A SIMPLE SOLUTION
Chapter Nineteen
"Rose…sweetheart…come on, open your
eyes…"
Sleepily, Rose lifted her head to look into
Jack's eyes. He was smiling, but there was a sad tinge in his expression and
she shot up in bed, moving her body to place her naked feet on the drafty
floor. His hand came over her hand and she felt him looking meaningfully at
her.
"I know, stay in bed, Rose," she
whispered in annoyance, turning her head to look at him. "What's wrong?
You look like…oh no, he isn't…there's still a chance, right? Right?"
Jack merely shook his head, looking down at
her hand, as his fingers kept moving up and down over her skin.
"He's…the doctor was just here and he…he
said it was a matter of hours now."
Rose sat up and, ignoring his gentle hands
trying to push her back into the bed, she moved closer to him, hugging him
tightly and eventually, she felt him starting to sob, his strong, safe body
shaking in hers.
"Shh…it's okay, Jack. It's okay…I'm
here." She rocked him from side to side for a moment, feeling how he clung
to her, buried himself in her arms, and then, abruptly, he pulled back, smiling
awkwardly at her.
"I'm sorry I…upset you. I…just…"
"Jack, it's okay. You need comfort just
as much as I do sometimes." Softly, her fingers touched his cheeks as she
wiped away the forgotten, salty tears from his eyes.
"Thank you," he breathed, closing
his eyes, picking up her hand to kiss it. "I just…Fabrizio has Helga and
Tommy in there now and he was asking for you. Are you up to it? It's gonna be
pretty tough, sitting there with him…as he dies…but he…wanted us all with
him."
"I'll be okay."
She swallowed the rest of her feelings into
the usual box where she stored them, determined to hide her true sadness and
worry from him. She had to be strong this time. He needed her. Probably more
than Fabrizio needed her there. She needed to be there to pick up the pieces.
Helga had Tommy. Jack had no one if she wasn't there.
"Let's go."
Jack grinned unexpectedly. "Oh no you
don't. If you're going in there, I'm carrying you. Remember what the Doc said?
No…"
"Leaving the bed. I know. But carry me?
Isn't that a bit exaggerated? I've…" She bit her lip and looked down
quickly. He looked a bit puzzled, but didn't ask her what she had been about to
say.
She looked up nervously, hoping that he
wouldn't have noticed. The truth was that she had been to Fabrizio's room a few
times the past month, Helga supporting her, to give Rose the illusion that she
wasn't doing anything too strenuous. After all, she went to the bathroom like
that, only with Jack, who could support her better.
"I mean…okay, carry me then."
Smiling, he picked her up, groaning a bit
under her weight. "I told you this wouldn't work. I'm fat and heavy
and…"
"Shh…you have our baby inside. That's
not being fat."
Rose smiled, thinking about how being in bed
this past month had been very good for her. She wasn't as tired anymore and she
didn't get as many cramps and most importantly, she hadn't been bleeding
anymore. The baby moved a lot and she was thankful that none of the things she
had been through had affected her and Jack's baby.
It was November now and she was two months
from having the baby. Molly had gotten her a job as a tutor to a young, very
frightened school girl, who was reading classic books and seemed to have
problems understanding the deeper meaning. Rose had tried to explain to her
what she was supposed to think about them and then told her that she could form
her own opinion, too, that there was never only one interpretation.
She had also made it clear to the girl how
lucky she was to be able to learn those things, that most young girls only
learned how to take care of a family and how to cook. Now, the young Emily was
much more secure of herself and she even went to her lessons with Rose with a
huge smile on her face and she had stopped being deadly afraid of Rose's
growing stomach.
"Here we go."
Jack carefully set her feet back down on the
floor and grabbed her hands as she started falling to the side.
"Forgetting how to keep your balance
already?" He smiled teasingly and she just grumbled, mumbling something
about certain people tying her to the bed.
But their smiles vanished when they saw
Fabrizio lying motionless on the bed, Helga lying next to him, her arms wrapped
around his still body tightly and Tommy, sitting next to the bed. Rose took a
few steps closer and Jack pulled up a chair for her, on which she gratefully
sank down.
They sat quietly for what seemed like forever
and then Fabrizio opened his eyes, smiling weakly when he saw Jack, Rose, and
Tommy.
"Nice to…see you all here," he
managed to get out, his voice tired and his breaths very forced and heavily
clogged with both fever and blood.
Tommy smiled, squeezing Fabrizio's limp hand.
Helga kissed his forehead and Rose saw tears flowing down Helga's cheeks.
Rose moved her chair closer and took
Fabrizio's other hand, softly stroking it. He closed his eyes again and his
breaths were increasingly unsteady. Jack leaned closer to hold Fabrizio's hand
together with Rose.
"I…wanted so bad to come here and be a
millionaire," Fabrizio mumbled, causing new tears to fill Jack's eyes and
Rose felt his shaking hand on her shoulder, making her take it softly, hating
the fact that he was in pain.
"Helga, I love you." Helga looked
at her dying fiancé, tears escaping her red eyes.
"Fabri…I love you…I'm sorry. I love you
so much," she whispered, placing soft kisses on his cheek as a serene
smile appeared on his face.
"Not your fault," he got out before
pushing his eyelids open again and he looked at them all, feeling how he was
starting to fade away and the pain was vanishing slowly.
"Best friends ever," he mouthed and
then his breaths slowed even more and he gave a quiet sigh, tears running down
his white cheeks.
Tommy got up and carefully closed Fabrizio's
open eyes, tenderly pushing his mouth shut too. Helga sobbed uncontrollably and
Rose got up, ignoring Jack's hands on her shoulders and sat down on the bed
instead, hugging Helga's sobbing form tightly. In her mind, she thought about
how she would feel if Jack had been the one dying and the pain that flowed
through her at that was unbearable.
"Rose…hold me, please," Helga
whispered, embracing Rose tightly, her arms thin and weak around Rose's body.
*****
Helga was in the bed where Fabrizio had died
and Tommy was sitting out in the living room with Jack and Rose. They were
quiet and Rose heard Helga sobbing softly. She pushed herself up off the couch,
feeling Jack's hands over her back as he helped her up.
"I'm gonna…go to her," she whispered
and waddled slowly to Helga, sitting down next to the other woman, stroking her
back gently, knowing that there was nothing she could say to ease the pain.
Jack watched her go, his blue eyes still full
of redness and tears.
"I wish there was something we could do
to help her," he said and Tommy nodded, agreeing. "To think that
Fabri's life had to end like this. I just…it's not fair, Tommy. He deserved to
marry Helga and have children with her and…live happily ever after."
"I know."
They had been sitting there since the
ambulance had taken Fabrizio's body. No one was hungry, even though it was well
past lunchtime.
Rose held Helga gently, stroking back the
tangled blond hair from her blue eyes. Helga smiled softly and looked up at
Rose.
"Thank you…you have no idea how much
this means to me."
"Hey…we're friends. You'd do the same
for me." But at that tears appeared in the corners of Rose's eyes and she
swallowed, feeling how Helga sat up and they sat close to each other on the
warm bed.
"Yes, I would, Rose…but I'm the one…I
brought everything bad here. Sven…he could have shot you, too, or Jack. You
could have lost the baby. I'm so sorry. I…"
"It was Sven's fault, not yours. I don't
blame you, Helga, I never have," Rose whispered, feeling a bit surprised
that Helga felt that guilty.
"No, I know you don't. But I…it was
almost so bad that I couldn't even dial the number to call an ambulance…I…I was
so upset. And you, pregnant and everything, you managed to take care of
Fabrizio better than I could."
Tears overflowed her eyes and she swallowed
hard, not noticing that Rose was almost gaping in surprise.
"No…no, Helga, you couldn't have known
what was going to happen and…you know what, if Jack had been shot for me…I
wouldn't have been able to move, not think, not breathe, not anything. You were
just…in shock."
Helga's blue eyes were still wet with tears,
but a light of understanding suddenly was beginning to shine and she sighed in
relief.
"Thank you, Rose. Thank you so
much…" She hugged Rose so tightly that Rose yelped out in pain and Helga
pulled back, smiling sheepishly.
"Sorry."
"It's okay…I just feel a bit sore right
now. I cannot wait until this baby is out of me. Then I can leave the house
without having Jack following me like a nervous hawk."
Helga laughed and Rose joined her, softly
grabbing one of Helga's hands. "You want to feel?" she asked, the
laughter fading into a soft smile. Helga nodded and her blue eyes filled with
wonder as she felt the small feet and hands touch the inside of Rose's stomach.
"I…I always wanted children…when I was
with Sven, all I ever wanted was to have a baby with Fabrizio. And now…I…I
wished that we had been blessed with a baby now, but it…it wasn't to be."
Rose looked at her intently. "You mean
you could have been pregnant?"
Helga nodded, blushing. "I know, I
know…we weren't married yet, but…no damage is done," she said, laughing
hollowly. "No baby is growing in here," she sighed, stroking her own
flat stomach.
Sadly, Rose touched Helga's hair, wishing
there was some way to make Helga's pain easier.
"You will…you will be okay…you'll meet
someone some day and have lots and lots of babies. Fabrizio…he would have
wanted that."
"I know," Helga breathed, new tears
running down her cheeks.
"Jack and I…we discussed something the
other day and I want to tell you about that. We were talking about names for
the baby and…if it's a boy, he's going to be called Alexander Fabrizio."
Helga smiled through her tears and Rose drew
a sigh of relief, glad that it had been the right thing to say.
"Oh Rose, I'm so glad. Thank you.
Fabrizio would love that." She smiled, but through her tears she yawned
slightly and then looked up at Rose, chuckling.
"I think I'm going to get some sleep
now. I have a feeling I need it."
Rose nodded, agreeing. Her hands gently
pulled the covers over Helga, noticing with worry how thin Helga had gotten.
"When you wake up, I'll ask Jack to help
me bring you something to eat, okay?"
Helga nodded and Rose left the room quietly,
closing the door with a thoughtful expression on her face.
"Rose? Are you okay?"
Jack of course. He was standing in front of
her, prepared to hold her in his arms in case she needed it.
"I'm fine. Just…hungry I guess. She's
sleeping." She sank down on the couch, her hands rigid over her stomach, causing
both men to look at her with concern.
"You feeling okay, Rose?" Tommy
asked, knowing what a difficult pregnancy it was and how Jack had struggled to
keep her from worrying and taking too many risks.
"Yes. I just…I feel sorry for her. She
feels to guilty about Fabrizio and even me."
"What do you mean?"
"That I almost…lost the baby. She thinks
it's her fault."
Jack kneeled down next to her, clasping her
hands softly together with his.
"That's just wrong. I…was angry at the
time with her, but I know she was in shock and the only one who can be blamed
for it is Sven."
"I know. I told her that. I also…I also
told her what we are going to name the baby if it's a boy."
Jack grinned and pulled her into his arms
gently, feeling utterly thankful that she was still in his arms. The baby
kicked hard suddenly, causing both Rose and Jack to wince. Rose giggled softly
and laid her head on Jack's shoulder as his embrace tightened.
"Oh…time pass quickly, I want to hold
you in my arms soon, too," he whispered, causing tears of happiness to
escape her eyes. "Soon, Jack, soon…we'll be a real family…and I'll be able
to live again!" Jack laughed quietly, stroking her swelling stomach as the
kicks slowed down into soft movements.