A SIMPLE SOLUTION
Chapter Twenty-One
Ruth looked at Jack nervously and then shook
her head once more. Cal would kill her if she let him in. She couldn't. Even if
her heart and soul screamed at her to let Jack in to see his wife, to be with
her when she needed him. And she did. Badly.
"No. He…he shouldn't be there. She's…very…she's
in labor and it's…hard on her. She's bleeding a lot." A lot was an
understatement. The nurse said it was a miracle she was still alive.
Jack took a deep breath, resting his hand on
the wall separating him from Rose. This was all his fault. She was pregnant
because of him. She was in there, bleeding to death because of him.
"Please…she needs me. I can feel it.
Please," he whispered, but the strain of having to listen to Rose's fading
cries was starting to affect his voice and his words cracked as he ran a sweaty
hand through his hair, looking straight into Ruth's eyes.
But Ruth just smiled sadly at him and then
unlocked the door to Rose's room and disappeared. Molly and Jack heard a key
turning in the lock.
"Dammit," Jack cursed, but Molly
heard the tears in his voice and tried to support him again as he tried to
stand upright. He shrugged her away and was just about to throw his body
against the door in an effort to open it when Molly's hand pulled him back.
"What?" he exclaimed. "I have
to…I have to be there with her. I…I have to…I can't bear this. I have to see
her face and I know she needs me."
"She does, Jack, but since Ruth won't
let you in, you can't go inside like this. She'll notice, Jack and she'll be
even more stressed. She needs peace and calm right now. The best thing you can
do is wait here. She'll know you're here. Ruth will tell her."
"No, she won't," Jack whispered,
the anger fading from his voice, being replaced by worry and fear.
"Molly…I know…I shouldn't upset her,
but…she needs me so much and I can't stand to think about…her going through
that alone, with her mother there. She…sold her own daughter to Cal and you
think I should let her be the only one with Rose right now? She needs me. I need
her…" He leaned his face into his hands, sobbing for a second or two,
before pulling himself together. He had to stay strong.
"It's okay, Jack," Molly said,
leading him to the couch outside the room, rubbing his back in an effort to
keep him calm. Every time Rose cried out, or gasped, or there was a deadly
silence that stayed for too long, Jack winced and held his hand over his chest,
as if he was going to have a heart attack.
Molly could only watch him, realizing for the
first time just how strong Jack and Rose's love was. If Rose died…she would
have to pick up the pieces of the man who used to be Jack. Rose had to
survive…she and Jack were like her own children…she just had to be okay.
*****
"Where is she? Where the hell is she? Is
she all right? Is she…oh God, just tell me where she is!"
Rose's consciousness returned fully for the
first time since her labor had started and she stared in confusion at Cal's and
the nurse's face. She had been screaming even in the state of being in that
black, fuzzy place, but hadn't been aware of what was happening.
Now she was and…that had been Jack's voice.
Jack. She turned her head painfully, panting with excruciating difficulty as
she saw Jack's face in the doorway. Jack. But someone pushed him away now and
she swallowed hard.
"Jack."
Cal's cold hand was on her face now and her
eyes snapped open again as she moved her face to the side, anything to avoid
him.
"Oh, Rose, don't worry, this will all be
over soon and we'll get rid of that baby and you'll come home with your mother
and me. Jack will simply have to go on without you after you tell him that you
prefer me. Don't worry…" He smiled smugly at her and she was left
speechless. "I won't hold it against you that you slept with that boy. Or
even that you had his baby. But of course, we both know it could be mine,
too."
Rose almost lost touch with the pain now and
she sat up abruptly in the bed, grabbing his collar as she pulled him down to
her.
"You unimaginable bastard. I would
never…never have your child. Never. This is Jack's child. Jack's and I…I will
never agree to this."
"Oh, you won't have to. I've decided for
you. Besides, it can't be that much fun to be a whore to that gutter rat, now
can it?"
Rose felt the last air escape her lungs and
she almost fell back on the pillows. A new pain grabbed her badly bruised
abdomen and she groaned, but didn't let go of Cal.
"I'd rather be his whore than your
wife!" she exclaimed with surprising strength and then spit him straight
in the eye. Jack taught her how to…that sunny day on Titanic. She smiled
weakly.
As she had expected he backed away and then
came closer, shaking her violently, making her already aching body feel like it
was being torn in two.
"I always win, Rose. Always. I don't
want you anymore. I never wanted to marry you. But I can't…" She saw him
clench his fists in focused rage, his face as pale as her own. Sweat was
dripping from his forehead and he leaned closer. "I can't let him win,
Rose. I always win. One way or the other."
Oh dear God, he's even crazier than I thought.
Jack…Jack, I wish I had listened to you. Dammit. How could I be this stupid to
come here? I've put the baby in danger and myself in danger and…Jack…if Cal
finds him…this hurts like hell…it's so difficult to breathe…am I even going to
keep my eyes open when the baby is here? Will I be alive…?
His hands closed around her throat and she
tried to push him away, her hands feeling like jelly, she couldn't fight him.
He was too strong. Gasping for breath, she heard how her breathing slowed and
turned into a sickening wheezing noise.
"Jack," she whispered, falling into
the pillow again, her face first as her breaths continued slowing down. I am
going to die now. I can't breathe. Then…a voice…saving her…Cal's hands were
gone.
"Mr. Hockley, will you please step
aside. I don't care what you and the young lady have in the past or in the
future, but she is in the throes of childbirth and it's not easy on her. Your
behavior might cause her to die." The nurse brusquely shoved him to the
side and she softly touched Rose's face, making her look up again.
"Now, Rose, I need you to push, okay?
Can you do that?"
Rose looked blankly at her, her face now a
grayish tone and her eyes glazed with exhaustion.
"I don't know," she mouthed,
closing her eyes.
"Rose, you've got to, come on, think
about your baby. It needs you to be strong."
My baby…I have to…I can't let her die. I
can't let him die. I've wanted the baby so much since the day I found out. I've
always loved the baby. Jack and I…someone we created. Those days on
Titanic…when we were happy…
Rose's thoughts were broken when she felt the
pain intensify and she breathed hard, feeling blood escaping her more and more.
There was probably a huge pool under her weak body and she…she would never see
the baby. She struggled for breath.
"I can't."
Only a whisper, barely that. But the nurse
heard and Rose felt her rubbing her face with a wet cloth. She looked at the
nurse, her eyes open, but somehow not seeing anything and each breath was more
painful than the one before.
"For your own sake."
"I can't." Her body convulsed
violently, but she barely made a move, barely showed the nurse that she had
felt it. She just stared into nothingness, breathing shallowly.
"For the baby's father. He's out there,
honey."
The nurse was whispering now and Rose knew
that she wasn't supposed to tell her that. Cal and Ruth had probably tried to
keep Jack from her. He is there…I knew it. Jack, please don't worry about
me. I'll be okay. And if I'm not…take care of the baby. Take care of our
baby…please…Jack…please…remember our dreams for the baby…going away from New
York…you thought I didn't know your plans…but I was so happy. Going back to
Paris maybe…having fun…just you and I and the baby.
"For the baby's father, honey."
"I'll try," Rose whispered and
summoned up the last of her strength, as the nurse bore down on her stomach,
making her close her eyes, screaming inwardly at the forces that seemed to
break her body and her soul.
Finally a tiny scream filled the room. Rose
fell back on the pillows, breathing so heavily that she felt as if her lungs
would explode. She looked up tiredly, wanting to see the baby. Just as she
caught a glimpse of the tiny head, she felt the pain continuing to gnaw at her
insides. Oh God, when does it end?
"Rose, Rose, push again, come on, you
can do it. There's another baby…another baby, honey…push, come on."
Rose closed her eyes, feeling how her curls
stuck to her neck and how the sweat beads were mixing with her tears. The nurse
was pulling at something below her stomach and she swallowed hard, feeling how
she was starting to feel sick.
I can't do this. Jack. I need you. I
thought it was over now and I can't…I just can't.
But she did. The nurse told her to push again
and again and again and Rose did. Rose screamed hoarsely before letting the
pain explode inside of her again and then…another tiny scream filled her head.
This one faded away soon and Rose fell back
on the bed once more, this time in a twisted position, her head laying still on
her shoulder and her legs bent around the huge blood pool spreading over the
bed. Her breaths were unsteady and fading.
Jack…I want you here. Jack…
*****
Ruth wrapped the cold baby in a piece of
cloth, icy tears streaming down her wrinkled face. Twins. Who had known? Rose
hadn't. Molly hadn't. Jack hadn't. Ruth swallowed hard as she tried to prepare
herself for what she had to do. Jack had to be told about what had happened.
She picked up the other baby, the one still
squirming and alive and left Cal alone in the room.
Jack was sitting outside, but quickly jumped
to his feet when he saw Ruth and the baby. A smile temporarily lit his face,
but it died quickly. Ruth knew why. He was happy to see the baby, but his chief
concern was his wife. Oh, Rose, what a husband. If my husband had seen the baby
and known it was a son, he wouldn't have given a damn about me.
"Is she…can I see her?"
"Jack…I'm afraid, she…she died. There
was nothing we could do. She lost too much blood and she was too tired. She…she
had twins, Jack. It was just too much for her. The little…the little baby girl
died, too."
Jack fell back, crumbling to the ground,
staying up only because Molly had grabbed him and held him securely now.
"No…no…she can't be gone. No…you're
lying. Please…I can't…" He sank to his knees and now even Molly couldn't
hold him up. He sobbed as he sat there, his hands and arms and legs completely
limp until slowly his hands clenched into angry fists. "Rose…Rose!
ROSE!" he yelled, breaking each time he reached the end of her name and
leaning his face in his hands, sobbing violently.
Molly stepped closer to Ruth, grabbing her
shoulders gently.
"Ruth, is she really dead? I don't want
you to lie to this boy just to force your poor daughter to marry Cal."
Ruth nodded, staring at the tiny baby in her
arms.
"She was too sick, Molly, she died. The
nurse…she said that Rose had the measles, too and that…that was what made her
even weaker. She was so strong, Molly, she would have survived if only she
hadn't been sick. She was my daughter, do you think I would lie about something
like this?"
Molly believed her. Now she had to make sure
Jack didn't see the body. He would go completely off the deep end if he saw his
wife like that.
"I want to see her," Jack said in a
broken voice, looking blankly at the two women, as he walked up to the door.
Measles…she had caught that disease anyway…had she seemed unusually tired these
past days? Had she? Had she had a cold? Jack didn't know. His head spun so
violently that all he could see was her face, her beautiful face, soulful eyes
and laughing smile. She was dancing with him again…twirling around, laughing.
She was holding his hands over her stomach,
laughing as he winced from the kicks the small person inside her gave them
both. She was running to him in the middle of the street, meeting him as he
came from work…she was pouring water into their glasses and laughing as they
clinked them together…she was holding a small baby outfit to her stomach,
pretending to try to make it fit her. She was kissing him as they lay in bed
together, her enormous stomach getting in the way of their embrace. She was
touching his face softly, tenderly stroking the spot where he had cut himself
shaving. She was laughing at him as he tried to recite a scene from Romeo and
Juliet. She was standing in his arms as music played and they spoke quietly.
She was taking the book he had been reciting from, sounding so professional as
she read Juliet's lines. She was cursing as she for the millionth time tried to
sew the tiny outfit for the baby. She was dancing with him in steerage…she was
laughing as he taught her to fly…her lips were trembling as she gauged his
feelings about the baby…she was holding him in her arms, supporting him as he
sobbed for his best friend.
"Rose…Rose…no…no, please," he
croaked out, his legs giving out again as he walked towards the door.
"No, Jack," Molly said softly,
pulling him away from the door. "She would want you to…remember her as she
was. Not her dead body. Come on, Jack, you have a baby to look after now. A
baby. Rose gave you a baby."
"I don't want it," Jack said
angrily, leaning his hand on the door. Why would he care about the baby when
Rose was gone? The baby that had cost her her life. Rose…why couldn't both
babies have died and she lived? He winced at his own thoughts, but at the same
time, he knew it was true.
"I just want her."
"It's a little boy, Jack," Ruth
whispered, walking up to him, hoping that once he saw the baby's serene face, he
would change his mind.
Oh God, dear Rose…what have I done? What
have I done? Is it too late now? Oh Jack, what have we done to you…?
Ruth's head was spinning with sorrow and
guilt and she wished she had let Jack in when he had demanded that.
Briefly, he cast a glance at the tiny baby in
Ruth's arms, drawing a heavy breath as more tears rolled down from his eyes,
but, as Ruth had hoped, that glance was enough for happy tears to mingle with
the rest and automatically, he was torn from the door to his son.
The baby…oh…he's so…so tiny, Rose. This is
what you had inside you all those months…? Rose, Rose, I will take care of
him…for the both of us. I love you…and him. How could I think that I wished he
was dead, too?
"Oh Rose…he's so perfect," he
whispered and gently, Ruth helped him to hold the baby in his own arms. The
baby opened his big blue eyes and stared at Jack in astonishment.
"I'm your daddy," Jack breathed
softly, touching the baby's head gently. "Your mommy…" Jack's voice
broke again and new tears emerged. "And your…sister, they wish they could
be here now, but they aren't. I am. I'll always be here for you. I've loved you
since…I first found out about you. From the first moment."
He leaned closer to the baby and placed a
soft kiss on his forehead, smiling when the baby just closed his eyes.
Steadying his hold around the baby's head he looked up at Molly, tears
streaming down his face.
"Rose would have…she would have been so
happy. All she wanted was to see the baby and…hold him." He turned to
Ruth, his eyes still full of tears.
"Did she see him before…I mean…I…"
Ruth's eyes were red with tears, too and she
reached out to touch Jack's shoulder. "Yes, she did, Jack. She died…before
I could get you, but…she saw the baby. She saw him."
Jack drew a shaky breath, trying to breathe
in his sobs, his heart-wrenching sobs, his tears and his regrets. Rose was
gone. She wouldn't have been if she hadn't married him. She would have been
safe, unhappy with Cal, but alive. He felt the baby moving in his arms and
remembered how he had touched her stomach, feeling the baby moving inside, and
now he knew what that little person looked like. Rose was gone, but he
would…forever take care of their baby and always, always love Rose.
*****
Cal watched Jack and Molly leaving the apartment
building, Jack holding his son in his arms, protecting him against the harsh
world.
A glass of brandy was in Cal's hand and he
took a sip every once in a while, listening to the dead silence in the
building. Twins. Who knew.
Dawson certainly looks like he could use
some cheering up. I didn't know Rose was that precious. Oh well.
He put down the glass and grinned evilly as
he watched more snow, this time softer and kinder snow fall over the city. He
glanced back into the room and nodded.
The wind increased outside, as the sun began
appearing at the horizon, barely visible to him through the houses and he
closed the curtains to bring darkness into the small room. A smile curled his
lips as he spoke the final words.
"Yes, this is a simple solution."