So much shame behind the lies
So many scares on such young skin
So much pain lies within
All the pain builds inside
All the tears you try to hide
You know it's not the right thing to do
But no one seems to understand you.
One more cut, not that deep
The blood will finally let you sleep
The calm has come after the storm
You are alive, the blood is warm
You know you must hide
And keep the shame you have inside
You wish there was some other way
You wish you knew the words to say
Fall apone deaf ears and unopened eyes
You aren't proud of what you do
You wish the whispers weren't about you.
Nobody seems to understand except the blade you hold in your hand.
You need proof that you are alive not cold and dead like you feel inside.
The hurt is so much and it will not fade,
It is your flesh that has paid
You pay for the pain, the shame, and the lies,
And feel the guilt when people speak your name
You just want someone to understand and tell you it will be okay, and hold your hand.
Not ignore the problem and hope it will pass,
Not say it's a phase or even a fad,
One more scare there's nothing to lose
You don't do it for them you do it for you
Do you still try to hide or make it known?
You live in a glass house do you cast the first stone?
You know some will call you insane and some will call you worse,
before you were your parent's dream now you are their curse.
You don't know how long you can hide behind the lies that you tell,
Being a klutz is hard but it hides the truth so well
How else do you explane the cuts, scrapes, burns, and broken bones?
You fall odwn stair or slip with a knife and sometimes you don't even know.
They don't see what they don't want to see, and you don't feel what you don't want to feel.
The pain may subside but it returns after the last cut heals.
Sometimes you wonder if you will run out of skin before you run out of pain
Or be able to stop it all before you go insane.
You know that you aren't trying to die, your acctually trying to live
Your not trying to take your life, it's life your trying to give.
Your trying to make people see the hurt you feel inside Trying to use your pain to open their eyes
You don't do this for fun or try to fit in Your making external the hell within.
~*~Unknown Author~*~