ALL I NEED
Chapter Seven

I felt a soft, warm kiss on my lips that I returned with my eyes still closed. As the kiss ended, I opened my eyes slowly to find Harry finishing buttoning his officer’s coat. He was standing in front of me.

"Good evening, Sleeping Beauty," he said with a smile, and I looked around, realizing that I was still in his cabin, laying on his bed. "Time for you to take your last medicine of the day, and for me to head to the bridge for my shift."

"What time is it?" I asked quietly as I stood up, taking the pins out of my hair, the bun a mess because I had slept on it.

"It's almost midnight," he replied, and I froze. "What is the matter?"

"I should have gone to dinner." I walked around the cabin, pulling the pins out of my hair. "Oh, no. Cal will be so mad."

"Why? Because he wants you to eat?" He raised his eyebrows, watching me as I took my now loose hair and pulled it to the left side of my face. "You can order dinner now."

Harry was mature and very quick-witted, with all the right words to say. But he didn't know Cal. Of course, he didn't want me there because he wanted to make sure I ate. He wanted me there to parade me like some kind of rare porcelain doll.

"No. It's not that," I said as he walked towards the table, putting his hat on and taking one of my bottles of medicine out of the bag, preparing it for me to take. "He wanted me there because…well…apparently something is going on between Rose and a steerage boy."

"Oh, I heard about that," he said, literally putting the spoonful of bitter liquid in my mouth, as a mother did to a child. Then he handed me the glass of water. "She wanted to see the propellers," he said with a disbelieving smile. Of course, he didn't buy the story, either.

"Yes," I said, handing the glass back to him. "My brother pretended he bought her version of the facts and invited the boy to dinner, the blond boy who was with her today on deck." He nodded. "Anyway, Cal wanted me there to...I don't know. Support him?"

"I'm sure he didn't even notice you were not there. He seems much too preoccupied with his own little world to even notice the wonderful sister he has." He smiled, taking my hand and handing me the bag with the bottles. "Come on. I will escort you to the first class entrance."

*****

Harry escorted me, as he said, and I walked down the first flight of the Grand Staircase. There were a few stewards and servants around, but I didn't look around much. I headed to B-Deck and walked through the first class corridors, quickly finding my suite, taking the key out of the bag, and opening the door.

I entered the sitting room, closing the door behind me, and turned back in time to face Cal standing right in front of me. He was very, very serious. His face was contracted with anger. Mr. Lovejoy was in the corner of the room, away from us.

"You are such a little whore, aren't you?" he asked quietly, and I opened my mouth to answer, but he took my arm tightly and dragged me to my bedroom, throwing open the door.

"Cal! Cal...Cal, you're hurting me!" I tried to stay calm, but he had already thrown me with all his strength against the bed. I screamed in pain as I hit the nightstand and fell on the floor. Luckily, when I hit the bed, I managed to throw the bag with the bottles onto it, so it didn't fall on the floor and break.

"What's the matter with you?" I shouted, looking up at him in shock.

"You are not to behave like that, Catherine! Ever!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, almost snarling as he pointed to me on the floor. "Look at you! You're a Hockley! Yet you got yourself involved with a filthy, Goddamned ship’s officer and stayed in his bedroom with him the whole day, and almost the whole night if the bastard didn't have to work, I presume!" he yelled again.

By then, I had looked behind him and found Mr. Lovejoy quietly standing by the door. That son of a bitch. He had followed me. He had followed me and come to his own conclusions, telling Cal his version of the story.

"Goddammit! Look at me when I am talking to you!" He suddenly bent down and took my arm tightly, making me stand up.

I saw rage in his eyes, and for the first time in my life, I was really terrified of him. He was out of his mind, and Mr. Lovejoy was just there watching it, not doing a thing to help me!

"Cal, you--" I tried to speak with him, my voice trailing off, and I was abruptly interrupted by a very strong slap on my face. I turned my face to the side and he shook me, both hands gripping my arms.

"Shut up, Catherine!" he yelled, and I tried to look at him. When I turned my gaze at him, he slapped me again on the other side of my face. By then, I had started to cry with fright.

"Cal, stop it!" I begged him, my hair in my face as I cried, but once again, he slapped me. I could feel my heart almost jumping out of my mouth, pounding fast. I was shaking all over with fright. The blood in my veins moved fast, like a whip through my skin.

"I said shut up!" He gave me another slap. This time he threw me against the wardrobe. He was completely out of his mind.

I hit the wardrobe and fell on the floor. I could taste the hot blood in my mouth as I stared at the floor. I must have bitten the inside of my mouth from one of the slaps. I was kneeling on the floor, my hands supporting me and my head down. My long hair covered my face as I looked up at him again when I heard him step towards me.

"No, Cal! No!" I screamed as he took my arm, making me stand up again. "Cal, stop! Help!"

That was when Mr. Lovejoy finally moved. He got both of Cal's arms and pulled him away from me.

"Mr. Hockley, that's enough!" That was the first time I'd heard Mr. Lovejoy raise his voice. He shook Cal hard, as if trying to wake him up.

Cal's face suddenly changed, becoming calm. He stared at the floor for a moment as I distanced myself from him, sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling the hair off my face and looking at him in fright. I could still feel my heart pounding, and now I was sweating and shaking. I touched the corner of my lips on the right side to find a line of blood there.

"I will get Trudy for you, Miss Hockley," Mr. Lovejoy said calmly once again, looking at me. "Come on, Mr. Hockley." He tried to drag Cal out of the room, but he freed himself. I immediately crawled on top of the bed, distancing myself from him.

"You are engaged, Catherine." Cal's voice was low now, shaking a little bit. "I will not let you ruin the name of the family. You will stay here until the end of the voyage, locked in here. And I don't want you mentioning this to anyone, not even to our parents when we arrive in New York, or I will make your dear officer lose his job. Do you understand me? And the same applies if you start screaming for help."

"Cal, you can't do this to me!" I said hoarsely in an attempt to yell. I could not believe this was happening.

"Did you understand what I said, Catherine?" He ignored me, his voice rising a little again. I nodded in fright. With that, he turned around and left the room, but not before taking the key out of my lock and then closing the door from the sitting room and locking it.

I was so frightened that I didn't move from where I was. I slowly hugged my legs, still feeling my face hurting from Cal's strong slaps, and started to cry quietly, putting my chin on my knees. I needed Harry with me more than ever, and I knew that I couldn't have him.

*****

I heard the door unlocking a few minutes after the whole disaster. I was still in the same position and merely looked up to see Trudy quietly entering the room, carrying a tray with her. There I saw a plate with my dinner, a glass with water and another, smaller plate with something that looked like chocolate ice cream. There was also a vase with few dark red flowers. I knew she had prepared everything kindly for me.

"Miss?" she called, closing the door, locking it, and putting the key in one of her uniform pockets. "Oh, my God, Miss..." She looked pitifully at me when she saw me there on the bed. "Come here. Let me take care of you."

I slowly crawled to the end of the bed and sat there. She came towards me, carrying the tray with her. She was reluctant to touch my face, but I nodded for her to go on. And so she did.

"Oh, Miss, I'm sorry," she said as she slowly touched my face, even though it hurt and I shivered.

"It's all right," I said quietly. She went down into the bathroom and brought out a ceramic bowl of hot, steaming water, putting it on the nightstand beside me and taking a piece of cloth. Wetting the cloth a little, she started to slowly wipe my face with the damp cloth. I could feel my face burning with pain, but I held on tight.

"Can you open your mouth?" she asked after drying my face with another piece of cloth. I opened it. She looked inside. "Well, you just bit the inside of your cheek a little. It's not bleeding anymore."

"Thank you, Trudy," I said quietly, and she nodded, putting the bowl and the pieces of cloth back in the bathroom. "Not to worry, Miss. I will leave your dinner here and I will prepare you a bath while you eat."

"Trudy?" I asked as she started to turn around to leave. "My brother threatened you if you helped me get out of here, didn't he? He said you would lose your job, didn't he?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry, Miss. I can't help you. I will come here every day to take care of you, but I can't take messages or let you leave the room. Please understand," she said.

"Of course. Don't worry." I nodded, and she smiled weakly. I knew she wanted to help me, but she turned and went into my bathroom.

I sighed and started to eat slowly. The meal tasted worse than it had ever tasted. The lights hurt my eyes. The sounds coming from the other rooms were irritating my ears. My mind was spinning and my head ached as if a bomb had exploded. I had no way out. My lever had been pulled again, but this time, not by me.

Chapter Eight
Stories