"Immortal Beloved XLI..."

A shortie...

PG-13

Spoilers for Angel to "The Girl in Question..."

Disclaimer: Everything but the 'Soames Walthrop' and I don't use it here is Joss' and ME's

Summary: What can I say these things are like candy or Lays...

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LA...Offices of Burkle (Winifred Illyria Burkle), Gunn, and Walthrop...Eight months after the defeat of the Senior Partners...

"William S. Walthrop...How may...Buffy?..." he blinked at the phone...

"Spike!...You've got to come...I need you!...The world needs you!..."

Well...She hesitated...Ok, not the world world per se...But an island...A beautiful island...Where several of our Slayers hail from...Is in danger...

Uh-huh...William eyed the phone...

"Just what the hell is the problem, girl?..."

"Giant killer shrews, Spike...Cursed ones...Well, mostly genetically enhanced...But a spell is involved...See the island shamans wanted the genetic researchers off their island...So..."

"So it was the inhabitants themselves who called down the bogeymen, eh?...And now they're screamin' for help?..."

Well, yeah...But lives are at stake, Spike!...And like I said, the island is home to a couple of our Slayers...

"Killer shrews?...What's the big deal?..."

"Humongous killer shrews...Magically protected from harm...Well, not completely...A military post on the island killed a bunch with heavy artillery from the US test range...But they're overrunning the place and it'll be days before more troops and weapons can get in..."

"So?...Why not have your home-grown Slayers, plus a few hundred extra, fly in and deal?..."

"Spike?!...They're magically enhanced...We might lose some of our Slayers..."

But...she paused...There is a way to stop them at a very low cost...

Uh-huh...he sighed...

Why do I think I know what that very low cost item is?...he thought...

"And it would be another chance for my Champion to prove himself..." her voice was encouraging...

"Yeah...Ummn...Buffy?...You know I don't remember you checkin' in on me after I got back...Even after I got my hands cut off helpin' your psycho Slayer, Dana..."

"Ummn...I didn't know you were back..."

"Odd that you knew to call me now..." he noted...

Ummn...See...Andrew only told me long...Really long after...

"And then there's the little matter of poor ole Angel...You didn't even come to his funeral service..."

"I was busy...Besides I sent a card...Well, I bought one, but I lost it...Anyway, Spike..."

William...he corrected... "Spike was my fiend...I'm human-souled, remember?...I want to be called by my human name now...I've earned it and then some..."

Oh...Right... "Anyway, William...What's need here is a Champion...A self-sacrificing one..."

Like you...her voice was warm...

Uh-huh...

"See there's this necklace that the Champion wears...And it attracts the shrews..."

Uh-huh...

"Then they eat him...And they all die..."

Indigestion, no doubt...he noted...

"And all those lives and that nice island property...Saved..."

"Just how many lives are at stake here?..."

"Ummn...Nearly 200...I think...But I did mention a couple of our Slayers are from there..."

"Nearly 200...Right...Ummn, Buffy...Couldn't they be evacuated while the military comes in..."

"Well, some are getting out right now...But, it's their home, Sp...er Will...And they naturally don't want to go..."

Right...Well, Buf...I would suggest your Pago-Pago Slayers offer themselves for their homeland...Or perhaps the bloody shamans who started the whole thing...

"Will...That's not the attitude I expect from my Champion..." she sighed... "These are human lives we're talking about...It's not like they're already dead with no reason to continue their worthless existence..."

"Well...You're already dead, Buffy..." he noted... "Why don't you wear the necklace and get your face eaten?..."

"Spike?!!..."

"Sorry...How's about Willow?...Can't she hex 'em?..."

"Still on her astral plane tour..."

Pity...he noted...We missed her too...

Hmmn... "Yeah...Sorry about Ms. Burkle..."

"Yes...So were we...Especially me...I haven't met many like her..."

A pause on the line...Buffy obviously waiting for an "...and you..."

"Sp...er William...?" she finally gave up, a slightly miffed tone in her voice now... "Will you come?...For me?..."

"Buf...I might consider coming to fight your shrews...If I thought the situation merited it...But be fed to them?...For 200 or less folks who could get away if they had any brains?...No, girl...I think not...Why not try good ole Harris?..."

"The sacrifice has to be supernatural..." Ah...

"Besides, Xander already said no...We were gonna try and fool em with a charm..."

"Nice to hear Harris has developed a brain..."

"Well, he's got responsibilities now...And he's human...I mean...I view you as human now..." she noted hastily... "With the soul and all...Of course...But..."

Just not 'that human'...he finished...

"William..."

"Buffy..." he sighed... "I'm not saying I wouldn't gladly make the sacrifice again for the world any day...Maybe even for the right group of people...Hell, you know me, probably for the right girl..."

But...I have responsibilities now...Like dear ole Harris...An investigative/legal firm to run, a fight against Evil to wage here in LA in ole Angel's name...

"We can handle that, Will...Just call Giles, he'll send some Watchers to run things after...Well, if...You go..."

"Sorry, Buf...Not this one...Perhaps another time...Say..."

Why don't you ask the Immortal?...He's supernatural, right?...

"Like to feed him to killer shrews..." she groused... "The bastard dumped me...Right after you guys fought the Partners and Angel died..."

Said he couldn't believe I wasn't going to you in the hospital...Or to Angel's funeral...

That I had no compassion...Me, no compassion...Buffy Summers, the Queen of compassion...

"Hard to believe..." he kindly noted...

"You know I was busy, right?...Right..."

Sure...he sighed...I never expected it...

"C'mon, William...For me?...Couldn't you see your way clear on this one?...Just one last sacrifice for your Slayer who you know loves you..."

Within reason, of course...Allowin' for the idea of us as a real thing to be impossible...she hastily noted...

"No picket fence, right?..." she asked...

"Well, not with you, Buf...I know that...Though actually I am having a nice fence put in round my new place...Sarah likes picket fences..."

Sarah?...

"Oh, right...You've never shown the slightest interest in me or my doings since I died for you...Yeah, I'm getting married...Next month, actually...In fact I think you know the lass..."

"A demon?...Did you find some tramp vamp who claims she's got a soul?...You know you can't believe every..."

"Human, Buf...In fact...A Slayer...You know, the divorced actress who resembles you..."

Hmmn?...

"She trained with you three months ago...Refused to stay in England and led that rebellion of Slayers against you?...Got the Council to let them have their lives back, instead of hanging round you there?...Pointed out that you'd actually had a preety nice life here in sunny CA with Mummy and all..."

Ummn...?

"Scooby-doo..." he said drily...

Oh...That Sarah... (Should've killed that bitch...she murmured under her breath)

"That Sarah...Yeah..."

"You could've waited for me to check in, you know..." she fumed...

"Eternity ain't that long, Buf..." he replied... "And my Sarah's a great girl...Just selfless enough to save the world, but devoted to her family and career as well..."

"Divorced, isn't she?..."

"You just heard me say so, girl...Yeah..."

"I remember her, William...Very opinionated, ruthless...Though kinda family-centered, I admit...She wouldn't follow my orders, wanted to go home...And led that rebellion just cause Giles and I wouldn't let her run off home to her hubby..."

"Sure sounds like the girl for me...Care to come to the wedding?...That is unless you sacrifice yourself to the killer shrews..."

"William..." a shocked tone... "I'm the Slayer Counselor General...I can't throw my life away..."

Unless of course it's for Dawny...Part of me...she noted...

Right...he sighed...Well, if your schedule permits we'd be pleased to have you...

"If I say yes, will you come to fight the shrews?..." an eager tone...

"As in...So you and your Slayers can club me one and feed me to them?...No thanks..."

William?...Again the shocked tone...

Gee he knows me so well...she thought sadly...And now...I've lost him...

Like hell...she grimly correctly...Nobody steals the Slayer's boyfriend...

Especially some junior slayer, small s...Who resembles me...

"I'll be there...Tell Sarah...Thanks..." she told him...

Maybe I could even drop by early...she suggested... "We could get caught up on things...?"

Like the most intense sex on God's Earth...she thought...Hmmn, I had forgotten about that...Even better than with His asinine Benevolence...

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