WHY
DID IT HAPPEN TO US?
Written by Stephanie
Based on some situations originated by James Cameron.
I woke up days, maybe even weeks, later. At
least, that's what the doctors told me. They told me I had come to them as pale
as the bed linen itself, with my hair matted in my face and my clothes soaking
wet. They said I had been wandering the streets and some kind stranger had
brought me here, seeing the poor condition I was in. They said it was a miracle
that I had even stayed alive. But to tell you the truth, I didn’t remember any
of that. I didn’t remember coming to this hospital or even what happened before
that.
I couldn’t remember anything. Not then, at
least. I couldn’t remember my childhood or my parents or even where I grew up.
I didn’t remember who my best friend was or how sweet my first crush had been
or even my first kiss. Oh, who was I kidding? I couldn’t even remember who I
was. I got so frustrated with myself, because I wanted to remember all those
things. I just wanted to go back to my normal life, wherever that might be.
Every day, after lunch, the nurses took me
out to the little courtyard next to the hospital. It really was a charming
little place, with beautiful flowers in full bloom for spring and little birds
chirping all around you, happy that the sun was finally starting to peek through
the winter clouds. The nurses showed me cards with different pictures on them.
They always asked me what came to mind when I saw the picture, and I always
told them I didn’t know. I really didn’t. But sometimes, on a rare occasion,
the nurse would show me a card or would be talking to me, and I'd just blurt
something out that I didn't even think I knew. That just happened to me one
day.
"Dear girl," Nurse Bennett said, in
her sweet, mothering little voice. "You know what these are." She
held up some of the picture cards. I simply nodded, tired of looking at those
ridiculous pictures every day. "Well, we're going to look at a few today
again. Shall we start?" After getting no reply from me, the nurse nodded
and held up a card. I looked at it closely. It was a picture of an older man
smoking a pipe next to the fire. I shook my head in frustration. I just didn't
see any point to doing this over and over again.
"Why do I have to look at these
ridiculous pictures? They're obviously not helping me to remember anything."
The nurse looked at me patiently, and calmly
answered. "Because you never know, young one. You never know what the
picture will say to you."
I looked at her, completely confused.
"Say to you? What do you mean by that?"
"What do you see in this picture?"
I looked at it more closely, as if I was
trying to really remember something that I could link it to. I shook my head in
frustration and threw my hands over my eyes. I suddenly became very upset.
"I don't know! All I see is an old man smoking a pipe near the fireplace.
I'm sick and tired of doing this! It's getting me nowhere! I'm sick of not
knowing who I am and where I came from. I'm sick of not being able to remember.
I just want to go back to wherever I came from before all this started!" I
could feel hot tears in the corners of my eyes, and then, surprisingly enough,
a pair of warm, gentle arms wrapping around me.
"Shh, darling. I know it's hard. And
it's going to be hard. But you're going to just have to be patient. It will
come. Okay, sweetpea? You're just going to have to--"
I suddenly stopped my hysterics and almost
pushed the poor nurse away. "Please don't call me sweetpea! I hate that
ridiculous pet name! Cal always called me sweetpea, and I detested it to the
utmost degree."
The nurse looked at me, very surprised.
"Cal? Who's Cal?"
I looked in the opposite direction, as I was
very frustrated with her at the present moment. "Cal? He was my fiancé
before…before…wait a minute! How did I know that?" I put my hand to my
forehead in astonishment, turning around to face the nurse. "Nurse, I
think I'm starting to remember!"
The nurse was happy to finally see me smile.
"You are improving much, dear! Can you tell me anything else about this
Cal? You say he was your fiancé."
I looked down at my left hand. There was an
unusually large diamond ring there that I had never even noticed before. I sat,
dumbfounded, as I held my hand in my lap. "Yes." I said it with such
uncertainty that the nurse began to look worried. "Yes, he was…I think. Oh,
gosh. I'm not so certain anymore. All I know is that…I…I don't know." My
shoulders slumped, and I hung my head as I twisted the diamond ring around my
finger.
The nurse's smile slowly faded away, and she
gently patted me on the back. "It's okay, dear. I think you've had enough
for today. Let's get you tucked back into bed."
The next couple of days were hard. All of the
nurses and doctors were in deep search for the mysterious fiancé, Cal. Even I
was unsure of who Cal was. All that I knew was that he might have been my fiancé,
and yet I could feel deep inside me an almost hatred against him. It was all
too confusing for me. I felt like I had been thrown a rope to pull me back over
to the other side, but I had lost grip on the rope and started right back where
I came from. I became very indignant with the world, and my health started to
show a change in my attitude. I started to get very sick again, and I wasn't
allowed to go outside or see anyone besides the doctor.
It was well into the month of May when the
doctor had had the last straw at guessing what was wrong with me and why I was
getting so sick. So he sent me to another doctor, who looked me over inside and
out. That was the day we all found out why I was so sick. That was the day that
I found out I was pregnant. But who was the father? Everyone was in a furor
about the whole situation. Everyone was searching frantically for the only
connection I had offered them. Cal.
It was late in the day of the twenty-eighth
of May when Nurse Bennett came to me in a flurry of movement. Behind her
trailed three or four other doctors and nurses, each with expectant expressions
on their faces.
"Dear girl! I think we may have found
your Cal!"
I looked at her, surprised and extremely
confused. "What?"
"Look at this right here." She hastily
shoved an edition of the New York Times into my lap. I scanned the page.
"What is it?"
She pointed to the article in the center of
the front page. "Read this!"
I looked the article over and read part of it
aloud. "Caledon Hockley, of Hockley Steel, and Ruth DeWitt Bukater
mourned with family members and friends today as they attended the memorial
service for Rose DeWitt Bukater, daughter of Ruth DeWitt Bukater. Caledon and
Rose had been engaged, planning to marry this month in Rose's hometown of Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania. The couple, as well as Rose's mother, had gone on a tour of
Europe in spring of this year and were sailing back on the ill-fated RMS
Titanic. After searching for over a month in the hope that Rose had survived
the sinking, Caledon announced just last week that the odds were too great and
that she was most likely lost. Rose's mother, Ruth, commented on the loss of
her daughter, saying 'We were planning on having a wedding on this day. Now,
we're having a funeral.'" I looked up at the people in my room. They
all had expectant faces. I looked back down at the paper, looking at the
picture above the article for the first time. There was a picture of what
looked to be me standing next to what I assumed to be Caledon Hockley. I looked
at the picture extremely closely, until I could make out the ring on her
finger--it was just like the one I had on...obnoxiously huge. Under the
picture, it read, Rose DeWitt Bukater--born June 21, 1894, died April 15,
1912. I shook my head in disbelief and yet delight. I had finally found out
where I came from. "I can't believe this. Do you suppose…"
The nurses looked at me and nodded excitedly.
Nurse Bennett came up to me and patted me on the back. "Well, Rose DeWitt
Bukater, we finally know the final chapter to your story. And don't you worry
about a thing, dear. I've just wired this Caledon Hockley, and he should be
here soon…very soon!" I smiled and lay back in bed, but for some reason my
smile faded. The words he should be here soon…very soon echoed in my
head, and for some odd reason I felt almost afraid, nervous.
It was the first of June when they came and
when it all started. Nurse Bennett was the first, of course, to come rushing
into the room with the news.
"Rose! Rose! They're here!" I
turned around to face her, as I had been staring out the window next to my bed.
"What?" I asked, somewhat confused.
Nurse Bennett looked impatient with me.
"They're here!"
"Who?"
She threw her arms up in the air. "Who?
Why, your fiancé and your mother!"
I was about to speak, but Nurse Bennett left
the room. I could vaguely hear a conversation between two or three people. I
knew one of the voices was the doctor, but the other two voices sounded vaguely
familiar. They were in hushed tones outside my door, but I could still hear
them.
"You remember what I told you about
Rose's condition, don't you, Mr. Hockley?" I could hear the doctor ask.
"She's lost all memory of what happened before the day she woke up in this
hospital on May eighth. She's slowly regaining her memory. Actually, the first
thing she remembered was you. One of our nurses had been talking to her and
made the mistake of calling her sweetpea. From what I understand, Rose snapped
back at the nurse and started rattling off right out of the blue about how she
hated when you called her that. But she doesn't know you…both of you. You're
total strangers to her. If she were to walk past you on the street, she would
never make the connection as to who you are. You'll probably find that she'll
act a little strange around you these first couple of days. It just takes time
to adjust. So, this part of the problem is left up to you. You'll have to help
her with her memory during the next couple of weeks, and I assure you that within
a couple of months or so, it will all just click and she'll remember
everything, just like that."
"Well, that's…great. Yes, that's very
good news...you know, for her to get her memory back," I could hear the
familiar male voice almost chuckle.
"Oh," the doctor said in an even
more hushed voice. "There's something that I still have yet to tell you
that is of the utmost importance. You see…well, I may as well just say it. Rose
is pregnant. She's a little over a month along. Since we found out, we've all
been frantically searching for you. We're assuming that you're the
father."
I could hear a nervous laugh escape the man's
lips as he stuttered on his next sentence. "Well…I…ugh…I don't know what
to say. Such a surprise." His last few words came out as almost a shriek.
The doctor chuckled, and I could hear him
slap him on the back. "They always are, aren't they? She's in her room if
you'd like to see her. You can check her out of the hospital at any time to
take her home. She's fully recovered in that nature."
The man sounded almost queasy to me.
"Yes, thank you. I'd like to bring her home right now, actually."
"Very well. Just sign this release form.
Thank you, Mr. Hockley. It's been quite an experience, taking care of your
fiancée this past month and a half."
"Oh, I'm sure."
"Take care, Mr. Hockley, Mrs. DeWitt
Bukater."
I had my back turned towards the door, but I
could feel two sets of eyes staring at me. I didn't know what to do.
"Rose?" I heard a woman's voice
this time. I turned around to face my visitors. What I saw before me was an
older woman, perhaps in her mid to late forties, and a younger man who looked
like he was about thirty. "Rose, is that really you?" The woman said
it again.
I looked them over, making eye contact with
both of them and trying to smile. "I don't know…is it?"
"Oh God, Rose! My poor, sweet
Rose!" the woman cried as she practically ran up to me. She reached out
for a hug, but I found myself backing away. I noticed a hurt look reflected in
her eyes as she slowly brought her hands back down to her side.
"Who are you?" Now I saw an angered
pain rip throughout her body. She slowly backed away from me and sat down on
the bed.
"My own daughter doesn't even know who I
am." The woman who I assumed was my mother started crying into her hands.
"Ruth, the doctor told us this would
probably happen. You just have to have patience." He turned towards me and
stepped forward. "Rose, this is your mother, Ruth DeWitt Bukater. My name
is Caledon Hockley, Cal for short. I'm your fiancé. We're going to take you
home now, Rose, back to Philadelphia where you live with your mother. Your
mother has asked me to stay with you until…well, until we can straighten things
out. Is that okay with you?" Cal asked calmly.
I looked them over and nodded slowly. Cal
smiled and put his arm around me, making me a little nervous, as we walked out
of the little hospital that had been home to me for over a month. As we walked
down the hallway, I noticed Nurse Bennett and some of the others who had taken
care of me. I gave each one of them a hug, said my good-byes, and I never saw
them again.
We rode home in a first class,
top-of-the-line railcar. It was quite a shock to find out just how wealthy Cal
was. I had never known that I had come from such a well-to-do family. All the
way back to Philadelphia, Cal and Mother showed me what seemed like hundreds of
family photos and places that I had supposedly been to. I didn't really
remember the photos, with the exception of one or two sticking out in my mind.
It seemed like everyone was always asking me if I remembered this or remembered
that. But for the most part, I didn't.
For the first two months of being back home,
it was pure hell. I felt like I was walking on eggshells around everyone. I had
adapted to what I was told my life had been like before. Some of it made sense,
but for the most part, it was like living a whole new life. I had to relearn
everything. But I think I started to remember more of my past each day.
It wasn't until the night of August thirtieth
that I started to doubt the people who had taken care of me for the past three
months.
June 7, 1912
New York
Jack Dawson slowly bent down to pick up his
suitcase, which held nearly everything he owned. He had survived the sinking,
and after frantically searching for Rose on the Carpathia, he had found out
that she had perished along with the other fifteen hundred poor souls lost. His
heart broken and his dreams shattered, he felt like he had no reason to live
any longer. He knew that Rose was his soulmate, and now she was gone…forever.
He had moved into an apartment in New York
after living on the streets for about a month with no money and little food.
Now, he was moving. He had decided that New York held too many bad memories for
him and that he ought to go home, back to Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin. So that
was what he was doing now, packing up his few precious things and heading out
for the horizon once more.
He looked down at some of the dishes he had
sitting on the kitchen counter and sighed to himself. Maybe I ought to just
wrap those up in some newspaper so they won't break, he thought. I'll go
ask Mrs. Evans.
Jack walked out into the hallway and knocked
on his neighbor's door. It creaked open to reveal a little old lady who was
probably the sweetest thing on earth. "Hello, Jack! I heard you're moving
out today. Such a shame to lose such a gentleman such as yourself."
Jack smiled at her compliment. "Ah, you
flatter me, Mrs. Evans. Actually, I was wondering if you had any newspapers
that I could use to wrap up my dishes so they won't break."
"Of course, dear. Of course! Hold on
just a minute." She turned, and Jack could hear her scrambling through
some papers. "Here you are, my boy." Jack smiled at her and thanked
her. "Any time, Jack. You take care of yourself."
Jack walked into his apartment and started
wrapping his few dishes in the newspaper. He was so engrossed in thinking about
finally going back home that he didn't even see the headline on the paper he
was wrapping a glass with. It read: Rose DeWitt Bukater Found Alive!
August 30, 1912
Philadelphia
I remember waking up in the middle of the
night, my stomach a little hungry from not eating dinner. I was just about five
months into my pregnancy, my stomach much bigger than before. I slipped on my
slippers and my robe and decided that I would just go down to the kitchen to
scrounge up something to eat.
I walked down the hallway, sighing to myself
at the miserable August heat hanging in the air. It was unbearably humid still,
and it was beginning to get on my nerves. I was just about to go down the
staircase when I saw a streak of light coming from under a doorway in the hall.
I started to walk past it, assuming that Mother or Cal hadn't been able to
sleep, but I heard two voices coming from inside. Not even realizing what I was
doing, I crept over to the door and laid my ear against it. I could hear them
crystal clear. It was Mother and Cal discussing something.
"Ruth, this is getting out of hand. We
can't just keep lying to her. She's going to find out sooner or later. The
doctor said so himself."
"But, Mr. Hockley, do you want her to go
back to the way she was? Remember that, Mr. Hockley? Remember that wild and
free spirit she used to have before? Well, she doesn't now, and that's all
because of the way we've shown her what her life is like and what is expected
of her. She'll turn out different this time. She's like a little child. All you
have to do is tell her something and she'll believe you. She doesn't know any
better."
"And that's what we've been doing for
the past three months, and that's what we'll continue to do. The only problem
is the wedding has been rescheduled for October first."
"What's wrong with that?"
"I'm extremely nervous."
"Oh, Caledon! That's only normal."
"No, it's not just pre-wedding jitters.
It's about the baby."
"What about the baby?" I could then
hear a silence that lasted for nearly a minute, and that worried me. I was more
than curious to hear what they were going to say. Finally, Cal spoke.
"Because, Ruth, Rose is due in the
middle of January, and when she has that baby, it won't look at all like
me!"
"W-what are you talking about?"
"That's not my baby. The old Rose never
let me even get near her. There's only one other man who can be responsible
for…it."
"I can't believe this. Who's the father,
then?"
"Think about it, Ruth…real long and
hard." His voice was starting to rise. "Who was she with five months
ago around the middle of the month?" I could then hear Mother gasp
slightly.
"Oh, my God."
"Yes…we both know who the father is. It
was that damned gutter rat, and you know it! I'll bet you anything that when
this baby is born it will have blonde hair and blue eyes!"
I couldn't take anymore. I ran all the way to
my room, trying not to burst into tears. When I got there, I quickly and
quietly shut my door, ran to my bed, and buried my face in my pillow, letting
my hot tears flow freely. Anything I had been told could possibly be a lie. I
could no longer trust these people.
August 30, 1912
Eau Claire, Wisconsin
Jack went into the kitchen of his modest
apartment. He was especially depressed these days. Everything seemed to be
going wrong in his life. He felt like a wreck, and that was exactly what his
apartment looked like. Clothes were hanging over the sides of chairs and
cabinets were left open, their contents strewn across the countertops. Vain
attempts at artwork were left crumpled on the floor, as well as newspapers and
other trash. Jack stepped on top of one of the newspapers and felt the paper
stick to the sole of his shoe. He looked down to see that he had previously
stepped in something sticky.
"Damn it." He sighed and pulled the
paper off of his shoe. He was about to throw it away when something caught his
eye. He read the headline reading: Rose DeWitt Bukater Found Alive! "Jesus."
His voice was barely audible. He looked up at the date. He read it aloud.
"June 7, 1912. That was the day I left New York. This must be the paper
Mrs. Evans had given me." He scanned the article. He suddenly jumped and
started throwing everything he could into his bag. "She's in Philadelphia.
I've gotta get her!"
And with that and a little note on the door
to his landlord, Jack left Wisconsin for the second time.
August 31, 1912
Philadelphia
The next day was probably the worst day of my
life. I had to face the two people who I now hated the most.
The battle all started after breakfast, when
Mother left to call on her friend Margaret Wilmington. It left just Cal and I
all alone in the house, with the exception of a couple of servants who were not
busy running errands.
I was trying to distract myself by reading a
book from the library that I had discovered in the house. It was actually a
rather interesting book by a man named Freud. I was so engrossed in the reading
that I didn't even realize the book had been torn out of my hands until I heard
it hit the wall with a thump. I looked up suddenly, only to find Cal's menacing
figure towering over me.
"I wish to see you in the study
immediately." I swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat, quickly
got up from the chair I had been sitting in, and followed Cal into the study.
He closed the door with a thud, and that's when I knew that I was in for it. He
walked behind his desk and glared at me.
"Sit down!" I did so like a trained
little puppy, and watched as Cal sat, too, casually leaned back into the chair,
and put his hand over his eyes. He waited a moment before speaking, trying to
gather his thoughts. He finally spoke, and I was surprised to hear that his
voice was calm. "Forgive me, Rose. I was up very late last night talking
things over with your mother, and I'm afraid I'm a little moody today. It
wasn't one of my best nights for sleep."
"I can imagine."
His head flew up towards me, his eyes
piercing into me. "What was that?"
I couldn't believe that had just slipped out
of my mouth! I tried laughing it off coolly, but it came out as an obviously
vain attempt. "Oh, nothing. I was just saying that I can imagine what
those kind of nights are like. You probably just have too much on your
mind," I lied to him, and watched his face relax and fall into place. I
noticed his mouth curve into a small smile as he continued on.
"Anyway, sweetpea, we're about to be
married in about one month, as you know, and--" I think he could tell that
I was in my own little world, not even paying attention to him. "Sweetpea?
You seem to be deep in thought about something. Is there something you'd like
to tell me?"
That's when it seemed like the light bulb
turned on over my head. I don't know why or how, but I felt somewhat different,
not quite as lost. "Oh, I was just thinking about the baby, that's all.
What do you think we should name it when it comes?"
"Why all of a sudden?"
"I think that we should discuss these
things. I want to name the baby after his father if he's a boy. I think Jack
would suit him very well, don't you?" I watched as Cal turned pale.
"J-Jack? Don't be ridiculous. We both
know that I'm the baby's father."
"You're the father? Oh, Cal, stop
fooling yourself! We both know that Jack Dawson is the father. There is no way
that you could be the father of this baby, because this baby was conceived on
the night of April fourteenth on the RMS Titanic. So, no, on the contrary, Cal,
is there something you'd like to tell me, or shall I tell you what you told my
mother last night?" Cal stood up suddenly, and came around to the chair I
was sitting in.
"Wait! You little sneak! You were
listening in on us? You--" He stopped suddenly, his angry features almost
relaxing. He turned his head away from me slightly. When he spoke, it was in a
whisper. "How did you know about that?"
"Know about what?"
"About Titanic, and Jack, and…and…"
I thought about what he had just said, and then it hit me. All those things
happened before I was in the hospital, which meant only one thing--my memory
was coming back! I was suddenly extremely happy. "I can remember!" I
looked around the room. "I remember this room. This used to be my father's
study. I remember how he used to sit over here in his leather chair and smoke
his pipe next to the fire every night at exactly seven o‘clock. I can
remember--"
Cal interrupted me before I could go any
further. His voice was strong and stern. "Yes, Rose, you can remember. But
can you remember the fact that this baby's father is dead? Can you remember
that, Rose? What are you going to do, Rose--run away? Now that you have your
memory back and you obviously know what's been said, what are you going to do?
Just leave and throw all of this baby's hopes of survival down the drain?"
"No, Cal. By staying with you I would
throw all of this baby's hopes of survival down the drain. You're not his
father, and I'll be damned if you will ever be. Good-bye, Cal." There--I
had said it. I walked out of the room, and once in the hallway, ran all the way
to my room to gather my few belongings and some money. After hastily throwing
my things into my suitcase, I reached under the rug and pulled out one of the
wooden floorboards from my floor. Still there and covered in dust was the
little box that my father had given me before he died. It was supposed to be
money for my eighteenth birthday, but since he knew that he would not live to
see me use it, he had put in a hefty sum. There must have been at least ten
thousand dollars stashed away in here. I quickly put it in my pocket, replaced
the board, and covered it up with the rug.
I needed to get out of here fast. Heck, I
needed to get out of this state. I just wanted to be as far away from these
people as humanly possible, and that's when it hit me.
I ran as fast as I could back down the
stairs, this time taking the servant's stairway to avoid a confrontation with
Cal, and I ran. All the way to the Philadelphia train station.
August 31, 1912
Philadelphia Train Station
Jack looked around the train station. So
this is Philadelphia. This is where Rose is, he thought to himself. Jack
looked around and suddenly remembered that he didn't know exactly where Rose
lived. I'll just go ask the ticket booth if they have a residential listing.
Jack stepped right into the line and fiddled
with his bag while he waited. What will it be like to see Rose again? he
thought. God, it seemed like he was seeing her everywhere. Even the woman in
front of him had hair exactly like Rose's. God, I've missed her. But I'll
see her soon…soon.
He watched impatiently as the line slowly
moved up. His head perked up at the sound of his name, and he looked
around…there was nobody there. Then he heard it again, and this time he leaned
in closer to the girl in front of him. He could just barely make out what she
was saying. She was whispering something about going to California and…and a
man named Jack. Curious, he kept listening, his eyes growing wider with every
word.
August 31, 1912
Philadelphia Train Station
I looked around the crowded station, keeping
a close eye out for Cal or whoever might be looking for me. I had stepped into
the line to the ticket booth to purchase a ticket for the next train to leave
for Santa Monica, California.
"Well, Jack, I'm finally going to Santa
Monica. Go see the roller coaster and drink cheap beer and…and ride a horse
right in the surf…just like a man. Oh, God, Jack! Why'd you have to leave me?
Why? We should be able to do all this together, just like we said we
would." I looked down at my round belly and rubbed it gently. It was now
my only connection to him. "You'll never even be able to see your own son
or daughter. You would have been a wonderful father, Jack, just if…if…" I
suddenly stopped. I hadn't realized it, but I had been thinking out loud. I
felt my face flush with color as I looked at the couple standing in front of
me. They didn't seem to have noticed, as they were too busy paying for their
tickets. I wanted to turn around, but I felt the courage slip away from me, and
I decided against it.
Finally, it was my turn. I stepped up to the
window and leaned on the counter. "Hello. When's the next train to Santa
Monica, California?" I watched as the man behind the counter looked
through his many timetables strewn across his desk.
"Let's see now. It leaves in thirty
minutes and will arrive in Los Angeles, California, sometime tomorrow evening.
Tickets are nineteen dollars each."
I put down a twenty dollar bill on the
counter. "Fine. I'll take a one-way ticket, please." The man nodded and
was just about to take my money when the man standing behind me came up to the
window and nudged me aside.
"Wait," the stranger said as he
threw down another twenty dollar bill. "Make that two." I was just
about to tell him how rude he was and how he had no right to do such a thing
when I finally looked up at him. My mouth fell open and I suddenly felt faint.
I could feel my heart beating a million miles an hour as I stared into the all
too familiar ocean blue eyes that I had fallen in love with just five months
ago.
I could barely stand, let alone speak, and
when I did, it came out as merely a whisper. "Jack? Is that really
you?" I could see the tears in his eyes as he looked down at me with
nothing but love pouring out of his soul.
He simply nodded his head and pulled me close
to him. I could feel the soft cotton of his shirt on my cheek and the warmth of
his breath tickling my ear as my tears flowed freely down my face. "Yes,
it's me, Rose, now and forever."
The End.