THE FIRE WITHIN
Chapter Five
Amsterdam was in the church,
gathering supplies to fix it. He had found it soon after killing Happy Jack,
who was sent to kill him by Bill.
That night a few weeks ago, he
had been going to go to Sparrow's Pagoda and kill Bill in remembrance of the
day his father had died, but then Christa had gotten hurt and that had sort of
delayed his attempt. So, he had developed more ambition now to kill Bill.
Christa stayed by Amsterdam’s
side. He helped her get better. Tommy stayed by her side, too. Even though she
didn’t need him, he was there for her.
*****
In the following days and weeks,
the tribes gathered. Christa didn’t join in the conference at all. It was a man
thing only. She feared for their lives, but if they had to fight to survive,
then that was what they must do.
*****
Christa looked at Jenny. She knew
she wanted Amsterdam. She knew because she needed him, too. She looked at him
from across the room, and he stared straight back. Sometimes, she wondered if
he loved her or not. Did he hate her for being related to Bill? Sometimes, she
wondered. He hadn’t touched her at all. She could feel them falling apart. She
turned to Jenny.
"Jenny?" She gave her a
strange look.
"Yeah?" Jenny looked at
her, removing her eyes from Amsterdam.
"Take care of him for
me." Christa looked at Jenny, not really trusting her.
"Who?" Jenny wondered.
"Amsterdam. I love him, but
I have to leave." She felt she must, for the sake of their baby.
"Leave? But why?" Jenny
asked.
"I must. I can’t say why. Do
you promise, Jenny?" Christa was desperate. She needed Jenny.
"I promise, but don’t you
think you should talk to him first?" Jenny asked.
"Talking will not take away
the fact that I am related to Bill. He must hate me for keeping it from
him." Christa felt like tainted meat, ugly and unwanted.
"You don’t know that."
Jenny knew she wanted Amsterdam, but she wouldn’t take advantage of a situation
like this, even though she knew she had a chance.
"I know that, but what if
it’s true?" She thought about it. "Maybe you’re right. My mother ran
away from her past, but I will not do that ever. I must face him." Christa
got up.
She strode across the room and
went up to him.
"We need to talk." She
stood there, looking down at him.
"Now?" Amsterdam asked.
"Yes, now." She walked
away from prying ears.
"What’s on your mind?"
he asked.
"I have to know something
before I make a decision." She stood there, not looking at him in the eye.
"A decision about
what?" he asked.
"I have to know if you love
me or not." She waited for his answer, turning her back to him.
"What? You know I do. Is
something wrong?" He wondered what had brought this on.
"No. I just haven’t been
close to you, and I wanted to know if you still care." She turned toward
him, feeling a little more cheerful.
"Of course I still love you
and care about you. Now, why did you bring this up?" He looked at her. She
still hadn’t answered his question.
"I just thought that,
because I am related to your enemy, you might hate me." She looked down at
the floor.
"I may hate the fact that
he’s your uncle, but my feelings for you have not changed." He lifted her
chin, smiling at her.
"Are you sure?" She had
to ask and be sure.
"I’m sure." He kissed
her lips.
"I love you, and after this
war is over and we raise our child, I hope he’s just like you," she said
flat out.
"Child? Christa, we are far
away from that." He took her hand and started to walk away.
"Not that far." Christa
smiled at him.
He looked at her face, puzzled,
and then he knew what she meant.
"A child?" He smiled.
"Yes. Our child." She
smiled back. "Amsterdam, I want him or her to take your name I don’t want
it to be a Cutting or a Connor. I want it to be a Vallon," she said
proudly.
"I understand, but I don’t
think we are ready for marriage." He knew what he had to do, but why
couldn’t he do it?
"Maybe not, but even if we
marry for one day, I would be the happiest woman alive. If you don’t want me
after that, I will understand." Christa wanted to make this very easy for
him. She didn’t hold him to any responsibility.
"I don’t think…" he
began to say before she put her hand on his mouth.
"Shh…we’ll talk later.
That’s all I wanted to say." She walked away and left him to his thoughts.
*****
Christa thought about her
childhood and remembered something she used to do.
She went outside, placed some
bottles in a row, and took some knives she had kept as a girl. She turned
around, threw one, and she hit her target. She kept doing it over and over
until she hit all her targets.
Someone clapped.
"Bravo! You have the Cutting
blood in you." Bill was astonished.
"What do you want?" She
turned around, hearing that familiar voice.
"Nothing. Just passing
through. Are you still with your little friends?" He gave her a chilling
smile.
"If I am, it’s nothing to
you!" she retorted.
"You might want to mind your
tongue, young lady," he warned her.
Christa went on her way, ignoring
Bill, but then turned around and faced him.
"You know, Uncle, no matter
how bad you were to my mother, she told me to tell you she loved you!"
Christa yelled.
He listened, but didn’t say a
word.
Christa picked up her knives and
said nothing more.