**Take your time writing the obituary.
Do not leave it up to
the funeral home or newspaper.
Your entire family knew this person the best
and you should use this last chance
to let the world know them too.
** Do not be in a hurry to give away the clothes.
You will love to sit with a sweater,
hold it, smell it, and remember your child.
Maybe not yet, but save everything for a few months.
It is too hard to ask for things back,
once you give them away.
**It is fairly common today to play special
music, at the funeral. Favorites songs
of your child often help you also.
**Take along most of your family pictures
of this person for the funeral visit,
and share your beautiful memories.
**Keep in mind that you can never RE-do
any of these special days.
**Think seriously about the eulogy,
if you want to give it, DO IT !
Many times the visitors are asked
to share a loving memory.
Yes, it is really difficult,
but tomorrow is too late.
The visitation and funeral services
are for YOU and your family.
**Some mothers remember everything
about these few days, while others
remember nothing.
You might think about taking a
tape-recorder for a friend to operate.
**Funerals are expensive.
You might think about having the services
at your church instead of the funeral home.
This along can save about $1,000.
**We all want the best for our children,
but buying the most expensive casket
should demand careful thought.
Maybe a less expensive one would save
enough money for a memorial scholarship fund.
**Instead of all of the flowers,
perhaps a designation in the paper
for contributions to a favorite charity.
**Instead of leaving the flowers at the cemetery,
why not ask that flowers go to local
hospitals or nursing homes.
**The earlier you can decide how you will
memorialize your child, then these
plans can be developed easily
with the help of friends.
**If you are not the type of person
that likes hugs, learn how
because hugs help alot.
** Consider taking lots of pictures
of the flowers, casket, and friends,
because you will think often of this day.
** Do the paperwork stuff early,
because the next few weeks get even harder.
Maybe it's shock that let's us
do what we have to do.
Be careful, because the shock does
wear off, then it is all for real.
