Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 1
This story is a continuation of ‘But I Want To’ and ‘I Left My Heart in San Francisco’, both short Sav stories. Again, it is completely fictional and is based upon a song that does not belong to me. As a matter of fact, there are many songs in this story that are works of various artists. If you would like information on any of the songs, please contact me at Kimmi@abshire.org and I’ll be happy to pass it along. Enjoy!!
Phil, Sav and Vivian stood around a microphone and worked on the backing vocals for their final song. “…Then every time I turn around… And you're nowhere to be found… I know… I gotta long long way to go… Before I can say goodbye to you… Oh, I gotta long long way I know… Before I can say goodbye… To all I ever knew, to you… To you…”
“I believe that’s a wrap, gentlemen,” Joe clapped his hands together. “Beer? Anyone? Sav?”
“Nah, I’m knackered. I’ll catch ya later,” he walked up the stairs to gather his things.
Phil looked at Joe.
“Just… let ‘im go,” he waved it off.
He walked into his house and pressed the button on the answering machine. “Hey. Let me guess, you’re in the studio and forgot to take your cell phone again,” she sighed. He looked over to see his cell phone on the counter. “I guess I’ll… try again tomorrow. Love you.”
“Shit,” he sighed as he plopped down onto the sofa. The music was still going through his mind, so he decided to watch a little television. Stopping on a music channel, he threw the remote onto the floor.
“This just in… Country Diva Mindee Thompson has decided to extend her already lengthy world tour due to the enormous success of her crossover hit ‘Without You’. Mindee’s already been on the road for the last year and a half and will now extend until Christmas of this year. This on the heels of her smash duet with Travis Tritt proves that it has definitely been a great year for the popular songstress, who is rumored to have had a short fling with British rock bassist Rick Savage a few years back… Here’s a clip of Mindee’s video from the soundtrack of the very popular action movie, ‘Thermal Meltdown’.”
“Without you I’m not okay… And without you I’ve lost my way… my heart’s stuck in second place… ooh… Without you…”
“Jesus Christ!” he turned the television off and threw the remote across the room. She was everywhere and yet he couldn’t be with her.
Mindee sipped on herb tea as she went over fan mail. Todd walked to the back of the bus and handed her a CD.
“What’s this?” she whispered.
“From Joe Elliott.”
She raised her eyebrows and then looked down to see that it was a rough cut of Def Leppard’s new album. She opened up the jewel case as a note fell out. She smiled when she saw Joe’s handwriting.
I lied. It’s just the songs written by the love of your life. Think we’re gonna call this one the ‘Mindee Album’. Tata for now, Joe.
“Smartass,” she popped the disk in and listened.
“I don't wanna fall in love… But it's been taken out of my hands… And right now I realize… I don't wanna say goodbye… I miss you more than words can say… They never turn out right… But here goes anyway…
Everyday I miss your touch… Never thought it would mean so much… All the words I could have said… Got me reelin' torn to shreds… Every road I go is nowhere… But I know you're out there somewhere… These voices in my head… Got me feelin' torn to shreds…”
She stopped the player and wiped the tears from her eyes before walking away.
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 2
Mindee stood on the balcony of her hotel room and stared at the Eiffel Tower. She watched all of the others walk arm in arm, hand in hand. There was a time when she loved her life. The traveling, the interviews, the lifestyle… what happened?
“Hey Min, phone,” Todd yelled from the desk inside her room.
“I didn’t even hear it ring,” she smiled as she walked in and took it.
“Surprise, surprise,” he raised his eyebrows as he looked through papers.
“Hello?” she stuck her tongue out at him.
“Hey,” is all he could manage out.
“Hi,” she closed her eyes. “I’ve heard your voicemail message so many times I forgot you could say anythin’ else.”
“Very funny, smartass.”
“What’s goin’ on?”
“We finished the album. It’s bein’ mixed as we speak.”
“Really?” her heart began to race. “So… what are you doin’ now?”
“Photo shoot in London next week. Then we’re supposed to finalize the cover. Think I might go to Sheffield for a while and spend some time with Mum.”
“Ah. Good idea,” she tried not to sound too disappointed.
“So you’re in Paris?”
“Yeah. There’s a theatre thingy that I’ve been invited to tonight.”
“By whom?”
“This really cute hunk of a guy,” she giggled.
“Min,” he whined.
“Yeah, whatever. The mayor, I think. Scrawny little bald dude,” she fell back onto the bed and twirled her hair around her finger.
“Anyway, what’s your schedule like?”
“We’ve actually got a week long break. The boys wanna do Cannes. I might just work on my tan.”
“Oh,” he tried not to sound too disappointed.
“Funny that during my break I’ve got twice as many friggin’ interviews to do.”
“That’s what you get for bein’ a ‘Country Diva’.”
“Oh God, where’d you hear that one?”
“The tele a few nights ago.”
“Ug,” she growled. “Just don’t let the band hear that one. They’ll give me the ol’ Gatorade plunge on stage again.”
He laughed as he imagined her band throwing a huge cooler of water over her head.
“My guitar was sticky for two weeks after that one, it’s not funny!”
“Yes, it is.”
“Min, we’ve gotta go,” Todd tapped his watch.
“Just a sec,” she sighed.
“Gotta go?”
“The theatre can wait,” she spat.
“No it can’t. Go on,” he looked up as Joe walked in and tapped on his wrist.
“Fine. I’ll call tomorrow night.”
“I’ll be here.”
“Love you.”
“Love you.”
They both hung up.
“So what’s it like to ‘ave a girlfriend you ‘aven’t shagged in over a year?” Joe chuckled.
“Bite me,” he grabbed his jacket. “And just for that one, you’re buyin’ dinner.”
“Shit!” he rolled his eyes as he followed him out the door. “Thank God it’s a free bar!”
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 3
Mindee sat on the bus and strummed her guitar before writing a few notes onto the paper in front of her. Charlie sat next to her and looked over her shoulder.
“Let’s hear it,” he smiled.
She smiled before beginning. “I used to sing to him… It used to make him smile… He knew all the words… For a while… I sang love me tender… Always and forever… Hold me baby all night long… I could go on and on… But that’s another song…”
She stopped. “That’s all I’ve got, but here’s the bridge; Oh, the way I used to hold him… The things I should’ve told him… If I could make the clock unwind… Back to when he was mine… But that’s another time…”
“You’re soundin’ awfully past tense on that one,” he watched her.
She sighed. “I do, don’t I?”
“You okay?”
“I don’t know anymore, Chuck. I’m to that point, ya know?”
“Yeah, but the first time you see him again, you’ll change your mind.”
She smiled. “Probably.”
Sav sat in the lobby and waited with the rest of the band as they went over concepts for their next video. There was a television in the corner playing videos that the director had created.
“Look, there’s Mindee,” Phil pointed as everyone looked up.
“That’s the duet she did with what’s-his-face,” Sav nodded.
They were all silent as they watched and listened.
Travis Tritt began singing as they panned to shots of Mindee standing in the corner of a party with a man. “You ask who’s lying in my bed… And is it really love we’re making… Well my heart’s hanging by a thread… She’s the only reason it ain’t breaking… Do you ever cross my mind… Well darling fact is you still do… That’s the reason she is here… Wiping your old memory clear… She’s helping me get over you…”
The scene changed to the two meeting in the middle of the room. “Helping me get over you… One kiss at a time… ‘Cause all the pain that we’ve been through… Still weighs so heavy on my mind… Getting past the love we lost… That’s a lonely bridge to cross… So I did what I had to do… I had to find somebody new… Who’s helping me get over you…”
It was now Mindee’s turn to watch Travis at the party with another woman. “I know you’d never ask his name… But in your heart I know you wonder… I’m not much good at playing games… I’m just trying to keep from going under… There’s no forever in his eyes… It’s not the love that we once knew… Oh and it might be a sin… But tonight I’ve got a friend… Helping me get over you…”
“Cigarette break? Anyone?” Sav sighed and walked out of the building.
“Aye, it was just a song, mate,” Joe ran after him. “You know it’s not real life.”
“I know, I know,” he sighed. “And it would be completely different if it wasn’t…”
“Her voice?”
“Yeah,” he looked out at the traffic. “I’m not sure how much longer I can do this.”
“Okay, there’s a huge festival on Christmas Eve that we’ve been asked to do.” Todd spoke to the band.
“Where?” Mindee showed no enthusiasm.
“London.”
“What other bands?” Trey asked.
“They’re trying to book us first, and then use that to pull others in. It will more than likely be artist from Pop, Rock and Country.”
They all looked at Mindee and waited. It was evident to her that they wanted to do it.
“As long as I get mistletoe patrol,” she smiled.
“There’s a festival on Christmas Eve that we’ve been asked to do.” Malvin spoke to the band.
“Where?” Joe raised his eyebrows.
“London.”
“What other bands?” Phil asked.
“U2 and Mindee Thompson so far.”
They all looked at Sav and waited.
“Hell yes!” he smacked the table.
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 4
Mindee walked onto the stage wearing a pair of baggy cargo pants that hung from her hips and a tight, white tank top. She picked up her guitar and played a few chords before speaking into the microphone.
“Who the hell tuned this?”
Her band mates pointed to the guitar tech.
“Jimmy, dude, you are so buyin’ the first round tonight!” she laughed.
“Wooooo Hooooo!” the rest of the band hooped and hollered as she tuned her guitar.
“Okay, we ready?” she looked behind her and waited for nods. “Let’s do this.”
“Please forgive me, I know this is kinda strange… Just appear here out of the blue, askin’ your name… But I couldn’t let another day go by bein’ strangers… I haven’t met you, but I want to… I haven’t kissed you, but I need to… I don’t know you, but I want to… yeah I want to… Yeah, I’d like to get to know you better… Maybe we could get together… Sometime, oh anytime at all… La la la la la la la la… La la la la la la la la… La la la la la la la la…”
Mindee stopped singing. “Am I the only one gettin’ feedback in my monitor?”
“No!” Charlie and Trey yelled.
“Well can we fix it?” she looked out at the sound as she took her guitar off and sat it aside. “Ready?” she looked around as she stepped up to the microphone as the music started up again. “I’ve sure enjoyed the rain… But I’m looking forward to the sun… You have to feel the pain… When you lose the love you gave someone… I thought by now the time… Would take away these lonely tears… I hope you’re doing fine all alone… But where do I go from here… ‘Cause without you I’m not okay… And without you I’ve lost my way… my heart’s stuck in second place… ooh… Without you…” They skipped to the bridge to test her high notes with the sound. “Somebody tell my head to try to tell my heart… That I’m better off without you… ‘Cause baby I can’t live…” She stayed at the high note as the sound tech adjusted the tone. She nodded as they played the chorus again. “Without you I’m not okay… And without you I’ve lost my way… my heart’s stuck in second place… ooh… Without you… Without you…”
“Great, Min.” the sound manager gave her a thumb-up.
She nodded as she once again reached for her guitar.
“Alrighty boys, let’s get warmed up,” Mindee nodded as a fast paced bluegrass-sounding song began. She grinned as she stepped up to the microphone. “He pushed me ‘round… Now I’m drawin’ the line… He lived his life… Now I’m gonna go live mine… I’m sick of wastin’ my time… Well now I’ve been good for way too long… Found my red dress and I’m gonna throw it on… ‘Bout to get too far gone… Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition… Need a little bit more of my twelve-ounce nutrition… One more helpin’ of what I’ve been havin’… I’m takin’ my turn of the sin wagon… On a mission to make something happen… Feel like Delilah lookin’ for Samson… Do a little mattress dancin’… That’s right, I said mattress dancin’… Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition… Need a little bit more of what I’ve been missin’… I don’t know where I’ll be crashin’… But I’m arrivin’ on a sin wagon… When it’s my turn to march up to glory… I’m gonna have one hell of a story… That’s if he forgives me… Oh Lord please forgive me… Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition… Need a little bit more of that sweet salvation… They may take me with my feet draggin’… But I’ll fly away on a sin wagon…”
“Very nice,” Todd clapped his hands together from side stage.
“Okay, the new one,” she once again began to play her guitar. “Where do… I start… Lyin’ on a blanket underneath the stars with… Your head on… My chest… I always liked that best… I hate how… Time flies… I still think back sometimes ‘bout… Your lips on… My neck… I always liked that best… That time we… Took a ride… Ended up down by the riverside… Soft touch… Wet kiss… I always liked that best… I like the way you used to hold me… I like the way you came to know me… You came to know me well… Well… Well…” She lifted her thumb up to signal that she liked the sound on the electric guitar. “Fallin’… To sleep… Wearin’ your shirt ‘cause it smelled so sweet… Who could… Forget… I always liked that best or… Loosin’… My heart… Every time you sang to me on your guitar… Lady… In Red… I always liked that best… I like the way you used to hold me… I like the way you came to know me… You came to know me well… Well… Well… I could go on… So many things I miss now that you’re gone… Your love… Oh yes… I always liked that best…”
“So when does she find out you’re here?” Phil patted Sav on the back as they stood at the back of the arena.
“Haven’t decided yet,” he grinned.
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 5
“Press conference in 10!” Todd rushed into the room full of the band and Mindee.
“Okay, so when they ask the usual ‘How do you get along with…’ question, who the hell else is here?” she took a drink of her water.
“Lemme see…” he smiled at Randy before reading off the list. “U2, N’Sync, BB Mak, Avril Lavigne, Pink, The Calling… oh, did I mention Def Leppard?”
“Huh?” she whipped her head up to look at him.
The entire band broke out into laughter.
“Y’all knew?” she squealed as she began throwing pillows. “Ah!!!” she screamed before running toward the hall.
“So we don’t even go on ‘till near the end?” Joe read over the itinerary as the other four looked over his shoulder.
“Ready?” Malvin joined them.
“She’s gonna see ya, and you’ll be in big trouble,” Joe pressed his finger into Sav’s chest.
“I seriously doubt that.”
“Pretty damned sure of yourself, are’tcha?” she walked past them with the band and Todd.
He grinned at her. “I’ll make it up to ya later.”
“If I can get a few minutes away from the boyfriend,” she stuck her tongue out at him.
“Hey, that ain’t funny!” he yelped as Malvin pulled him into the pressroom.
She stood at the door and stared at him throughout the press conference. What took a few minutes seemed like hours. Then, it was her turn. As they passed one another, they brushed hands. Just being that close was driving them wild.
He stood in the back of the room with Phil and watched as she answered questions. Then, it was asked.
“Miss Thompson, Thomas Ellis of the Herald, is it true that you and Rick Savage have been involved romantically and if so, are you still together?”
She smiled at the reporter. “That’s an awfully personal question, Mr. Ellis.”
“You’re a public figure, Miss. We deserve to know.”
She stared at him for a moment. “Next question?” she looked around.
“What are your plans now that your tour is finally over?”
“A very long vacation,” she answered.
“When will you begin to record your next album?”
“When we get enough songs to start,” she pointed to another reporter.
“Miss Thompson, you’re 37 years old. Are their plans for marriage and children in your immediate future?”
“Ask me again in ten years,” she pointed to another reporter. “Last question, please.”
“Any plans for Christmas?”
“My parents, little sister and brother-in-law are flyin’ in this afternoon. We’re havin’ a traditional Thompson dinner, but I’m afraid there won’t be enough for y’all,” she giggled before rising to her feet. “Thank you.”
“Nice,” Sav met her in the hallway.
“I could’ve been ornery and said ‘none ya damned business’,” she grinned.
He took her hand, “we’ve got an interview.”
“Me too,” she nodded.
They stared quietly into one another’s eyes.
“I’m afraid that if I kiss you we’ll never get to the show,” he struggled with what he needed to do and what he wanted to do.
“I was just thinkin’ the same thing,” she whispered.
“Then I’ll see ya later tonight.”
“Yeah,” she squeezed his hand. “I love you.”
“I know,” he winked at her before walking away.
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 6
“There you are!” Mindee hugged her parents.
“Wow, you look great!” her sister squealed.
“So do you!” she held her hand out to feel her pregnant belly. “Wow!”
“Todd tells us we’ll finally be meetin’ this Rick guy!” her father smiled.
“Yeah, his family’s here too. I guess we’ll all finally meet,” she led them to the waiting limo.
“Richard!” his mother kissed his cheek.
“Hiya!” he smiled at his brothers.
“So, is this the Mindee Thompson you talk about?” his oldest brother pointed to a poster.
“Uh… yeah. You’ll get to meet her and her family t’night.”
“Anythin’ else?” his mother waited.
“Not yet, Mum,” he grinned. “C’mon, now.”
“Great seats, huh?” Mindee giggled as she showed her family to their seats stage right.
“Here we are,” Sav showed his family to their seats stage left.
Mindee just happened to look up. “Aw, hell!”
Sav looked across the stage to see her glaring at him with her hands on her hips. “Shit!”
“Well, there they are!” she pointed.
“That would be Mindee,” he sighed.
“Guess we’ll meet ‘em later,” she laughed.
“What’s a few more hours?” Sav laughed.
“Well, I’ve gotta go sign a few autographs. Enjoy the show,” she hugged each of them.
“Got a fan meeting. Enjoy the show,” Sav waved before walking off.
Neither saw one another again until The Calling went on. They were the band right before the Leps and they were really good. Mindee listened as Sav stood behind her with his hands on her shoulders. The last of their songs began.
“So lately, been wondering… Who will be there to take my place… When I'm gone you'll need love… to light the shadows on your face… If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all… Then between the sand and stone, could you make it on your own… If I could, then I would… I'll go wherever you will go… Way up high or down low, I'll go wherever you will go…”
Mindee closed her eyes as she sank back into him. He wrapped his arms around her.
“And maybe, I'll find out… A way to make it back someday… To watch you, to guide you, through the darkest of your days… If a great wave shall fall and fall upon us all… Then I hope there's someone out there… Who can bring me back to you… If I could, then I would… I'll go wherever you will go… Way up high or down low, I'll go wherever you will go…”
She turned to see him. Was he thinking the same thing?
“Min,” he caressed her face.
“Run away with my heart… Run away with my hope… Run away with my love… I know now, just quite how … My life and love may still go on… In your heart, in your mind, I'll stay with you for all of time… If I could, then I would… I'll go wherever you will go… Way up high or down low, I'll go wherever you will go…”
Tears filled her eyes as she made up her mind. “Tell me you love me,” she whispered.
“I love you more than I love myself,” he kissed her.
“If I could turn back time… I’d go wherever you will go… If I could make you mine… I’ll go wherever you will go…”
Can’t Say Goodbye
Chapter 7
“Yes, I’m sure. We can wait. A few months for all I care. I know. Okay, Todd. Bye,” Mindee carefully sat the phone in it’s cradle.
“Still workin’?” Sav walked in and wrapped his arms around her.
“One last thing,” she smiled. “We’re finally alone, whatever shall we do?”
"Come on." He led her into the bedroom. She slowly pulled him toward the bed as they kissed passionately. She unbuttoned her sweater and let it fall to the floor as she gently lay across the bed. He crawled onto the bed beside her and kissed her shoulder while removing her lacy, blue bra. He then kissed her chest, paying special attention to each breast as he gently teased her with his tongue. Then, he slowly moved downward and unzipped her jeans. While still moving down, he removed them as well.
She slid his jeans off and threw them across the room as he smiled and kissed along her spine. "What's this?" He touched the tattoo on her lower back.
"Your initials. You like it?"
"Yes." He rolled on top of her and kissed her chin. His kisses moved down her body as he nibbled on her neck, chest and stomach.
He sat between her legs and removed her silky panties. He began kissing at her left ankle and worked his way slowly back to her lips. Slowly, he positioned himself and began making love to her.
The heat in their bodies grew, causing an eruption of sweat. The energy between them rose increasingly stronger like a fever as the climax of their love exploded. They both moaned at the release that was felt when their bodies reached the plateau of their pleasure.
He kissed her gently as they lay in each other’s arms, panting and exhausted. It had been a long, trying day. But now the ending was perfect.
“Merry Christmas,” she woke him up with a kiss.
“Merry Christmas,” he took her head into his hands and pulled her back to look into her eyes. “Come back with me.”
“For as long as you’ll have me,” she smiled.
“What do you mean? Forever if you put it that way.”
“Sounds good to me.”
“You’re kiddin’, right?”
“I’m officially on hiatus. Indefinitely. Todd’s gonna announce it to the record company Monday mornin’,” she waited for his reaction.
“You did this for me?”
“And for me. I can’t be away from you again. I won’t put us through it.”
“But…”
“Shh,” She covered his mouth with hers.
He rolled her over and pushed her body into the mattress with his. “Do you realize what you’ve done?”
“I’ve made up my mind. And yes, I’ve very aware of it.”
He smiled before kissing her once again.
He watched her sleep as the plane took off. He turned his head to look at Phil across the aisle. He gave him a thumbs-up and grinned. He smiled and then returned his attention to Mindee.
“Min?” he whispered.
There was no response.
He took her hand and waited. Still nothing, she was completely out. He took a deep breath and slipped a diamond solitaire onto her finger.
“Yes!” Phil whispered wildly as he stood up and looked over the seat at Joe and Rick.
“She awake?” Joe peeked over the seat.
“Guys, sit down!” Bobbie spat. “We’re still taking off!” She then looked between the seats. “She’s still asleep.”
Once they closed in on Dublin, he decided to wake her. “Mindee, we’re almost home, luv.”
“Mmm,” she whimpered as she turned her head.
“We’ll be landin’ soon,” he waited.
“Okay,” she whispered as she scratched her hand. She slowly opened her eyes and looked down at the ring. Her eyes widened as she looked up at him.
“Well looky there,” he smiled nervously.
“What… is… does this… really?”
“Really.”
“Yes!” she yelped as she threw her arms around him.
They were kissing as the plane landed.
“Go home, already!” Joe huffed.
“Home,” Mindee grinned.
“Home,” Sav kissed her.