"Buffy's Next Job..."
PG-13
Disclaimer: All BTVS characters remain the property of Joss "the Boss" Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and all other owner/creators of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer series...
Archived at the "normal" Buffyverse (Note the quotes!) page of the Buffy Rebecca verse, www.angelfire.com/zine2/buffyrebecca/index.html
Summary: Buffy tries politics again...
I figured it was only fair the other side take a whack...
***
About 8 am, Washington, D.C...
Buffy sat at her desk, looking out the window to her side...Not much of a desk and not much of a view, but what the hell...She was in Washington...D.C....The pulsing center of national power and decision-making...Her fingers on the throbbing pulse of the national heartbeat...
Ok, she was a jumped-up file clerk with a fancy title...But heck, her new boss was one of the most prominent figures on the national scene, if currently not quite as powerful as she'd once been...
She looked at Willow Rosenberg standing by her desk...Clearly a bit nervous, Willow realized...
Ummn...Wil?...
"First day jitters, Buf...They'll pass...You're gonna do just fine..."
Yeah...
"Say, I gotta thank you again for getting me in here...Especially after that little flap in California with the governor..."
"No prob, girlfriend..." Willow grinned... "Just hope it works out for you...I think you'll find it as intense and interesting, but a leetle different from night Patrol...I know I've sometimes found the ins and outs here more complex and twisty than my most complicated spell..."
Yeah...Ummn, say, Wil...
"I only met her for a few minutes during the final interview...What's she really like?..."
"Ah...Sharp...Intense...Tough...But not what you hear on TV and from those loons on radio...She's really very supportive and I think..."
The door in the main hallway opened and Senator Hillary Clinton marched in, flanked by a couple of staffers... "Coffee..." she called at Buffy as she passed...And moved on into an office down the hall...
Coffee?...Buffy eyed Willow...Who'd moved over to her own desk in haste... "But that's not my..."
"Coffee..." Willow nodded... "Black, one Equal..."
Right...Buffy sighed...
***
"Senator?..." Buffy came over as the Senator came out, alone... "Coffee's just about ready..."
"Fine..." the Senator eyed her... "Ms. Summers?...Buffy, right?..."
Yes, Senator...
"Nice to have you aboard...And so eager..." she eyed the clock... "Your friend Ms. Rosenberg spoke highly of you..." she smiled...Looking her over carefully... "Very highly..." Willow smiling from her desk...
"In fact...She's told me you possess some very unique attributes..."
Ummn...Buffy stared at Willow...Who gave a noncommital look...
Attributes...Hmmn...
Ummn...A hard look from the Senator...
"So you're a Slayer?..."
"A....Wha?....Willow told you that?..." she burst out, a slight glare to her friend...
"I'd heard something about you before...We're not as totally clueless in DC with things beyond politics as you might have heard...But yeah, Ms. Rosenberg confirmed the rumors..."
"Frankly, it's a large part of why I agreed to take you...See..." her cell phone buzzed...
"Hey..." she blew a kiss into the phone, cooing a bit... "How's my boy?...You on your way?...Great..."
"Say, Bill...I got our Slayer here..." Buffy eyed Willow... "Yeah...She's just startin' today..."
The Senator put a hand over the phone... "Bill's dying to meet you...He's really got into all the stuff about you and your Watchers since he left office...Do you mind talking with us about it for a few when he comes over?..."
Ummn...Sure...Buffy blinked...Bill?...
"Ok, honey...Bye..." the Senator closed the phone... "We can't talk now, Buffy...The guys..." she indicated her office... "Will be getting antsy...And not a little jealous...At me spending time shooting the breeze with a new aide...But when Bill gets here..."
If you're ok with it?...
Ummn...Sure...(Brightly)...
"Great...And while I'm here, I may as well get you started on these..." she pulled out a huge box of reports from under a desk... "Please summarize each report on no more than two pages and have it on my desk by Monday...Willow can show how I like 'em set up..."
Bill loves to wade through these things, but I prefer em boiled down...she smiled...And stopped just as she started to turn away...As Buffy stared at the huge pile...
"I do want you to know we both apologize for what happened with the Initiative...It was a J. Edgar Hooverish holdover from the Second World War, paid for out of black box CIA/NSA funds, run on its own...We didn't even know about it until after the situation went critical...If we had...And known about you..." she paused...
"I understand..." Buffy nodded...The Senator patted her arm and went back to her office where indeed several staffers gave a slight glare through the open door at the nobody aide who'd kept the Boss in chit-chat...
"Willow..." the Slayer whirled on her friend, currently in innocent wallflower mode... "You told her I was the Slayer?!...Well, a Slayer?..."
"She already kinda knew about us, Buf...And it did clinch the job for ya..."
A hard glare...But there was another question...
When Bill gets here?...
Honey?...
"Was she talking about?..."
Oh, yeah...
"But...She seemed..."
Yeah...Willow nodded... "The shock wears off eventually...Hard as it is to believe..."
"But I thought...I mean everybody says...I mean, heck to be able to stay with that creep...?"
"Oh, right..." Willow glared now... "Powerful, strong woman who can handle herself...And who doesn't give a damn about her aides' inclinations...Why, she must be gay...Geesh, Buffy...I didn't think you'd buy into that stuff..."
"Well...I didn't mean...But you're sure...?"
"I haven't pulled her aside and asked her, if that's what you mean...But until she says she is...And as long as she seems to be retaining the big schmuck..."
"That's the thing..." Buffy looked at the office behind her...Closed and busy inside...
Yeah...Willow nodded... "Believe me, all of us had trouble dealing with it...Especially...When they get all..."
Schmoopy...
Schmoopy?...Them?...Him?...Her?
Schmoopy...Willow sighed...
"But after all he did?...To her and...?"
"You tell me..." Willow shrugged... "You're the expert on bizarre hetero relationships in this group, Buf..."
Of course...She paused...He is in therapy...I suppose the Senator wants to be supportive...
Therapy?...Yep...
"Intensive therapy...Of a very special kind we've seen before..."
"You mean as in Initiative-style therapy?...With a..."
"Chip...Yeah as in they took advantage of the Initiative's work...Tell William if you ever do see him, Senator Clinton may owe him for his heroic if involuntary contribution to behavioral research..."
"And it..."
"...Shocks him whenever he gets randy except with her...And trust me, it's hard to tell which is worse...Seeing him try to avoid looking at every female in range, or seeing them getting...Antsy..."
Eehew...
"Hey...It got William started on the road back...Whatever works, I guess..."
God...
"But it does work, right...? He isn't able to...?"
Cause I had enough of that in my last job...
Hmmn...Well...
"Is he able to get around it?..."
"Depends on what your definition of 'is' is..." Willow smiled...
Eehew...
"Make her gay, Wil...No one should have to suffer like that..."
Buffy...Willow clucked disapprovingly...C'mon...It is her business ya know...
***
Mid-morning break...
"So this is the Slayer..." Bill Clinton smiled kindly at Buffy as they sat in the empty conference room Willow had kept clear for the morning...Wincing just a bit as he did so...Willow giving Buffy a 'see?' look...Hillary and Willow seated beside him...
Geesh...Would've thought I've have him crumpled on the floor in pain if not dead...What, am I losing my attraction edge?...Buffy thought...
Is that why William doesn't?...
Of course I am in the good ole red 'professional Buffy' suit...And Mr. Clinton has been under therapy for a while...
"It's quite a story you must have to tell..." Clinton went on... "Eh, honey?..." A smile and nod to Hiliary who dropped her rather intense watchful look a couple of notches...Hmmn-hmm....She nodded back...
Well...Buffy shrugged a bit...
"To have saved the world...Several times...At your age..." Clinton sighed... "I only wish..." Another somewhat stronger wince...
Ummn...That we'd had a chance to see you in action...he finished...
"In battle and all..."
"Well...There are a lot of Slayers around now, sir..." she replied... Really?...he eyed her... "All as young and..." A more powerful wince brought his hand to his head...Hillary giving a slight frown...
Ummn... "All as courageous and strong as you?..."
We think so...she nodded... "The new Council and me, I mean...They're all turning out real well..."
"I'd love to learn more about your organization..." Clinton gave a thoughtful look... "How it's managed to conceal your secret for so long and its history..."
"And about the other young ladies?...And how they're getting on?..." Hillary added...A careful look at Bill...Who seemed to be making a huge effort
She visibly relaxed a bit...
Score another triumph for behavioral therapy...Willow thought...
***
"So..." Buffy eyed Willow...
"Well..." Willow gave a perky look back...
"That's the ex-President..."
Yep...
"He seemed...Nice..."
"Oh, he is...Very...Just..." Willow hesitated...Looking over to the Senator's closed office...
Do not push the chip too far...
"I don't think it's quite as effective as Spike's was..." she explained...
Why does she think I'd push the chip too far?...Buffy frowned at her friend a bit...I been looking that desperate lately?...
Wait a minute...
" 'Sides, really, he's not all bad...Heck, we both voted for him, you know...I honestly believe he does care about the issues...When his libido doesn't get the best of him...Maybe the chip and therapy thing will actually make a difference..."
"And he is so funny...And smart...And kinda cute and cuddly...I suppose I can see why..." she continued, a tad dreamily...Buffy staring at her in some shock...
Ummn...Willow blinked... "I mean, if I weren't 'gay now'...And in a sexist pig kinda way of course..."
"Willow...?" Buffy continued to stare as Willow avoided her look... "He didn't...? He tried...With you?..."
Ummn...Well...
"It was before she made him get the chip...And it wasn't really a pass per se..."
Depending on how you define "pass..."
Buffy stared over to the closed office door...Where the Clintons had been rather quietly on their own since the other aides had been sent off on various tasks...
"You sure he hasn't got some kinda magics on him?..."
"Nah...Like I told you...It's just charisma...Heck, look at your romantic choices, Summers..." she frowned then grinned at Buffy's sheepish look...
"Well...William's turned out well..." she began... "If I can ever get him to believe in me and return my damned calls..." A sympathetic pat from Willow...Well...
"He'll come round, Buf...He's probably just terrified you'll take it back...You should go and see him this weekend...Make him see you meant it..."
Yeah...she sighed... "If I can get through this pile..." She indicated the stack of reports the Senator had left with her...
Still...She eyed Willow...A slight grin...
"I can't believe she actually...I mean..." she glanced at the closed office door...
"What can ya do?..." Willow shrugged... "Sometimes fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly, I guess..."
"But that fish?...Urggh..."
"I mean...Talk about Tammy Wynette and 'standin' by your man'..." Buffy chuckled...Willow giving a sudden startled, desperate look, she whirled round to find Ms. Clinton glaring coolly from behind, a sympathetic-but-rather-relaxed-looking Bill behind her...
"You're fired..." Hillary told her coldly...
***