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By subscription only! Welcome to another issue of:

                "THE BALANCED WOMAN".

Thanks to all of you who have encouraged your friends to subscribe!  You are important to us.  So rest assured we will NEVER sell or give away your email addresses to anyone!!

We realize that not all of the email programs available can accommodate our size.  So you can also find this issue of The Balanced Woman at: http://www.betweenfriends.vjungle.com/issue25.html

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              IN THIS ISSUE
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       => Welcome
       => Feature Article: "Is Time Really the Answer?"
       => Household Hint
       => Parenting Tip
       => Classified Ads
       => Pampering Yourself
       => Help Others without Spending a Dime!
       => Subscribe/Un subscribe information

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                       WELCOME

Well, the sun is finally shining here in Southern California.  I know it has a reputation of being sunny all the time but we've sure had our share of gloom the past 3 months!  It seems Spring has finally Sprung!

Mother's Day will soon be here so Happy Mother's Day to all of you moms out there!  Last year I wrote a piece to celebrate this momentous occasion.  It can be found at http://angelfire.com/sd/BalancedWoman/mothersday.htm

Hopefully you've noticed that the web site is changing again!  I'm trying to alter the colors and the print to be more friendly to your eyes :) (and mine too). And I'm also changing the theme slightly.  The new theme is "Helping you to Take Control of your Time, Money, Home and more".  It occurred to me that Balancing your Life is really about "taking control".  So, slowly but surely, I'm adding new articles and new tips to reflect the new theme!  Stop by, surf a little and take a peek!

As odds would have you're still evenly split on the format of this zine.  Some of you like it shorter; some want it longer again.  So my new idea to keep both sides happy is to continue with one article and a few tips with links to more relevant and newer articles on the site.

If you only have a few minutes, you can stick to the email.  If you'd like more you'll have clickable links to more!  I'm hoping that this turns out to be a good compromise!  Look for this month's articles in site updates below!

Well, I've gone on long enough so on to the issue!  I hope you enjoy the rest!
jackie

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Site Updates...http://www.betweenfriends.org

Please stop by and cast your vote at our completely anonymous site poll, if you haven't yet.  This month's poll asks:

Should the 15 year old suspect in the recent Santana High School shootings be tried as an adult or as a juvenile?

While there, you'll also find the results of the previous poll at http://www.betweenfriends.org/poll.html

This month's recipe is Pepperoni and Pasta!  It's one of my old stand by's and of course <grin> I think it's quick, delicious and easy!  You can find the link for it at http://www.betweenfriends.org/househol.htm

If you have an easy, family recipe you'd like to share please send it to me at jahale95@yahoo.com and we'll feature it in an upcoming newsletter

Get organized!  Read Maria Gracia's article "10 Minute Tricks to Help You Get Organized"  It's at http://betweenfriends.vjungle.com/organized.htm

Take control of your time!  Read Donald Wetmore's article "Prioritizing Power" at http://betweenfriends.vjungle.com/timemgmt.htm

Finally, please jump on into our message boards.  I've had a few people email me with laundry problems, cleaning problems, etc.  I posted them on the message boards hoping you could help.  You can find the link on our home page at http://www.betweenfriends.org  Your fellow subscribers thank you!

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Feature Article: Is Time Really the Answer?
By:  Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale
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In the last 2 issues I asserted that the key to a more balanced life is knowing yourself.  The first in this series covered all of the reasons that you may not know who you really are and the second in this series looked at how to get to know yourself again.  (If you missed those articles, they can be found at http://betweenfriends.vjungle.com/issue23.html and http://betweenfriends.vjungle.com/issue24.html)

Hopefully by now you've been able to define what a "balanced life" means to you.  By discovering who you really are you have pinpointed that which is truly important and you have uncovered those areas that need more attention!  Armed with that self-knowledge you can be ready to make some changes!

But it still boils down to time, doesn't it…if only you had more time, if only...

So, let's take a look at time.  Let's look at it for what it is, an objective measurement of a day.  By itself, it is NOT the enemy, as we so often believe.  It's not our friend either.  It just is.  And it "just is" whatever we make it to be.  Each of us can "choose" how to spend our time.  It doesn't always feel that way but time is a choice, and it is our choice alone.

There are 24 hours in each day.  Most of us need 8 to sleep.  So, there are 16 hours left.  On average, it takes approximately an hour to eat, shower, groom and get dressed in the morning, bringing down the remaining available hours to 15.

If you work outside the home you probably work an 8-hour day (at least) with an additional hour for lunch.  Your commute is on average 30 minutes each way.  All of that reduces your day to 5 hours.  Yep, that's it--5 hours.  And you wonder why you can't get anything done??  Perhaps that explains it.  The time that you REALLY have to manage (otherwise known as your discretionary time) is 5 hours a day.  In that time, you must get dinner ready and clean it up.  You've got to put your kids in the bath, make sure they've done their homework, pay your bills, straighten up the house, catch up with your spouse, do the laundry and prepare for the next day!

If you stay at home with kids, you've probably got a little more discretionary time but not as much as everyone else thinks you have ? Let's face it, you're busy too, feeding, entertaining and picking after your children, not to mention all of the volunteer work you do!

The point is, regardless of where you work or what you do, there's just not much time left over to take care of everything that "needs" to be done.

But you know what?  It's not really about time.  Having more of it still wouldn't bring balance back into your life.  You'd just end up filling it with more of the same.  Balance is about setting priorities and living consciously each day in alignment with those.  See, the problem is that most of us don't do that.  Instead we do the same things day in and day out.  We go through the same motions.  We make the same mistakes.  And we do all of this without ever paying attention to what we're doing.  Most of life's daily activities become habits!  So life continues to spin out of control because no one is steering it!

Get out of the mind set that you need more time!  Instead, begin to understand that what must be changed are your habits.  Ask yourself daily if what you're doing is consistent with what you "want" to be doing.  Realign your activities, as much as you can, to do those things that support that which is important to you.

When you get home at night and find yourself "picking up", stop and ask yourself if that time might be better spent talking to your kids. When you're preparing dinner in the kitchen ask your family to join you so that you can fix dinner and find out about their day too.  After dinner when you find yourself "numbing out" in front of the TV, stop and ask yourself if that time might be better spent communicating with your spouse.  On the weekend, if you're checking in with the office, writing some memo or doing work that you've brought home, think about it and decide if it's really important enough to miss time with your family and friends.

Each day you have thousands of moments to spend in activities that will truly enhance your life and bring you joy.  Recognize them.  Take advantage of them!  Stop flying on autopilot.  Grab the wheel.  And once you do, you'll begin to change your life, for the better, forever…
 

Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale is a CPA and the editor of Between Friends: Resources for Mothers (http://www.betweenfriends.org) Between Friends contains household hints, time management tips, articles on organization, parenting, money management, career, self employment, self improvement and more!  Subscribe to its FREE monthly ezine, The Balanced Woman.  Visit today!

Webmasters and publishers may use this article in their ezine or website, as long as the *entire*
article is used, and the *copyright notice* and *resource box* are left in tact, including this notice

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            HOUSEHOLD HINT OF THE MONTH

This month's household hint is from one of you!!  It's actually an "auto" hint rather than a household hint but I don't know any woman who couldn't use more information about her car :)  So here goes...

My hint is for cars. My husband is a mechanic so I do have an advantage. We drive old vehicles. Our "newest"is an 83 volvo.

        1. BEFORE you buy a new or used car, talk to a mechanic or a car nut who knows his stuff. They can tell you how often the car will really break down and how expensive it is to fix.

        2.Maintain your car. It is much cheaper to add a quart of oil then rebuild an engine.

        3.Learn how to do basic things yourself. Not only will this save money, but you become more familiar with your vehicle. This helps you know when there is a small problem BEFORE it becomes a big problem.
 
Want proof? We paid $550 for our volvo 4 years ago. Including new tires (that get rotated every 3 months) we have only spent around $500 additional dollars to maintain and repair it. This saves time, money and stress.
 
Kristine
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Parent like you mean business!  Stop nagging and fighting with your kids!  Get your home running more smoothly than it has ever run before.  Discover a simple, effective and proven system for putting sanity back into your life with the new ebook THE BUSINESS OF MOM!

Do you know what busy executives and moms have in common?  Everything!  They both have too much to do and too little time to do it in.  Busy executives have spent years developing, analyzing and testing systems to help them cope.  A few of those concepts have withstood the test of time and are used again and again by the most successful business managers today.  They have been adapted to the home environment to give moms help too.

If you haven't ordered your copy yet, you can get THE BUSINESS OF MOM for $15.00.  The first 100 to order will also receive membership to an exclusive discussion group designed to support you as you implement the theories from THE BUSINESS OF MOM!

For a full description and to order your copy securely, visit my Web site at http://www.betweenfriends.org/1.htm

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            PARENTING TIP OF THE MONTH

What areas of your child's life should you, his/her parent, actively monitor? New parenting research (The 2000 CASA National Survey of American Attitudes on Substance Abuse VI) shows there are 12 major areas that parents need to actively monitor. Teens (and preteens) with parents who regularly monitor and set expectations and rules in these 12 areas are up to 75% less likely to use drugs or get involved in other risky behaviors.

The first three areas are television watching, Internet
usage, and music selection.Good Parenting Action Points:

1) Monitor what your children watch on television/video.  Let them know that some shows and movies are unacceptable.

2) Monitor what your children do on the Internet. Violent and pornographic Web sites are everywhere and sexual predators routinely use chat rooms to form relationships with unsuspecting children. Develop guidelines for what is acceptable and not acceptable regarding Internet usage.

3) Put restrictions on what CDs they buy. You might be
shocked to know the lyrics of much of the music they listen to.

From: Emazing.com (http://www.emazing.com)

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             Pampering Yourself

Go out for breakfast (or any meal) all by yourself.  Take a book or a magazine.  Write that letter you've wanted to write, just sit and think or watch people.

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       HELP OTHERS WITHOUT SPENDING A DIME!

SPONSORS FEED HUNGRY SENIORS FOR FREE!

Meals On Wheels site, www.GiveMeals.com feeds hungry seniors with Advertisers/Sponsors paid donations!  Sponsors pay each time you CLICK, SHOP, JOIN or REGISTER.  Make GiveMeals.com your "Start Page" and never miss a chance to help. Visit  http://www.GiveMeals.com today and everyday.

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Please take 15 seconds of your valuable time and stop by The Hunger Site daily.  Every 3.6 seconds, someone dies of hunger on this planet and 3/4 of those deaths are children under 5 years old!  Every time you click on The Hunger Site's donation button, food is donated to help feed starving people.  The equivalent of two cups!  And it costs you NOTHING!  So please visit: http://www.thehungersite.com right now and help to feed those less fortunate.

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                    Disclaimer

The appearance of advertising in The Balanced Woman should not be interpreted as an endorsement by the editors of the service, product, business, or program being advertised.  We take no responsibility for claims or representations made in any ads.  The Balanced Woman is for informational and entertainment purposes only.  The ideas and information expressed in it have not been approved or authorized by anyone either explicitly or implicitly.  In no event shall Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale be liable for any damages whatsoever resulting from any action arising in connection with the use of this information or its publication, including any action for infringement of copyright or defamation.  The opinions expressed by our columnists are not necessarily the position of The Balanced Woman.

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Copyright 1999, 2000, 2001 JA Hale
Editor's Comments: If any of you have any ideas, comments and suggestions on how we can improve this e-zine please let me know.  Just send an email to: jahale95@yahoo.com

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