MEMORIES
Chapter Seven
Jason’s Grief
Present Day
Rose picked up the picture of
Jason and Jack together and closed her eyes in another memory. She had told the
small group that she had told no one of Jack, not even Lizzy’s
grandfather…which was true, since Lizzy’s grandfather was Jack himself. So how
could she possible have told him something he already knew? Plus the fact that
he was dead. But she had eventually told Jason. She had had no choice…Jack was
his cousin and he deserved to know the truth…she couldn’t bear to see his pain
the day she told him. She remembered it like it was yesterday.
April 15, 1913
Rose sat in her rocking chair,
rocking Jake to sleep and remembering the Titanic. A year ago. It all had
happened a year ago. She had lost the love of her life a year ago. It seemed
and felt like it was yesterday. It still hurt a lot when she thought of Jack.
If it wasn’t for the knowledge that he was always with her in spirit…she
would’ve gone insane. Jason’s presence was also a great help. He came over and
helped her with the baby and told her funny stories of his visits to Chippewa
Falls.
She got up to put the baby to bed
when there was frantic knocking at the door. She opened it to reveal Jason, his
eyes red from crying and tears still streaming from his eyes. Sobs still raked
his body as he stood in her doorway. In a way, it was kind of ironic. He
reminded her of herself one year ago, and, of course, last night…the
anniversary of most of the horror she and Jack had experienced and the hour of
Jack’s death.
"Jason?" Rose asked,
stunned. "Why, you look a fright. Come in. What happened?" Rose
ushered him into the apartment and sat him on the couch. "No, wait. Let me
go fix us some tea, and you can tell me all about it."
Jason just nodded and continued
his sobbing. Fifteen minutes later, Rose was seated on the couch next to Jason,
a hot cup of tea in each of their hands. "Now, do you mind telling me
what’s gotten you all upset?"
Jason looked at Rose, his blue
eyes full of tears. "It’s Jack. I hired a private detective a couple of
months ago to look for him. I was going to find him and insist that he come
home."
"Oh, Jason…why didn’t you
tell me?" Rose asked, her hands flying to her mouth in shock. She had no
idea Jason was searching for someone who could never be found again.
"I don’t know. It was
something private. Plus, I wanted to surprise you by introducing you to the
person I was closest to." Jason forced a smile.
"What did the private
detective come up with?" Rose asked, afraid to ask.
"He talked to a couple of
Swedes in Southampton and showed them Jack’s picture. They got this look on
their faces, he said. It was a look of sorrow…they said they had known him, and
that most likely he was dead!" Jason sobbed. "They said they had
played a game of poker with Jack and this Italian fellow named Fabrizio. Two
third class tickets aboard the Titanic were up for grabs. Jack, of course, won.
He was always a pro when it came to poker." Jason chuckled slightly.
"But, anyway, the last he saw of Jack was when he and that Italian guy
darted out of the pub to catch the Titanic. Of course, you know what happened
one year ago today. The Titanic sank…taking along with it most of the men and
practically all of the third class passengers. Any chance of my finding Jack
alive is very, very slim."
"Oh, Jason…"
"But, anyway, I’ve made up
my mind. I’m going to send out that detective in search of all third class
survivors. Anyone who may have known my cousin. Anyone who could tell me how
his last days were spent and how he died…nobly, I hope. In fact, I’m going to
go call that detective right now." Jason set down his tea and began for
the door.
"Jason, wait!" Rose
tried to stop him.
"I’ll be back, Rose! Just
wait here." Jason ran out the door and back to his apartment.
Rose sat in stunned silence.
Jason was in search of survivors to tell him about Jack. Little did he know
that there was one who could give him a firsthand account of how Jack had spent
his last days.
"Oh, Jack. What should I
do?" Rose’s voice caught on a sob.
"You know what to do, Rose.
I can’t tell you, but you know." Jack’s voice again spoke in her ear.
"Stay with me, Jack."
Rose bit her lip. "I need your strength if I’m going to relive this
again."
"I’m always here with ya,
Rose. Never doubt that."
Just then, a warmth went through
Rose and stayed with her. Even when Jason returned, the warmth never left. Jack
was giving her his strength. He wanted her to tell Jason the truth. He wanted
her to tell Jason about the Titanic.
"Well, the detective said
he’d get right on it." Jason grinned happily, his tears still drying in
his cheeks.
"Jason…call the detective
back and tell him his services are no longer needed." Rose took Jason’s
hands.
"What? Why would I do that?
I want to find out about my cousin…"
"Because there’s someone
right here who can tell you firsthand how Jack Dawson spent his last days, and
she’ll do it for free. No matter how much pain it causes her." Rose fought
back her tears and let Jack’s strength flow through her.
"Rose…I’m not getting
you." Jason was confused. Why was Rose doing this? Didn’t she want him to
find out what happened to Jack?
Rose began to sob a bit. Then she
stopped. The vacant look of grief was replaced by a piercing gaze, a gaze that
looked into his soul. Only one person had that gaze…but that person was dead.
"Listen to me, Jason. I know how Jack died because I was with him."
"You were? Rose…I’m not
getting you."
"I met Jack aboard the
Titanic. I was a first class passenger and he was third…"
So Rose began the magical dream
that turned into a horrible nightmare. She went through everything, including
the Renault and Jack’s getting framed for stealing the necklace. When she got
to the end, where she had claimed the name Dawson as her own, Jason was seated
in stunned silence.
"So that’s it. That’s how I
met and fell in love with Jack and stayed with him up until he died." Rose
sniffed back her waiting tears.
"Why didn’t you tell me this
before…when you first found out I was his cousin?"
"Because it hurt so much to
even think of him, and it still does. But I’m telling you now because it’s what
Jack wants. I know it is. I feel him with me every day. I sometimes even see
him in my dreams."
"Rose…Jake…is he Jack’s
baby?" Jason asked, already knowing the answer. He remembered that
conversation between them months ago in the hospital room.
Rose simply nodded. "He’s
all I have left of him now."
"May I hold him? For just a
little while. I need to feel that connection with Jack…please."
"Of course. Let me go get
him." Rose nodded, disappearing into her room to get the gurgling baby,
and reentered the room. "Here you go."
Jason sobbed as he took his
little cousin in his arms. Jason gasped as he realized the baby he must have
held a thousand times had Jack’s eyes and smile, even the shining blonde fuzz
on top his head. "I never really noticed how much he looks like
Jack."
"Does this mean you’re not
mad at me, Jason? For not telling you about Jack sooner?" Rose asked
cautiously.
"Why would I be mad at you,
Rose? You’re Jack’s true love. The woman he died for. You must have been very
special for him to go through all that."
"He was the special one. He
took my hand and showed me how to fly. He set me free from the bonds I was tied
with, and he gave me this beautiful little boy." Rose lovingly gazed down
on her baby. "And he brought me a good friend who was close to him…someone
who could share stories of his boyhood with his son."
"I miss him, Rose."
Tears again streamed from Jason’s eyes. "He was my best friend…I never
even got a chance to say good-bye."
"It’s never good-bye with
Jack, Jason. He’s always with us…even now. How do you think I got the strength
to talk about the Titanic when it hurts me so much?" Rose placed a gentle
hand on his shoulder. "It came from Jack. He lent me his strength."
"Rose…"
Then Rose got an idea. Show him
the pictures…the pictures of her and the faint image of Jack…that should make
him see that his beloved cousin would always be with him.
"Jason…I have to show you
something." Rose got up off the couch and got the picture of her on a
horse. "Look at this. Look real close, or you won’t see what I’m trying to
tell you."
Jason stared intently at the
picture and gasped in surprise when he found the faint image of Jack.
"When was this taken?"
"Not quite a year ago. But it
was after the Titanic. This was one of the pictures that told me Jack had never
left me."
"Oh, Rose…you must have been
so happy when you noticed this." Jason grinned happily.
"Speaking of pictures,
Jason, I have yet to take yours. You holding Jake like that…it’d be
perfect."
"Oh, Rose, no. I’m a mess.
There’s no way I can let you take my picture." Jason refused, standing up
as Rose got her camera.
"Oh, nonsense. You look
fine. Come on. Just one picture with you holding your little cousin. It can be
a new picture to put up on that mantle of yours." Rose laughed.
"Okay." Jason sighed in
defeat. "Where do you want me?"
"Over by the couch with
Jake." Rose motioned, holding up the camera. Jason smiled just as the
flash went off.
Two Weeks Later
Rose rushed over to Jake’s
apartment with the newly developed picture.
"Rose, what are you doing
here?" Jason asked once he opened the door.
"I thought you might want to
see this." Rose handed Jason the picture Rose had taken of him in her
apartment. Jason gasped when he examined the picture and noticed Jack standing
beside him, a hand on his shoulder, looking down at Jake.
"It’s Jack," Jason
gasped.
Rose nodded. "I knew you’d
want a copy, so I had one made."
"Thank you, Rose."
Jason took her in his arms. "Thank you so much! You don’t know how much
this means to me!"
"I’ve got a pretty good
idea." Rose smiled, leaning deeper into the embrace. Catching herself, she
pulled away. She didn’t want Jason to get the wrong idea. "I’d better go.
It’s getting late, and Jake’s waiting for me."
"Night, Rose." Jason
returned his attention to the picture.
"Good night, Jason."
Rose smiled, watching the gleam of fresh tears in his eyes. She knew she had
done something good…even though it had brought her pain and caused her to have
unwelcome feelings for a man who was so close to Jack.