First I would like to say that I too have had my share of the players online, and because of the games and lies that were told to me from so many men I decided one day that I was going to close out my account and get off the internet for good.

I was listed with many of the single sites online, and seeing as how I was going to close my account, I thought I had better go through all my email. I received an email from one of the single sites that was very down-to-earth sounding and for some reason I felt that this man that wrote the ad was being truthful. I answered him back saying: "I think your ad is great. I hope that you find that special someone". That was all to my reply.

It was taking me days to clean out my email and one day I noticed another email from this man, and of course I just had to read it. Well, needless to say, I didn't close out my account and instead I found a great friend online. With each passing day I found more emails from this man and then the day came that I received an IM from him (he was on a different server and had to download the AOL internet IM (AIM) ). We starting talking every night and each time we did, he gave me more and more info on his life, his address, his cell phone number, his home number, and his work number. I called all the numbers at one time or other to make sure this guy was for real. I promised myself that I would never fall for another guy online, but found that sometimes the heart is stronger then the mind and pretty soon I was looking forward to our talks on line and by phone.

I sent him cards and realize after I did that I had put my return address on them (I really didn't feel the need to worry, but still after the con jobs that have been done to me online I was starting to wonder if I did the right thing).

Well, days turned to weeks, weeks turned to months.

At Christmas time I received a box in the mail with no return address. In the box was a stuffed animal, two games (for my sons) and a beautiful necklace, and there was a card enclosed just saying "a little something for your boys and you". I was dumbfounded. I couldn't think who would send me something. Then I noticed the postmark and it was from my friend online. These simple little gifts meant so much to me because that year I was having a very hard time, very little money, and it was the first Christmas without my daughter (she passed away in Jan of that year at a young age).

After another month talking, etc. we decided that we needed to meet,  and with that he bought my airline ticket, paid for a hotel room for me to stay in, etc. I passed all this info to my very good friend in case, God forbid, something should happen to me, and off I went. The meeting went great and to make this story a little shorter, it has been over 3 years that we met online and I am happy to say that we have been married for 2 years.

So there are a few good people out there, there is a rainbow and a light at the end of the tunnel.



ENTRY FROM OUR GUESTBOOK:
I was in love with my online dream man. He lives in Massachusettes, is very wealthy, loves romance, makes lovely promises, but he loves his TOYS, of which I found out I was one. Later I found out he was coming online under different names so I wouldn't know he was online. Even knowing all the above, it was hard to leave him. He now wants to be a "friend" only. It isn't possible.

Lessons learned online are hard, but if taken as a teaching tool, can be lived with. God bless all my sisters out there. There are good men online. And lucky for me, I finally met one. We are looking for a retirement community to settle in. I have never been happier. There IS happiness after a broken heart.

Well, I'll briefly start with my entire story [ the beginning will be the Readers Digest version LOL ]. My first husband was murdered in a car-jacking attempt in '84. My second husband [who was also my high school sweetheart] turned out to be an abusive drunk and we divorced after 10 years of marriage. I dated men who broke my heart and when the last one did it, I decided that I did not wish to date anyone "locally". At the same time, I signed onto AOL.

Within 2 weeks I met someone whom I really liked a lot. Things were great except for the distance between us. Funny how I didn't want to date anyone local but I just couldn't stand the 800 mile distance. After finding out that he was actually married but separated <not divorced like he had said>, I just couldn't get over the lie and was unhappy in the relationship so I ended it.

BUT, at the same time I had met this other guy I also became friends with and I repeat "FRIENDS". We talked online, via IM's, and we never exchanged phone numbers until one night I was so distraught finding out the man I was seeing from AOL was married, my friend gave me his phone number and never asked for mine in return.

Knowing how Caller ID works, I blocked my name and number before I called him "just in case" he had Caller ID. He let me vent every frustration I had built up inside of me. Never once did he ask me to call him again. Never once did he ask me to meet him. Never once did he ask for my phone number. I had found a true friend.

Last September, I ended the relationship with the man who had told me the lie and agreed to meet my friend in Atlantic City. What better and safer place to meet someone than at an AOL Bash ... where over 100 people were in the same room as we were. LOL

Since the Bash we have been together every weekend, which often starts on Thursday night and ends on Monday morning. He lives 2 hours away from me and we are up front and honest with each other. I know he's divorced ... I was in court when the decree was entered [color me cautious LOL].

We are planning to marry within the next year and be one family living in one home instead of two. I am happier than I've ever been and in less than 3 weeks we will be celebrating one year of happiness and love. He has turned out to be my best friend. :)

Please listen to me though, I know there are people online who are sick and twisted. I did a lot of research finding out who my fiance was ... and I told him I was checking him out and he didn't seem to mind at all. Everything he told me turned out to be true, so the trust has been established along with the love. But the most important thing is: I've been online for 3 years, almost the same time as my fiance, and I spoke to him for 2 years before we ever agreed to meet each other. Plus, I met him for the first time, and the second time come to think of it, in very public places. But remember ... I was CAUTIOUS ... and guarding my heart.

Two years ago I was tired of meeting losers online...tired of talking to men in other states who promise, lie, and cheat and...well, was just tired. I had my share of"Losers on Line"!  Trust me, I also was very lonely and dumb in the ways of online relationships ... and learned the hard way.

I am not sure if ALL of them are liars but most men who get into relationships with women in different states are usually either married or in a relationship. They get you to fall for them online, woo you and coo you, and figuratively screw you.

I thought it was going to be just me forever...until one day I thought to myself, hmmm, I wonder if I did a search in the member directory for someone in my area, in my age group, UNmarried, and see what turned up. And wala!, there was someone there...online even.

I IM'd "Hello" and, being a bit nervous, then told him, "Sorry to have bothered you. I think I made a mistake." However he continued to talk to me. We seemed to hit it off very well and continued talking for a few months and exchanged photos. He lived 9 miles away from me, was single/never married, didn't lie. Too good to be true?

Perhaps it was, I thought. Finally we talked on the phone for a while and decided ok, let's meet for lunch. The next day he picked me up. I thought he was delightful but wasn't sure how he felt about me. We had a full day of running around and talking...lots of talking which is something amazing to me from a man. Then he took me home and that's where it happened ~ when he kissed me good-bye, I melted ~ completely ~ and the rest is history.

We got engaged a year later, married 6 months after that. I am very blessed and it's wonderful to know that AOL is where I met my love of my life...and there are "happily ever afters" after all.

I know you can meet someone online and get to know them inside before you meet them outside, and you can develop a close bond even if there's miles and miles of distance between you ... sometimes people actually fall in love without meeting. However, I don't recommend it.

Time seems to work in a trusting relationship. I do know actually meeting someone in your hometown is a smart idea...like I did. I guess I got lucky; he was my dream come true ~ almost too good to be true. I love to tell my story of how I met my Mr. Wonderful on AOL; however, I have to add that he was heavensent and that I had decided to never meet anyone online again when I found him.

Good luck to everyone who wants what I have. There are good men out there, and I sincerely hope all of you deserving gals find your Mr. Wonderful, too.

I've been online since 1992 and have a time or two been swept up by the sweet-talk of a man online and had my heart stomped on a few times. Nothing as bad as some of the stories I've read in your former newsletter, so I consider myself lucky to have gotten away relatively unharmed. But I've also made some great friends online and, for the last year have been dating a wonderful man that I met through Love at AOL. We spent many months emailing and chatting online before I agreed to meet, and I took all the precautions of meeting in a public place and not giving out my address or phone number until I was comfortable with him. We've been together over a year now and it's going great. We have to be careful ...

but it is possible to find love online!

I'd like to share my story with your readers. I too was devastated by a man I met online, but then I met a wonderful man online. He now reaps the benefits for being a better man than the one I was fooled by here online. As a result I appreciate him more, and I take those dull days that a couple gets from time to time with a smile now ... a smile of contentment. My story....

I was happily single at the time -- living in Boston with an exceptionally good job which I liked very much. I was raising my children alone with the love and support of family surrounding me in all directions. All was happy and well in my little world.

I met a couple of people online back then whom I trusted as I was a real newbie. I met this particular man through a female online friend. I figured he was 'with' her online when she introduced us. But knowing her as I did and as I read all he wrote in the chat room, I knew right off he would be a bore to her. He was so kind, so intelligent, so REAL ... not the usual flirty man she prefers.

Time went on, and he and I swapped email ... AFTER I asked her if she was interested in him! Of course she had no interest -- this man was tooooo REAL for her flirting ways.

He and I slowly (I repeat SLOWLY) got to know each other -- first in email, and online chat, then on the telephone, and sending greeting cards back and forth. He also flattered me by sending me a bottle of his favorite wine to share with me. There I was in Boston - there he was 3,000 miles away -- on the west coast. The chance of us ending up together was so slim. I wasn't moving -- neither was he. He had 3 kids and a business there.

Well, time passes and people change their minds. He came to meet me in Boston ... I do believe we should all meet EQUALLY to make it all fair 50/50. So he paid for his trip to Boston and I happily decided to supply the hotel room (filled with flowers & balloons).

We met on equal terms; no one felt obligated. The best way to meet!

We hit it off, and our next meeting, two months later, found me (with my son) on the west coast visiting him.

We knew we were destined to be together. We were so loving, so romantic and so sexual online when we shared our one-on-one time. We loved each other, wanted each other so much ~ we knew we needed to be together daily.

He graciously decided to give his business up, left his kids behind (all are full grown), and move to the east coast to be with me. I had previous family obligations I couldn't walk away from and he accepted that.

We've been together now over 4 years. He's still that dear sweet man who works so hard to pay all our bills, who never signs online anymore, who loves me dearly. I am very blessed to have met this man here on AOL years ago -- strictly by accident -- totally unplanned.

BUT, what happened for us is not for everyone. Meeting people here is the same as meeting in a barroom, or a church or any outing. Nothing 'magical' exists here. It's just another form of introduction -- not a better form.

NO relationship is perfect regardless of where you meet either. My sweet man is still with me -- still so in love with me but I've come to learn once he was offline he hasn't one romantic bone in his sweet body. He's wonderful in every other way. I guess what I'm trying to say, ladies (and gentlemen), is be careful what you wish for. NO ONE is 'perfect' regardless of where you meet them. For every good point people have, there are faults too. Let's all tread carefully, keep our eyes and our hearts open but always remain realistic.

Hi. After meeting a couple of men online, which I must say that are still friends, I met the love of my life. We chatted online for a few months and also on the telephone. Then came the day we met in person. It was wonderful.

That has been almost a year ago and we have been together ever since. We are getting married in Dec. I have the internet to thank for meeting this man.

There are some bad ones out there that like to play head games, you just have to be careful of whom you are talking with. Watch for all the warning signals. There were a few that I talked to that I wouldn't meet cause I had bad vibes about. But I must say that the Lord was with me on this one.

So don't give up, just be careful.

When I joined your former newsletter, I was doing it to help someone else, and from the stories that are submitted, I have been able to offer help to others who might ask me about online meetings. My hubby and I met online 3 years ago and have now been married very happily for 2 years. I agree with others; not all are as fortunate to meet their soulmate online.

After being through prior marriages, my husband and I had almost given up on finding THE ONE that made our life complete. It can and does happen, but everyone should be very careful in their search. Hearts do mend (mentioned before by others.)

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