Welcome to Issue 2!!!!!

Good day to you, ladies and gentlemen.  Well, after the success of the first issue of Mmmm, Juicy! the fanzine that refreshes the parts that other fanzines cannot reach, and which they frankly wouldn’t want to anyway, we have decided to follow it up with a second issue, which we have decided to call issue 2.  A controversial move I know, but one that we hope will not offend you by being too outrageous.  To go with this brave new direction, there have been some changes in the editorial staff here at Juicy Acres.  I, Yalson, have taken over as co-editor after my predecessor, Fanny Strudelle, was killed in a freak fish-sequinning incident, a condition that later turned out to be fatal. 

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Whilst the details of this shocking tragedy are still sketchy at this stage, it appears that Fanny’s enthusiasm for sewing sequins on to things that don’t usually have sequins on them in general, and aquatic species in particular, may have led to her downfall when she tried to administer the sparkly treatment to a bloody great shark.  The shark was apparently rather non-plussed at this idea (despite the fact that Fanny was clearly doing it a favour, as grey is soooo last year) and immediately tried to attack her.  It is at this point that the details become difficult to verify, as the water soon became clouded with blood and sequins.  It is a moot point as to who the blood belonged to, however, with some independent observers pointing out that some blood would be likely to come from the shark during the sequin application process.  It’s not likely though, is it?  It would have been extremely difficult to sequin anything anyway, what with all the biting and thrashing around that was going on. 

M  a  N  I  c

Anyway, the upshot of all this is that when things calmed down, all that was left in the water was slick of sequins and a slightly happier shark.  No trace was left of our intrepid former co-editor at all, and because of this she has already become a Ritchie Manic-like figure around the office, with some poor souls refusing to believe that she has gone and that she will return from her close shave in a few months with a lovely tan and a whole trunk full of exotic animals in lame’ suits.  I, on the other hand, believe that Fanny Strudelle will not be returning, and that her passion for giving sequins to fish has finally led to her cashing in her chips*…..

*Not to be confused with the chips she was allegedly looking for on the night of the sequinned trout.

Details of Fanny’s fish-sequinning exploits, and those of Cassandra the sequinned rainbow trout, can be found later on in this issue.  Yalson would like to point out that any reports of him recently spending time in the Caribbean annoying sharks are entirely unconnected with the fact that he got Fanny’s job.  No animals were harmed during the writing of this piece, although two penguins had a brief argument over who owned a certain fish and a horse became slightly tearful over the result of the Ipswich-Leicester match.  Not that we can be held responsible for the disagreements and sporting allegiances of every animal that walks past.  We just thought you might like to know that we weren’t involved.  Promise.