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By subscription only! Welcome to another issue of:
"THE BALANCED WOMAN".
Thanks to all of you who have encouraged your friends to subscribe! You are important to us. So rest assured we will NEVER sell or give away your email addresses to anyone!!
We realize that not all of the email programs available can accommodate our size. So you can also find this issue of The Balanced Woman at: http://angelfire.com/sd/BalancedWoman/issue15.html
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IN THIS ISSUE
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=> Welcome
=> Feature Article: "Independence Day"
=> Household Tip
=> Column: "Most Stress is How
We Respond to It"
=> Parenting Tip
=> Classified Ads
=> Guest Column:"The Top 10 Things
You Need to
Know About Conflict Resolution"
=> Pampering Yourself
=> Can You Help this Reader?
=> Help Others and Help Yourself
=> Subscribe/Un subscribe information
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WELCOME
July is upon us already! Your kids are out of school. Between that and the heat of summer you can probably use a break right now :) This month's newsletter features a couple of timely articles on Stress and Conflict Resolution! I sure hope they help. And if you're really pulling your hair out trying to cope with everything take a look at another helpful zine. It contains Free Timely Time Management Tips to increase your personal productivity and give you more time and balance for your personal life. Subscribe now at:http://www.topica.com/lists/timemanagement
Many thanks to those of you who responded to our reader's question last month about how to remove gum from her dryer. You can find all of YOUR wonderful responses and helpful hints at: http://angelfire.com/sd/BalancedWoman/gum.htm
Quick site updates for you…
Please visit our message boards!! This week's question is "What is
the biggest challenge facing women today?" Be sure to stop by and
contribute your thoughts or suggest a topic for next week! You can
find the message board at: http://www.betweenfriends.org
We have also updated the site poll. So please stop by and cast your vote, if you haven't yet. While there, you'll also find the results of the previous poll at http://www.betweenfriends.org/poll.html
We've added a new section called "Andy's Antics"! Curious? Take a look at http://www.betweenfriends.org We hope you'll be amused :)
And courtesy of Andy we've added a new quick and delicious recipe.
I've tried this one myself. It's good; it's quick and it's easy!
http://www.betweenfriends.org/househol.htm
Well, that's it for this month. I hope you enjoy this issue!
jackie
PS: Please visit our website often at: http://www.betweenfriends.org
It's full of articles, tips and links to help you bring more balance into
your life.
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This Month's Sponsors!
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Feature Article: Independence Day
By: Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale
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For those of us who live in the US, July brings with it the anniversary of our Independence Day. On July fourth Americans broke free from British government, British rules and British expectations.
In reflecting upon our country's Independence Day it occurred to me that we could all probably use our own, personal Independence Day. Not an Independence Day from our countries, our politics or our economics. One that has more to do with our independence from the roles we play every day for everyone else. An Independence Day from the expectations of others.
What expectations of others?
You are so many different things to so many different people. You are a daughter, a wife, a mother, an employee and a friend. Each one of these roles is filled with built in expectations about who you are and how you will behave.
As a daughter you may be labeled rebellious or difficult, mature or level headed, or calm and sensitive. You may be expected to be academically superior or athletically gifted. Maybe you are considered the family glue or the flighty, free spirit. Maybe the expectations of you are entirely different. Maybe so. But I suspect they exist, nonetheless.
As a wife you may be labeled neat or disorganized, a good cook or a bad cook, someone who can take care of the house, or someone who can tear it apart. You may be thought of as supportive and caring, or selfish and self centered.
As a mother you may be expected to provide meals and groceries, clean clothes and toothpaste, and nurturing and caring. Your children may think you know everything or nothing at all. They may expect you to exist for them or be angry that you do.
As a friend you may be labeled as funny or serious, pretty or plain, grumpy or light hearted, fickle or loyal. Your friends may think you are irresponsible or someone they can always count on.
If you think about it you can discover many characteristics that have assigned to you. How often have you displayed them solely because "you were supposed to"?
The labels can be endless. The truth is not. But the point is not what the labels are, the point is, are they you? Some of the expectations from some of the roles you play probably are you. They are who you are intrinsically and who you want to be. But some of the expectations from some of the roles you play are probably NOT you. They are the faces you put on to fulfill the needs of others.
You may have been wearing these faces for so long now that you don't know where your roles end and where you begin. You know you're spending most of your time "being" who you are "expected" to be. But somewhere amongst those expectations you got lost. You may not KNOW who you are anymore and in your quieter moments, that may scare you. Is it hopeless? Can you ever find yourself again? Of course you can! And it's really not that difficult!
Start by paying attention to your actions and your words. If you do, you'll find that sometimes you feel more energized. Other times you feel more fulfilled and occasionally you even feel happier. What are you doing when you feel this way? Where are you? What are you saying? Who are you with? Take the time to discover the answers to these questions because it is when you feel more energized, fulfilled and happy that you come the closest to being who you were meant to be. Get to know THAT person! Then dedicate one whole day to "being" her and no one else. Declare that day YOUR Independence Day!
I have a good friend who recently graduated from college. She's beginning her career and her true step off into life. She is struggling with the same issues we've all faced at one time or another. Besides deciding what it is she really wants to do, she's trying to figure out who she is and what she wants. Someone once gave her some profound advice. They told her:
"Relax. Live your life and keep your eyes on your dreams. Let the rest work itself out along the way."
THAT sounds like a Declaration of Independence to me!
Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale is a CPA and the editor of Between Friends: Living Life Your Way (http://www.betweenfriends.org) Between Friends is a website dedicated to helping women balance their responsibilities so that they can make more time for themselves. It does this by providing tips, tricks and tools for household hints, parenting, budgeting, self-improvement and more! It also offers a FREE monthly ezine: The Balanced Woman. Visit today!
Webmasters and publishers may use this article in their ezine or website,
as long as the *entire*
article is used, and the *copyright notice* and *resource box* are
left in tact, including this notice
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HOUSEHOLD HINT OF THE MONTH
When food debris gets "cooked" onto the inside surfaces of your microwave, it can be difficult to clean. To make the job easier, boil a cup of water in your microwave and let it sit inside the oven steaming for 5-10 minutes. This will soften the debris, making it easy to wipe clean.
Excerpted from Tipomatic at http://www.emazing.com EMAZING delivers FREE greeting cards, tips, news, comics, and horoscopes to your email box daily.
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"Most stress is How We Respond to It"
By: Debra Cohen
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Everyday it seems that there is never enough time and that situations
and other people increase our tension. Most of stress is how we respond
to it and not just "out there".
Remember it is much easier to nip something in the bud then to deal with stress after it flowers into physical symptoms or a bad mood.
If you get into a funk sometimes it can last for days and it's often hard to break free of it. When you can "catch" the negative moment beginning you have a great shot at stopping it from taking you down.
I've found these helpful for myself as well as my clients:
1) If you feel a certain "mood" beginning (ie depression, anger, discouragement) try to do something physical such as go running, swim, or even clean. It's good to do something that will tune up your nervous and glandular system .
2) There are two breathing exercises from yoga that are very helpful to cultivate a neutral mind. One is called "Alternate nostril breathing" and the other is called "Breath of Fire". You can learn these from a yoga class or video or write yogabreathing@sendfree.com
3) Identify and write down the mental tape loops that you finding yourself repeating. By knowing what these are you can watch it instead of take it as your own identity. The more you "see" the dramas the less you react from within them.
4) Keep a notebook of inspiring anectdotes , quotes and tips. This helps
to boost one's spirit and also to feel connected with others that have
dealt with similar feelings.
Debra Cohen, LCSW Get Inspirational Quotes mailed daily to your
email box: Send an email to: Philosophyquotes-subscribe@listbot.com
Think outside the box and get a new perspective.
Visit: http://www.outside-the-box.net
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PARENTING TIP OF THE MONTH
My kid loves to threaten that she's going to run away. What should I do?
Contact your local Juvenile Detention to understand your local law.
In most states, it is a crime to run away. This crime is punishable in
Juvenile court and your child may spend some time behind bars. Explain
the law to your child. I'd suggest immediate intervention by a professional,
since a threat to run away is a sign your child is trying to get your attention.
Excerpted from Tipomatic at http://www.emazing.com EMAZING delivers FREE greeting cards, tips, news, comics, and horoscopes to your email box daily.
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Top 10 Things You Need to Know About Conflict Resolution
By Terri Levine
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1. Conflict is natural and can be healthy.
2. Unresolved conflict is not healthy.
3. Joint solving involves open communication.
4. Focus is on the situation and not the person.
5. People need to come up with the solutions or they won't get implemented.
6. People get upset when their expectations are not fulfilled.
7. People get upset when they hold back on what they want to say.
8. People get upset when someone or something is standing
in their way.
9. What you resist persists -- communication is key.
10. Each person is right.
Submitted by Terri Levine, Professional and Personal Coach. Terri is a coach to successful business leaders, top executives,and a developer of people with potential for greatness. Terri can be visited on the Web at www.comprehensivecoaching.com. For more information about Comprehensive Coaching, call toll free 888-899-7916. To receive a copy of Terri's free weekly newsletter, The Coach's Corner, send an email to CoachesCorner-On@lists.webvalence.com.
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Pampering Yourself
July is a good time to go to an ole fashioned ice cream shop! Go alone; indulge in your favorite dish. Take a book; take a magazine; take a journal or just take your thoughts...
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Can You Help
this Reader?
Please, answer this question for me; How do I get two china glasses apart that are stuck together? Thank you. Please send your suggestions to me at jahale95@yahoo.com with "glasses" in the subject.
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HELP OTHERS AND HELP YOURSELF
SPONSORS FEED HUNGRY SENIORS FOR FREE!
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Now parents can visit this website 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and enter their questions anonymously. These are then carefully answered by Liam McEvoy, BAA (SW) CSW, Family Therapist and Director of Counseling Associates. Liam is well known in counseling circles for his considerable success with difficult cases. Feel free to stop by, voice your concerns, share advice with others and see what advice Liam has to offer.
Sara Jordan Publishing is a publisher of educational songs that teach. Please feel free to visit our site for family fun. enter our contests, listen to a few songs and participate in the many free activities.
Sara offers the free Parenting Forum on her site because of her own experience and concern that dealing with parenting issues is an important for all families. You can visit her site at http://www.sara-jordan.com
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Disclaimer
The appearance of advertising in The Balanced Woman should not be interpreted
as an endorsement by the editors of the service, product, business, or
program being advertised. We take no responsibility for claims or
representations made in any ads. The Balanced Woman is for informational
and entertainment purposes only. The ideas and information expressed
in it have not been approved or authorized by anyone either explicitly
or implicitly. In no event shall Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale be liable
for any damages whatsoever resulting from any action arising in connection
with the use of this information or its publication, including any action
for infringement of copyright or defamation. The opinions expressed
by our columnists are not necessarily the position of The Balanced Woman.
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Copyright 1999, 2000 JA Hale
Editor's Comments: If any of you have any ideas, comments and suggestions
on how we can improve this e-zine please let me know. Just send an
email to: jahale95@yahoo.com
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