THE FIRE WITHIN
Chapter One

The blue sky was clearer than most days, and the water splashed against the ship’s hull. It was the fifth ship that had pulled into the harbor that day. A tear fell into the water. Christa wiped her eyes. She had left everything she had ever known. Her best friend, her home, and all her memories had been left behind. Kerry, Ireland had been her home since she was a baby. She had not known anywhere else until her mother died.

On her mother’s deathbed, she had told her a secret. She was twelve then, and she remembered every detail. Her mother’s face had been as pale as a ghost, and her hair had been dull, too. She had listened closely as her mother had disclosed the story of their family.

"Christa, you are not alone. You have an uncle in New York. His name is William Cutting. Find him. Your father and I moved from New York when we conceived you. I never went back, but you must. You must tell him that I loved him, no matter what happened between us."

"Okay, Momma. I will." Christa had cried. She knew nothing of her mother’s brother, but she had vowed to fulfill her mother’s promise.

Christa had used the money she had to pay for the funeral. When everything had been taken care of, she had no money left to go anywhere. The Ryan family had let her stay with them until she finished school. They had been so nice to take her in, and because of Tommy, they had accepted her.

Christa and Tommy had been friends since they were children. They got along like brother and sister, and they supported each other, too. Christa knew she was suppose to go to New York and live with her uncle, but how could she? She had no money left. When she got old enough, she started to work. She worked in a pub, against Mrs. Ryan’s wishes, and started to collect money for her trip. Within a few months, she had collected all that she needed, told Tommy she would see him again soon, and thanked Mrs. Ryan for her hospitality.

Christa thought about Tommy. She loved him so. They had never been together romantically, but they were inseparable. She turned away from the shore and went on her way.

She hadn’t expected to see America the way it was. Old New York looked more dismal than anything she had ever seen. The city looked poor, and so did the inhabitants. They threw rocks at them, but she dodged them and headed on her way. She looked for a place to stay, anywhere she could find.

The Old Five Points Mission Brewery called out to her. She went inside. There was some kind of raid, but she got past it and followed the stairs below. Everything seemed much quieter down there. She wandered into the various rooms. When she found one that wasn’t occupied, she sat down and closed her eyes.

In the far-off distance, she heard a noise. She awoke quickly. She held her bag, and although she carried nothing, she held it like she did.

"What do you want?" She felt like a scared little rabbit.

"Nothing, Missy. I just want your bag. Then I be on me way," Johnny said.

"Please, I have nothing. I have nothing of value. Honestly." She got a hold of something in her pocket and pretended it was a gun.

"Honestly?" Amsterdam asked.

"Yes. I just came here from Ireland." She wondered which man would attack her first, but she answered their questions so she wouldn’t be rude.

"Ireland, yeah? Which part?" Johnny asked.

"Does it matter?" Christa was still on guard.

"No, not really. Tell me, are you really Irish?" Johnny was curious about the woman in their place.

"No. Why?" she asked.

"Then what are you?" Amsterdam had never met such a beauty, except Jenny.

"American. Look, would you mind telling me who you are, if you don’t mind?" She thought they were gentlemen, but she didn’t trust them.

"I’m Johnny." He held out his hand.

"Well, hello, Johnny." She shook it. "And you, sir, or don’t you speak?" She had never met a man like him--young and ruggedly handsome.

"Amsterdam," he said quickly.

"Well, if you two would lead me somewhere nicer, I would appreciate it," she said, knowing she didn’t know them, but somehow trusting them anyway.

"I’m afraid there isn’t much here, but we can lead you somewhere much better than this," Johnny said.

"Don’t tell me it’s a brothel, ‘cause I ain’t into that." She was serious. She wasn’t.

"Nah, not at all. Our friend, Jenny, may be able to help ya." Beautiful women always embarrassed Johnny, but he was able to talk to Christa, the stranger from Ireland.

"Jenny?" Christa repeated.

"Yeah. Jenny Everdeane. What’s ye name?" he asked.

"Christa Connor." She stood unsteadily. She had trouble walking in the dress she wore; it had been her mother’s.

"So, Miss Christa, ever been to New York before?" Amsterdam asked.

"No. I only arrived today. I left Ireland because this place was my mother’s native country. So, what’s new in Paradise Square?" Christa knew a little bit about her mother’s heritage. She had read books about New York.

"Nothing but the gangs, which reminds me. You must pay homage to Bill," Johnny interrupted. He knew everyone had to pay. Nobody got off free from paying the Butcher.

"Bill?" Christa wondered who this individual was.

"Yes. Bill Cutting." Johnny led the way, falling short of Amsterdam, who was in the lead.

She knew nothing about the gangs. She had never heard anything about them. But she knew about Bill and who he was.

"Miss, do you know of the gangs of New York?" Johnny wiped his sweaty hands on his pants.

"Can’t say I do, Johnny." Christa leaned close to him.

"Well, in short, everybody owes, everybody pays," he told her, in short.

"I see. I plan to pay anyway I possibly can to stay out of this blazon hell." She referred to poverty.

They entered Satin’s Circus, a loud, lively joint. There was singing, dancing, drinking, sexual activities, and betting. Not a place Christa was used to. Not at all. She used to work in a pub in Ireland, but it was much quieter. Everyone picked on her, asking for a dance. She had to tell them she was not interested in men, and then they began to leave her alone. Christa was pure. She hadn’t been involved in any crimes. She had always worked for what she needed, and never on her back, like so many had done. Her virginity was the most sacred thing to her. She wanted to give it to the right man, the one worthy of her heart.

Johnny went close to a table with men playing poker.

"I have found someone new for you to meet. I think she can be very useful." Johnny passed McGloin, pushing his way through.

"She?" Bill looked up.

Christa dared not look the man in the eye. He scared her.

"Come closer, Miss," Bill said to her.

She went closer, eyeing everything but him.

"Can she not look me in the eye?" he asked.

"No one can, Bill, especially when you’re playing cards," Johnny told him.

"What’s your name, Miss?" Bill asked.

"Christa Connor, sir." She curtsied. She looked at the man who was her uncle. She wondered why he was so important here.

"Well, take her to Jenny. She’ll teach her everything she needs to know." Bill waved his hand.

"Okay." Johnny followed Bill’s instructions.

Jenny was in the brothel. Christa hoped she wouldn’t be working there. She prayed she never would.

When they found Jenny, she was in her room, counting her bludgeting. She held a gun their way and quickly put away her things.

"Geez, Johnny! You should knock," said the fiery redhead.

"Jenny, I have a new friend. Bill told me for you to teach her, show her the way," Johnny said nervously.

"Okay. Who is this friend?" Jenny asked.

"Me. I am Christa. Christa Connor." She stepped up to introduce herself.

"Nice to meet you, Christa. I’m Jenny. Jenny Everdeane." Jenny stood up and shook her hand. "Well, gentlemen, you can leave now. I will show Miss Christa around," Jenny told them.

They closed the door and left.

"Mind if I sit here, Jenny? Leave my things?" Christa asked.

"You might wanna take your stuff," Jenny said, not trusting the girl.

"They’re just clothes in there, nothing of value," she told her.

"In that case, put it here. No one will touch it." Jenny opened a wall panel and put the bag into it.

"Excuse me. I forgot to give the gentlemen something for their trouble." Christa ran out the door.

She quickly followed the men and tapped them on their shoulders.

"Excuse me. I forgot my manners." She gave them each two gold coins.

They were astonished.

"Miss, where did you get these?" Johnny asked.

"I worked for a living," she told them.

"Got anymore?" Johnny asked.

"A few. Why?" Christa was amazed that they had never seen money before.

"Bill would be very interested in these," Johnny said, eyeing the gold in his hands.

"I am sure he would be, but I only got a few. Actually, those are the only ones." Christa had saved them for so long after her parents had died that she figured she should get rid of them.

"Thank you, Miss," Amsterdam said, put the coins in his pocket, smiled, and winked at her.

She stared at him, this mysterious stranger. She was attracted to him.

Jenny caught up with Christa.

"Sorry, Jenny, but I owed them for bringing me here," Christa explained herself.

"Sure. First things first. Come. Follow me," Jenny said, taking Christa under her wing.

She followed her into an alleyway and ripped her long dress.

"Hey! That was my mother’s dress!" Christa yelled.

"Sorry, but you need to walk faster. You can fall in this."

"True enough." Christa knew she was right.

"Have you ever done any bludgeting?" Jenny asked.

"Bludgeting?" Christa didn’t know the word.

"Yeah. Steal anything?" Jenny looked at her. She was nothing more than another pretty face in the Points.

"No." Christa looked at her strangely.

"Well, you’re about to learn. It’s the only way to survive here--either that, or the brothel." Jenny explained to her about life in the Points.

"No. Not the brothel," Christa said.

"All right, then. I see we see eye to eye. Watch me very closely." Jenny attempted to be a good teacher and show her the way.

They walked together, and Jenny bumped into a man, stealing his gold pocket watch.

Christa didn’t notice that until the man went on his way and she showed her.

"Wow. You’re amazing, Jenny. Think I can do that, too?" Christa asked.

"Sure. Try if you can. The trick is to distract them with your beauty." Jenny waved for her to go and try.

"All right. Let’s see." Christa walked into someone and attempted to steal something.

The man looked at her right away. She batted her eyes.

"I am so sorry, sir. Pardon me," she said, stealing his wallet. He didn’t notice.

When he went on his way, she was happy. She could do it without them noticing.

"Very good, Christa. Now, I will leave you, and you can go on your way. Bring back all your bludgeting to me," Jenny said.

"All right." Christa didn’t really like it, but she wanted to be free and not work in the brothel. There was no way she would work with sex. She would rather starve first.

The rest of the day, Christa went bludgeting. She played on her beauty every step of the way. Toward the night, she went back to the brothel and knocked on the door.

"Come in," Jenny said. "Well, hello, Christa. How was your first day?" she asked.

"Good, I think." Christa had no idea what was good or bad.

"Did you get anything?" Jenny waited for her to show her what she had gotten.

"Quite a lot, actually, but I kept getting offers from gentlemen, if you know what I mean." Christa gave her an uneasy look.

"Well, how did you fend them off?" Jenny wondered.

"I always told them I wasn’t interested in men in Ireland, so why break tradition?" Christa shrugged her shoulders.

"Fair enough. Let’s see." Jenny was anxious to see what her new friend had brought for her.

Christa took the bludgeting out of her pocket. There were five gold watches, a few bills, wallets, coins, and something else. A gold necklace.

"Here. You keep this." Jenny gave her the necklace back.

"Thanks." She looked at that as a present.

"Now, I will take our bludgeting to Bill and we will be free." Jenny wrapped everything in a hanky and put it in her pocket.

"All right." Christa followed her.

Bill was downstairs, being caressed by women.

Jenny pulled them off and gave the offering to Bill.

"You’ve done well today." He took the offering.

"Thanks, Bill. Christa got most of it today. She’s good," Jenny told him.

"I am very pleased, indeed." Bill relaxed, putting the stuff into his pocket. "Christa?" he called.

"Yes?" She came in front of Jenny. All around her, men and women were doing the deed.

"As per my gift for bringing in such a nice pawn on your first try, I will grant you anything you want," he said, taking a liking to her.

"Anything?" she asked.

"Yes." He bowed his head.

Christa thought about it and looked over at Amsterdam. Then she thought about it again.

"I would like my own room," she answered.

"Consider it done. Johnny, her room, please." Bill called Johnny.

"Yes, Bill." He had just lost his room.

"Jenny? Can I go get my stuff?" Christa asked her.

"I will bring it to you." She left and went back to the room to get Christa’s bag.

"Thanks," Christa said.

Christa followed Johnny. She walked into the room. It was nice and quiet, but there was stuff already in there.

"Johnny, was this someone else’s room?" Christa looked at the place. It wasn't very clean.

"Yeah. Amsterdam’s and mine. We shared this together. Mind, we aren’t he-shes." He laughed.

"I never thought ye were. Is Amsterdam with anyone?" she asked out of curiosity.

"Nah, but he likes Jenny. I know he does. If you mind, I will get my stuff," he told her, and proceeded to get a sack to put his stuff into.

"You can leave it, Johnny. I didn’t mean to get you kicked out." Christa stopped him.

"It’s all right," he said.

"No, it’s not. You leave it all here. We will share a room." Christa had only shared a room with one man in her life, Tommy Ryan.

"You sure?" he asked as she phased out of memory lane.

"Yes. I am sure you and Amsterdam can stay here, too. We’ll just be roomies." She sat down, rubbing her feet.

"Okay. I will be back later. Good night." He left his stuff and went back outside.

"Night, Johnny," she said as he closed the door.

Christa undressed, getting ready for bed. She was in her undergarments when Amsterdam went inside.

"Oh, excuse me." He turned around.

"It’s okay. Come on in." Christa didn't mind being nude in front of him. She had been nude in front of Tommy many times before. She wasn't embarrassed at being nude in front of men at all.

Amsterdam stared at her and saw her creamy silk skin disappearing down into her cleavage. Her brown hair brushed her shoulders. He started to feel his temperature rise.

She got into bed, looking at him.

"Do you wanna share?" She scooted over.

"Share a bed? People might think we were sleeping together," he told her.

"I don’t mind, really. I used to sleep with a male friend--not sexually, if you must know." She scooted over.

"I think Johnny will get jealous," he said.

"Don’t worry. I think this bed is big enough for us all. I trust you to be a gentleman." She wrapped the blanket around herself.

"You trust so much when you shouldn’t." He sat down, taking off his shoes.

"I know. My friend, Tommy, told me that, too," she told him, watching his shaggy dark blond hair.

"Tommy. Old beau?" he asked, and took off his vest-like jacket.

"No. Just a friend. I never had a beau." She lay there, staring at the ceiling.

"You’re joking. A pretty thing like you?" He thought she was joking.

"You really think I am? Pretty, I mean?" She blushed.

"Yeah." He winked at her again.

"Thank you," she said, smiling at him.

"So, who’s this Tommy?" He changed the subject.

"He’s my best friend. After my folks died, I lived with him and his family." She glanced away.

"So, why’d you leave?" he asked, wondering why this girl had left when she shouldn't have.

"I wanted to see my mother’s hometown. She used to live here, in New York." She didn't really know which part, though. "What about your folks?" she asked him.

"My mother died young, during childbirth, I’m guessing, or so I was told by my father, and the Butcher killed my father," he explained as he lay next to her.

"Bill?" She looked at him, feeling uneasy.

"Yes," he answered, feeling he could trust her.

"Oh, my goodness, Amsterdam. Don’t you want revenge?" She looked at him with curiosity.

"Yes. All in good time," he told her, and turned toward her.

She lay there, closing her eyes. Amsterdam stared. She could feel his eyes on her.

"Is there something wrong?" she asked.

"Nope," he said.

She looked at him and kissed him.

He kissed her back. She pulled back and remembered something.

"Aren’t you with Jenny?" She looked into his eyes.

"No. Never have been. Why?" He wondered why she would ask.

"Johnny told me you liked her," she told him.

"I did, until I met you." He was about to kiss her again.

"You like me?" she asked, unable to figure him out.

"Yes." He kissed her again.

She kissed him back again, touching his chest and feeling all the scars.

"What happened?" She had never seen a man's chest with so many scars before.

"Nothing. Got into a few fights, is all." He touched her face.

She kissed his chest, kissing every scar. She could hear his breathing increasing.

He looked at her and took her mouth savagely.

She pulled back several times. She was very nervous, and afraid she was doing something wrong.

He hovered above her and removed her undergarments. She looked into his eyes, and in them she saw trust.

Her face changed when he entered her. His length pushed through her and she cried out in pain.

"Christa? Is everything okay?" he asked, never having experienced this before.

"No. It hurts," she said, feeling discomfort.

"Sorry. I didn’t know." He had thought she had done this before.

"I never told you," she pointed out, and looked into his eyes with him still between her legs.

"Why would you do this when you knew?" He was puzzled. Why she would sleep with him, since she was a virgin?

"I wanted to. I trust in you." She didn't move.

"Aw, Christa, you shouldn’t trust in someone like me." He proceeded to get up.

"But I do, Amsterdam. For some reason, I do, and I know you’re a good person," she told him, kissing his lips.

"I should leave before I do anything more wrong." He withdrew from her and was about to put on his clothes when she stopped him.

"Please don’t. I wanna share this with you, and only you," she pleaded with him.

"You sure?" He wanted to make sure she was positive.

"Yes," she said lovingly.

He kissed her, continued to make love to her, and she felt the awful pain again. She wondered to herself why she wanted to rid herself of her virginity so badly to the first man she had laid eyes on, but it wasn’t like that. It was love at first sight.

When they were done, he laid back, and she fell asleep in his arms. Amsterdam held her and closed his eyes.

Johnny woke him up a few seconds later.

"Hey, Amsterdam?" He shook him.

Amsterdam awoke, covering Christa.

"Hey, Johnny. What’s wrong?" He got up.

"Nothing. You slept with Christa?" He was amazed.

"Yeah. Why?" Amsterdam asked.

"I thought you were into Jenny," Johnny said.

"I was. Guess I ain’t now, huh?" He smiled.

"Johnny?" Christa asked, lying there in the nude.

"Yeah, Christa?" he asked, looking at her pure white flesh.

"What time is it?" She did not know how long she had been asleep, but knew it wasn't long.

"Morning, I think. Anyway, I just was coming to bed, but since you two are using it, I guess I will leave," he said.

She couldn’t say anything, since Amsterdam and herself were undressed.

"Okay. See you later, Johnny." She lay back down with Amsterdam.

"Night, Christa, Amsterdam," he said, and opened the door.

Johnny headed out the door, not saying a word. He found a place to sleep and closed his eyes.

Jenny walked down the hallway and found Johnny there.

"Hey, Johnny? Wake up," she said, poking him in the shoulder.

"Jenny?" He wiped his eyes.

"Why are you on the floor?" Jenny wondered why he would sleep on the floor.

"Amsterdam and Christa wanted to be alone," he explained.

"Alone?" She was curious.

"They slept together," he said, yawning.

Jenny was a little upset, even a little jealous. She knew Amsterdam had liked her, but he had never gotten too close to her since that night at the dance a few weeks ago. She guessed he needed a release from all the sexual tension they had caused each other. She figured that was what it was.

Chapter Two
Stories