MEMORIES
Chapter Six
Jason Calvert
Rose picked up another picture.
This one was of the young man who had taken her to the hospital. He was just
standing in the corner, a baby bottle in his hand. Rose sighed deeply as she
remembered how Jason had decided to just barge into her life, without her
permission, mind you. He had refused to take no for an answer.
*****
Rose sat up in bed, gazing at her
son, who was peacefully sleeping in her arms when there was a slight knock on
the door. She looked up to see the nurse and the young man who had driven her
to the hospital.
"Ma’am, your husband’s here
to see you and the baby." The nurse smiled.
"Well, actually…" the
man began, but Rose interrupted him.
"That’s all right, nurse. He
may come in."
The nurse nodded and turned to
leave. "Congratulations on your son, sir."
The man just looked at her,
stunned at the mistake. "I’m sorry about that."
"Don’t worry about it."
Rose shrugged. "I’d like to thank you, Mr…"
"Calvert."
"I’d like to thank you, Mr.
Calvert. For all you’ve done. I’m sorry I was so forceful at the apartment.
It’s just that I was in a hurry."
"That’s okay. I
understand." The man nodded. "I’m just happy I knocked on your door
at the right time. So, you have a son, huh?"
Rose nodded. "His name’s
Jake Fabrizio Dawson. Fabrizio’s an Italian name, just in case you were
wondering."
"It’s a nice name. How about
yours? I can’t keep calling you ma’am, can I?"
"It’s Rose. Rose Dawson,
waitress extraordinaire."
"Nice to meet you, Mrs.
Dawson. My name’s Jason. Jason Calvert, university student
extraordinaire." The man offered his hand for a handshake.
"Nice to meet you, Mr.
Calvert."
"Just call me Jason."
Jason shrugged.
"Well, then, just call me
Rose." Rose grinned.
Jason’s eyes again fell on the
sleeping baby in her arms. "So, where’s Mr. Dawson?"
"Oh." Rose’s sunny mood
dampened a little as she thought of Jack. He should be here with her right now.
Not some university student she didn’t even know. "He’s…he died about a
month before I found out I was pregnant."
"Oh. Oh, I’m sorry. You must
have been devastated."
Rose just smiled, then changed
the subject. She definitely didn’t want to talk about Jack. She’d been thinking
about him during the two hours since Jake had been born. Now it was time to
move on to other things. "So, you’re new here in Santa Monica?"
Jason nodded. "Just moved
here from Philadelphia. I was on a grant in school there, but things got messed
up somehow, so I headed on out here to California to start a new life."
"California seems to be a
perfect place for that." Rose nodded. "Goodness knows, I should know
from experience."
"So, Rose…I take it that you
live by yourself in that apartment building. How do you support yourself?"
"I’m a waitress down at the
café on the corner." Rose smiled. "It’s not the ritziest job, but it
pays the bills and puts food on the table. And right now, that’s all that
matters."
"But will it be enough to
support little Jack there?" Jason asked, staring up at the ceiling.
"Excuse me?"
"Jake. I’m sorry. I meant to
say Jake. It’s just that the name sounds so much like Jack…it’s an honest
mistake," Jason stuttered.
"No. It’s all right. Don’t
be sorry. It’s my fault." Rose looked down at the baby. "I guess
that’s why I named him Jake. Because it was so close to Jack, and…"
"Jack’s the name of the
father. Right?"
Tears in her eyes, Rose looked at
the Jason and nodded. "He was an artist. He could draw the most
plain-looking person and make them look like the most beautiful person on paper."
"How did he die?"
"You know, I think that’s
enough about Jack. You know…he was just someone…listen, it’s getting late and
it’s been a long day. Thank you for driving me here and everything, but I
really do think you should go."
"Rose…I’m…"
"I’ll probably see you again
around the building when I return home. So, I’ll see you around."
"Rose…" Jason began,
then thought better of trying to continue the conversation. She obviously
didn’t want to talk about Jack, and he was going to honor that wish. "I’ll
see you around. Maybe I’ll even stop by to see how you’re coming along."
"I’d like that." Rose
smiled.
"Well, then, I’ll see you
then." Jason waved before leaving the room.
*****
That night, Rose found herself
on the Titanic once again. It had been six months since she had last had this
dream. She immediately knew where to go. The bow of the ship. This time Jake
was with her, and Jack was waiting for them, his eyes sparkling with love.
"I brought your
son." Rose smiled.
"He’s beautiful, Rose.
Just like his mother." Jack grinned, then looked back up at Rose, a
serious expression on his face. "Rose…our son needs a male role model. He
needs a man he can look up to."
"He will. I’m going to
tell him everything he needs to know about his father…"
"That’s not good enough,
Rose, and you know it. Our son needs a male role model that’s flesh and blood.
And I sent you one. You just have to let him in." Jack stroked her cheek.
"Jack…"
"Let him in, Rose. For
Jake’s sake."
Rose sniffed back fresh tears.
And Jack laughed. "What are you crying for? This isn’t good-bye, Rose. Not
by a long shot. It’ll never be good-bye for you and me…don’t you know that by
now?"
"But, Jack…I’m not ready.
Doesn’t that mean anything to you?"
"You’re not ready for
another romantic relationship. But how ‘bout a friend? You need one, Rose. One
who’s close by, not hundreds of miles away. One that’s alive…not
deceased." Jack sighed. "You may say that’s enough for you…but is it
really enough for our son? Think about it, Rose."
"I will." Rose
smiled.
"And don’t forget your
promise. Live life to the fullest. Make it count."
"I will, Jack. I’ll make
it count." Rose felt tears fill her eyes as she began to float away from
Jack. "Jack, wait! I’m not ready!"
Jack didn’t answer. He just
waved to her, tears in his eyes. She thought she heard him whisper that he
loved her. Then he was gone, and she was back in the hospital room, her pillow
wet from crying.
Two Weeks Later
Rose was rocking her sleeping
son, singing Come Josephine to him as he slept peacefully, when there
was a knock on the door. Placing the baby in his crib, Rose got up and opened
the door to find Jason Calvert bearing a bouquet of roses and a teddy bear with
a red bow around its waist.
"Hello," he greeted.
"Oh, hi." Rose smiled.
"Come on in. I’m sorry the place is such a mess. It’s just that I haven’t
had a chance to clean up since Jake was born."
"Yeah. The landlady
mentioned that you came home a week ago with your baby. I was meaning to come
over before now, but things kept coming up. But I’m here now, and I’ve brought
some gifts for the new mother and her baby." Jason handed the roses and
bear to Rose.
"Oh, thank you. You didn’t
have to do this." Rose grinned.
"I wanted to. It’s also a
peace offering for sticking my foot in my mouth the last time I saw you."
"Oh, yeah." Rose’s
smile faded a little at the mention of their discussion about Jack. She
remembered her dream about Jack and him telling her that he had sent Jason so
she could have a friend nearby. That was when she had to ask. "Jason…what
made you come here that night when you took me to the hospital?"
Jason was confused by the
question. Why would she ask him that now? Should he tell her the truth? Of
course he should. Something…someone insisted that he tell her the truth.
"Don’t think I’m insane or anything, but a voice told me to knock on your
door. That you’d be able to help me."
"A voice?"
"I know it sounds weird,
but…that’s how it happened." Jason shrugged, looking at the roses.
Rose was dumbstruck. Jack had
told her he had sent someone, but…she had never thought he’d be so blunt about
it. Of course, she was having his baby at the time. "Was this voice
belonging to a man…a young man?"
Jason simply nodded.
Rose just nodded. "Of
course. Well, I’m glad you did stop by. I don’t know what I would have done if
you hadn’t."
"Rose…you don’t think I’m
crazy, do you?" Jason asked uncertainly.
"Of course I don’t, Mr.
Calvert. I had a similar experience six months ago. It’s quite
understandable." Rose giggled. "Sit down and I’ll fix you some tea
and tell you about it."
"You don’t have to,"
Jason quickly replied. He had a feeling that telling him would reopen an
already festering wound, and he didn’t want to be the cause of anymore pain for
her. "But I will take some of that tea."
"All right." Rose
nodded, relief in her eyes. She was glad he had given her a way out of talking
about Jack. His memory still hurt her so much…she looked forward to the day
when she could look back on her time with Jack without the stabbing pain in her
heart. She was determined never to love anybody like that again, except for her
son. "So, Mr. Calvert, what have you been up to since I saw you
last?"
"Getting used to the
weather. It’s gorgeous here in Santa Monica. I can’t wait to go to that
pier." Jason grinned.
Rose smiled. "That was one
of the first places I headed to when I moved here. It’s fantastic, Jason.
You’ll like it."
Jason smiled at the lovely woman
sitting before him. Rose Dawson was indeed lovely, but her green eyes shone
with a certain knowledge of tragedy that no person her age should have. But he
wasn’t going to pry. Then he heard that voice again…the voice that had once
again led him to her door.
"Ask her to the pier."
Jason knew there was no
resisting. He had tried that a number of times, but the voice’s insistence and
his own desire to see the lovely redhead again had won out. "Would you
like to join me when I go? Since you’ve been there already, you can show me
around."
Rose’s eyes widened with
surprise. He wanted to take her to the pier…the pier that had belonged to her
and Jack alone. If it was anywhere else…she would say yes, but she felt she’d
be betraying Jack if she went to the pier with anyone but him.
"I-I’m sorry. But I can’t. I
have work, plus Jake here to look after…it just wouldn’t be a good idea."
Rose lowered her gaze to the floor, trying to push away the feeling that she
was somehow disappointing Jack by refusing Jake’s offer.
"Oh. Okay."
Once again, the voice spoke.
"Invite her to dinner. She can’t say no to that."
"Well, how about dinner at
that little restaurant a couple of blocks from here? Maybe we can take in a
play while we’re out. Just two new friends getting to know one another."
Jason threw in the last couple of sentences.
Rose bit her lip. Jack wanted her
to go on with her life. She knew that. In fact, he might somehow be setting
this up…but how could she go out with anyone when she still loved him so much?
When all she could do was remember the way his eyes had shone with amusement
when they had walked around the deck of the Titanic…or how he had smelt of
charcoal when they had made love in the Renault?
"Just as friends?" Rose
asked, her voice uncertain.
"Just as friends."
Jason nodded.
"Well, then, I don’t see why
not." Rose shrugged. "But just as long as you know this isn’t a
date."
"I know, Rose. Just two
friends going to dinner and a play. It’ll be fun." Jason smiled
enthusiastically, his blue eyes sparkling in such a way that Rose could almost
swear that those eyes belonged to her lost love, not her new friend.
"I’ll see you at eight,
then." Jason grinned from ear to ear.
Rose just nodded and followed him
to the door. He waved one more time before heading into his room, right across
the hall. Rose closed the door and closed her eyes tightly. What was she doing?
Why was she going out with a man who wasn’t Jack?
"Because it’s what I want
for you, Rose," Jack’s voice spoke into her ear.
"Oh, Jack." Rose
clamped a hand over her mouth and ran into the other room in tears. How could
Jack be so cruel as to make her promise to go on with her life? How did he
expect her to survive without him? Well, if that was what he wanted, that was
what he was going to get. Rose got up off her bed, this time determined to
forget Jack Dawson…even though he was the father of her baby, but that didn’t
make a difference. She was going to try her hardest to forget about the young
man who had turned her life around for the better.
Four Hours Later
Rose and Jason had just gotten
back from the play they had gone to see after dinner. They were standing
outside his door, preparing to say good night. At least, Rose was, anyway.
"Want to come in?"
Jason grinned.
"Isn’t that improper?"
"Not when we’re in the
living room having a couple of cocktails." Jason smiled and took her hand.
"Besides, we’re just friends. What’s going to happen?"
Rose smiled and nodded, accepting
his offer.
He excitedly pulled her into the
apartment and shed his coat on the couch. "Sit. Make yourself at home. I’ll
be back. I have to get out of this suit and tie. It’s killing me." Jason
laughed, disappearing through the door that led to his bedroom.
Rose sat back and thought to
herself. She was quite proud of herself. She hadn’t thought about Jack once
that evening. She hadn’t thought about how his hair shone in the sunlight or
how his cheeks had turned red when he had drawn her portrait in her stateroom.
"Stop it, Rose!" she
hissed, pushing the thoughts from her mind and getting up to look at the
photographs that Jason had set up on his mantle. They were quite interesting,
capturing bits and pieces from his life. She smiled as she spied a picture of
Jason with his arms wrapped around an attractive girl with blonde hair. She
wondered if she was his sweetheart back in his hometown. Somehow, the pictures
looked somewhat familiar, like she’d been to some of the places they had been
taken.
Everything became clear when she
saw the next picture…one that stood out among the rest and brought her hand up
to her mouth in surprise and shock. It was a picture of Jason and…Jack! Both
boys were standing in front of what looked to be a lake, holding a fish hooked
on a line between them. Both boys smiled happily as they held up their trophy
for the world to see.
"Ah…I remember when that
picture was taken." Jason smiled, appearing behind Rose. "It was the
winter of 1907."
"Who is he?" Rose asked
dumbly. She knew who the boy Jason was with was. She just wanted to know who he
was to Jason.
"My favorite cousin, Jack
Dawson." Jason crossed his arms. "I remember that picture. It was a
year before the fire that took his parents’ life, and we were out that morning
after being told not to even think about going out until our chores were done.
I, of course, had no intention of going out, but good old Jack…he was always
wanting to be somewhere he wasn‘t supposed to be. He talked me into joining him
on a trip down to Lake Wissota to do some ice fishing. That was when we caught
the biggest fish around. Jack was so excited, he forgot about the trouble we
were in and insisted on going to show Uncle Matt what we had caught. When Uncle
Matt saw that fish, he forgot all about the whipping he was going to give both
of us for disobeying. That night we had a grand old time dining on that big
bass."
"Sound like you two were
close." Rose smiled wistfully at the story.
"We were. As close as two
brothers. If you saw us together, you would think we were. That’s how close we
were." Jason smiled wistfully. "But sadly, Jack’s parents died the
year after, and he left Chippewa Falls and hasn’t been back yet. He, of course,
wrote me a couple of times. The last I heard, he was in Paris, trying to get
some of his drawings he liked so well sold. Haven’t heard from him since…it’s
been a whole year just about since that last letter."
"Jason…" Rose began ,
but was interrupted.
"You know, that’s not like
him. He always kept in touch within a six month period, but he hasn’t written
once…not one single time."
"I have to go." Rose
pushed her way to the door, tears beginning to spill from her eyes.
"Rose, wait! What’s
wrong?" Jason went after her. "Did I say something wrong? I’m sorry
if I did."
"No, Jason, it’s not
you…it’s…oh, never mind. I have to go." Rose rushed out the door and over
to her apartment, shutting door behind her.
Jason was left looking both
stunned and dazed. What had gotten into Rose? Why had she run away like someone
possessed? He’d have to find out later. Right now, he was going to make a call
on someone who was good at finding people. He was going to go in search of his
long lost cousin…and hopefully bring him home.
*****
Rose laid on her bed, looking up
at the ceiling. Cousin. Jason was Jack’s cousin. No wonder Jason reminded her
so much of Jack. Jack had led her to the person he was closest to.
"Oh, Jack!" Rose
sobbed, burying her face in her pillow. "Why are you doing this to
me?"
*****
"Because I love
you," a clear voice said beside her as a gentle hand ran through her hair.
Rose darted up and looked into a pair of familiar blue eyes.
"Jack?"
"Rose, don’t cry. I’m
sorry if I upset you. I thought I was helping you by sending my cousin…I
thought that you two could help each other. But I guess I was wrong." Jack
bowed his head sadly. "I just hated seeing you so sad and so lonely."
"Oh, Jack…you didn’t upset
me…and you did help me by sending your cousin. He’s the one who got me to the
hospital in time to deliver your son." Rose smiled, tenderly touching his
cheek.
"But you’re so miserable
right now, Rose…"
"I know. But that can’t
be helped. Not by anyone, no matter how close to you they were. Do you
understand?"
Jack slowly nodded. "But
if you don’t mind my saying so, I still say you two look good together. Jason’s
a good man, Rose. He’ll take good care of you and our son. Whether you tell him
about me or not."
"Should I, Jack?"
"I’ll leave that up to
you, Rose. We’re a subject you’re going to have to be ready to share. I can’t
tell you when or with whom to share it." Jack got up.
"Jack? Where are you
going?" Rose sat up from the mattress.
"It’s morning, Rose. It’s
time for you to wake up." Jack smiled lovingly down at her. "Wake up,
Rose."
"Jack." Rose reached
for him as he floated farther away from her.
"I love you, Rose. I’ll
always be with you." Jack, too, reached his hand out to her, to no avail.
He got farther and farther away.
"Jack, no! Wait!"
Rose cried. "Jack!"
*****
She bolted awake to bright
sunlight streaming through her window and Jake’s hungry cries from his crib.
"Coming, Jake," Rose
mumbled, forcing herself out of bed.