The Dirty Half-Dozen

This one wasn't too full of surprises, and a little slow in places, but it was very watchable.

This is a parody of the old movie The Dirty Dozen,where,in this case,six people,five of them murderers(excepting Gabby) are trying to stop the metal of Hespestus from getting into the wrong hands.Actually,it is too late. Xena learns of this,but we never know who told her. Ares stole the secret and gave it to Agathon,his new protege. "Peace" is the reason Ares says he gave the secret away. This has to be a reference to when he wanted Xena to rule again in the Reckoning.

Xena rescues a guy from a beheading and then gets three others out of a jail,where all will be executed anyway. She manages to get into the cell thru a floor grate,but nobody there ever seems to be able to think of getting out that way.

The four thugs,all murderers,are introduced to Gabby. Xena says she made them into the scum they are. Gabby asks what would they have been had Xena not corrupted them.

Note: The guy who Xena saved never tried to remove the blindfold when riding thru the woods...he could have easily.

Xena trained one guy as an assassin,and one as a gladiator.

The freedom they will have will be their reward if they join with Xena and Gabby.

Note: They are killers and would still be wanted for execution.

They are attacked by the armored guys from Agathon's castle. "What did this?" someone asks when the broken shield is seen. Xena:"We're about to find out." Wait---doesn't she know that it has to be the new metal? How does she know about it,but not know what did it? Also,how does she know where the forge is and what is made there?

Fight scene: Xena jumps on the roof after she breaks her sword. Why leave the others to fight?. Where does she get an exact one in later eps,as she lost it when she dropped it in the lava in A Necessary Evil?

Why do the armored guys yell in pain when punched or kicked when they are wearing the armor?

Forge scene: we see pretty up-to-date stuff as a grinding wheel and special valves and a boiler.

Ares: "Xena's time with me has ended"....we see him keep trying to turn her until the end of the series.

The Camp:

There is a tent to be set up. We never see it,and we see them sleeping in the open on the ground.

Gabby;"What would have happened if I met you before?Is it timing or am I what you made me?" Xena answers at the end that it was in Gabby all the time.

I liked the continuation of the guessing-game that Gabby and Xena play. It seems as if Xena always is never the guesser.

Subplots: Kepp the killers awake at night watching each other so Gabby and Xena can sleep. Also,the "romance" between the javelin guy and dagger-girl.

Gabby:"I don't think I've ever been part of a true disaster before"...hey,Gabby,wait until The Deliverer.

Xena says King Gregor will use his army to help. Why lie,since Ares and Ag know it won't happen? Was it to get the group to have faith?

Xena kills Malik,who tho he was short,put up a good fight. He was a lot like Milo in Daughter of Pomira.

Xena wants the rest to bond in their effort to take the castle,as the Dirty Dozen plot did.

Xena senses Ares...he says it is a presence...Xena calls it a stench.

Again,Ares talks of peace,esp. after Ag killed thousands of troops with a few hundred of his own.

Castle attack: The Old Firepot Trick. The crossbow guy is a good shot,and with the fire and commotion,you'd think a LOT of guards would be swarming onto the walls in defense. Nope.

Xena's Chakram can pierce the metal,but she gets trapped in the tunnel.She and the dagger-girl and Gabby are in a jail cell. Supposedly ,the two guys join Ag for "cash".Javelin-guy is just following Xena's plan.

Short scene: Dagger-girl ridicules men thru the show and needles Gabby about her husband,Perdicus. Xena explains that a woman,Callisto,killed him. No follow-up,which would have shown that the woman had some kind of change of heart about men...she just asks Gabby about her hubby.

Xena: The bad people are US.

Ag: Go kill a peasant---relax.

Note: The stolen chain cuts thru these huge bars in seconds.

Big fight scene: same-old thing. A lot of kicks and swordplay. The javelin guy sort of kicks,but does not grab a weapon,of which there are a LOT. He later throws a dagger to save Dagger-girl.

Why doesn't Xena save one sword for herself? She needs a new one,and since her original one broke easily,it would have made sense to have one.

Also,why toss the weapons in the fire if the whole place,including Ag's army,was going to be blown up?

Why didn't Ares move the blast shield? He threw javelin-guy around...he said he would NOT intervene.

Showdown: the fast-draw at work with the "Chakrams".Xena's splits Ag's...he sees it for a couple seconds,but like the Furies in Coming Home,JUST DOES NOT DUCK or even dodge the shards.

At the end,javelin-guy and dagger-girl leave together. He has no javelin this time.Two murderers leaving...not much justice here. Who was Xena to decide to save SOME killers from execution,but not the rest? Couldn't others have been saved or change also?

Xena says that she couldn't stay on the straight and narrow without Gabby's constant help.

This episode was good anyway because I liked Agathon and the "romance" between two killers. There was good dialogue and it moved right along.

One well-photographed scene was when they set up camp: we see Xena and Gabby walking in the sun,with the trees back-lit along with the field. Well done.

<.font>How about Andrew’s take on this one? How about Andrew’s take on this one?

Xena leads a group of convicts in an attempt to foil another of Ares' plans, but has a major problem - how to keep her little team from murdering each other before the job's done!

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XENA AND GABRIELLE

This episode introduces the new, improved BGSB. It's somewhat briefer than the original, but not just for aesthetic reasons. Renée O'Connor found the old BGSB hindered her movements as her fighting style grew increasingly athletic, hence the changes. Apparently it was held together with velcro, and sometimes flew apart during fights - I can just picture Gary's eyes glazing over as he reads this!

When Gabrielle learns that the four convicts were basically normal people whom Xena corrupted during her warlord days, it makes the young bard wonder about herself and the effect Xena has had on her character. She asks her friend "Am I really who I am, or am I what you made me?" Xena has no answer to this question until the end of the episode, when she says "You're Gabrielle. Bard, Amazon Princess, best friend. Nobody made you who you are. It was already there. The question is, who would I be without you?"

It's worth noting that Xena and Gabby still enjoy playing "Who Am I?", as seen in A DAY IN THE LIFE. Gabrielle isn't above questioning the wisdom of Xena's plan, saying "I don't think I've ever been part of a complete disaster before." After Monlik's death Xena clearly reaches the conclusion that she has no hope of winning over all her unwilling recruits, concentrating instead on Darnelle, the most likeable of the bunch. His cooperation proves crucial to foiling Agathon and Ares.

Gabrielle looks slightly nervous handling the "grenades" in their attack on the castle, as well she might! Nevertheless, she continues to demonstrate the throwing ability seen in several earlier episodes. She also reacts forcefully to Glaphyra's taunts about Perdicas, slamming her back against the bars of their cage. Xena tells Glaphyra that she might have been able to change sooner had she met Gabrielle earlier, a testament to the effect the bard has had on Xena's life.

GENERAL OBSERVATIONS

Ares has a new look, with sideburns and a studded leather vest. I think I preferred his earlier outfit with the high collar. Despite his denial, it's clear that the God of War's feelings for Xena haven't changed. He looks apprehensive when Agathon says he's going to kill her, and his efforts to dissuade Xena from interfering seem to be aimed at protecting her rather than his own plans.

Gabrielle demonstrates an interesting fact in this episode, namely that a heavily armoured man is still vulnerable to the concussion effect of a blunt weapon. Knives and arrows bounce off Agathon's soldiers, and even Xena's sword breaks, but Gabby proceeds to knock them senseless with her staff. This is why maces and war hammers became so popular in the Middle Ages, when the near perfection of plate armour rendered swords virtually useless. Joints were always vulnerable, however, and Walsim exploits this fact with several well-placed arrows.

Two figures from earlier seasons are mentioned in this episode: Thersites (killed by Xena in A FISTFUL OF DINARS) and King Gregor (seen in CRADLE OF HOPE and the opening credits of Seasons 1-5).

Xena's recruits are a thinly-drawn group, with little or no character development given to Walsim or Monlik. The latter's trick of sleeping with his eyes open is good for a laugh, however, following the all-night "Mexican standoff". The reason for Glaphyra's hatred of men is never properly explained, although it appears she has been betrayed on more than one occasion. Darnelle seems to have become a gladiator simply because he enjoys a good fight, and his developing relationship with Glaphyra is amusing if somewhat predictable. His condescension towards Gabrielle also warms into genuine respect, as does Glaphyra's.

When Agathon tells Ares "I don't need your help, just don't get in the way", the God of War's face is an absolute picture! The late Kevin Smith had very expressive features, and they're used to full advantage in this scene.

There's a little tribute to the Western genre in Xena's final confrontation with Agathon. Her fingers twitch over her chakram, much like a gunfighter's over his six-shooter.

FAMILIAR FACES

Charles Mesure (Mercer in THE PRICE) steals several scenes here as Darnelle, the brash former gladiator. He has one of the episode's best lines, as he examines the fatally impaled Monlik: "That's gotta be uncomfortable!"

MUSICAL HIGHLIGHTS

There's some very good, original music being played when Xena's squad assaults Agathon's castle - rather "Errol Flynn" in nature.

LITTLE PROBLEMS

How did Xena and Gabrielle manage to reach the woods ahead of Argo and Walsim?

Ares' opinion of him notwithstanding, I still find it hard to take Agathon seriously. Julius Caesar would have made a much more formidable opponent. Maybe that's the reason Agathon was chosen - the show required an enemy Xena could defeat. Imagine Caesar's military genius combined with a Roman legion wearing Ares' super-armour. They would have been unstoppable, even for Xena.

When Monlik throws his axe at Xena, he holds it with the blade forward on the back swing, which makes sense. When he throws, however, the axe is reversed so that the rear spike is to the front. Wouldn't it have been more realistic to have the axe blade sink into the tree trunk, with Monlik impaled on the spike?

When Xena's team attacks the castle, Walsim shoots two guards in less than two seconds - with a CROSSBOW? The guard who lands at the foot of the castle wall has two arrows in his body. You'd expect him to have the sense to take cover after the first hit, rather than stand on the parapet.

What are the castle walls made of, pumice? Glaphyra's knives sink almost hilt-deep into the "stone", further in fact than Darnelle's javelin.

Xena kills one of Agathon's men with her chakram after entering the castle. Why didn't she use it in her original encounter with them? Speaking of the chakram, isn't it convenient that Agathon leaves it hanging in the armoury, where Xena can get her hands on it?

Walsim flees, presumably leaving the castle before it blows up, but is never seen again. I just HATE loose plot threads like that!

We see Xena, Gabrielle and Glaphyra fleeing the castle as it explodes, but there's no sign of Darnelle. The explosion is certainly impressive, especially the gate collapsing outwards, but causes a problem with the next episode.

Gabrielle is referred to several times as "Princess" or "Amazon Princess". Surely she's still the Amazon Queen, with Ephiny acting as her Regent?

This episode raises a serious question of morality. Xena sets herself above the law, releasing a group of convicted killers to aid her against Ares and Agathon. Okay, there's the whole "greater good" argument, but there's no guarantee that Darnelle and Glaphyra's reform will be permanent. Walsim is missing, presumably alive and very much unreformed, so Xena and Gabrielle are guilty of aiding and abetting the escape of a convicted felon. Does the end always justify the means?

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Although it has some good moments, THE DIRTY HALF DOZEN is let down by sloppy writing (unusual for Steven L. Sears) and a dubious moral message. Like A FISTFUL OF DINARS, it shows that Xenaverse rip-offs of original stories are rarely successful. In addition it was aired out of sequence, an error repeated in the video release. This causes a major continuity problem at the beginning of next week's episode, THE DELIVERER.

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