STARTING ANEW
Chapter Forty-Two
“Blue Hawk,” said Golden Moon, “I think that
there are some things that you need to share with us. The things that are
making you and Rose sad. You can’t deny it. We can see the burden you carry in
your eyes. Please, Jack, we are your family now. We need to know.”
Jack looked at Rose uncomfortably. They had
both known this was inevitable. Rose had looked so happy this afternoon and he
was reluctant to spoil that. But he owed it to these people to explain his
strange behavior. Rose had moved closer to him on the sofa and nodded her head,
indicating that he should go ahead and tell the story. They had told bits and
pieces to Vito and Rosa and to Anders and Amanda. And of course, Molly and Ruth
had gone through some of it with them. Perhaps it would be a relief to tell the
entire experience and leave out no details.
“Alright,” said Jack, steeling himself for
the experience that was to come. He took a deep breath and held Rose’s hand
tightly in his.
“Rose and I survived the sinking of the
Titanic. We stayed on the ship until the end, until the stern pulled us down
with it.”
Ted, Golden Moon and Jay sat in stunned
silence. So this was the horrible ordeal they had endured together.
“I know this is hard for you, Jack,” said
Ted, gently. “But please, tell us everything.”
Rose’s hand felt cold in his, but his hands
were just as cold. His heart was beating rapidly and in the background of his
mind were images that he would rather shut out.
“I won my ticket on the ship in a poker game.
I thought I was the luckiest guy alive, and in some ways I was,” Jack said,
looking down as Rose.
And so began the saga that led from a glance
on the deck, to near death and finally to their subsequent marriage. Jack told
the entire story, leaving out nothing, with Rose interjecting here and there,
filling them in on what had happened when they were apart. When he was
finished, Rose was pale and Jack felt exhausted.
Golden Moon got up and placed a blanket over
Rose.
“My God,” said Ted. “I had no idea. No idea
that you two had been part of that or that it was so awful. The stories we read
about here were mostly about First Class passengers that survived. That
explains why you got upset when you thought you heard Rose screaming.”
Jack could only nod.
Golden Moon and Jay were silent for a moment.
There was nothing to say. The enormity of the disaster had left them
speechless.
Then Jay spoke, “No wonder you changed. That
is quite a burden to carry around.”
“And it wasn’t over when the ship sank,” Jack
continued. “Rose was sick, near death. We struggle everyday to find happiness.
But wherever we turn we see the papers and pictures. People innocently say
things.”
“Jack, Rose,” said Golden Moon, “it is only
days since this happened. It will be better. Soon you will be occupied with
your new life. But you will never forget this and so you shouldn’t. Time will
help. You’ve got to give it time.”
“She’s right,” agreed Ted. “Everything is so
fresh in your mind now.”
“I know,” answered Jack. “We hope it gets
better too. It’s just hard to get some of those things out of your mind. Our
friends that died for one thing. People who should have had a chance to live.”
Golden Moon got up and went into the kitchen.
When she returned she brought a bowl of dried apple slices and a dish of maple
syrup.
“Come,” she said. “Let’s sweeten the evening
with some dessert.”
They gathered around the table, a more sober
group, after having heard Jack’s story.
Trying to lighten that dark mood Jay asked
hopefully, “Will you be staying around here a few more days?”
“Wish we could,” sighed Jack. “I had
forgotten how much I missed everyone here. But we have to go. I want to show
Rose Yellowstone. And I promised to take her to California, Santa Monica to be
exact. She really wants to go there,” he said looking right at her.
Rose cast her eyes upward and smiled to
herself. That is how she had gotten into all this. By innocently asking Jack to
take her and do the things he enjoyed there.
“What do you think of Chippewa Falls,” asked
Ted. “Maybe it’s not what you are used to."
“Oh, I think it’s quite nice,” said Rose.
“But it’s the people in the place that are the most important. Everyone has
been so wonderful. I want Jack to bring me back here.”
“You’re welcome anytime,” said Jay.
While they had been talking, Golden Moon had
left the room. She now returned and came to stand next to Rose’s chair.
“I have several things for you. Some gifts
from my people,” she said smiling at Rose.
She held a white feather from an eagle in her
hand.
“Today Rose, I think you have really left
your old life behind. You have accepted your new life, a life with Jack. You
have met and gotten to know many different people. And you have let that strong
spirit inside of you come to life. This white eagle feather is a symbol of that
acceptance and also of the bravery for all you have endured and overcome."
“Thank you,” said Rose. “I really do feel
that I came to life today. I will never forget it, or you either.”
Jack watched this emotional scene. He thought
about Rose and how she had changed in the last weeks. And about he himself had
changed. When he left five years ago, he never dreamed that he would marry so
soon, marry someone like Rose, and that she would be enjoying every minute of
this visit so intensely. It was truly amazing.
“And now, Rose, I want to give you a name of
the people,” said Golden Moon. “I have thought all day and have decided on the
name, “Laughs with the Water”. For today you felt joy in the water. Maybe that
name will help erase all the bad memories that you have about water. It also
reminds me of your joyous spirit."
Rose stood up and hugged Golden Moon, crying
as she spoke, “It’s very beautiful and I don’t know how to thank you. I just
don’t know what to say."
When Rose finally let go of Golden Moon,
there was one more gift to be given.
“Here Rose, this is one of my herb gathering
bags. Inside are some smaller bags with herbs in them. I have written a note
that explains what to do with them,” she said, looking knowingly at Rose.
Jack got up and moved towards Rose.
“Golden Moon, thank you for everything that
has taken place here today. You welcomed Rose, given her gifts and made this
great meal. We would not have missed this visit for anything.”
Golden Moon looked into Jack’s eyes.
“Blue Hawk, you have kept your promise. The
woman that you have brought to me as your wife, is someone that I am proud to
have as a member of our family. You have done well Jack. We are all proud of
you.”
She hugged Jack warmly.
“You go out with Stands Tall and Ted. I wish
to speak to Rose alone now.”
A few minutes later Rose came out on the
porch alone.
“I’m ready,” she said.
“Do you want us to give you a ride back?”
offered Ted.
“No, we’ll walk,” said Jack. “I think that
will be alright, won’t it Rose?”
She nodded her approval.
“It’s such a lovely night and we’ll be cooped
up on trains again. The exercise will be good,” she said.
Rose hugged Jay and his father. Jack shook
hands with Ted and embraced Jay.
“Well, I guess that’s it,” he said sadly.
They started across the yard and headed for
the road.
Both Ted and Jay shouted, “Come back again
soon.”
Jack turned and waved, “Don’t worry, we
will.”
Rose leaned her head against Jack’s shoulder
as they walked slowly back into town. She clutched the small bundle containing
her clothes and the gifts from Golden Moon close to her chest.
“What was that back there with Golden Moon,
before we left? She’s usually not so secretive,” said Jack.
“Oh, nothing Jack. I think it was a bit
emotional for her. That’s all,” answered Rose, not wanting to divulge that
useful information about birthing that Golden Moon had given her.
“You sure she didn’t say anything about me?”
asked Jack again curiously.
“Well, she did say a few things about you
Jack and I could tell by the look on her face that she had some opinions that
she was keeping to herself. But, no, she said nothing bad about you. Why?”
“She is a very special person and I owe her a
lot. I guess I worry what she must think of me. The suddenness of all this and
everything,” he went on.
“Don’t worry. I think she approves now. Even
if things did happen quickly,” said Rose smiling at him.
They walked along silently on the main street
that led back into town. The windows of most houses were darkened and only here
and there a gas street light glowed to show them the way back.
“Jack,” she said softly, “I felt I started to
really learn about myself when I met you, but today I learned even more. It was
one of the most special days, I have ever had. I will never forget it ever.”
“Well you are special to me Rose, the most
special thing that ever happened to me,” he whispered as he bent to kiss her.
“But if you think this was something, just wait until we get to Yellowstone. I
think I can even top this,” he said with a twinkling look in his eye.