2/28/99

Fucking long day. Why is it that intelligent, responsible people take advantage of one another the minute things get tight? Today wasn't anyone's fault. Okay, it was someone's fault, but it was an honest mistake. The new manager of my department accidentally scheduled me out at 2 p today, and the next person in at 3. This is the first time that this particular thing has happened, but I got to thinking, while I was fuming at 2:05, and I realized that I haven't worked a day since Christmas when I haven't been inconvenienced either at the beginning or the end of my shift. Strike inconvenienced--I meant "used". The 6 a cashier doesn't show up when I open the store, or the person relieving me calls in, or doesn't show up. The midnight cashier's an hour late when I close. I'm known in the store as a sort of conspirator--I make deals and I don't tattle.

So, about a month ago I opened the store at 6 on a Sunday and was scheduled until 3 with no break, which is typical for a Sunday. Around 8 the woman who was scheduled in at 3 called in, "I'm just sick as a dog! There's just no way...." I got on the phone. I called every person in the department. Except, of course, for the one who won't let us have her phone number. (Funny, she had no problem calling me to close the store when she had an exam to study for.) I did call the numberless girl's mother, who also works in our department.

Mother says, "Oh, I can't, it's my anniversary...we're going out to dinner...."

"No problem," I said, "oh, that's cool, enjoy your dinner...by the way, can I get [your daughter's] number from you so I can ask her to--"

(sudden change of tone) "No! I mean, no, I'll call her if you need her."

"Well, I was going to--"

"Well, she can't come in either, she's taking us out to dinner."

(sound of me scratching my chin thoughtfully) "Oh, really? She's on the schedule at 7, you know, I was just going to ask her to come in a little--"

"I'll call her. But she won't be able to do it, she's very busy with school."

Right, whatever you'll call her, you maniac. I know you're not calling anyone because you want me to call the manager and make her come in for the 14th day straight because you're mad at her for getting a job in another store. Too bad I had dinner plans that day for real, with my boyfriend who was going in the Air Force 2 days later.

Crazy thing? I closed the store with Maniac last Wednesday and she told me this funny little story about how she had to work on her anniversary and everyone else in the family went out to dinner without her. Hi-fucking-larious. She was oblivious to my disgust. I have an excellent memory for conversation, she didn't know that either, freaking moron.

I didn't stay that Sunday. I made them search until they convinced someone to come in from another store. That day marked my graduation from workplace doormat to pseudo-sympathetic hardass. Two weeks later, Maniac's daughter was an hour late when she misread the schedule. I was frantic to get home, I knew John was trying to call me from basic and he'd only have a minute to talk, and not another chance to call until the next week. That week I handed my keys to the cashier supervisor, who had a basic knowledge of the office procedures. And today...today I had a recital to attend, I turned over the office and the safe containing something like 30 thousand dollars in cash to the floral manager and the vendor receiver. I will not do any more favors. I used to think that if I was available for others they'd be available for me. Never once, before last month, did I turn down a plea for extra help. I have never called in to this job. I am late only when it is absolutely unavoidable. I get paid less than the people whose asses I'm covering. The day that I spent on the phone, listening to sorry excuses, changed me forever.