Crossroads

Why did he always do this to her, Nothing she ever said to him made it to his heart, he always stopped it at his head and then acted on it.
Harm held her, though if her rage got anymore out of hand he had to admit he would lose his grip on her. “Sarah it is okay.” his voice was rough with emotion. “Is it because your here?”
She pulled away from with a force he didn’t recognize. “Its always because I’m here....” it was at this moment she realized she wasn’t in control. She couldn’t control what she was feeling or how she was reacting and it scared her.

There was a moment in her life right before she joined the Marines that she determined in her heart that she would never be out of control of her life again, no person would ever make her lose control of her life, or her feelings.
Yet standing in front of her was a man who in her world hung the moon, and one word from his mouth, one look of those deep blues could make tears spring to her eyes, laughter take over her heart and pure human madness spill out from her very core
And though she knew this, she was helpless in spite of her strength. She hated it that he did this to her, but longed for the shelter it provide.

“I don’t care that its always because your here.” it came from his heart, it was the truth. He was glad she couldn’t walk away, he was glad she never got past what they had. He was glad she was his, she always would. He was proud of that.
“You arrogant, self righteous, senseless bastard.” the words came flooding out as she stood tall across from him. “You have me wrapped around your finger and you like it. You like knowing that I’m here for you when you get tired of whatever flavor of the week your with. Damn you for turning me into this.”
He hadn’t meant it the way it had came out, but the truth was he just didn’t care anymore. He was going to make this right. “Sarah.”
“No ... don’t you dare .... I don’t know why I keep giving your my heart... over and over again.” she was paced back and forth fighting for ever ounce of control she could grasp. “And you don’t care, I don’t even think you ever have.”
Now that was where she was wrong and his angry rose for a moment. How many times has he tried to tell her. “Your the one who won’t wait.... who doesn’t listen to me.” “Listen to you... when....”

“Sarah I told you... I told you I was only this way with you. What the hell did you think that meant?” “What now I’m suppose read your mind ... and what wait forever... and all you said was your ‘this way’ that is not telling me anything.” “I told you again, on the porch that night.... I told you he was right. That some people were in love with you, even then you didn’t listen.” “Oh I did listen... and again I laid down my heart and soul in front of you... and you ... you kissed me back... I tried to pull away and you didn’t let me... I saw in your eyes at that moment yet you let me go.... its so easy for you to go back to Renee or who ever it is you have in your bed at the time. Its always like that with you.” “Its easy to go to bed with someone, its alot hard to love someone and give them every thing you have, every moment of your life. Its alot hard to trust someone with your heart.” it was the most truthful, heartfelt thing he had ever said to her. It was how he felt about her. “It hard to lay down with someone who knows you better than you know yourself.” Oh God he was scared. She saw it in his eyes. As if he was in a tomcat headed for the ground nose first. A moment passed as her angry subsided. She put her hands on her hips. “You’ve got to stop doing this to me.” she saw him move closer to her and she really did want to run, she just wasn’t sure if she wanted to run towards him or away from him. He knew this was it. This had to stop between. One way or another they had to pick a road and go down it, but he wasn’t sure he had the strength. ~Back~ ~Fanfic Home~ ~Next~