Grace stood in the shower for an extended period of time that morning, let the warm water loosen up her muscles as her mind worked overtime. She knew it was time that Chris know about her past, but she was still scared of how he would react and there was still two more days until she went back home and she didn’t want two days of awkwardness.

As Grace towel dried her hair there was a knock on her door. ’Oh goodness,’ She thought, thinking as soon as she opened the door she would see his face, but thankfully she was wrong.

As Grace pulled back the door it revealed Cait’s smiling face. “Good morning!” She said cheerily.

“Hey, morning to you too, I thought you were Chris at first,” She told her with a look of dread on her face.

“I thought that would be a good thing for you,” She said.

“No, he poured his heart and soul out to me last night and what did I do? Rejected him.”

“Yeah, I heard, but don’t worry, he understands that you have something inside you, that, when you are ready, you will tell him.”

Grace sighed sitting down on the edge of her bed. “Why does he have to be such a good guy?” She asked, looking up at Cait.

“Because, he has always been the same, and always will be, fun, trustworthy, and just a great guy.”

“And that is what makes this so hard, no one understands this, one thing I can’t tell him, or anyone is what makes it so hard for me to keep a relationship with any male.”

“How about me? Will you tell me?”

Grace had a tentative look in her eyes, but seeing the sincerity in Cait made it seem like she should. “I don’t know, I don’t want you to think any less of me either.”

“Grace, listen, what happened to you in the past is exactly that, in the past, so no matter what who you are today is still who you are today, ok?”

“Alright, I’ll tell you, but please, don’t tell Chris if he knows, I wan to be the one to tell him, ok?”

“Deal, and take your time, I have all day,” Cait said as she said comfortably on the chair in the corner of the room.

“Alright, let’s just say that growing up for me wasn’t easy, my mom wasn’t much of a mother most of the time and my real dad died when I was only six, so I had to deal my step-father for most of my life,” Grace sighed recalling the way he treated her. “My step-dad was a good guy for the most part until I was about eleven or twelve, then things started to become bad.”

“What do you mean bad?” Cait asked hearing the hesitation in Grace.

“Well, he started drinking and things began to change slowly, He became more angry and violent. First it was throwing things at walls, and breaking them, them it became shoving my mother out of the way and into walls, or down to the ground, soon he was hitting her full force, still drinking heavily everyday. Eventually it became like my own living hell,” Grace paused, wiping tears from, her face.

“He continued drinking and seemed to be at the local bar more than he was at the house, he would come home just about the same time I got back form school, only he seemed to be me home every time,” Grace’s tears flowed down her face as she felt Cait’s arms wrap round her in a comforting hug. “I would come home and he would always tell me I was late, even if I wasn’t, and I would try to ignore, just walk upstairs to my room, mind my own business, but he would stop me, grab my arm and beat me until I stopped fighting, it sort of became a routine and I would try to think of other things while he hit me, I would imagine a life full of happiness, at the point it seemed like a fantasy that would never come true,” There was another pause as she waited for her tears to subside a bit.

As she calmed down Grace continued with her story. “Well, one day I had come home form work, and I was late because I had extra paper work I needed to finish, I knew I was gonna get it bad as soon as I walked in. I stood outside the house and could hear him hitting my mom and her screaming and it killed me but I couldn’t go in, so I got back in my car and rove to my friend Kayla’s house. Well, I was safe for the night but I knew when I went back after work the next day it would be ten times worse,” Grace collected her thoughts and continued on. “Well, I had to go back to my house the next day because I couldn’t stay at Kayla’s forever, and it was stupid of me, he got in my face as soon as he saw me, and wouldn’t leave me alone, I tried to keep doing what I was doing, trying not to puke from the horrible scent of old alcohol on his breath, he hit me and pushed to the ground, by then I was in so much pain and weak I tried so hard to fight him off but I couldn’t, he kicked me in the stomach over and over, it killed and I didn’t have the strength to stop him, soon, he was on top of me making threats probably but at that point I was in too much pain to hear what eh was saying, soon I felt his hands at my waist and got nervous, he just yelled at me and he pulled down my pants and...and...” She couldn’t do it, it was that one word she couldn’t say.

“He what?” Cait encouraged her, she needed to say that word and just get it all out.

“He...he...he r-r-rape-raped me,” She stuttered as she broke down into tears and was comforted by Cait, but she knew she couldn’t do anything but try and soothe her, she couldn’t take away the years of pain and torment she had suffered, keeping this inside her, trying so hard to push it to back of her mind, forget about it but it just didn’t seem possible. It haunted her at all times, when she woke up in the morning she was trying to forget the nightmares she had, had the night before and in the middle of the day it seemed like everything triggered her to think about it.

All she wanted to do was put everything in the past away and start her life new, but she couldn’t, it stayed with her, but it was time to stop it. It was time to let everything go, let it out and let someone help her, she just hoped that that person could be Chris.

“Cait, you don’t understand this do you, it’s not like I haven’t approached the subject, I mean, she knocked me down because of it, come on!” Chris begged some more before he watched Cait walk out of the room slamming the door behind her.

Chris plopped himself down on the couch and let out a loud exaggerated sigh. Why does life have to be so damn complicated? he asked himself, feeling confused and angry at the same time. Why was this so hard? He had talked to Grace so much and suddenly it seemed like such a big task. Why did there have to be this barrier between the two of them, it seemed so useless, though in the end he had to assume it would be worth it.

Chris just wanted his relationship with Grace to be the simple one they had held before, but right now, it didn’t seem like their relationship would ever be simple again. As the thought of never being able to be with Grace haunted Chris he knew he would need to talk to her soon, but he certainly wasn’t looking forward to it.

“What the heck are you talking about?” He asked her.

“Chris, there’s something he needs to talk to Grace about and he won’t do it because he’s scared of what’s going to happen, I know it, he’s such a freaking wimp,” She said angrily.

“Whoa, calm down there tiger, it’ll get to him enough eventually that’ll he get some balls and do it, and seeing as it has to do with Grace, I et a feeling it’ll happen sooner rather than later,” JC informed her.

“Well, I hope you’re right because she really wants to be with that boy, now why, I can’t figure out, but she does,” Cait said, producing a little laugh from JC.

“Alright, let’s move on shall we? Do you want to go out? We have about three hours before we need to be here to get dressed and such.”

“I really want some Starbucks, oh the deliciousness.”

“I don’t know if there’s one around but we can look and if not I’m sure we can find somewhere else to get coffee.” “Maybe, but I want a caramel Frappucino,” Cait said, rubbing her stomach and smiling.

“Alright, let’s go.”

“Ok, I’m gonna grab my hat and then we be out,” She told JC as he rolled his eyes at her obsession with her Yankees hat.

Grace sat on the couch and just stared, never removing her eyes from the door, her thoughts on only one thing, only one man. It seemed like she couldn’t think of anything else lately, he consumed her thoughts and dreams. All she needed to do was tell him one thing and everything would be so perfect, but why did that one thing have to be so big?

Grace heard the doorknob turn and her heart began to race as it opened to reveal Chris’ face...