STARTING ANEW
Chapter Eighteen

Ruth looked at Molly and gave a sharp retort, "What could there possibly be to hear about him? He told us everything there is to know. He roams and wanders and doesn't seem to be too responsible."

"Come on, Ruth, don't you wonder where he came from, or about his family?"

"If I had a boy like that, who was shirking real life, playing at being some sort of artist, I would be happy to be rid of him."

Molly was having a hard time dealing with Ruth. One minute she was pleading for help and giving Molly a glimmer of hope that she could do something with her, the next she was back in her hoity-toity mode. "There you go again, Ruth. I thought we had you calmed down and off you go, on your high horse again. You just listen to what I have to tell you."

Molly began telling Jack's story, the simple honest story he had told her about his life in Chippewa Falls. As she went on about his parents and childhood, Molly watched Ruth to see what her response would be. But so far there was only a rather bored and impatient expression on her face. Molly went on about his interest in art, the deadly fire and his life just prior to Titanic.

Ruth eyed Molly suspiciously. It would be just like that boy to make this up to get sympathy. "So how can you believe him?" Ruth asked.

"Can I believe you, Ruth?"

"What? How dare you!" gasped Ruth. Never before in her adult life had her word been questioned. In her home, her word had been law. "How can you be sure this is all true, Molly?"

"Well sometimes you just get a feel for a person and you trust them."

"Well," said Ruth, "Right now, I am not even sure I can trust Rose. She was deceiving me about what she was doing, right up to the end on Titanic. You didn't see that drawing he did of her did you?"

"No," replied Molly, "But she told me about it."

"She told you? It was shameless, that's what it was. Would you trust someone like that?"

"It's too late now Ruth. They trust each other, that's what's important here, and what goes on between them is none of our business. They trusted their lives to one another. Isn't that enough?" Ruth had no answer, so Molly continued, "Jack and I had time to talk too. He told me about the girls he had met when he was traveling. But he never got involved, because it didn't feel right. He never had a serious relationship before Rose. With her it was right."

Molly stopped for a minute. She had never met anyone like Ruth before, never known someone who had built up such a hard shell around herself. "I think I'll just have to keep chipping away at her," thought Molly. "Ruth, it might be hard, I know, but trust me on this. I'm a pretty good judge of character. Jack Dawson is a fine person. I KNOW he is a gentle, loving and honest man," she paused before going on, "just like I KNOW there is a tender hearted woman inside of you."

Ruth looked at Molly, surprised at her last words. Right now, the last thing she felt was tender hearted. "Oh, Molly, you make this seem so believable, so easy. I find it hard to picture him doing an honest days work."

Molly just sighed. Ruth was going to take a long time to come around. "Listen honey, you need to know him. And maybe it will take time. But you have to promise me something."

Ruth was afraid to hear what Molly had in mind now. "She probably wants me to act as if nothing is wrong," thought Ruth.

"Tomorrow they are coming to say goodbye to me. You will have to see him then. Just try and be civil. That's all I ask. Don't do any more damage. Do it for Rose, do it so maybe you can be a real family someday. Think about it, Ruth, and see if you can't accept him just a little."

Ruth looked down and studied her hands. At last she spoke, "I don't totally agree with what you say, but I can see I have no choice but to go along with you." She sighed and then said, "For Rose's sake, I will do it, I will be polite."

Molly looked relieved. She looked at the clock on the table. "My word Ruth, the afternoon is gone. It's almost 6 o'clock. We've been cooped up here for hours. Let's go for a ride, and get out of here for awhile. What do you say?"

Ruth, who had rarely done anything in her life on impulse, seemed hesitant. To go out at night, unescorted? But then who would know or even care? She gave in, against her better judgment. "Alright Molly, I'll come along," she agreed.

Molly stood in the parlor with a worried look on her face. The problem of Ruth was not something she had counted on dealing with, and especially not today. She had discovered that at least Ruth was capable of some emotion. She had shown this when speaking of the attack she suffered. But then had displayed little interest while Molly had spoken about Jack. "There must be some way to break through that barrier she has built up around herself."

Molly and Ruth sat in silence in the back of the taxi. Since they had left the hotel, Ruth had been less than talkative. Molly wanted to know about Ruth's husband and how she had met him. But apparently Ruth was not about to offer any more information. "Well if I don't ask I won't know," thought Molly. "And besides, I've got nothing to lose." "Ruth, you never finished telling me about the rest of your life, after what happened in England? Do you want to tell me?" asked Molly.

"Do you really want to know?" questioned Ruth.

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise, Ruth. Go on, finish your story," said Molly. "I just feel so awkward about doing this," said Ruth.

Molly patted her hand, "You're doin' just fine, honey."

Ruth looked out the window of the taxi, not really seeing her surroundings. Instead she was seeing a far different scene. "It was winter and I was returning some books to the library." And so the story poured out starting with her family's move to Philadelphia and then of the abrupt meeting with Edwin on the library steps, catching her as she was about to fall. She had tried to shake off his hands that were holding her. Ruth had been too surprised to say anything. "He asked me my name and if I were going to any of the upcoming social events, and I shook my head that I was not. I should have been scared, but he was smiling and for some reason I was not frightened at all. He was quite bold. When I told him that I had to hurry home, he asked when he could see me next. In shock, I found myself promising to meet him for ice skating the follow week. I gasped when he had told me his name. He was from the wealthy manufacturing company." The story of their courtship evolved slowly. Edwin introduced her to his family, who gave reluctantly their support. But they kept things a secret from Ruth's parents. It was a secret until the day several of Martha's friends saw them in the park and reported what they saw to Ruth's mother. That night at dinner her parents told her she was to forget him, to never see him again. There would be a scandal if she married and he found out she was not a virgin. Ruth sobbed all night. When she did not come to their designated meeting place the next day, Edwin came looking for her. There was a confrontation with the DeWitts. But Edwin, who could charm the birds out of the trees, convinced them that he loved Ruth and that he intended to marry her. They finally relented, but told Ruth privately that if she was cast out, they would disown her. "I was worried about how to explain certain things to my husband when we became…ah, intimate, but by then I thought it would be too late to go back." Ruth and Edwin married and she took her place in the lovely home his family had provided for them. She became a member of Philadelphia society, and came to revel in that role. "Some months after the wedding, my parents left on a trip to China. They contracted yellow fever and died. I didn't even feel any remorse."

"You know Ruth, the more I listen here, seems like your parents did some of the same things to you that you did to Rose. Kept you away from someone you loved and didn't give you any support after your marriage. They made you sneak away from home to meet Edwin. Are you trying to make history repeat itself?"

"Oh Molly, this is different. Edwin Bukater was a gentleman and I was a victim of circumstance. Rose is a lady and Jack Dawson is a nothing."

"Ruth, Ruth," Molly shook her head. "I don't know if I will ever get anywhere with you."

Ruth took another deep breath. Maybe she had kept things inside too long. But that was the only way she knew. People of her class never unburdened themselves, even inside the family circle. "When Edwin and I married, he received his inheritance. That and the interest from the investments should have taken care of us forever. But things did not work out that way. He had always been interested in far away and mysterious places. He had a passion for archaeology. And people found out about this. He kept giving money to one expedition or another. He decided to go on the last one and it killed him. Several years after a trip to the Amazon, he died of malaria. When we looked into his affairs, there were thousands of dollars of debt and the creditors were already at my door. I was shamed and his family blamed me."

"How could they blame you Ruth?" asked Molly incredulously.

Ruth paled. How could she answer this? "Well Edwin was very kind, and in the beginning he worshipped me. He did everything to make me feel special. He was a very romantic person. But coming from my background, I didn't know how to respond or react. I did not understand and well, behind the bedroom door, I was a disaster. Nothing that he did or said could make me believe that any of it was proper. I had chloroform when I had Rose. I couldn't bear to see myself in such an undignified condition. When Rose was born, Edwin was thrilled and how that man let her run wild! They would go off for hours and come back covered in mud. He would fill her head with stories of ancient history and then they would go off on an expedition for the day at the museum. She was so much Edwin's child." Edwin was always polite to Ruth, but after awhile he gave up on her. "I could not be a real wife to him. I just couldn't find it in myself. And his family always blamed me for that. They said I drove him away." Rose and Ruth had never been close. But the final blow came at Edwin's death. Rose had been away at school in Switzerland. When Ruth had found out about the money, she refused to spend anymore to bring Rose home. And Rose never forgave her mother. Ruth began weeping. Molly reached out the held Ruth's hand. Between choked sobs, she continued. "Now when I look back, I can see where I have failed, failed as a wife, as a mother. But truly I didn't know any other way. I don't know how to love. My parents never really wanted me. And because of that, I don't know how to love anyone back." Ruth covered her face with her hands and her whole body shook.

"Ruth, I have one more question for you. How did you ever get involved with that Hockley?"

Ruth hesitated for a minute. "By the time Rose came back from school there were so many bills. Edwin's family had no interest in us. I met Cal and his father at a wedding. Cal was charming and he seemed enchanted with Rose. I told her that by marrying him all our troubles would be over. At first, before she really knew him, she seemed compliant and accepting of the idea. But on this trip to Europe, things began falling apart. I have to tell the truth. Rose became very defiant on the trip. And that was even before she met Jack Dawson."

Molly sat in silence for a few minutes. "Ruth, I don't think it's too late. But you have to reach out to Rose, and Jack too for that matter. You can still make it up to her. She has a big heart."

"Yes, a big heart for the wrong people," said Ruth bitingly.

"Ruth you HAVE to get over this. You just have to make up your mind. Now come on. Tell me something. When you go and visit your grandchildren someday, what kind of reason are you goin' to give them for not talking to their father?"

Ruth's head jerked up. "Grandchildren? How can you be so vulgar to even suggest that Rose and that...that man could have a family. It's disgusting."

Molly just laughed. "It's gonna happen Ruth, mark my words and I'll bet they have a big family too."

Ruth's thoughts went back to the drawing that Jack Dawson had done of Rose. My God, it was possible that Rose could already be pregnant. But what Molly said was true. There really nothing she could do about it.

Molly broke into her thoughts. "Ruth, why don't you come back to Denver with me. Stay with me for awhile. I could always use some help keeping track of my letters and bills. It would be far away from the Hockleys and everyone who knew you. It would be a fresh start and it would give you and Rose a chance to work things out. What do you say?"

Ruth was speechless. Was Molly serious? Could she swallow her pride and live off of Molly Brown's charity? "Really Molly, that is kind of you. I really don't know. I, I need to think about this a little. Do you really want me around?"

"Hey why not, Ruth. You're not as tough as you pretend to be. Maybe we'll even find a man for you?"

"What?" sputtered Ruth. "Why, what would I do with a man?"

"Well, I got a couple of good ideas," laughed Molly. She looked at Ruth, who was trying to glare at her. And then all of a sudden, Ruth blushed and she too started laughing. Molly smiled and nodded slightly to herself. "I think the ice queen is startin' to thaw." "Say Ruth, how about some dinner?"

Ruth smiled at her and said, "Yes, I suppose so."

Molly tapped the driver on the shoulder. "Want to take us somewhere near here where we can eat?"

"Over there, ma'am," said the driver. In front of them on the corner was a rounded facade with several columns. The sign over the door said "STAUCH'S." "A very nice place, dinner and even a dancehall too."

Molly paid the driver and she and Ruth got out of the taxi. Neither of them was aware of a white carriage decorated with flowers that had just turned the corner.

Chapter Nineteen
Stories