The Daily Travesty
Okay, we admit it, the rumors are true. No, not the ones
that B.C. is working secretly to sabotage the utterly blasphemous
and misguided production of the upcoming live-action Lord of the Rings movie-- that's still
under investigation. However, it is now confirmable that we are
contemplating a new name for The Daily Travesty. Hence we are turning it
into a contest, wherein all readers
may submit ideas, and the winner shall receive... well... nothing special.
We really can't afford a nice prize. But you will get your name
announced and the satisfaction of knowing that your smart-assed idea was better
than everyone else's. Please email your entries to the editor.
The Inside Story!
THE LAW OF FIVES
The Law of Fives is one of the oldest Erisian Mysterees.
It was first revealed to Good Lord Omar and is one of the great contributions to
come from The Hidden Temple of the Happy Jesus.
POEE [The PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC]
subscribes to the Law of Fives of Omar's sect. And POEE also recognizes
the Holy 23 (2+3=5) that is incorporated by Episkopos Dr. Mordecai Malignatius,
KNS, into his Discordian sect, the Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria.
The Law of Fives states simply that: ALL THINGS HAPPEN IN FIVES,
OR ARE DIVISIBLES BY OR ARE MULTIPLES OF FIVE, OR ARE SOMEHOW DIRECTLY OR
INDIRECTLY APPROPRIATE TO 5.
The Law of Fives is never wrong.
In the Erisian Archives is an old memo from Omar to Mal-2: "I
find the Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look."