OLIVIA
Chapter Eleven
Olivia quietly closed the door to
her sitting room behind her. Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, but she
refused to let them. She walked over to the dressing table and sat down on the
cushioned bench. Her reflection caught her attention. Her eyes were wide and
her face pale. She looked like she felt…numb.
Every time she closed her eyes,
she saw her husband clutching the photograph of his beloved Rose. Betrayal,
anger, and resentment flooded her until she could no longer hold it back. She
grabbed a bottle of perfume as she stood and flung it across the room with a
frustrated scream. After the release of it, she fell to the floor in a crumpled
heap and cried uncontrollably until there was nothing left in her but dry,
hacking sobs.
Every hope and dream she had fell
away as she realized that she had never had Cal’s love. It was a sham, a cruel
hoax, and it hurt more than she thought possible. It wasn’t fair. It just
wasn’t fair. She had trusted him, and more than that, she loved him. She still
did, in spite of it all. Oh, dear God, what was she going to do? How could she
stay, and yet, how could she leave? She was carrying his child, the Hockley
heir. She was trapped–trapped in a marriage that was nothing but a lie.
Grasping the bench, she pulled
herself to standing and tried to compose herself as best she could. A light tap
on the door startled her.
"Who is it?" she asked,
wiping the remaining tears from her cheeks.
"Angelina, ma’am," came
the response. "I thought I heard something. Are you all right?"
Taking a calming breath, she
padded over to the door and opened it. Upon seeing the girl’s concerned face,
she smiled to mask her feelings. "I’m fine, Angelina. Nothing to worry
about, I assure you."
The girl nodded, but Olivia
couldn’t be sure if she believed her or not. She knew the servants loved to
gossip among themselves, and she would rather not give them anymore fodder than
she had to. She started to turn and shut the door, but stopped. "Could you
please have a tray sent up? I’m still not feeling well and I’d rather not eat
downstairs this morning."
"Yes, ma’am." Angelina
gave a small curtsy. "Will Mr. Hockley be joining you?"
Olivia paused for a moment before
answering. "No. I will be eating alone." With that, she shut the door
and leaned back against it. She couldn’t face Cal just yet. It would be too
hard. Her emotions were too raw at the moment.
She quickly dressed in a loose
apricot caftan, pulled her hair back, and secured it with a matching ribbon.
She had no intention of leaving her room today, so there was no need to dress
in her usual manner. She was sitting on her chaise in front of one of the large
windows when she heard the door open. Fully expecting to see Angelina, it was
Cal who was bearing her tray instead.
"Good morning,
sweetling." He smiled as he pushed the door shut with his foot. "I
intercepted Angelina." He held up the tray toward her.
Olivia could feel her heart
thumping loudly in her ears as he approached and set the tray down on her lap.
"I hope you slept well after
your incident last night."
She couldn’t answer for a moment.
She knew she had to remain calm. She couldn’t let Cal see how upset she was. As
she looked down at the food on the tray, it suddenly looked extremely
unappetizing.
"Olivia?" he prompted.
"Yes, I…I slept fine,"
she finally answered.
Seemingly satisfied with her
answer, he took the yellow linen napkin on the tray, shook it out, and spread
it across her midriff. "I slept in one of the guest rooms so as not to
disturb you."
Liar! she cried in her mind. She couldn’t bear
to look at him, so she turned her head away to look at some unknown point out
of the window.
"You still look a little
pale this morning. I will have Dr. Covington come to look you over to make sure
everything is all right."
When she didn’t answer, he hooked
her chin with his finger and guided her face around to meet his. "Are you
sure everything is all right, Olivia? You seem out of sorts. Is there something
you’re not telling me?"
She licked her dry lips before
answering. "No, Cal. I’m just not feeling well, that’s all."
Frowning at her, he leaned back
and studied her features. "You are keeping something from me. Is it about
last night? Did you remember what happened before you were found outside
unconscious?"
"No." She shook her
head. "I don’t remember what happened. I told you that."
"You aren’t being truthful
with me, Olivia," he said in a low, callous purr.
She looked up at him, and the
image of him holding Rose’s picture invaded her mind. She wanted to scream it out
at him, to tell him what she saw and that she knew that their marriage was a
lie. She wanted to lash out at him, to hurt him the way she was hurting, but
she couldn’t. She was too afraid of his reaction.
"I’m not being untruthful,
Cal," she finally answered. "I guess I’m weaker than I thought from
everything that happened last night."
He stared at her for a few
minutes more and then lifted his head slightly. "Very well, but don’t
forget my warning. If I find that you have lied to me, I won’t be so forgiving.
I must be able to trust you, Olivia. After all, you are carrying my son, the
heir to the Hockley name."
Her eyes snapped then. "Why
are you so sure this is going to be a son?"
He laughed as if she had asked
the most ridiculous question. "Because, sweetling, I choose for it to be
so."
Olivia cringed when he leaned
over and kissed her on the forehead.
"Enjoy your breakfast. I
shall be out for most of the day. Dr. Covington will be along after a while to
check on you." He stood, straightened out his suit, and smiled unflappably
down at her.
She watched as he strode casually
across the room and exited it. Between the tension she felt and the aroma of
the food before her, her stomach began to roll violently. She pushed it aside
and stood, barely reaching the chamber pot before she was sick.
After a few minutes, she leaned
back and wiped her face with the linen napkin. Glancing around the room, she
felt so alone. In that moment, she would gladly have given up everything to be
free from this life. She was only nineteen, and already her life was over.
Everything she believed in was gone and she was left with nothing but this
empty, cold feeling. How ironic that only a few short months ago, she thought
she was living a fairytale, and now nothing could be further from the truth.
Nothing at all.