big again, like she had with Luke…and she was hungry all the time! There were also times when she was moody and tired, but Jack was pretty good at keeping her calm. It was very funny to see them together because it seemed like all it took was one look to make her happy.

It wasn’t like they weren’t affectionate. Quite the contrary. I can hardly remember a time when they weren’t attached at the hip, with their arms around each other. It didn’t disgust me like it did when Jo and Johnny were loving toward each other. It was midsummer already and it was possibly one of the hottest summers of my life. Mom and Jack had decided to take us on a trip to Chippewa Falls with Jo and Johnny coming along. They were going to meet us there. We were driving the whole way and though I was excited about the trip, I was definitely not excited about being stuck in a car for two days with Luke.

Lucky for me, both of us fell asleep about four hours into the drive and when I woke up again, it was night. Mom and Jack were talking quietly.

"I’m telling you, Rose," Jack was saying in a hushed voice. "I think we’re going back to war…"

"I don’t even want to think about it," Mom said, sighing.

"Something is happening over there…Germany. I don’t know much about it, but people are starting to talk. Some person named Hitler," he replied. "He’s no good."

"How is that going to affect us, though?" Mom asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I’m not sure yet. I hope it doesn’t come to that, though." He swallowed. "I really don’t."

"Thank goodness the boys are too young to go," Mom replied, glancing back. I quickly pretended to still be asleep, but my mind was racing. What if we did go to war someday? Would I fight?

Yes.

If we went to war, I would join the army and fight the bad people. The idea began to form in my mind as I tried to picture myself full grown and in a uniform. I would get to have a gun and people would respect me because I was a soldier. I could not stop thinking about it, and, when we stopped for the night to sleep, I dreamed of being a celebrated hero. I dreamed I was given a medal and there was a girl…

I couldn’t see her face, but her hair was dark, like ribbons. I was looking at her in a panicking crowd and I was…sad…I tried to reach for her, but she got lost in the mass of people. I searched and searched, but she was gone.

I woke with a start. I didn’t even like girls…why would I dream of one? Jack must have noticed I had woken up because he was looking at me with concern all over his face.

"What’s wrong?" he asked. I shook my head.

"Bad dream." I tried to breathe. His eyes were bright with worry.

"It must have been pretty bad, Jamie," he replied, patting my shoulder.

"Yeah," I agreed.

"Do you want to tell me?" he asked gently. I shrugged, wiping my eyes.

"There was this girl…" I opted not to tell him the soldier bit. "And she needed my help, but I couldn’t get to her and then she was gone."

"A girl?" Jack asked, looking bemused. "What did she look like?" I closed my eyes, trying to remember.

"She had dark hair…not like Mom and Jo’s…it was straight. And shiny…and I think her eyes were brown. But I couldn’t see her face." I felt stupid even saying it.

"How old was she?" Jack asked curiously. I shrugged again.

"Don’t know. Probably around Jo’s age," I admitted. He smiled slightly.

"And why did she need your help?" he inquired.

"I don’t know." I bit my lip. "I think it was because I was grown up."

"Oh…" Jack nodded, understanding.

"It’s stupid. I know," I muttered.

"Not stupid," Jack assured me. "Just a weird dream."

"Why aren’t you asleep?" I asked him. He looked at Mom.

"Bad dream," he replied and I noticed for the first time that he looked slightly distraught. His face was drawn and his forehead was beaded with sweat.

"What was it about?" I asked, and he shook his head.

"Nothing that you would want to know about, kid." His voice sounded different than usual. He seemed like he was forcing words out of his mouth.

"I am not stupid, Jack," I said testily. Staring at me a moment, he took one more look at Mom before turning to me.

"I had a nightmare about the Titanic," he said, looking sheepish.

"Oh," I said, understanding very little. I knew that he and Mom had been on that ship when it had sunk twenty-one years before, but it seemed like a million years ago to me. I wasn’t even born yet.

"It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does, it’s bad," Jack said, looking at my mother again. "I have to make sure it was just a dream…and then I see you and your brother and your Mom and I can relax again."

"Well, that’s good," I said, unsure of what else to say.

"I think," he said, "that it is time for you to go back to sleep. Dream about the smell of pine trees and fresh air, because that’s where we’re going to be tomorrow." I nodded, trying to envision this natural picture of heaven that he’d described to us. The sparkling lake…the tall pine trees…

I fell asleep within seconds.

When we arrived in Chippewa Falls the next day, Jo and Johnny were already there, waiting for us. She was grinning with her wild red hair pulled up at the crown of her head. I’d forgotten how long her hair was. Mom got out of the car and looked at the small cabin and the surroundings. There was a line of tall pines on one side of the cabin and on the other was a meadow.

"Wild strawberries grow in that meadow," Jack was saying, pointing to it. “You can pick them and eat them right out of the ground. They’re tiny, though."

"It’s perfect," Jo said, bending to pick a wildflower that was growing near her feet. The entire area was covered in lush green and it was amazing. Jack had been right. It smelled like heaven. Taking Mom’s hand, Jack led us into the cottage, where Jo and Johnny had already prepared breakfast. Grateful, I sat at the small table and destroyed a piece of bacon. I looked at where Jo was lounging sideways on a chair with her legs hanging over the arms. I had never seen her look so relaxed.

All my life, Jo had worked hard…and now that she was finally happy, she seemed completely different.

"Hey, Jon?" she asked. "You want to rub my feet?" I could tell she was kidding and Jonathan must have, too, because he started laughing.

"That’s disgusting, Josephine." He sat across from me, buttering some toast. Looking at my Mom and Jack, he said, "When we visited Dave and Gloria, he rubbed her feet constantly."

"It was obnoxious," Jo agreed. "I mean, I know the poor girl is pregnant, but really!" They started laughing again. "Dave is such a sucker," she added. Mom shrugged, setting about getting food for Luke.

"It’s nice to see him so in love with someone," she said. "He was never interested in anyone when you two were younger…so to see him so happy, it’s nice." Jo nodded.

"It is…" She cracked up again. "Until you see him practically kissing his wife’s feet!" Jonathan laughed again, too.

"You’ll understand when you get pregnant, Jo," Mom said, sitting down. Jack was looking through the cupboards.

"Ugh," he muttered.

"What’s wrong, Jack?" Mom asked, helping herself to some food.

"Spider," he said, brushing it away. Jo sat up straight.

"Well, I’m not pregnant," she said firmly. "And I have no intentions of being pregnant for a while."

Jonathan dropped his fork.

"Are you all right, Jo?" he asked.

"Fine," she said, too quickly. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at her.

"Are you pregnant?" Mom asked incredulously. Jo looked from her to Jack and then to Johnny, who seemed like he might throw up.

"No!" She sighed. "I don’t know…" Jack immediately immersed himself into cleaning out the cupboard. "I’m two days late."

"Oh…" Mom nodded.

Late for what?

"I’m not ready," she said apologetically to Johnny, who nodded in agreement.

"Neither am I," he admitted.

"Late for what?" I asked, but was ignored.

"I mean," Johnny went on, "we only got married three months ago. I’m not ready to share you…"

"Well, you might not have a choice, you two," Mom pointed out. I sighed.

"Late for what?" I asked impatiently. Mom looked at me, but said nothing.

"It wouldn’t be so bad," Jack chimed in. "It would be different, but not bad."

"It’s not like you know nothing about babies, Jo," Mom added, filling Luke’s glass with milk.

"I know that," Jo said irritably.

"Late for what?" I asked, loudly this time.

"Nothing, darling," Mom replied patiently. "Just something girls get when they are old enough to have babies."

"You mean the bloody thing?" I inquired, remembering Jo complaining about it once. Mom’s eyes widened and Jonathan choked on his piece of toast.

"Yes…" Mom answered cautiously. "How did you know about that?"

"I heard you and Jo talking once," I said, uninterested again. I had gotten my answer. Jack was trying–unsuccessfully–to hide the fact that he was laughing. I could see his shoulders shaking with mirth as he stood facing away from us.

"Stop laughing, Jack Dawson," Mom said, without even looking at him.

"Mom, am I gonna bleed, too?" Luke asked worriedly. Jo burst into laughter, hiding her face now, too. Johnny, I could tell, was biting the inside of his cheek to keep his amusement in.

"I…" Mom began, trying to remain diplomatic, but then she, too, began to laugh and everyone let it out. Jack fell to the floor, he was laughing so hard, and Jo had tears coming out of her eyes. Mom leaned over and kissed Luke on the forehead, saying something to him that I could not hear. She looked at where Jack was lying on his back, still laughing, and shook her head.

"Now then, Jo," she went on. "Have you been sick at all?" Jo shook her head. "Moody?"

"No." Jonathan replied for her. "She’s been in a great mood." Mom studied Jo for a moment before making her assessment.

"You’re not pregnant," she said easily. "Just relax."

"How do you know?" Jo asked. Mom shrugged, taking a huge bite of food.

"You take after me," she said. "You would be sick as a dog."

"Huh," Jo said, visibly relaxing. Jack stood up and kissed Mom on the cheek, stealing a piece of her bacon.

"Get your own food, Dawson!" Mom joked, snatching another piece out of his hand. The sound of a barking dog came from outside and Jack looked out the window.

"I don’t believe it…" he said, grinning like a fifteen-year-old. Opening the door, he went outside.

"Jack Dawson, is that you?" an older man asked. He was heavyset and his big, gray dog stood beside him.

"Yep. Haven’t seen you in a long time, Earl!" he said, shaking the man’s hand. "How are you?"

"Good…got me a couple grandkids now…Jenny and Jake," Earl replied proudly. "They’re ten and eight," he said.

"Glad to hear it. I got me three kids…soon to be four." He gestured to Mom, who was standing beside him.

"That grown up girl there is your little girl?" Earl asked in disbelief, seeing Jo.

"Yep. She’s twenty," Jack replied proudly.

"Looks like her mama," Earl said, winking at Mom, who blushed.

"Sure does," Jack agreed, looking at me. "That there is our boy, James, and the little one is Luke."

"Hey! I’m not little!" Luke protested. Jack chuckled, but I wasn’t listening anymore. He’d called me our boy.

Did that mean he thought of me as his son? It was too much for me to hope for. It had been almost four years since Daddy had died. His face was so vague to me…but I still remembered him.

"Where’s Daddy?"

"He’s…he’s just running a little late. That’s all, James."

"Do you think he’s okay?"

"Sure…I bet he’ll be home any minute."

I tried very hard to remember Daddy’s face. I would know him anywhere and when I looked at the pictures, I remembered, but in my mind, I could barely see him anymore. I hoped he wouldn’t be mad at me for thinking of Jack as my father, but I couldn’t deny it any longer.

Jack Dawson was my father.

"Duke here just sired some pups," Earl was saying. "Your boys interested in one? I’ll give it to ya for free." Jack looked at Mom, who looked at us. I could barely hide the hope in my eyes. She beamed at me.

"You want a dog?"

"Yeah!" Luke cried, and I nodded.

"Yeah."

"Come on over, then. I got eight of them at the house ready to go right now," Earl replied.

"Can we?" I asked Jack, who nodded.

"Sure." He kissed Mom. "Will you be okay while we’re gone?"

"Of course," she said, laughing.

We followed Earl through a few trees to his house, where I could hear the faint yips of puppies.

"Duchess!" Earl called as another gray dog bounded out of the house with a gaggle of awkward pups following her. I counted them out. Seven.

"I thought there were eight," I said aloud. Jack frowned, counting them.

"Hey, Earl, I think you’re missing a pup," he said as the group bounded past us. Luke laughed as a couple of them stopped to play with him. I turned to look again and notice a pair of light blue eyes peering around the corner of the open doorway. I crept up and peeked around it. Sitting there, staring up at me with calm blue eyes, was the eighth puppy. He was the most adorable thing I’d ever seen. His paws were too big for his little body and he had a slight potbelly because he was a baby.

That was my dog.

He sniffed my outstretched hand and licked it. I looked up and saw Jack leaning against the doorframe with his arms folded. A small smile was on his face.

"That’s your guy, huh?" he asked, crouching to stroke the pup’s head.

"Yeah," I agreed as the puppy yawned, revealing his tiny baby teeth. His eyelashes were extremely long and his face was so full of expression that I had to laugh at the way he was looking from Jack to me. He nudged my hand to pet him again. I gathered him up and his legs were surprisingly long for a puppy, hanging out of my arms. But he was so docile, it didn’t matter.

"Earl!" Jack called out to where Earl and Luke were petting the others. "We found our boy," he said. Earl looked surprised.

"That’s our little runt," Earl said with a chuckle, coming over to check him out. "He’s a bit shy, but a real sweet one." Luke reached up to pet his muzzle with his fingertips.

"He’s cute," Luke said in approval. Earl gave us a collar and a leash for him and a bag full of food.

"Mary is having a big dinner tonight if you all want to come, Jack," Earl said as we were getting ready to leave. Jack nodded.

"I’ll check with the wife, but I think it should be fine…thanks for the dog. It made my son real happy," he said, looking over at me. Again, I got the hopeful feeling in my chest.

Mom ran out to greet us and made a noise comparable to a squeal when she saw the puppy, who I still had cradled in my arms. Jo and Johnny joined us, too.

"Oh, my goodness!" Jo said, touching his little face. "He is a doll."

"No, he’s not!" Luke corrected her. "He’s a hunter! Earl said we could take him huntin’."

"Not likely," Mom said gently, laughing. "You’re too young to go hunting, Luke."

"Aw, Ma…" he complained, making Jo giggle.

"What’s his name?" Jo asked, and Jack looked at me.

"You picked him, James. What is his name?"

"Sam," I said quietly, setting him on his feet. He bounded around playfully for a few moments before plopping down and lying on his side. Everybody laughed. Jo and Johnny started back into the cabin and Luke followed with Mom, but I lingered behind.

"You happy with him, James?" Jack asked, sitting down in the grass beside Sam. I nodded, sitting there, too. I rubbed Sam’s stomach, which he loved. One of his big ears flopped over his eyes.

"I always wanted a dog," I confessed. Jack smiled.

"I think you found yourself a keeper there, James," he said as Sam yawned again.

"Did you mean what you said earlier?" I blurted. My eyes widened in fear.

"About what?" he asked, his light eyes confused.

"Do you really think of me as your son?" I asked bravely. His eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Yeah," he said quietly, looking me in the eyes. "I really do. You’re a great kid…and I couldn’t love you more if you were my own."

"Okay," I said, nodding and looking down. I felt a relief settle over me.

"You were really worried, weren’t you?" Jack asked me, sounding entirely like a father.

"Yeah," I said, looking at Sam, who had fallen asleep.

"And you’re worried that I’ll love Jo and the baby more than you and Luke?" he went on, voicing my worst fears.

"Something like that," I muttered.

"Jamie," he began. "I need you to know that isn’t true, okay?" He held me by the shoulders. "Listen to me, James…I would take a bullet for you. All right?" I nodded. "All right?" he asked again, louder this time. "I need to hear you say you understand, James."

"Yeah," I whispered. "I got it."

"Good," he breathed. "Good." Same made a noise in his sleep. "You two are gonna be great friends," he said, watching me pet Sam. I thought so, too. He began to rise and I stood up, too. As he started toward the house, I called after him.

"Hey!" He turned back to look at me. I ran after him and threw my arms around him, hugging him as tightly as I used to hug my father. Looking up, I met his eyes and smiled. "Thanks, Dad." His eyes misted over, but he didn’t let the tears fall. I noticed his expression break for the slightest of moments, but he took a deep breath and nodded.

"Come on. I can smell your Mom cooking something…and I bet it’s good." He put an arm around me as we started toward the house. Turning back for a second, he whistled.

Sam sprung off the ground and ran after us.

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