ROMANOV AUTUMN
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Over the next few weeks, Alyiah's
symptoms seemed to worsen rather than improve. She remained on bed rest per the
doctor's orders, who seemed just as puzzled as Jack by the amount of pain and
discomfort.
"We'll keep an eye on
her," he explained, noticing the worry on Jack's face. "Don't blame
yourself," he added.
Jack nodded, though it wasn't
going to be easy. After all, if it hadn't been for his help, Alyiah wouldn't
have become pregnant at all. It was difficult not to share some of the blame.
When the doctor had gone, he sat with Alyiah while he did his work. He had
taken time off from the hotel due to Alyiah's condition, not wanting her to be
alone.
"You should not have to do
this," she said as she sat up with him. He kissed her softly, brushing her
hair away from her face.
"We'll be all right with the
money we've saved," he replied. "Now, I'm concerned for you."
Alyiah sighed, looking at her
still mostly flat stomach. Despite feeling so miserable, she was thrilled to
have a chance for another baby.
"I want you to be happy
also, Jack," she said, and he smiled.
"I'm working on my art and
seeing you every day--that is all I really need," he answered, and Alyiah
smiled, reaching up to touch his face.
"I think I have remembered
where I heard the name Macena," she said, and he raised his eyebrows
curiously.
"Where?" he asked, and
she glanced at the window for a moment.
"Remember when you brought
me to Ireland? It was the name of the innkeeper who housed us...I remember
thinking how unusual the name sounded."
Jack leaned back. "You
know," he continued, "I do like Macena--we could call her Mac for
short."
Alyiah laughed, though she
stopped when it caused a bit of pain. "Yes, Mac and Jack--it is like a
nursery rhyme pair." She squeezed his arm.
"We can't get too hopeful
our baby will be a girl," he said as he stretched his arms over his head.
"It could be a boy, you know."
Alyiah shook her head. "I
can feel that we'll have a girl. I--everything about me is different than last
time." She shrugged. "It is hard to describe."
Jack took her hand. "Well,
then," he said softly, "we'll pray for a girl."
Alyiah nodded before her eyes
closed, and she announced that she would be dozing for a bit.
"If you need me, just
call," Jack insisted, kissing her again before deciding to make a cup of
tea. He usually had tea at night and coffee in the morning. Alyiah, however,
did not like the taste of coffee, so she usually had tea, or hot water with
lemon if they were out of tea.
Jack took his mug into the
parlor, where he could stare through the large windows overlooking the wide,
sloping yard. There was nothing like the comfort of being home again, though he
hadn't lost the urge to travel. He wanted to return to Europe and visit the countries
he had missed before. When Alyiah had the baby, he would bring them both, and
make certain to visit Russia to show Macena off to her grandparents.
Jack watched as the sky darkened
early as it always did in the fall, and lit a candle for his reading light. His
parents never used any electrical devices, wanting to remain simplistic and
closer to God. His mother was still influential in her Amish ways, and it was
certainly inexpensive. He sat up drawing until the candle died before heading
to bed.
*****
As Alyiah went through the next
couple of months, she began to improve considerably. Her stomach was growing
quite large around Christmas, and Jack insisted he draw a portrait of her in
that condition.
"I am hideous." She
laughed. "I do hope you do not plan on selling this."
He grinned, shaking his head.
"Alyiah, you look more beautiful than ever. And I must have a solid memory
of this moment."
He finally convinced her to pose
for him on the chair in their bedroom, wearing only her dressing gown. Alyiah
smiled as his hands flew across the page, pleased by the pride radiating from
him.
Alyiah finished knitting a baby
blanket by Christmas Eve, insisting it be used to wrap their newborn infant.
Jack fingered the soft wool between his fingers...he prayed every night that
things would go smoothly.
Due to Alyiah's health, though,
Christmas was not the usual lavish affair. They remained home this year, and
Olivia cooked for them as her gift, while Esther instructed Jack and Alyiah on
child care.
"Of course, the only experience
I have had is raising you," Esther admitted.
Alyiah chuckled, feeing Jack wrap
his arms around her waist.
*****
In February, Jack came down with
influenza, which kept him bedridden for two weeks. He didn't want Alyiah in the
house, so she remained with Esther while Olivia played his sick nurse. He went
through a rather bad spell with his asthma, but with the administration of
herbs and rest, he felt better.
In the spring, around mid-April,
Alyiah began to feel unwell again herself. Jack returned home to find her
unconscious on the parlor floor and was immediately on his knees beside her.
He managed to get her into bed
after a while, though she was rather delirious.
It wasn't until the doctor
arrived that Alyiah finally opened her eyes, complaining of a terrible sense of
dizziness and nausea. Her lower abdomen screamed with pain when she tried to
sit, and the cry it produced tore Jack's heart.
"The baby is going to be
arriving soon," Dr. Owen told Jack. "I fear we may have to go in and
get it...if she does not improve by the time the labor begins."
Jack felt helpless watching his
wife lying in a comatose state, her eyes glazed with fever. Olivia sat with her
sister-in-law, blotting the older woman's face with a damp rag, trying to give
her brother any assistance she could.
"What are her chances
if..." Jack cleared his throat. "I'm sorry," he apologized,
turning away, and clasped a hand against his forehead. This had to be a
nightmare, a terrible nightmare...Alyiah couldn't be--he refused to think the
word.
"I'm going to be honest,
Jack, because the situation is a bit of a dead end either way," Dr. Owen
admitted.
Jack swallowed anxiously before
excusing himself to step outside for a breath of fresh air. If Alyiah died,
would he be able to raise the baby on his own? He was terrified at the prospect
of losing the woman he loved, unsure of what to do.
He jumped when the front door
opened and looked up to see Olivia watching him with concern in her eyes. She
was so grown up for just thirteen years old, and he could see how closely she
resembled their real mother.
"How are you?" she
asked, sitting on the steps beside him, and he shook his head.
"I don't know," he
admitted, and she immediately embraced him, letting him bury his face against
her shoulder.
"What did we do to deserve
this?" he choked. "I don't know what I'd do if..." He took a
deep breath. "I'm so scared," he added. "I can't--I can't raise
a baby by myself. I can't..."
Olivia squeezed his hand.
"Don't think like that," she begged. "Miracles happen, and it
may be that she turns out fine."
He paused to sneeze, accepting a
handkerchief. "She's in so much pain," he added. "I almost wish
there was a way to take this back, but--" He glanced at the sky, which was
slowly turning a mix of orange and pink. "Seeing her so happy when she
finally became pregnant was really worth it."
Olivia smiled. "We're all
praying, Jack."
He looked at her, giving her a
kiss on the forehead. "You look so much like Ma," he admitted, and
she grinned.
"Really?" she asked.
"Am I pretty, Jack?"
He chuckled as they stood,
preparing to go back inside. "You're beautiful," he replied. He heard
Alyiah give a cry from upstairs and took off for the sick room.
Dr. Owen was massaging her
stomach when he arrived, trying to relieve some of the tension. Alyiah grabbed
Jack's hand when he came to her bedside, and he realized her pillow was
drenched with sweat.
"What are you doing?"
he demanded, and Dr. Owen ceased his work.
"Trying to relax the
muscles--they are very tight," he explained, shaking his head. "I
think it's best if I stay--"
Olivia bit her lip. "I can
take care of her," she insisted, and Jack touched her arm.
"Esther needs your
help," he reminded her, and Olivia pouted.
"I want to be here when the
baby comes," Olivia begged, and Dr. Owen smiled.
"It is too dangerous for a
young lass like yourself to be involved," he replied, and Olivia lowered
her head, receiving a pat on the shoulder. She knew better than to argue, and
decided to step aside for the time being.
The next couple of nights were
the longest Jack had ever spent in his life. He and the doctor watched over
Alyiah hour after hour, trying to make her as comfortable as possible. Her
fever worsened, making her delirious most of the time.
"Any day now," Dr. Owen
told Jack, who wasn't sure if he should feel relief about this or dread. He was
so tired and scared--he was losing Alyiah with every painful breath she took.
"Go and rest, lad," the
doctor encouraged him. "It won't do us any good if you pass out on
us."
Jack wanted to protest--Alyiah
needed him, but his mind was so cloudy with exhaustion. He kissed her forehead
before making the doctor swear to let him know if there was any change.
It wasn't until early in the
morning on May tenth that Alyiah went into labor. The cries were deafening, and
at one point, Jack prayed for some form--any form--of relief. Olivia came to
offer her assistance, covering the lower half of the bed with towels. Jack had
to leave the room after a while, anxiety getting the better of him. He sat in
the parlor, his face in his hands.
Around noon on May eleventh,
Alyiah gave birth to a healthy, wailing daughter. Unfortunately, she lost a
dangerous amount of blood in the process, and passed away by midnight.
When Olivia offered to hand Macena
to Jack following the death, he turned away, unable to bear the sight of the
infant.
"Jack," Olivia pleaded.
"Don't..."
He stormed off and shut himself
into the study, resting his head against the door. Alyiah was dead--how could
this be?
Anger billowed inside of him
after a few minutes of silence, and he snatched the double-headed eagle from
the desktop. With one motion he threw it across the room, watching as the gold
artifact shattered into a cluster of gold pieces.