STARTING ANEW
Chapter Fifty-Five
“Jack, Jack, please come.”
Rose’s agitated voice drifted down the
stairs.
Ruth and Jack looked at each other with
concern. They knew that a long and difficult day was ahead of them. “Did you
find the sheets and towels?” he asked.
“Yes, yes, it’s all ready,” said Ruth
nervously.
“Alright, you go on upstairs. I’ll take the
rest of this. Tell Rose I’m coming,” called Jack over his shoulder, as he took
an armful of supplies.
Jack stepped into their bedroom and put the
pan for bathing the baby and all the other things he carried on the dresser.
Then he squatted down next to the bed and took Rose’s hand. Ruth sat on a chair
on the other side of the bed, biting her lips.
“How are you doing?” he asked, looking into
Rose’s dilated eyes.
Just as she was about to answer him, another
contraction swept across her body. She held his hand so tightly that it was
painful even for him.
When it passed, she gasped and was able to
answer him.
“I don’t know. I think they’re getting
close,” she said in a tired voice.
“Let’s watch the clock together the next
time. Maybe it will help you think of something besides the pain,” he
suggested, trying to sound calm.
While they waited, he stroked her damp hair.
Rose turned her head to her mother and once again told her she was glad for her
presence. In much too short a time, Jack felt her grip his hand again. He
counted the minutes and seconds on the clock. Two minutes. Her labor had only
begun two hours earlier. Things were happening very quickly. Too quickly. Jack
started to breathe more rapidly and a cold sweat broke out over his body.
“Jack, the doctor is coming soon, isn’t he?”
Rose asked innocently.
She had no idea of the weather that was
raging outside.
“God, I have to tell her and get it over
with,” he thought to himself, feeling weak.
He exchanged worried looks with Ruth and then
spoke.
“There’s a terrible storm. The doctor can’t
come,” he said in an uneven voice, unable to even look Rose in the face.
Her eyes opened wide in fear.
“Jack,” she cried, “he has to. What if
something goes wrong? Jack, he has too,” she pleaded.
Jack’s heart started pounding. As Rose’s
anxiety level increased, so did the pitch of her voice. She had never been
prone to hysterical behavior, even on the Titanic, but then she’d never had a
baby before, either.
“This is going to be bad enough. I can’t let
her get out of control,” Jack realized.
He stood up and bent over the bed with his
face close to hers. He took both of her shoulders in his hands.
“You can do this, Rose. We are going to do
this together. This is OUR baby. It’s gonna be fine,” he said trying his best
to convince her that it really would be fine.
“Rose,” said Ruth, from the other side of the
bed, “Jack and I are going to take good care of you. You know he won’t let
anything happen to you. You have to help him,” she told Rose, trying to sound
confident herself.
Jack gave Ruth a grateful look. So far she
was doing her part.
“It’s gonna be fine,” he repeated as he saw
her having another contraction.
She grimaced momentarily. He kept talking in
spite of the contraction, still holding on to her shoulders.
“You have to co-operate with me. I can’t do
this without your help. Alright, Rose?” he asked her.
She nodded.
“Ruth, I think you better get that water from
downstairs now. I want to be ready.”
“Yes, alright. I’ll be right up. Do you need
anything else?” she asked him.
Jack wiped his hand across his forehead. He
was already exhausted from watching Rose’s discomfort.
“No, just hurry,” he urged, turning back to
Rose.
She gave Jack a worried glance, but she
understood what he meant.
Jack watched her leave the room. He usually
was able to control his fears. Even on Titanic, he’d been able to look somewhat
assured even though he was terrified. What lie ahead was different. Now he was
responsible not only for the life of his wife, but of a helpless infant. One
wrong move and he could destroy everything. That anxiety coupled with the
knowledge that he didn’t know what he was doing made him feel almost paralyzed
with terror.
As Rose’s labor continued, Jack kept talking
to her, trying to keep her mind off the pain.
“Listen to me Rose. Do you trust me? It’ll
help me to know that you do,” said Jack, looking for any way to build
confidence for the both of them.
“I do trust you, Jack,” she answered weakly.
“I am scared. I really am,” Rose said in a whisper.”
“Rose, that makes two of us,” Jack replied,
trying to smile and make light of the situation.
“Oh, Jack, you could never be scared…Ow.
Jack. Help me, please,” she said, struggling to speak.
“Remember in Chippewa Falls, you said that
Golden Moon had told you some things that would help. Can you remember, Rose?”
he asked, hoping that she might remember some information would help him.
Rose just twisted from side to side.
“Jack, I can’t think,” she panted between
contractions. “It hurts too much.”
“Please, Rose. Without the doctor, anything
she told you will help. Try!” he begged.
“Ugh, Jack. It hurts. Ow. Sit up. Yes, she
sat to sit up, not lie down,” grunted Rose.
Jack motioned to Ruth who had came back into
the room with the hot water. Together they slide Rose down closer to the end of
the bed and propped her back up with pillows.
“Is that any better,” he asked hopefully.
Rose ran her hands through her unruly hair.
“A little,” she sighed taking a deep breath.
“Can you think of anything else,” he wanted
to know.
“Ow, tea, raspberry tea, when it starts.”
Jack shook his head.
“No time for that now.”
“Who is Golden Moon, Jack?” wondered Ruth,
who felt she had missed out on something.
Jack felt calmed for a minute at the mention
of her name. God, if only she were here. He’d have to write and tell her about
all this.
“She’s a Chippewa midwife in my home town. A
close friend of my family. I introduced Rose to her and they took a real liking
to each other,” said Jack, hoping that Ruth would not have any comments about
this.
He watched her, but there were no remarks,
only a thoughtful look on her face.
“Ow, Jack, please, help me,” cried Rose.
He looked at her. She looked so weak, so
uncomfortable. He wished he really could do something for her.
Suddenly she pointed to the dresser.
“There are some little bags. She, she said to
breathe in the scent. That it might calm me a little,” Rose tried to explain,
sounding very tired.
He went to the dresser and removed two small
cheesecloth sacks. When he held them up to his nose, they gave off a faintly
familiar odor, like his mom’s dresser drawers at home.
“Here, try these then,” he said, hoping that
by her breathing in the scent, they might at least take the edge off her pain.
For a few minutes, it seemed that Rose had
calmed down a little. It was quiet in the bedroom now. Rose was concentrating
on holding and sniffing the lavender and rosemary scented bags. Ruth was lost
in her own thoughts of how brave Rose was. Jack sat at Rose’s side, resting his
head in his hands, his throat becoming dry.
“Soon, soon, this will be over,” he thought
to himself. “I just hope it has a happy ending.”
“Jack, I think her pains are much closer,”
said Ruth, who had been watching the clock every time Rose had a contraction.
He looked down at her and tried to brush some
hair out of her face.
Without any warning, she screamed at him.
“Don’t touch me, Jack. Just get away from me.
I can’t stand this anymore. Get this baby out of me.”
Jack stood up and backed away from the bed
for a moment. He had not expected anything like this. It had to be the pain
getting to her.
Cautiously he tried to speak to her.
“Rose,” he said softly, “stay calm. It’ll be
over soon. You need to think about staying quiet and calm.”
Again, she yelled at him. “You don’t know
what I am going through. Don’t tell me what to think about.”
Jack fought hard to control a smile. Ruth
gave him a questioning look. How like their first encounter on the ship, when
Rose had told him that he did not know her and could not tell her what to do.
No, she was still the same Rose.
Suddenly she reached out to him and gave a
loud cry.
“Jack, Oh God, Jack, I think…"