|
ITS PRESENCE, MOTIVATIONS, AND IMPORTANCE IN AMERICAN CULTURE by Trevor M. Wallace 
The human expression of kissing: Why has it risen to the forefront in physical expression of emotion? What motivates a kiss? What do the innumerous types of kisses mean in our culture? These questions have been proposed by numerous psychologists but pursued and answered by even less. Kissing and kisses vary in their types and motivations and due to lack of research into the subject very few solid conclusions can be made. This results in the creation of many theories and hypothesis concerning the subject matter that can only be backed up by a few reliable, yet potent resources. The act of kissing another person can be completed for many different reasons and in many different ways. There are separate unique psychological factors that motivate a person to engage in the act of kissing. However, a kiss is not a single action, motivated by a single cause. A kiss is many things caused by many motivators and everything is all interrelated. The phenomenon that is the kiss is such an immense topic that covers the span of psychology and has become an integrated part of our lives, presenting itself in almost every human situation imaginable.
Interestingly enough, kissing in couple relationship has shown dramatic decrease as the relationship progresses from dating to commitment to engagement to marriage. “While media research has incidentally addressed the portrayal of sex between married partners, this study specifically analyzed how sexuality between married couples is depicted in popular films, as represented by the top 25 movie video rentals of 1998. Of the 105 occurrences of sexual behavior, married partners represented 15% of the total compared to 85% for unmarried couples” (Dempsey, 21-36). This is mind stirring because one would think that with the commitment that comes with marriage, two individuals would be more intimate and close than before. However, evidence shows just the opposite. Kissing has become an everyday occurrence in our society. Everywhere we look, we are bound to see two people embraced in a kiss. This is a result from the effect of kissing portrayed by television and the movies. When kissing was being introduced as a form of intimate touching during the Middle Ages, “kissing of the hands was considered extremely intimate and arousing.” It was therefore reserved for only the highly royal and personal relations. Within the past few decades, kissing in public has been looked down upon and today “we are so overwhelmed with images of intercourse being all sexual contact, that kissing has become neglected except as a prelude to penetration.” Many blame movies and television and the influence they have over society’s rules and values. Before the advent of film entertainment, kissing was seen as reserved for extremely intimate experiences. Today, however, “you only have to watch anyone on television or in the movies to see what the kiss has become. Whereas people used to approach a kiss with their lips together, full, pursed and moist with anticipation, they now plunge towards each other with their mouths wide open as though they’re going to swallow each other’s tonsils.” (Gibson, 1-2) Thus, kissing has lost its intimate value as a result of its portrayal in movies and television. When kissing was first introduced on the big screen, it was seen as a revolutionary and racy act. However, throughout the years, more ideas and actions (including sex, single parenting, premarital sex, and homosexuality) have climbed to the forefront in televised programming and film. It is evident that back when kissing was new and now when sex is new on television that American culture was/is being redefined. Culture and society are changing because Americans know there are these new radical ideas and they are usually uneasy in accepting them. When these ideas are brought to the home through television or film, Americans can reassure themselves because they see other people committing these acts. Not only do actors commit these acts but also the scripts make them acceptable in the actors’ fictional world. For instance, in the early to mid-70s a sitcom came out on television called The Mary Tyler Moore Show. “Mary was the first sitcom character to take the Pill [and] … it was gently implied that she spent the night with a man without benefit of marriage” (Single Women in TV History, 1). These portrayals reflect the rising Feminist movement and the ideas of ‘free-love’ that circulated through the American populace. It is safe to assume that as a result of televisions positive portrayal of these acts that more Americans accepted the idea of ‘free-love’. It became more of a socially acceptably act as a result of its portrayal on television. Televised programs and movies provide the American with reassurance. They give them a world where everything is perfect and the outcome is always positive. They have the ability to change and formulate new opinions in the minds of Americans, easing them into acceptance of new radical acts. Kissing was only the beginning of this ‘media conducted sexual revolution’ that has since illustrated acts of sex, hedonism, homosexuality, rape, non-monogamous relations, and much more. In this paper the topic will be addressed in such a way as to touch on the most common types of kissing, the most common motivations for such kisses as seen in American culture. For the purposes of organization and structure I have grouped kisses into four main sets: the respect, compassionate, passionate, and the betrayal. Again it should be noted that kissing and all subsequent topics on kissing are extremely interrelated. Kissing is not a single thing, it is a combination of many emotions, both physical and mental wants, and is much more than just an action. The purpose for the research is to fulfill my interest in the subject matter and to develop a more reliable source for information on the act of kissing and its motivations. The origins of the kiss come from ancient pagan religions where followers would kiss the ground on which their chief walked as a form of paying homage. From there, kissing developed into a way to pay respect in the Roman years; a Roman emperor would allow one to kiss his different body parts based on their rank. For example a nobleman could kiss him on the lips, one of less importance on the hand and a member of the peasantry on the feet. This is the first instance of kissing being used to show some sort of affection to another person. The French introduced the formal use of kissing in relationships in which French dances each ended with a kiss. This idea of a kiss to signify mutual respect and affection quickly spread to other European and Asian countries. (The History and Secret of the Kiss, 1-2) The four groups of kisses each have their own physical characteristics but are all interrelated. The type of kiss in its physical form helps determine the type of motivation behind the kiss. A simple peck or quick touch of the lips tends to reveal a lessen emotion or one that doesn’t necessarily convey a strong emotion. A French kiss or a long lip-to-lip kiss can imply either passion or lust. Kisses given to the breasts, torso, legs, stomach and genitalia are caused by such intense emotions. However a lip-to-lip kiss can be sensual, implying mainly the idea that lust and love are the reasons for the kiss, reflecting the passionate kiss model. The compassionate kiss is defined by looking at the individuals participating in the kiss and their relationship to one another. Kisses between family and friends are most likely going to be different and have separate motivations than kisses between two lovers. The compassionate kiss model usually consists of a short kiss given to either the head or forehead. Kisses can be given between a person and non-human items including his/her pet, religious artifact, tokens, and the Earth. Kisses between people of higher social or economic ladders are also seen differently than those between members of one’s own class. A kiss to a person that is of higher class is usually out of respect and admiration whereas a kiss between two people of the same class out of respect is more rare, though not extinct. Usually kisses in the respect model are given to the fingers, hands or feet of the person receiving the kiss. The fourth type of kiss, the kiss of betrayal can be easily assimilated if we think of the idea behind the kiss of the seducer. A seducer uses his/her charm and beauty to entice their prey into obeying their wills and desires. The person being seduced may fall victim as a result of his/her lust or uncontrollable desire to please his seducer and gain physical rewards. Kisses of the betrayer are given to a wide array of the body, depending on the variance of the seduction. Kissing has a number of causes and motivations. When a person is asked to give an example of a kiss one usually dictates a scene from a romance movie or a vivid memory where two lovers embrace in passion, demonstrating their feelings through the kiss. Although kissing is largely attributed to romantic love there are many other motivations through which kisses are employed. A fit of lustful passion may warrant numerable kisses during sexual intercourse or a hot and steamy moment between two people. Someone who feels pathos, deep sympathy, towards another due to a mournful event may give a kiss of sorrow. An example of this would be a kiss to the widow at her late husband’s funeral to express their feeling of sympathy. Kisses can come from a need to be protective and caring. The perfect example of this kiss is when the mother kisses her child before his/her first day of school or before he/she goes off on a difficult trial or tribulation. A kiss can be given out of respect, wherein a worshiper kisses the hand of the Pope or a mafia man kisses the ring of his boss as portrayed in the well-known movie The Godfather. Someone who wishes to use another as merely a means to an end may give a kiss of betrayal. An example of this is a woman kissing a man to gain his trust and his love when she is really only interested in his monetary status. A kiss can be glorified out of joy or a welcoming. An example of this would be a person in a joyous state kissing someone because they need to display their happiness. A welcoming kiss isn’t as evident in American culture as it is in others, namely Italian and French where kisses on the cheeks are given as welcome signs of respect. There are many other reasons why kisses are given including, but not limited to, feelings of desire, exuberance, mockery, forgiveness, want, or during the process of leaving and saying goodbye, all of which will not be discussed in depth. A kiss can be lengthy, short, blown, given over and over again or in singularity and can be given under extreme emotion causing the kiss to be a ‘struggled kiss’, one where emotion is choking the individual (crying is usually involved) and the person kisses another without giving themselves fully to the kiss rather focusing on their emotions. As stated before, behind each type of kiss lies a motivation, some need or urge to initiate it. The following sections will now look at individual kisses and determine what psychological factors created each kiss as seen in American culture. However, in order to understand the reasons behind the kiss and its importance in relations as a sensual meaningful form of touch I must discuss the concept of touch as related to each type of kiss within the following sections. Kissing combines many human emotions and desires and is difficult to break into sections when studying it. However, I feel that this must be done if we are to gain any insight into the phenomenon that is the kiss. We will also look at kissing and its influence and appearance in several cultural factors, including kissing and homosexuality, kissing in the movies and the rejection of the kiss. We will start with the respect kiss and move through the different interrelated types of kissing. The means where affection of utmost respect is transferred are seen in culture usually through handshakes, pats, hugs and kisses. These forms of touch are used to express our admiration for another based on their accomplishments or other characteristics. However, it should be noted that the kiss is often seen as the most revered and coveted form of showing our respect. This respect, in turn, thus can be given not only to other persons but also to objects of affection. Examples of these objects include the ground, religious artifacts, and books or letters. Kissing of objects is just as much a form of respect of kissing another person, however the direction of the respect is often pointed directly to a non-physical being and only possibly indirectly to a physical being. Usually kissing of non-human objects is motivated by religious desires and beliefs. Kissing the ground after a rather shaky, turbulent flight or excursion at sea signifies our thanking someone (usually a deity of higher power) for our safe return. The kissing of religious artifacts, such as medallions, crosses and/or crucifixes signify a deep respect for our deity. Respect and expression of belief are both evident in the kissing of religious articles. Often times, this kissing is done while in prayer or meditation or when hoping for a desirable outcome. Kissing of letters or books (here I am mainly referring to letters where the acronym SWAK [Sealed With A Kiss] is seen) is an example of placing importance on the words enclosed. The meaning and importance of the letter requires the affection of the writer because it contains something of great importance either to the writer, viewer or both parties. However, the main concept when discussing kissing and its presence in the respect model, is seen in the interaction between humans. The concept of the kiss of respect goes back a long way, with “the … old Rabbis only recogniz[ing] three kinds of kisses, viz: those of greeting, farewell and respect. …[And the fact that] our forefathers had great sport with the kiss in … an etiquette book… saying, ‘… a kiss in honor given and taken before numerous witnesses is often an act of propriety.’” (Key, 56-57). It has been documented throughout history that the kiss is one of the most exemplary ways of conveying respect in social situations. It is still evident in today’s culture: when meeting a lady at a formal occasion it is proper for the male to place a kiss on her hand, reflecting his gratitude in their meeting. Kisses given at the beginning and end of conversations reflect each person’s respect and admiration for having a chance to talk and exchange thoughts or to make the acquaintance with that person. Kissing in an initial meeting between two persons of varying social status also reflects the respect kiss model. It has become customary in many cultures to kiss the cheeks of another when meeting them as a sign of respect and admiration for they are in a higher social caste and therefore are deserving of such respect. In America, although this is not as much the case, it is still very customary to exchanges kisses between an admirer and one who has accomplished something of value. The respect kiss model is one that is very clear on its motivation (a desire to illustrate one’s admiration or commitment for another) but also has a very wide variety concerning what and who is kissed. Culture and beliefs play a huge role in the respect kiss model and more often that not direct what type (ex: a long or short kiss) and to where the kiss will be placed. 
The compassionate kiss model is by far the most commonly seen kiss in American culture, even though it may not be the first type of kiss the everyday citizen will mention when asked to describe a kiss. The compassionate kiss also has the most clearly defined motivations of the four types of kisses mentioned. When we are discussing the compassionate kiss it becomes necessary to understand the idea of ‘tender, loving care’ (as conceived by Montagu) as a received and given emotion and the idea of mother-child compassion that is developed from birth. Our need to give and receive compassion comes from our childhood and the events surrounding it. As a child, we seek (and need) comfort, security, and physical closeness from our provider, our birth giver, our mother. This becomes true throughout our life. The mother, however, is merely substituted by our friends, family and own children and grandchildren. It is from the mother-child model that we can directly associate touching and the kiss with warmth and care. It is this touching and kisses that satiates a person when they require ‘tender, loving care’ while depressed and/or overcome with emotion. The mother-child model of which I speak of is the act of breastfeeding and the care a child receives when first born. The child is reassured through “the contact with and warmth of the mother’s body, the support in her … arms, the caressing it receives, and the suckling at her breast…. What better reassurance can there be than the support of its mother and the satisfaction of suckling at her breast…?” (Montagu, 68-69). The sucking in breastfeeding is the first, and if not the first by far the most important, touch involved in a child’s life. “What is established at the breastfeeding relationship constitutes the foundation for the development of all human social relationships…” (Montagu, 77-78). The importance here of breastfeeding is also complemented with other touching, “caressing, comforting, and bestowal of affection through kisses with the lips[. These] constitute experiences in which the infant is repeatedly conditioned” (Montagu, 107). The entirety of the mother-child experience is reflected later in life when the mother isn’t present. The importance of the security, care and warmth received as a child sets up the basis for compassion in the child’s mind for interactions later in life. The closeness, warmth, touch and kiss concept (that comes from the suckling of the nipples in breastfeeding) all are evident in kisses of compassion given and received later in one’s life. According to Montagu (page 216), “the individual who is awkward in his contact with others, is clumsy in his body relations with others, in shaking hands, in embracing, in kissing, in any and often all, of his tactile demonstrations of affection, is so principally because he has been failed in his interactive body-contact relations with his mother.” I believe that the physical closeness, the security and warmth the baby experiences while breastfeeding provides the basis for the compassionate kiss. In the action of breastfeeding, the baby’s mouth encompasses the nipple and through the sucking, the child receives the nourishment it needs, emotionally and physically. This concept is seen later in that child’s life. When they are in need of compassion, say for example at their father’s funeral, they receive the emotional support from their friends and family through closeness and the touching and kisses involved. When they become the giver of compassion often times I have observed that the kisses given are numerous and located on one section of the body. This is to imply that the warmth and compassion received while breastfeeding can also be transferred in times of emotional support. This “tactile stimulation appears to be a fundamentally necessary experience for the … individual” (Montagu, 216). 
Picture in your mind a kiss. There is no doubt that the vast majority of Americans see two lovers embracing each other and kissing each other romantically. This is the traditional vision of the passionate kiss model. The passionate kiss can be subdivided into having two separate, unique yet equally observed motivations. Passionate kissing is motivated by both the feelings of love and lust between the participants. There is a clear difference between each of these motivations. Love is inspired by emotion and the want to fill a hole that is purely psychological, one that is essentially the feelings of love between two lovers and their want to express love through physical means. Love is a strong emotion and an adequate motivator for passionate kissing. The kiss involved in love is the strongest form of touch between these two lovers and it invokes feelings of complete euphoria and ecstasy and the concept of two beings becoming one: (Rosetti’s “The Kiss” as taken from Montagu‘s Touching) “I was a child beneath her touch, -a man When breast-to-breast we clung, even I and she, - A spirit when her spirit looked through me, - A god when all our life-breath met to fan Our life-blood, till love’s emulous ardours ran, Fire within fire, desire in deity.” (Montagu, 81). Whereas love’s basis is physical pleasure through emotional desire and generosity, lust is purely physical. Passionate kissing when lust is the motivator is nothing more than our human desire to have our sexual arousal fulfilled, usually through sexual intercourse and the attainment of orgasm. Here, in lust’s case, the passionate kiss is merely a precursor to intercourse. Although passionate kissing used in foreplay is seen when both love and lust are the motivators, it is in situations of lust that the kiss is used merely as an end to our means (engaging intercourse and achieving orgasm) wherein love the kiss has a much more psychological meaning in addition to its purpose in foreplay. In passionate kissing where love is the motivator, the kiss is used to express and exchange the feelings and emotions between the two lovers. Love is itself a basic human necessity. Every human being needs to love and to be loved. The basis of love between two people is built upon many psychological factors that revolve around the concept of the friendship. It can be said then, that the friendship is the basis for love and thus the basis for the passionate kiss. Two lovers share a deep profound relationship marked by an unprecedented interconnectedness and strong, clear communication. “Friendship has been compared to a relationship between two souls, for it is in that relationship that we can experience deep spirituality” (Carotenuto, 112). With this exuberant foundation of friendship and its evolution into love developed comes the need to express and otherwise show each partner their love through physical actions - thus the emergence of passionate kissing. There are many ways of expressing this emotion: buying gifts, planning special events -i.e. dinners, movies- but the most effective and intense by far is through physical contact. The kiss that two lovers share is a show of their deep feelings for one another through a means that connects them physically, emotionally and spiritually. The same can be said of sexual intercourse between two lovers. I believe that both the acts of intercourse (as an intense touching experience) and that of kissing (as an equally, although not commonly thought of, intense touching experience) are closely paralleled. Both are physical actions based on the concept of touch and both fall under each of my four categories of kissing. However, kissing, unlike sex, is more commonly seen and the more accepted expression in our culture. When lust is the motivator behind the passionate kiss, we immediately relate it as a precursor to intercourse. Thus, as only a means to and end. Lust is a want, a desire of the skin for the purposes of attaining pleasurable sensations. This desire isn’t necessarily a bad thing. When it is combined with love, as described above, it forms a mature physical-emotional relationship. However, lust alone is purely the desire for, ultimately, sex. Here the passionate kiss acts as the initial step leading toward intercourse. Although the desire for sex and orgasm is strong in lust, acts of lust do not begin with immediate intercourse. As in all sexual activity, foreplay becomes a necessity. It is in such lustful engagements that we see the widest range of kisses over the length of the body. Here, kisses are given to the most sensitive and arousing areas of the body. Often times, these kisses are given to one’s ‘sweet spots’ and/or through oral sex. These ‘sweet spots’ may be located on the neck, ears, breasts, abdomen, and thighs. Oral sex is a type of kissing that focuses solely on one’s sexual arousal through direct stimulation of the genitals with the mouth. This type of lustful kiss has only one motivation: to create orgasm in a partner. Again, it should be noted that these types of kisses are also seen in love relationships but that the motivation in lust is purely physical fulfillment whereas in love psychological, emotion fulfillment is equally important (if not more so). With love, the passionate kiss is encased in Kernberg’s concept of ‘mature sexual love’ where “mature sexual love implies a commitment in the realms of sex, emotions, and values” (Kernberg, 16). Love is a unique motivation because it is not always present. Lust is always there in the form of the human libido. Kernberg makes note that libido is a drive (a constant motivator of human behavior) and instincts (in which love is considered an instinct) are sporadic and triggered by physiological factors (Kernberg, 17). Thus love is unique because it doesn’t happen all the time. Therefore, the implications of the passionate kiss when love is the motivator are much stronger and tied more to emotions than when lust is the motivator. Lust will always be present and a part of our culture; it is inherit that humans have a libido, a desire to propagate. Lust is activated as soon as humans reach puberty and the sexual organs begin functioning. Love takes time, commitment and emotional support to develop. In love, “the primary element … is the pleasure derived from the desire of the other, the love expressed in the other’s response to the sexual desire of the self, and the associated experience of fusion in ecstasy (Kernberg, 23). In this section I will discuss the act of kissing and its relationship to homosexuality as is seen in our (America’s) culture. Homosexuality in America is, regrettably (I say regrettably because it is a right given by the US Constitution and should be respected like every other right) looked down upon in our culture. There has been persistent discrimination against homosexuals, both male and female. The acts that homosexuals partake in (referring to kissing) are also looked down upon as inhuman acts. However, it should be noted that homosexuality has also been a key component in the publication of pornographic magazines such as Playboy. This is referring to the fact that female homosexuality is used often in entertainment to arouse and otherwise gain the attention of males. It is interesting to note that while Americans are overwhelmingly heterosexuals, that groups of them take positive interest to homosexuality and its acts. (Schur, 19; 115-116) Many Christian anti-homosexuals use the Bible as a means to support their opinion that homosexuality is wrong and should be looked down upon. However, “a mere twenty-eight verses in the Bible specifically condemn the city of Sodom or the sexual practices conventionally associated with it, even though only one verse alludes to what those acts might be” (Akeley, 3). That verse is Leviticus 20:13, “If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them shall be put to death for their abominable deed; they have forfeited their lives” (Student Bible for Catholics, 110). Thus we can equally say that because there is only one reference to homosexuality in the Bible, the scriptures are not a very reliable source for condemning its acts. The act of kissing in homosexuality is done for reasons similar to kissing in any other relationship. There aren’t separate means and desires; a homosexual desires touch, warmth and exchange of emotions as much as anybody else. This is not to say that they aren’t different in their sexuality. Homosexuals merely find that the establishment of those characteristics is more easily or more happily accomplished with partners of the same sex. Kissing still holds the same meanings as it does in a heterosexual relationship. The attention that homosexuals have grabbed from the public realm has become just another story for the public, one where they can display their uncertainty over another rising issue concerning sex in America (Schur, 16-17). The kiss of betrayal model is essentially the definition of betrayal with the medium of the betrayal the kiss itself. Betrayal is essentially the gaining of trust only to use it against that person, thereby using that person merely as an end to the betrayer’s own means. When introducing the kiss into betrayal, we stumble upon the situation known as seduction. In the book of Genesis in the Holy Bible and through various true accounts and through movies we have seen the dominant figure in seduction is more often than not the female. She uses her physical attractiveness to gain the trust of a male to ‘do her bidding’ as I’ve heard it so cleverly put. Often the seduced hasn’t experienced human touch recently or often and their need (and want) becomes so great that s/he disregards his/her own will and gives in to the seducer. It is a result of this human need for touch that s/he will accept the kiss (and thus the seduction) time and time again. The betrayer, or seducer, thus wields the power in the relationship because s/he knows that the other has now become dependant upon their physical closeness and touch and will do most anything to retain it. (Carotenuto) The kiss here is the all-important action because it is usually the kiss that becomes the ‘take it or leave it’ act. The person usually does not become completely seduced until s/he accepts the kiss from the seducer. It is important here that the one who is betrayed accept the kiss and that it is not forced upon them. The seducer will not have the same control over that person if they force the kiss upon the betrayed, whereas if they let the person accept their ‘kiss of death’. It is the physical attractiveness and therefore the want of the kiss that acts as the initial primer for the seducer (by primer I’m referring to the stepping stone or the branch they need to initiate a seduction) to gain control over the seduced. However, we must also look at betrayal in another light, as a fact of life. Without it, (again according to the Bible in Genesis) life, as we know it, would not be possible for the Christian world. If betrayal did not exist, man wouldn’t have defied God and eaten the forbidden fruit offered by Eve and indirectly the serpent. Humans have an inherit need for comfort, touch and condolence. Thus without it, man wouldn’t be where he is, outside of the Garden of Eden and a part of Earth. Even outside the Christian world, betrayal is a fact of life. “People come into the world, entering a condition of ontological exposure to the mortification of betrayal: the betrayal of life by death, betrayal through hate, betrayal of the primary unity through birth itself” (Carotenuto, 85). Thus we can conclude that betrayal is a necessary component in the life of humans. However, concerning the kiss of betrayal, it is almost certain that there is some evilness and desire to do wrong or injustice by the betrayer. Kissing initiates the emotional as well as the physical stimuli of the body. If the betrayer can commandeer these inner components, then s/he will have seduced that person into following his/her wishes and desires. It is with the issue of the kiss that we see the betrayer and seduction in such a horrible light, even though I have shown the usefulness and necessity of betrayal in general. The establishment of a physical bond (kiss) completely annihilates the respect and admiration that she has for another when s/he decides to use the gained trust to betray. It is in conclusion that I state that the kiss of betrayal, although an essential component of life, is indeed against many social, religious, and personal beliefs. The rejection of the kiss comes directly from the idea that one does not want to engage in any physical contact with others. This is primarily due to some childhood or traumatic experience that has conditioned them to avoid contact, either all together or contact that implies sexual wants and desires (such contact would include kissing). In the first case, (avoidance of contact all together) the reasoning usually comes from traumatic childhood experience(s). “Spanking and slapping [and hitting] with the open hand in order to punish children is still too often indulged. Inflicting pain upon them in this manner deprives children of the comfort the skin usually means to them; as a result, they may come to associate their own skin and that of others with fear of contact and pain, and thus may avoid skin contacts later in life.” (Montagu, 177) The second case where avoidance of sexual contact is the result may come from a traumatic experience such as a rape. Rape will most definitely create second thoughts and attitudes towards engaging in sexual acts, of which kissing is included. Either way, kissing is often avoided along with other forms of touching by the individual as a result of some experience(s). And the reintroduction of that person into conducting physical contact and experiencing the needs and wants associated with touch and kissing will be, to say the least, difficult if not impossible. The kiss has emerged to the forefront of displaying emotion, desire, and various other psychological and sociological wants and needs. Kissing itself is one of the most common forms of displaying emotion through touch because the lips and tongue are “areas of the body that are highly innervated… with cortical cells” (Heller, 38-39). Kisses in our culture have innumerable meanings and with each innumerable motivations. I have attempted, hopefully successfully, to describe and provide evidence of some of these. Most of what has been discussed has not been pursued in depth by any one scientist and has been scraped together from numerous psychologists and analysis that specialize in touching and human desires, both concepts directly related to kissing. Kissing is a unique action that has developed into an act that has taken on many meanings and that comes in many, many various types, shapes and sizes. Kissing can be summed up as an act, unlike any other, which dictates and demonstrates the emotions and desires of the kisser while fulfilling their need for physical contact. It is an action, unlike any other conducted by the human body. It incorporates the physical as well as the emotional and its wide variance of use to express internal feelings makes the kiss one of the best forms (although one of the most complicated to interpret) of human expression. A kiss is much more than just a kiss; it is not just one simple act. The importance of the kiss in human interaction outweighs any and all forms of interaction. 
Akeley, Jeffrey S. Christian Kissing for an Emotionally Constipated Nation. Bad Subjects: Political Education for Everyday Life, April 1995. Accessed Oct 19, 2002 from http://eserver.org/bs/20/akeley.html. Carotenuto, Aldo. To Love To Betray Life as Betrayal. Chiron Publications, Illinois. 1996. Dempsey, J.; Reichert, Tom. Portrayal of married sex in the movies. Sexuality and Culture. Vol. 4(3) Summer 2000, 21-36. Gibson, Valerie. The Joy of Kissing: A kiss is still a kiss… or is it?. Sun Media, August 21, 2002. Accessed Oct 12, 2002 from http://canoe.ca/lifewisesrval02/0821_val-sun.html Heller, Morton A. and Schiff, William. The Psychology of Touch. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates Publishers, New Jersey. 1991. Kernberg, Otto F. Love Relations: Normality and Pathology. Yale University Press, London. 1995. Key, Mary R., Paralanguage and Kinesics (non-verbal communication). The Scarecrow Press, Inc., New Jersey. 1975. Montagu, Ashley. Touching: The Human Significance of the Skin. Columbia University Press, New York. 1971. Schur, Edwin. The Americanization of Sex. Temple University Press, Philadelphia. 1988. Single Women in TV History: They’ve come a long way, baby, from the days when kissing was as far as the censors would allow a girl to go. People Weekly, June 1, 2001. Accessed on Oct 23, 2002 from http://web7.infotrac.galegroup.com/itw/infomark/658/319/24736743w7/purl=rc1_EAIM_0_A75710572&dyn=14!xrn_68_0_A75710572?sw_aep=viva_gmu Student Bible For Catholics. New American Bible. Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville. 1970. The History and Secret of the Kiss. Massey University Lecture Notes. Accessed Oct 19, 2002 from http://www.massey.ac.nz/~i75202/lecture5/docs/histkiss.htm. Email me at trev2713@hotmail.com |