STARTING ANEW
Chapter Twenty-Eight

Jack was breathing hard and running as fast as he could. He could see that the house was engulfed with flames and that was smoke pouring out of the windows. In the distance he could hear screams and cries for help. Just as he got a few feet from the house, a huge chasm opened in front of him and he was unable to go any further.

"Mom, Dad, I'm right here," he yelled. "Just let me get across this. Then I'll help you."

He felt a blast of hot air and before his eyes, the entire building fell in on itself.

He put his hands over his face. Jack could no longer stand to watch the horror that was playing out in front of him. Suddenly his whole body was shaking.

"Jack, Jack? Are you alright? Wake up, Jack," said Rose as she gently shook him. "You're ice cold. What’s the matter?"

Jack sat up and looked at Rose. He was brought back to reality when he saw the look of concern on her face.

He buried his head in his hands and spoke, "It's the same dream I've had for five years. It's just that I haven't had it in awhile now."

She took him in her arms. "Here, Jack, let me help you for a change," she said as she stroked his head. "Tell me Jack, tell me. Maybe that will make it better."

Jack leaned against her and closed his eyes as he spoke. "It's awful. I can smell the smoke, hear their screams and I am helpless. Between their screams and what I still hear in my head from Titanic, sometimes I don't know how I can go on."

They sat there for awhile, silent, with Rose holding Jack. Finally she said, "It's seeing their graves today that's troubling you, isn't it."

"Yes, I'm sure that's it. I've never felt like this before. This all nearly destroyed me. For a long time, I felt dead inside."

She nodded her head and whispered, "In a little while, we'll be there. And maybe then you'll feel better. And you can finally make peace with yourself."

"Maybe. I hope so," he said, trying to sound optimistic.

Jack looked in the direction of the night table next to the bed and reached for his watch. He opened it.

"It's almost seven. We better get going. I still don't even know how we are going to get to the old place."

"How far is your old home, Jack?" asked Rose.

"Oh, maybe three or four miles," he answered. "It would be a long and dusty walk. I did it when I was a kid. We can probably find someone heading that way."

Rose got out of bed and starting looking in the suitcase for some clothes.

"Does anyone live there now?"

Jack sat on the edge of the bed watching her.

"I doubt it. There wasn't much left. Even the garden was ruined. Before I left, some neighbors bought off the livestock. There wouldn't be much to start with."

"Don't you own the land?" she wondered.

"That's the sad thing," said Jack. "My dad had saved enough to buy it. They were only leasing it. But he never got around to the formalities. I guess the money must have burned too. When the people at the bank gave me what was left in their account it only amounted to $80."

"Oh, what a shame," commented Rose. "You could have had something of theirs to hang on too."

Jack stood up and came over to her.

"I've got you now Rose. You mean everything to me now. I have to work through this today. I HAVE to move on. I HAVE to."

He gripped her tightly and buried his head in her shoulder, trying hard to contain his emotions.

* * * * * * * * * *

They came downstairs and were relieved to see that the hotel dining room was open. Through the doorway came the smells of biscuits and coffee. A kind looking woman was waiting on the guests. She looked up as Rose and Jack entered the room.

"Good morning, I'm Helen Williams. You must have come last night."

"Yes," said Jack, "we got here rather late. I'm Jack and this is my wife, Rose."

Jack was not yet ready to reveal his identity to anyone. He still had too much to deal with today, before he was ready to talk about himself and what had happened to him since leaving Chippewa Falls. He hoped that no one recognized him.

"Well, nice to meet you Jack, Rose," she said as she shook hands with both of them. "I hope that Ralph offered you something to eat last night. Always plenty of leftovers in the cooler."

"Ah, no," said Jack. "I just got something at Reilly's."

"Well," said Helen, "he should have offered you some food, but I know that Ralph has a few rough edges. You just come in and sit anywhere you find a place. I'll make you anything you want to eat."

When Helen came to take their order, Jack asked her a question.

"We wanted to get out in the country a bit. You don't know anyone who is heading out towards the Peterson road, south of town, do you?"

"There isn't much out that way," said Helen. "Nothing but the old Dawson place. Pretty out there though. Let me think. I'll be back in a minute. I might be able to help you."

"Jack, you turned white, when she mentioned the Dawson place. Are you sure you are really up to this," questioned Rose.

"I'll be fine Rose. I know that once this is done, I'll be fine."

Jack took he hand and looked at her across the table. Suddenly, Rose put her hand to her throat.

"Rose, what is it?" he asked.

Hurriedly she said, "Jack, I don't want to eat now. I think I'll go back upstairs for awhile."

"Do you want me to come with you? Do you want me to call a doctor?"

Rose shook her head. "Jack, please, I'll be alright. Please, I just want to go upstairs. I'll be down in a minute."

Quickly she stood up and walked across the room.

As she left the dining room, Helen brought their food. Pancakes for Jack and another plate of toast for Rose.

"Where's your wife gone to?" asked Helen.

"Oh," said Jack, absentmindedly, as he looked in the direction of the stairs, "she'll be right down, she just forgot something."

"Say, I think I found someone who can get you where you are going this morning. He's just settling up his bill. You from around here?" asked Helen.

"No," said Jack, hesitating.

"You know anyone here?"

Jack tried to look nonchalant as he answered.

"Oh, I used to. When I was in school. I just remember how nice it is out in the country here. Especially in the spring."

Helen eyed him suspiciously.

"Well, you won't find much out on the Peterson Road. Just the old Dawson farm, as I said before. Used to be kind of sad out there. Whole place burned down. Some folks killed."

"Yeah, I think I read about that when I was passing through," said Jack.

Jack wondered to himself what she meant when she said it used to be sad out there. Could it be that someone was living there and had made a go of the place?

Helen looked to the doorway and said, "Here comes the man who might be able to help you. Hey, Roger, come on over here." She called to a young man in his late twenties.

Jack saw the man approach his table. He was a little shorter than Jack and had a heavier build. He was pleasant looking and had friendly brown eyes.

"Roger, this is Jack. He wants to go out along the Peterson Road. I thought you might be going that way today."

She looked at Jack and said, "Roger here is one of my best customers. Comes through town a few times a year."

"I do survey work for the railroad," Roger explained.

"So, what can I bring you, Roger," asked Helen.

"Just a couple of fried eggs and coffee. And could you fix me up with a sandwich for lunch too."

Helen nodded and headed for the kitchen.

"So you want to go out in the country for the day?" asked Roger.

"Yes, just wanted to have a look around," said Jack.

"I have a truck here, so it won't be a problem. Can you be ready at ten?"

Jack thought of Rose upstairs and wondered how she was. He hoped she was okay and would be able to come along. He needed her.

"Yes," said Jack. "I guess ten is fine. Where shall I meet you?"

"Out in the front."

Jack nodded.

As they ate, the two men talked about the weather, Roger's railroad work and his travels. They were almost done eating, when Jack noticed that Roger was no longer paying any attention to his food or the conversation. He was looking across the room.

Roger spoke as if to himself, "That is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. What could she be doing in a place like this?"

Then he remembered that Jack was with him.

"Maybe we can get her to sit with us, since there aren't any other empty seats."

Roger saw the odd look on Jack's face as he spoke.

"Hey, Jack, she sure is something isn't she. Don't you wish you could take a woman like that in your arms and never let go?"

Jack stood up as Rose approached. He looked down at Roger and said, "I don't have to wish anything."

Roger looked puzzled.

"She's my wife!"

Roger's mouth hung open. He was truly speechless. After a few moments he recovered his embarrassment.

"I am sorry Jack. I had no idea. I thought you were alone. I hope you aren't mad. But she is beautiful."

Rose came to the table and sat down. Jack pushed her chair in.

"Who's your friend, Jack?" she asked.

Roger spoke before Jack could introduce him. He put his hand out to Rose.

"Name is Roger, ma'am. Roger Calvert of Cedar Rapids, Iowa."

Chapter Twenty-Nine
Stories