pick-up lines for losers like me
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roses are groovy violets are funky when i see you i spank my monkey
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wanna do math? add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and lets multiply!
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wanna play army?? i'll lay on the bed and you can blow the hell outta me!
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if one of your legs was thanksgiving and the other was christmas could we meet between the holidays?
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if i could rearrange the alphabet id put u and i together
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i know milk does the body good... but DAMN! how much have you been drinkin?
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Baby, you must be a broom, because you just swept me off my feet.
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girl, you must be tired, cause youve been running through my mind all day!
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Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? (Answer)- No. (Reply)-Well, then, allow me to introduce myself...
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how about you sit on my lap and we talk about the first thing that pops up?
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roses are red, pickles are green, i love your legs and whats in between
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wanna play house? you be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long
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its Be Cruel to Animals Week... will you choke my chicken?
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you know the more i drink, the prettier you get.
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my face is leaving in 15 minutes. be on it.
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there are 265 bones in your body. would you like another one?
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im no fred flinstone but i can make your Bedrock!
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hi. will you help me find my lost puppy? i think he ran into this cheap motel room across the street.
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nice lipstick. can i taste it?
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one for ugly people: im like chocolate pudding. i look like shit but im sweet as hell.
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my dicks been feeling a little dead lately. wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
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if you lived to be 100, i want to live to be 99, so that way i never have to live without you.
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ok first lick your finger. then touch her shirt. then touch your shirt with the same finger. then say to her "hey, wanna get out of these wet clothes?" Page 1 Page 2
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