Art Bracke's Personal Pages

MY FAMILY:

Kurt, 34

Josh, 17

Robert, 27

Josh & Brother, Jake

Josh's Friend, Tim (Webmaster)

My oldest (adopted) son, Kurt, was a "leftover" from my boys' home program, which closed in 1985 (see the Clippings page); he had nowhere to go except to some other group-care facility; so I took him in at the age of twelve and adopted him at fourteen but, for him, it was already too late; he started stealing cars at fifteen and is currently serving three concurrent twenty-year and three concurrent ten-year prison terms in another state for numerous felony convictions that occurred in 1997. His release-date there is February 17, 2016 but upon release, he must finish three years of a ten-year sentence previously imposed in Norfolk, VA. He'll be forty-two years old when he finally regains his freedom, if he survives; you see, he's also HIV positive.
Robert, my middle (adopted) son with whom I wrote our book, Running Against The Wind, is currently living in another state. Since he turned twenty-one, he has opted out of numerous substance abuse detoxification and rehabilitation programs prior to their completion. Although he has above-average intelligence, he is unable to read or write due to severe learning disabilities, which may be the result of fetal drug and/or alcohol exposure. Thanks to the Virginia Department of Vocational Rehabilitation, he was given the opportunity to serve a culinary apprenticeship at a four-star restaurant in Williamsburg, VA, learning and refining his cooking skills. He has recently accepted a position cooking at a brand-new restaurant that opened right after Thanksgiving, 2002. You can learn much more about Robert in Running Against The Wind, the true story of his first twenty-one years, which can be purchased online at the publisher's web site at www.albooktross.com under the Adoption/Foster Care category. You can also email me to request a FREE copy, which I will send you as an email attachment (in PDF format - requires Adobe Acrobat Reader, which you can download for free, by clicking on the link below to the right). One critic suggested that Running Against The Wind should be available in all high school libraries and that it should be required reading for any teen who may be at risk for alcohol or drug abuse.

My youngest (adopted) son, Josh, came to live with me on October 26, 2001. His adoption was "finalized" by the Circuit Court on July 22, 2002. He was placed with me through a Private Adoption Agency here in Virginia that specializes in the adoptive placemen

t of Virginia's Waiting Foster Children. He has adjusted well in my home, despite a "rocky" start and has made many friends in our sparsely-populated, rural community. School has been especially challenging for Josh, not academically but behaviorally, so he's currently attending a private school that specializes in teaching children whose behavior has proven to be beyond the capabilities of the local public schools (and, especially, the middle-school principal!). He still maintains contact with his younger brother, Jacob. Josh played right field for the Pirates Little League Baseball Team this past season. He also enjoys football, basketball and soccer, and he swims like a fish! His favorite musical group is the rock band, "Cypress Hill." (Ugh!)

"Challenging children [like these, whom I have adopted and those whom I have fostered and mentored] can easily become casualties of 'the system.' Teachers and administrators, although having the best of intentions, are largely taught conventional skills for working with the average child. Most of these techniques backfire when applied to the 'difficult' child. Often, the harder they try traditional strategies, the worse the situation gets. This is because they inadvertently wind up deepening the impression that many children have ... that the most reliable and efficient ways to get noticed, cared for and have energized and animated involvement is when things are going wrong." *

"Many children feel virtually invisible unless they are acting-out or failing to do their work. Their experience of the school environment, one that is unfortunately all too accurate, is that the most interesting and animated responses from the school staff happens under the worst of circumstances ... when rules are being broken, when work isn't being done and when grades are poor. Children love animation and energy. Skillful personnel always hold children accountable for problem behaviors but always reserve the animated and energetic responses for positive behaviors ... and they have an uncanny ability to strategically see and encourage positive behaviors." *

"The Children's Success Foundation is dedicated to bringing The Nurtured Heart Approach to school communities across the country. Real prevention involves facilitating successful experiences for all children, not just those predisposed to being easy to work with. When children feel successful on the inside as a result of acknowledgement and recognition throughout the school day, they begin to think and act from a focal point of success. Children who are proactively and skillfully directed toward feeling successful make good decisions and do not participate in any levels of verbal or physical aggression."* (Our local public school personnel could learn a great deal from the use of this approach!)

have also maintained ongoing relationships with some of the foster children whom I have raise

d over the years, especially John, now thirty-eight. He lives in an adjacent county, about forty minutes away, and has two daughters ages seventeen and eleven and three step sons. John is an excellent auto mechanic and is currently working as the master painter in a local auto-body shop. As a youngster he used to build impeccable model cars, including the finest details. We get together occasionally for cookouts, or just to visit and keep up with each other's lives.

Occasionally, I still take on the task of mentoring a youngster who, for whatever reason, could benefit from a sympathetic ear, a nonjudgmental friend and a positive role model. Although these are not foster or adopted children, I still consider them a part of my "extended family."

Want to learn more about the positive effects that mentors have had on others? There's a great new book available, The Person Who Changed My Life: Seventy-Five Prominent Americans Recount Their Mentors. "At some point in the odyssey of our lives, most of us have been affected by caring adults who made a difference; their example led us to encounter the world. The Person Who Changed My Life is a collection of essays in which individuals who have distinguished themselves in their fields write about the men and women who served as their mentors."

A Couple of "Sharks"

* http://www.difficultchild.com/CSF.htm