RH: Richard Head here folks... and today we've got with us a prime example of a PXW team player... and he's got to be, cuz he's running the place! Today we have the PXW Commissioner!
Commish: How ya doin' Rich?
RH: Not bad, not bad... how about you 'Mish?
Commish: Ehh...been better...just fighting a damn cold right now...but hoping to get some pXw action going soon...nobody really wants to commit to their contracts...with the exception of a few.
RH: Yes... well we'll get to that later, but first off, we all know you as "the Commissioner"... do you have a real name?
Commish: It's Michael P. Knickerbocker…
RH: Oh wow... after all these years... and nobody knew your name... they all had me up to this, and I'm glad I got it outta ya!
Commish: That’s my birth name anyway.
RH: Why, is your name changed now?
Commish: My name I go by now is Joe Syko.
RH: Oh.... you're the Joe Syko I have heard so much about?
Commish: Well, yes I am… you tell me...would you want your last name to be Knickerbocker?
RH: Well no.... Commissioner Syko. Wow, that has a ring to it!
Commish: Yeah, I think so too.
RH: Being Psycho Xtreme Wrestling, why not add another 'Psycho'… ok, so Commish... you started the PXW around 4 years ago... well actually Psycohol and Psykadelik did... but you were soon appointed the Commish... how did this come about?
Commish: I met Psykadelik and Psycohol about a year before the whole thing started...we we're at an a "WWF" event in Binghamton, NY...they were two aspiring kids just wanting to get their feet wet and I was a man with a vision.
RH: so you helped get their dream afloat?
Commish: We had dinner after the event and decided that if we can't make it to the main stage, why not create our own.
RH: I see… and Why Mr. Syko did you decide on Commissioning instead of Wrestling?
Commish: Well, I actually did some independent circuit wrestling when I was 18...went for a hurricanrana which was supposed to be countered into a powerbomb and ended up landing on my neck.
RH: Ouch! Sounds like excrutiating pain... so that was the career ender?
Commish: Yeah, I haven't quite gotten over the traumatic event, but I wouldn't say ender.
RH: Well yah, the random Mr. Splooge match to be thrown in there, since he poses little threat to your neck or anything.
Commish: That's JUST THE BEGINNING!
Commish stands up and begins to laugh with a very evil tone
Commish: MUAHAHAHAA!!!
RH: Well folks, that could be news right there... now what kind of duties do you uphold and perform as a Commissioner?
Commish: I put together shows, matches and make sure that my performers don't get out of hand.
RH: Sounds like a big job, knowing that trouble is abound with this cast of characters…
Commish: Well, they are characters ha ha...but without them, there wouldn't be pXw. I like to make everyone happy and let them live their dream from which McMahon would never give the chance.
RH: Well Mr. McMahon is missing out on the World's Greatest Show! So are you proud of how far the PXW has came over the years?
Commish: Definitely...we've made progress from show 1...things could get better with the right motivation behind our guys.
RH: Was it all worth it?
Commish: It’s always worth it! We're doing what we want to do and doing something we love.
RH: That is true sir... and working for you has been great fun! And I hope I can continue working for you for years to come…
Commish: Wait...who hired you anyway?
RH: What? I thought you did sir?
Commish: Ummm...oh yeah...that's right…
RH: I've been getting paychecks... see... simple mistake... ha ha ha…
Commish: Paychecks??? I'll have to talk to Payroll in the morning.
RH: About what?
Commish: Oh nothing. your job
RH: Ok... well back to the interview...
Commish: Hahahaha!
RH: Are you laughing at me sir? Anyway, there have been many great moments over the past 4 years in he PXW... can you give us a couple of your favorites?
Commish: Oh sure...of course it would be the inaugural show. That's one of them....but I think just the overall product makes me happy.
RH: Well that's superfluous sir... great moment! Great moment!
Commish: What did you just say?
RH: I said that was superfluous!
Commish: What the hell does that mean?!
RH: It means wonderful, sir...
Commish: That's just horrible Mark... horrible…
RH: Mark? My name is Richard sir...
Commish: Oh...same difference.
RH: Ok... so onto more pressing matters...
Commish: Yes, please…
RH: The EWA... what do you think of it?
Commish: Well, they have heart. They want the same thing that the guys here want. I just think that Psycohol needs to understand where he started. Him tarnishing the name of the belt there was a shot in the heart. But I understand that all he wants to do is wrestle. I don't want to ruin it like Vince did by trying to combine 2 Feds...it doesn't work.
RH: Well that sounds like respect... but I remember in past talks with you, you seemed to show a lot of spite towards them... a lot of putting down their talent and such... what happened to that? Saying they couldn't hang with the PXW boys…
Commish: Hey, it's different when you're on camera. I want to send a message and make sure they don't forget that we're here. I wanna GRAB their attention!!!
RH: I see, so the hatred you portray on camera is not a complete hatred... just competition maybe?
Commish: I believe competition would be a good way to put it. I have plenty of respect for what they do. But their brand is different than ours. I produce and all out Hardcore atmosphere. I don't know if some of their talent can keep pace.
RH: Personally, I think they surpass you guys in many fields... they have shown more consistency over the years, and putting it in competition... I think they simply destroy y... oh sh*t! I just lost my job didn't I?
Commish: I'll give you 20 seconds to rephrase that....
RH: Ok ok.... lemme think, lemme think... so what I meant to say is... that like you guys are going almost neck and neck in the ratings... but it looks like PXW may be taking the lead, because of it's superior roster! Is that better?
Commish: Yes...I can't help that my wrestlers have separate agendas...we have a certain few dedicated guys and then guys who just don't have the love for it. That's beyond my control.
RH: Yes, very true... and as you say, many of them travel overseas to Japan often? There is some great wrestling competition over there, so I do understand that...
Commish: Yes, I know Psykadelik does very often. But he's usually there when we schedule a show.
RH: Yes, he has been in attendance at every PXW show so far I believe… a true team player!
Commish: Yes, he his. Him and Psycohol.
RH: Yes Psyco is definitely, but speaking of Team Players and Psycohol, what do you think of Psycohol himself, and Mr. Execution and Splooge... 3 of your homegrown talents all venturing over to the EWA and making huge names for themselves?
Commish: Well, I'm happy for them. I’m glad that they keep in shape between shows.
RH: Do you feel betrayed by any of them? Especially Psycohol?
Commish: Like I stated before though...what Psycohol did with the pXw belt and incorporating it into EWA was a shot in the heart.
RH: Yes, he defended your Title without consent from you... and even let other guys not associated with the PXW hold it at times... How did that make you feel?
Commish: Yes he did Blake. And I still feel betrayed for that reason.
RH: That's Rich, Joe…
Commish: Yeah, right...sorry. But I was hurt by that whole ordeal. But things happen and I'll get past it.
RH: Well at least you've got the Title back now... where it belongs...
Commish: That's right. And I do have huge plans for our next few shows and what is going to transpire with the belt.
RH: It's around Psykadelik's waist at the moment... and you've declared that Psycohol will never get a shot at it again?
Commish: I just feel that Psycohol is sometimes conflicted. OH, he'll get a shot at it. Just not in a single's match. But I'm not getting into that at this time.
RH: Oh so he does have a possibility in the future for that Title...
Commish: Yes, a very slim possibility.
RH: That's some news there folks...
Commish: Why do you keep saying that? And who are you talking to?
RH: The people listening Commish...
Commish: There's nobody else here.
RH: Well, those who read this... they are my folks sir...
Commish: Ahhh...ok...you were beginning to freak me out.
RH: Well you've never brought this up before.
Commish: Oh, just like your boys Kevin Kelly and Michael Cole?
RH: Yes... you don't believe me?
Commish: ya fruit
RH: Hey! Now don't tell me you believe that rumor!
Commish: Oh trust me, I believe you. Commish rolls his eyes
RH: Man, you are a nefarious one.... now let's skip to something else... something ver...
Commish: What??? What did you just call me??
RH: What do you mean what? I called you... hilarious...?
Commish: Ohhh...I am pretty funny aren't I?
RH: Yah, you're regular comedian!
Commish: Got a joke for ya...
RH: Oh tell me please... I love jokes...
Commish: What do guys say to Michael Jackson when they're on the beach?
RH: Oh, I like that Michael Jackson guy..... what?
Commish: HEY! Get out of my 'son!!’
RH: Oh... ummmm.... ha ha... personally sir, I think that was over the line and not even the slightest bit funny... Don't diss the King of Pop like that ever again! I don't want to take it out on you! Punishment I mean, by "taking out"…
Commish: LAUGH DAMN YOU LAUGH!!!! commishes face turns beat red
RH: I will not laugh...
Commish: YOU SON OF A B*TCH!!! I'M JOE SYKO DAMN IT!!!
RH: Hey calm down man! Take a chill pill man!
Commish: I'M YOUR BOSS!!!! Commish stands up and raises his hand!!!
RH: Calm down you wily savage! You beast! You brute!
Commish: Either you laugh or this interview is over and so is your life in the pXw!
RH: Ok, will this make you happy?
Head gets up and does an Irish Jig
Commish: HA HA HA HA! Now that's what I'm talking about. fruitcake
RH: Ok good sir... now onto the Interview...
Head sits back down… Commish eases into his chair
RH: So something notorious with the PXW is it's general lack of activity, which I believe you have brushed on a bit here tonight... in the beginning it was week after week, every show was... now it seems to only be a couple shows a year... why is this, and can't we change it?
Commish: Yes, we do have a lack of consistency. I do try to keep my sanity...it's tough trying to organize a show when I don't have confidence in my talent even showing up.
RH: I know… many disappointments lately when it comes to planned shows...
Commish: Yes, I do want to get at least a couple shows in soon.
RH: You promised us a Christmas Show this year... obviously that didn't happen…
Commish: Well, we did get together for one, but an unnamed few precariously showed up mysteriously right at sundown.
RH: Yes, I remember that... and since then, I believe there were a few possible shows to happen that never got off the ground...
Commish: Yup. There's a couple guys who worry about gettin’ dirty and wet. Guess they haven't heard of this invention we call a shower.
RH: And sir, I am so disappointed... I wanted a Snow Show this year, since PXW rocks those like no other...
Commish: I know. Hell in the Snow was one of our greatest shows.
RH: And truthfully I do not know if I can trust your word anymore...
Commish: I GUARANTEE you that we will get a show or 2 off in the next few months.
RH: Well, I'm not even sure I have faith in that now... I have completely lost my faith in Christ after the Christmas Show didn't happen... I mean, it pains me so...
Commish: Sounds like you need counseling brother.
RH: Oh... don't worry about me...
Commish: Trust me, I won't.
RH: But really do you still find it realistic that we have 4 more shows in this year to beat Wrestlemania to 20? I really have my doubts...
Commish: Unfortunately, I don't think that's possible. My goal right now is just to get things started again.
RH: Oh man! The prophecies are true! We're finished!!! Help me Odin!!! PLEEEASE!!!! Oh ummm.... sorry...
Commish: Wow…
RH: I'll gather myself...
Commish: Yes, please do. freak
RH: Umm, just ignore that please...
Commish: Riiight…………
Richard begins openly weeping, and falls to the Commishes chest for comfort.
Commish: WHAT?!?! GET OFF OF ME!!!! Why are you trying to take my pants off??!?!!!?!?
RH: Oh *sniffle*sniffle* sorry sir. I... I wasn't doing that... my hand slipped.
Commish starts to bludgeon Rich with his elbow!
RH: Ouch!
Rich leaps backwards back into his seat.
Commish: Get back to the damn interview!!
RH: Ok ok ok… I'm good I'm good, I'm fine… SO back to the Interview... well it was rumored that the big Pykadelik vs. Psicon showdown was to happen at one of these last shows that never happened... but also a rumor has popped up that Psicon is moving away from the area after college in only a couple months... will this match ever happen? I was looking forward to it very much…
Commish: IT WILL HAPPEN!! IT HAS TO HAPPEN!! It’s my main priority at this time to get that match together.
RH: I know, it has to! But if he moves before a PXW Show takes place?
Commish: We'll have a show before he moves.
RH: I hope you can do this Commish... I believe it's just the match the PXW needs to get back on the tracks.
Commish: Oh, you won't believe what I have in store for the pXw!
RH: Well hope it all happens, I will be in the first row, you know it!
Commish: Oh..yeah, right....you sure will champ. How am I going to tell him????
RH: But onto one last topic that is really a sizzling topic if you know what I mean...
Commish: Right...
RH: We all just want to know... are you the Commissioner, and Psykadelik.... one and the same?
Commish: Hahahahahaha.... no. I don't even see the similarity between us at all. There's no connection whatsoever.
RH: Is Michael Knickerbocker also Psykadelik's real name?
Commish: No...I know Psyk's real name.
RH: I mean the proof seems almost overwhelming... at least over the last few shows...
Commish: Rich! GET OUT OF MY FACE!!!
RH: You have been seen wearing his clothes, him wearing yours... you're never seen on the camera together... Hey, I'm just bringin' the facts to the folks!
Commish: I...I mean, no, we're not the same person.
RH: In fact, that seems to be Psykadelik's trademark vest hanging out from the bottom of your shirt right now!
Rick points to the obvious brown fabric hanging from the Commish's shirt.
Commish: No...this vest is available everywhere where pXw merchandise is sold…
RH: Well I haven't seen it yet...
Commish: Cuz it has yet to hit the market, RICH!!!
RH: You just get dibs on it before it's out, because you're the Commish right?
Commish: Yes, that's.....correct.
RH: I see, I see...
Commish: Good thinking Rich…
RH: So you actually think that those silly goggl... I mean wicked cool goggles will hide your true identity like it did for Clark Kent? This is the real world Syko...
Commish: LISTEN!!! ARE WE THROUGH HERE?!?!
RH: Oh ummm... sure thing…
Commish begins to stand up and leave...
RH: No no, come back! We've still got the short answer part to go…
Commish turns and looks...
Commish: Ok ok…
RH: C'mon sir.
Commish sits back down…
Commish: Shoot.
RH: Ok, thank you sir. You'll never regret it.
Commish: You will.
RH: So for the short answer part... What would you call PXW's best match ever?
Commish: Psykadelik/Psycohol 2.
RH: Ahhh good choice sir... now who would you call your favorite PXW Wrestler? Who do ya cheer for the most out there?
Commish: I personally enjoy watching The Janitor. He's just hilarious.
RH: Oh... you sure it's not Psykadelik sir?
Commish: NO!!!! DAMN YOU!!!
RH: You seem to always be in heavy favor of him...
Commish: LISTEN!
RH: Always giving him the Title shots and such...
Commish: They're all great....ok? Next question!
RH: Ok... but there's got to be one... one that is your least favorite! Who would that be?
Commish: The Blob… he almost killed Psicon
RH: Damn! I had a bet with Michael Cole that you'd say Psycohol!
Commish: Ohh...a bet for who would be the submissive one?
RH: No, for that you'd hate Psycohol the most! Now I'm gonna lose half my next year's salary because of you!
Commish: if you even see next years salary
RH: What was that Commish?
Commish: Oh, you heard that too??
RH: Something about if I'd ever see something...
Commish: Must have been the floor creaking.
RH: Oh, yes, probably it...
Commish: Yeah...haha what an ass!
RH: So who woul... an ass sir? Who's got an ass?
Commish: Whooooo! Yes, we all have them!
RH: Oh ok… so next question...
Commish: Right...
RH: Who would you call the funniest wrestler here in the PXW? Because we sure have got a lot of them! Uh hyuck uh hyuck!
Commish: The funniest would have to be Mr. Splooge. His antics are just out of this world. Oh...and nice laugh…
RH: Thanks, I got that from Goofy... wanna hear another Goofy impersonation?
Commish: NO! Please, let's finish the interview.
RH: at the top of his lungs Rich yells YAAAAAHOOHOOHOOWHOOOEYY!!!!
Commish: My god...small minded individuals.
RH: Sorry, couldn't help myself. Blushing
Commish: RICH!!! SIT DOWN!!!
RH: Ok... was just... Ahhem ok lets go. How about a favorite Show?
Commish: My favorite show would have to be Hell in the Snow!
RH: A common favorite among many of us sir… that’s why I was hurt this year to see that the snowiest winter we've has in 10 years went to waste…
Commish: Yes, me too.
RH: Woulda been so much fun. Ok, now let's move into the home stretch.... name association...
Commish: Ok...
RH: I say a name you make a quick-witted intelligent response...
Commish: Ok, cool...
RH: Whew, he didn't make fun of me for proper English that time So here we go... Psykadelik.
Commish: Amazing.
RH: Ha! I knew it!!! You are him aren't you!
Commish: What??
RH: I just nailed the tail on the donkey!!! You wouldn't have said amazing if you weren't him!
Commish: Do you not think that he is an amazing performer?
RH: Well yes he is... but that's beside the point...
Commish: No...no it’s not… ok.... then he's RUTHLESS!!!!
RH: Oh... ok... I'll stop with this then...
Commish: Next name!!
RH: Ok, Psycohol.
Commish: Intense.
RH: So am I sir... ask Kevin Kelly about it...
Commish: I'm sure you are Rich...I'm sure you are.
RH: If you want to see intensity, invite me over some night!
Commish: Umm...no, that's ok...I play for the other team… I live on the other side of the tracks
RH: Oh... I see.
Commish: I'm what you would call a Heterosexual.
RH: Oh wait... you're not implying that I'm....
Commish: Well, isn't that what you were getting at?
RH: Hey! I'm not Gay! No... hahahaha... you thought I was.... hahahahaha silly!
Commish: Silly? Oh...then what did you mean?
RH: No, no no, no.... no. Ummm... what I meant was... hey my time's running short...
Commish: Ok...
RH: I gotta get going soon, so on with the names... Lumberjack.
Commish: SCARY STRENGTH!
RH: Yes... or do you mean HAIRY STRENGTH?
Commish: Umm...riiiight…… good one.
RH: What? That wasn't funny?
Commish: Ehhhhhh...no.
RH: I thought that was extremely well-placed.
Commish: Well, it wasn't…
RH: Man, a dry sense of humor you have sir… ok, how about Psicon?
Commish: Underachieved… he could be so much better. He's gotta show that aggression when he performs.
RH: Yes true... but personally after that beating from him I took, he gives me the willies! Man I wish I could give him the willie.......s.
Commish: Wait? What?
RH: What?
Commish: Nevermind... just keep going..
RH: Ok... how about Psycometer…
Commish: Mysterious.
RH: Ooooh yeah!
Commish: When will we find out what he's really about?
RH: I wish I could tell you! You think he will ever return? I hear he has an image to retain, and this wrestling gig kinda hurts it?
Commish: I guess he's too worried about what other's who will never know or see him doing this will think…
RH: In persona, I sure would have never guessed he'd care about image... but hey, who am I to judge... I just hope to see him again! How about good ol' Mr. Splooge...?
Commish: Out of this world…
RH: I know you love to pick on him.
Commish: Yah… not really sure what he thinks he's accomplishing, but I love having him around.
RH: Me too... once Ninja let me in to double team on Splooge... man that was some good stuff... Splooge didn't like it at all! Hahahaha! Like Tag Team Wrestling you know?
Commish: Riiiight……. I bet you like having a tag team huh?
RH: Yah, we kicked his butt!
Commish: 2 on 1…
RH: Yah, Handicap Match. It's never fun being the 1... ya gotta be on the team, trust me… oh wait, hrrrm...
Commish: Yeah, I figured.
RH: Hrrrrm hrrrrm hrrrrm.... whoooooooooooooo!!!! Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!! Sorry... something caught in my throat…
Commish: Wonder what that would be…
RH: Ok, how about Mr. Execution...
Commish: Rising to the top… slowly but surely.
RH: I like how you worded that one...
Commish: I bet you did.
RH: But I think he's a faster riser than you think... I can tell..
Commish: fag Oh jeez…
RH: What was that?
Commish: Could you BE any more gay? dear lord
RH: Wait... does everything I say sound Gay you’re saying?
Commish: You keep giving off these gay innuendoes…
RH: Oh God, I'm doing it again!
Commish: Doing what again?
RH: Oh... you know... just making these Gay innuendoes... I go into a splurge of them once in awhile… I have been trying to suppress it...
Commish: I'm starting to get uncomfortable. Can we just please finish here?
Commish keeps moving in his chair and looking toward the exit…
RH: Oh ok... I see that... couple more… PsychoRuff.
Commish: Not enough drive. He has the talent, but just doesn't have the dedication.
RH: Yes, girl problems... that's why I don't favor gir... I mean they always drag you down... happens to the best of us…
Commish: Right.
RH: How about Blob?
Commish: BANNED!!!
RH: Haha!
Commish: He will never step foot into the pXw AGAIN!
RH: Good! Wolfman X.
Commish: Well...X is a big boy… something we could use here.
RH: Yes, he did make one PXW Show if I remember correctly…
Commish: Yes he did, and I was impressed with his power and athleticism.
RH: Definitely!
Commish: …and his educated feet.
RH: No doubt... Well stick a fork in me, I'm done! It sure was nice having you here Psykadelik...
Commish: Sure…… WHAT?!?!
RH: What?
Commish: What did you just call me??!!
RH: Oh, I mean Commissioner Joe Syko! Seriously that's what I said!
Commish: Yes...well thank you for having me Steve.
RH: Yea... Steve? Ahhh heck... you don't even know me after all these years?
Commish: C'mon....whew....I’m just messin’ with ya Mark… I mean RICH! Ha ha....I’m a jokester!
RH: Yes you are... a good one. Well anyways, I hope the PXW can somehow get those 4 more shows in before Wrestlemania 20, even if you are doubtful...
Commish: I would love to see it, but I can't guarantee it.
RH: And try to get a show for us soon, that Psykadelik/Psicon match would be great.
Commish: Yes, I agree.
RH: So it was nice having you, and stop by again... anytime... I'm here nights and weekends...
Commish: Well...just get in touch with my secretary. And stop calling my house at 2am and panting into the phone! I'm getting tired of it.
RH: Oh... you knew that was me? Ha... just joking! Ahhhh all in good fun...
Commish: you said..."This is Rich" and then started to pant…
RH: Damn, now who am I gonna hafta move on too?! Maybe Natas... oh, musta slipped that night... all a joke, all a joke…
Commish: Right....well don't do it anymore.
RH: No problem… so as we sign off... we'd just like to remind you of Brisco's and Jojo's! Tell 'em Jojo!
Commish: Wait...we don't have our masks… you're blowing our cover damn you!
RH: But... just wanted to get a cheap promotion in
Commish: yeah...I know
RH: I meant... tell 'em about Brisco's and Jojo's Commish...
Commish: Well, they're a great toy store offering...BEARS, RABBITS, HANGING MONKEYS, BULLDOGS, MICE...YOU WANT IT WE GOT IT!!! THAT'S 555-7525!!!! CALL NOW!!!
RH: NOW!
Commish: sh*t! went crazy there.
RH: WHILE OUR.... THEIR SUPPLIES LAST!
Commish: STOP IN AND SEE US.....I MEAN....ER....THEM!
RH: YAH... PURPLE MONKEYS, GREEN BEARS, FABULOUS DOLLS AND GIRAFFES
Commish: RICH!!!
RH: Oh... ok.
Commish: Stop.
RH: Sorry.
Commish: Anyway...
RH: Yes, anyways, this is over, catch ya later Joe Syko!
Commish: Ok Rich...take care.
RH: Yes, au revoir!
Commish gets up and walks out...