MEMORIES
Chapter Seven

Jason’s Grief
Present Day

Rose picked up the picture of Jason and Jack together and closed her eyes in another memory. She had told the small group that she had told no one of Jack, not even Lizzy’s grandfather…which was true, since Lizzy’s grandfather was Jack himself. So how could she possible have told him something he already knew? Plus the fact that he was dead. But she had eventually told Jason. She had had no choice…Jack was his cousin and he deserved to know the truth…she couldn’t bear to see his pain the day she told him. She remembered it like it was yesterday.

April 15, 1913

Rose sat in her rocking chair, rocking Jake to sleep and remembering the Titanic. A year ago. It all had happened a year ago. She had lost the love of her life a year ago. It seemed and felt like it was yesterday. It still hurt a lot when she thought of Jack. If it wasn’t for the knowledge that he was always with her in spirit…she would’ve gone insane. Jason’s presence was also a great help. He came over and helped her with the baby and told her funny stories of his visits to Chippewa Falls.

She got up to put the baby to bed when there was frantic knocking at the door. She opened it to reveal Jason, his eyes red from crying and tears still streaming from his eyes. Sobs still raked his body as he stood in her doorway. In a way, it was kind of ironic. He reminded her of herself one year ago, and, of course, last night…the anniversary of most of the horror she and Jack had experienced and the hour of Jack’s death.

"Jason?" Rose asked, stunned. "Why, you look a fright. Come in. What happened?" Rose ushered him into the apartment and sat him on the couch. "No, wait. Let me go fix us some tea, and you can tell me all about it."

Jason just nodded and continued his sobbing. Fifteen minutes later, Rose was seated on the couch next to Jason, a hot cup of tea in each of their hands. "Now, do you mind telling me what’s gotten you all upset?"

Jason looked at Rose, his blue eyes full of tears. "It’s Jack. I hired a private detective a couple of months ago to look for him. I was going to find him and insist that he come home."

"Oh, Jason…why didn’t you tell me?" Rose asked, her hands flying to her mouth in shock. She had no idea Jason was searching for someone who could never be found again.

"I don’t know. It was something private. Plus, I wanted to surprise you by introducing you to the person I was closest to." Jason forced a smile.

"What did the private detective come up with?" Rose asked, afraid to ask.

"He talked to a couple of Swedes in Southampton and showed them Jack’s picture. They got this look on their faces, he said. It was a look of sorrow…they said they had known him, and that most likely he was dead!" Jason sobbed. "They said they had played a game of poker with Jack and this Italian fellow named Fabrizio. Two third class tickets aboard the Titanic were up for grabs. Jack, of course, won. He was always a pro when it came to poker." Jason chuckled slightly. "But, anyway, the last he saw of Jack was when he and that Italian guy darted out of the pub to catch the Titanic. Of course, you know what happened one year ago today. The Titanic sank…taking along with it most of the men and practically all of the third class passengers. Any chance of my finding Jack alive is very, very slim."

"Oh, Jason…"

"But, anyway, I’ve made up my mind. I’m going to send out that detective in search of all third class survivors. Anyone who may have known my cousin. Anyone who could tell me how his last days were spent and how he died…nobly, I hope. In fact, I’m going to go call that detective right now." Jason set down his tea and began for the door.

"Jason, wait!" Rose tried to stop him.

"I’ll be back, Rose! Just wait here." Jason ran out the door and back to his apartment.

Rose sat in stunned silence. Jason was in search of survivors to tell him about Jack. Little did he know that there was one who could give him a firsthand account of how Jack had spent his last days.

"Oh, Jack. What should I do?" Rose’s voice caught on a sob.

"You know what to do, Rose. I can’t tell you, but you know." Jack’s voice again spoke in her ear.

"Stay with me, Jack." Rose bit her lip. "I need your strength if I’m going to relive this again."

"I’m always here with ya, Rose. Never doubt that."

Just then, a warmth went through Rose and stayed with her. Even when Jason returned, the warmth never left. Jack was giving her his strength. He wanted her to tell Jason the truth. He wanted her to tell Jason about the Titanic.

"Well, the detective said he’d get right on it." Jason grinned happily, his tears still drying in his cheeks.

"Jason…call the detective back and tell him his services are no longer needed." Rose took Jason’s hands.

"What? Why would I do that? I want to find out about my cousin…"

"Because there’s someone right here who can tell you firsthand how Jack Dawson spent his last days, and she’ll do it for free. No matter how much pain it causes her." Rose fought back her tears and let Jack’s strength flow through her.

"Rose…I’m not getting you." Jason was confused. Why was Rose doing this? Didn’t she want him to find out what happened to Jack?

Rose began to sob a bit. Then she stopped. The vacant look of grief was replaced by a piercing gaze, a gaze that looked into his soul. Only one person had that gaze…but that person was dead. "Listen to me, Jason. I know how Jack died because I was with him."

"You were? Rose…I’m not getting you."

"I met Jack aboard the Titanic. I was a first class passenger and he was third…"

So Rose began the magical dream that turned into a horrible nightmare. She went through everything, including the Renault and Jack’s getting framed for stealing the necklace. When she got to the end, where she had claimed the name Dawson as her own, Jason was seated in stunned silence.

"So that’s it. That’s how I met and fell in love with Jack and stayed with him up until he died." Rose sniffed back her waiting tears.

"Why didn’t you tell me this before…when you first found out I was his cousin?"

"Because it hurt so much to even think of him, and it still does. But I’m telling you now because it’s what Jack wants. I know it is. I feel him with me every day. I sometimes even see him in my dreams."

"Rose…Jake…is he Jack’s baby?" Jason asked, already knowing the answer. He remembered that conversation between them months ago in the hospital room.

Rose simply nodded. "He’s all I have left of him now."

"May I hold him? For just a little while. I need to feel that connection with Jack…please."

"Of course. Let me go get him." Rose nodded, disappearing into her room to get the gurgling baby, and reentered the room. "Here you go."

Jason sobbed as he took his little cousin in his arms. Jason gasped as he realized the baby he must have held a thousand times had Jack’s eyes and smile, even the shining blonde fuzz on top his head. "I never really noticed how much he looks like Jack."

"Does this mean you’re not mad at me, Jason? For not telling you about Jack sooner?" Rose asked cautiously.

"Why would I be mad at you, Rose? You’re Jack’s true love. The woman he died for. You must have been very special for him to go through all that."

"He was the special one. He took my hand and showed me how to fly. He set me free from the bonds I was tied with, and he gave me this beautiful little boy." Rose lovingly gazed down on her baby. "And he brought me a good friend who was close to him…someone who could share stories of his boyhood with his son."

"I miss him, Rose." Tears again streamed from Jason’s eyes. "He was my best friend…I never even got a chance to say good-bye."

"It’s never good-bye with Jack, Jason. He’s always with us…even now. How do you think I got the strength to talk about the Titanic when it hurts me so much?" Rose placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "It came from Jack. He lent me his strength."

"Rose…"

Then Rose got an idea. Show him the pictures…the pictures of her and the faint image of Jack…that should make him see that his beloved cousin would always be with him.

"Jason…I have to show you something." Rose got up off the couch and got the picture of her on a horse. "Look at this. Look real close, or you won’t see what I’m trying to tell you."

Jason stared intently at the picture and gasped in surprise when he found the faint image of Jack. "When was this taken?"

"Not quite a year ago. But it was after the Titanic. This was one of the pictures that told me Jack had never left me."

"Oh, Rose…you must have been so happy when you noticed this." Jason grinned happily.

"Speaking of pictures, Jason, I have yet to take yours. You holding Jake like that…it’d be perfect."

"Oh, Rose, no. I’m a mess. There’s no way I can let you take my picture." Jason refused, standing up as Rose got her camera.

"Oh, nonsense. You look fine. Come on. Just one picture with you holding your little cousin. It can be a new picture to put up on that mantle of yours." Rose laughed.

"Okay." Jason sighed in defeat. "Where do you want me?"

"Over by the couch with Jake." Rose motioned, holding up the camera. Jason smiled just as the flash went off.

Two Weeks Later

Rose rushed over to Jake’s apartment with the newly developed picture.

"Rose, what are you doing here?" Jason asked once he opened the door.

"I thought you might want to see this." Rose handed Jason the picture Rose had taken of him in her apartment. Jason gasped when he examined the picture and noticed Jack standing beside him, a hand on his shoulder, looking down at Jake.

"It’s Jack," Jason gasped.

Rose nodded. "I knew you’d want a copy, so I had one made."

"Thank you, Rose." Jason took her in his arms. "Thank you so much! You don’t know how much this means to me!"

"I’ve got a pretty good idea." Rose smiled, leaning deeper into the embrace. Catching herself, she pulled away. She didn’t want Jason to get the wrong idea. "I’d better go. It’s getting late, and Jake’s waiting for me."

"Night, Rose." Jason returned his attention to the picture.

"Good night, Jason." Rose smiled, watching the gleam of fresh tears in his eyes. She knew she had done something good…even though it had brought her pain and caused her to have unwelcome feelings for a man who was so close to Jack.

Chapter Eight
Stories